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From Hate To Love And Back Again by Irish_Ginny

Format: Novel
Chapters: 27
Word Count: 66,986

Rating: 12+
Warnings: Mild Language, Mild Violence, Scenes of a Mild Sexual Nature

Genres: Fluff, Humor, Romance
Characters: Lupin, Sirius, Lily, James, Pettigrew, Voldemort, OC
Pairings: James/Lily, OC/OC, Remus/OC, Sirius/OC

First Published: 05/31/2006
Last Chapter: 10/23/2006
Last Updated: 11/01/2006

Thanks to the wonderful Midori for such an amazing banner!!!

This takes place during James and Lily's 7th Year. After James is once again rejected by Lily he asks the other Marauders for help. But is this a good idea? Especially if Sirius is helping? Join James, Lily and their friends as they tackle their last year and everything it brings; love, loss and laughter. PLEASE REVIEW!!!! I really need you to tell me what you think!!

Chapter 11: Chapter 11: Acceptance and Recovery

Chapter 11: Acceptance and Recovery

James woke several hours later to find himself still sitting on Lily’s bed with Lily wrapped tightly in his arms. He smiled to himself. “What did I ever do to deserve someone so perfect?”

He thought back over the last few hours remembering everything that had happened: Lily kissing him, Lily telling him she loved him. It made him smile even more widely.

It wasn’t exactly how he imagined it happening, but it didn’t matter. All that did was that they were together and nothing could tear them apart. He was going to make sure of that.

He looked down again at Lily. “She seems so fragile, like she is made of glass,” he thought. “She is so beautiful, so perfect. She doesn’t deserve to have her life torn apart and her parents taken from her,” he thought to himself, but stopped, because the thought of what happened to her made him want to kill Voldemort and is Death Eaters.

He felt Lily stir under him and looked down to see her eyes were open and she was smiling at him. “She is so beautiful. I wish this moment could last forever,”

He smiled back at her and leaned down to kiss her. She returned his kiss, running her hand up his neck and into his hair. “This is how it is supposed to be, just the two of us. No one to destroy our lives,” she thought kissing him passionately.

They kissed for several minutes. Neither of them wanted to stop but they heard footsteps and the door opening. They broke apart quickly and looked up to see Sirius and Remus standing in the doorway, smiling widely at them.

“Well it seems you two have finally come to you senses,” laughed Sirius placing a tray he had been holding onto James’ lap.

“Your mother sent us up with breakfast to see if you wanted any. I think she knew something was going on and didn’t want to walk in on you,” said Remus smiling at James and Lily who both blushed.

“So we volunteered instead,” said Sirius brightly. “We had no problem walking in on you. By the way Prongs,” he said turning to James. “What are you doing in the bed? Don’t you think you are taking things a bit fast?”

The other three laughed. James knew Sirius was trying to lighten the mood and cheer Lily up, for which he was very grateful. Or maybe he was just being Sirius? It was hard to tell sometimes with him.

Remus hit Sirius on the arm for his last comment.

“What Moony? I was just cheering Lily up. Although I think Prongs has already seen to that,” he said smiling cheekily at her. He then received three pillows in the face.

“Why did you guys do that?”

“What? There was no book handy and Lily was holding the cup, I had nothing else to hit you with,” James said smiling at Sirius who scowled.

“Ok, the new official rule of the Marauders is ‘No one is to hit Sirius with any item. He is off limits as his amazing good looks are at risk. Ow, what did you do that for Prongs? You just broke the rule!” he asked rubbing his head where the plastic cup had hit him.

James put up his two hands in an innocent fashion and looked at Lily who was leaning against him laughing. Sirius looked at her questioningly.

“What? You said it was the Marauders new rule no one was allowed to hit you. I knew James really wanted to hit you, so since I am not a Marauder, I did it for him,” she said smiling sweetly at him.

James and Remus were laughing so hard, they were nearly crying. Between the look on Sirius’ face and what Lily had done, they were both doing well to still be sitting upright and not rolling around on the floor.

“Now I know why I fell in love with you. You are completely amazing. That was brilliant,” James laughed before kissing her. He was glad she was able to still have a good time. He knew she wasn’t over her parents death, no where near it, but at least she was able to deal with it and wasn’t closing herself off to him.

They stayed like that for a few minutes, laughing. Well James, Lily and Remus were laughing; Sirius was scowling at all of them.

“So what did you guys really come up here for? It couldn’t have been for breakfast or see me throw a cup at Sirius,” asked Lily still laughing.

“Well no, that was just an added bonus. We actually came up to say goodbye. We have to go back to school this morning. We were supposed to go back last night but Dumbledore decided it would be best if we had some rest so we are leaving in a few minutes,” said Remus before looking directly at Lily. “How are you doing?” he asked kindly.

Lily sighed. “Ok. I mean I’m not over it obviously, but I’m accepting it. I am doing better than I expected and I have you three to thank for that,” she said looking around at the three boys who were all looking at her with sadness in their eyes. At her words James pulled her into him and kissed the top of her head.

“I am really sorry for what happened Lily,” said Remus.

“So am I Remus. Thank you for saying that. It means a lot to know you care,” she said tears in her eyes.

“Hey, I care too. I care a lot,” piped up Sirius from the other side of the bed. Lily laughed at him. She knew he wanted to cheer her up and she was glad for that. “I am so lucky to have friends like these,”

“I know you care Sirius. Thank you,” she said smiling at him. “Why do you guys have to go?” she asked.

“Dumbledore said he felt it would be better for you if you weren’t surrounded by too many people. I also think he had a feeling that you two might want to be alone for a while,” said Remus looking at the two of them with his eyebrow raised.

James and Lily looked slightly guilty but grinned anyway. Then Remus stood up and pulled Sirius with him. “I think it is time for us to go,” he said.

James nodded and eased out from under Lily.

“Ok, I’ll come down with you,” said Lily from the bed and James looked around at her, slightly worried.

“Are you sure you will be able to get up?” he asked.

“Of course, I’m fine, there is not- Ouch!” she exclaimed as she made a move to get out of the bed. Apparently the pain of realising her parents were gone and numbed the physical pain in her body. But the unexpected move had brought it back.

“Lily, are you ok? Maybe you should stay here,” James said rushing back to her and grabbing her hand.

“I’m fine. I just….I just moved too fast. That’s all,” she said, still panting after the sharp pain she had experienced.

“Ok, if you really want to get up, we can just take it slower this time. And warn me before you move. You frightened the life out of me,” James said.

Lily smiled and held on tight to his arm as he helped her get gently to her feet. She got a bit dizzy when she stood first and grabbed onto James for support.

“Are you ok?” Remus asked her with concern.

“Sure she is, this is another excuse to hold onto Prongs,” said Sirius smiling at Lily, but he was just trying to hide his own concern for her.

She smiled at Sirius. “As much as it pains me to say this Sirius, you are right,” she said smiling up at James who was towering above her.

James smiled back at her cheekily. “You don’t need an excuse, just ask. I am very happy to help.”

They all laughed at this and made their way very slowly from the room. Lily was very weak and had to lean strongly on James to keep herself upright. James had his arm around her waist, holding onto her tightly and supporting her body against him. He still wasn’t sure that getting up was a good idea, but if Lily felt she was able for it and she wanted to, he was going to be there with her. Every step of the way, no matter how long it took, he was not going to leave her.

It took twenty minutes for them to get down the stairs and into the hall leading to the kitchen. Lily looked around the house as she walking through it, completely mesmerised by its beauty. She loved this house, and she had only been down one hall and in room. But this house had something that only two other places in the world had, one of which didn’t have that something for the last seven years, and never would again. Thinking about her destroyed house and her parents brought tears to her eyes again. James looked at her and stopped before entering the kitchen.

“What is wrong Lils? Is it hurting you to walk? I can take you back upstairs if you want. Oh Lil honey, don’t cry, what is wrong?” James asked leading her over to a chair and sitting her in it. He then crouched down in front of her and looked into her eyes.

“It’s this house,” she said looking around the beautifully decorated hall. “It is perfect,” she continued at the confused look on James face, which didn’t change much with this statement. “It’s just, it has such a homey feel to it. It makes me feel warm and loved just being here.”

“But you are Lils. Everyone in this house loves you. Especially me,” James said.

“I know that James. I love being here. It is so beautiful and amazing. I love when a place makes me feel at home. Only two other places have every made me feel like this, and one of them is gone forever. Your house just reminds me of it,” she said, tears starting to fall down her cheeks.

James got up off the floor and sat on the chair, lifting her onto his lap gently, and kissing the top of her head. She buried her head in his chest again and he comforted her the best way he could, by simply holding her.

“That house was my first home,” she said lifting her head slightly. “I loved it. It wasn’t just the house, after all a house is just a building. It was the feeling inside it. The feeling of walking through those doors and knowing you were loved. But when I got into Hogwarts, that feeling changed. My own sister hated me and, even though they supported me, my parents didn’t know me anymore. They didn’t know about magic or Hogwarts, and they still loved me. But Petunia didn’t. She wouldn’t accept me and I nearly dreaded going home when I knew she was going to be there, and I hated that. I wanted for her to accept me so badly, but she wouldn’t. She turned cold against me and my home didn’t feel like home after. I felt like I was a burden, the three months I spent there every summer. But now it is gone. I will never get to walk through the front door again to feel that love you should feel when you are with your family. But I don’t have one of those anymore either,” she said sobbing into James again who was shocked at what Lily had said. He knew Lily’s sister hated the fact she was a witch, but he didn’t think it upset her this much. He rubbed his hand up and down her back in a soothing way and kissed the top of her head. But Lily wasn’t finished.

“So I took refuge in Hogwarts. It was the only place I felt I actually fitted in. I tried so hard to become a great witch. I wanted to show people you don’t have to be pureblood to succeed. But, it never worked. If I was any good I would have been able to save them. I thought Petunia would start to realise that my being a witch wasn’t so bad, but she never did. She is going to say it is my fault this happened, she said being a witch was bound to cause problems. And maybe she is right. If I wasn’t a witch, none of this would have happened. My parents would still be alive, I would have a home and she wouldn’t hate me.”

James pulled her in even closer to him. “Lily you don’t honestly regret coming to Hogwarts do you? If you never came you wouldn’t have met me, or Alice, or Jo. Even if you didn’t become a witch Lily, it doesn’t mean Voldemort wouldn’t have come after you. He just would have hunted you for a different reason. You survived because you are an amazing witch. You are Head Girl. That is not something you are born with, you have to work for it, and you did. You proved you belonged at Hogwarts, even though you are not pureblood. You showed everyone in the school that you can do anything. Dumbledore knows you are an amazing witch, so do I, and Remus, and Sirius, and Alice, and Jo and even Voldemort. If he thought you were weak would he ever have come after you? If you weren’t meant to be one of the greatest witches ever, would you have escaped him last year and again this year? No, you wouldn’t have. You are the brightest and most skilled witch I have ever seen, but you need to believe that. So don’t doubt who you are Lily. You are an amazing person and witch. You risked your life trying to save your family. I bet they were, and still are, so proud of you. I know I am,” he said kissing her on the lips, as if reinforcing what he just said.

“I love you Lily Evans and I am not going to let you go. We are going to get through this together. You and me,”

Lily looked into his deep hazel eyes and saw a determination and love so strong, it brought tears to her eyes because she knew that that love, that passion, that determination, it was all for her, and only her. She never wanted to lose that. She wouldn’t be able to cope if she did.

“I love you too James Potter. I will never leave you. You are stuck with me for life now and there is nothing you can do,”

“I think I can live with that,” he answered smiling, before leaning down and kissing her deeply. Lily wrapped her arms around him and ran her fingers through his hair, pulling his head closer, deepening the kiss. James pulled Lily right into him and kissed her back with as much love and passion as she was kissing him with.

What neither of them knew was that they were being watched. When Sirius and Remus arrived in the kitchen and saw that James and Lily were not with them they turned back and made to go out the door when they saw Lily and James in the hall. They stayed at the door listening, only to be joined by Mr and Mrs Potter, McGonnagall, Slughorn and even, surprisingly Dumbledore.

Mrs Potter watched her son. Her eyes were shining with tears. She was so proud of him she couldn’t put it into words, so she cried. She was so happy her son had found someone to love and care for. She knew he would love Lily with all his heart. She was glad James was there to help Lily through this. “She is a very lucky girl,” she thought as she watched them kissing. “We did a good job raising him. I couldn’t have asked for a better son,” she thought again and reached for her husbands hand and hoping James and Lily would end up as happy as they had.

“Nicely done James, nicely done,” Dumbledore said smiling to himself. He knew he didn’t make a mistake choosing his Head Boy.

A/N: Please tell me what you think? Please please please!! Thank you! = )