Chapter 1 : Confession 1 - Of Sickness, Boys And Shocks
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Here I am, alone in my dorm lying in bed on a Friday night. I should really be coming back from dinner with everyone else, but no, I'm stuck in bed. I've been ill since Sunday, and it's now Friday. Now normally I don't get ill at all and apart from the odd cough or cold I'm always fine. I don't have a bloody clue as to what's wrong with me, except...
There was knock at the door and my cousin Rose entered, making me lose my train of thought. Her red hair was pulled back into a pony and her uniform was still as neat as it is when she leaves for breakfast in the morning. I briefly wondered if she should be in the library or reading a book since that's all she does.
Rose came over and sat on the end of my bed making it creak a little. I felt her cold hand on my warm forehead to check my temperature like my mum normally does if I'm ill, "Feeling any better Lil's?" She asked as she took her hand away.
"Urghhh." I managed to groan as I sat up slowly.
"I'll take that as a no then." She chuckled, Actually chuckled to herself about me not being well. I saw her rummage around her school bag which she had dropped on the floor and pull out some books. "By the way you've got homework. Roxy picked it up and asked me to give it to you."
Rose then started to ramble on about what I've got to do, but I wasn't listening, I just sat there and nodded my head every now and again. I was annoyed at the fact she had chuckled to herself about me being ill, I mean she wasn't the one who hasn't been able to keep down any food over the past six days apart from a few bits of toast. She wasn't the one who had been sick at least ten times each day, morning, afternoon and night.
She wasn't the one who had a weird metallic taste in her mouth, she wasn't the one who was constantly tired but couldn't sleep. She wasn't the one waiting for this months period, she wasn't the one... Oh shit, then it dawned on me, realisation hitting me like a slap in the face. I couldn't be could I?. Oh no, Oh no, double shit.
"Earth to Lily, are you still there." Rose said as she waved her hand in front of my face.
"Huh," I shook my head, "Rose listen I don't think that this is some bug. I think, I think, IthinkIcouldbepregnant." I blurted out.
Rose looked at me and I could see she was trying to register what I had said, "Wait, what did you say Lil?"
I sighed, "While you were babbling on about homework that I'm probably not going to do, I was talking to myself in my head saying only you could chuckle at me being ill. And how you're not going what I'm going through, and I mean according to my head I'm still waiting for this months period." I explained as I watched her bottom jaw go straight to the floor.
"But Lil's, your periods are all over the place. I expect you'll be on next week."
I shook my head, "Rose, we're not all as clockwork as you. But I can just feel that something is wrong, I've got all these symptoms and I don't that it's food poisoning."
Rose looked at me, "Well what are they?" I listed all my symptoms, her blue eyes were as big as saucers after I had said the last one. "Lil I think you may be right, I mean they are all pretty much symptoms of being pregnant. As are feeling faint or dizzy and having sore boobs. But you haven't had sex have you Lil, because otherwise it's pretty impossible."
"Hmm," I mumbled as I thought about what she had said, I have been feeling a little dizzy and my boobs have been sore but then again they normally are when I'm due on. "Well yeah I might have had sex." I said casually and then added, "How come you know the symptoms of being pregnant?"
"Wait what?, are you saying that you're not a virgin." Rose said a shocked look on her face.
I could see that she was avoiding my question but nodded any way and her jaw dropped again. "Once you've picked your mouth up off the floor, are you going to tell me how you know the symptoms of being pregnant? I did notice you avoided my question."
Her mouth closed and then she started to do an impression of a goldfish, "I, well, I, well. Well isn't it obvious Lil, look at the size of our family. Someone's always been pregnant."
"I shot her a look that said 'liar', "I know fully well that is complete and utter bullshit as no one has been pregnant in our family for fifteen, sixteen years. And I know for a fact that you were only three when Lucy was born. So that is so not how you know."
"Fine," She practically yelled, I noticed her eyes looked slightly cloudy as she said, "If you must know I was..."
Rose stopped as the door opened and in walked Laura, one of my dorm mates. Great I was just about to fine out how Rose knew the symptoms of being pregnant and in walks her of all people. She's nice and everything but she's one of the biggest gossip's in our year apart from her best mate Becca Parkinson. I bet she's come to see if she can find out what's wrong with me. So far I've gotten away with saying food poisoning for the first two days but now I've said I must have picked up some virus.
"Oh hi Rose, I didn't know you were going to be here. I just came to check on Lily and see of she wanted any food." She said indicating to the plate in her hand.
Yeah right, it's most likely that she's trying to see if she can spread some gossip about me, I thought.
"I've brought a plate of roast chicken, stuffing, vegetables and gravy." She told us as she came closer.
As mouth watering as that sounded my stomach had other ideas. As soon as I caught a whiff of it I hurled myself out of bed causing Rose to squeal as she fell off, and ran to the bathroom to throw up the contents of my stomach. Trust me there wasn't much in there in the first place. I heard Rose tell Laura to take the food away and to tell the others to stay away as I needed peace and quiet.
I silently thanked Rose as I heard a soft knock on the bathroom door and Rose walked in. I felt the urge to be sick again and Rose held my ginger hair back as the toast that I ate this morning all came back up. Once I had finished I grabbed a hair bobble from the counter and pulled my hair up into a pony and attempted to brush my teeth.
As soon as the toothpaste touched the inside of my mouth I was sick again, instead of trying to brush my teeth again, I stayed sat on the floor next to the toilet. "Can you get me a glass of water please Rose." I croaked.
She went into the dorm and came back with the glass that had been sitting on my bedside table, she filled it with water and I took off her. My throat was really dry and there was a yucky taste in my mouth, I downed it and stood up slowly with a little help off Rose. I went back to bed and curled up under my duvet as Rose got me another glass of water.
She settled it down on my bedside table and sat back on the end of my bed before saying, "And if you must know, it's because I was in exactly the same position as you are now. That's how."
"What are you kidding me!" I tried to yell except my voice came out all croaky.
Rose looked at the floor and then at me, I could see tears in her eyes, "No Lil's I'm not." She whispered.
"But I see no baby, your stomach's still the same size as it was last year." I replied quietly.
Rose looked at me her eyes welling up, "That's because you wouldn't and I never had the baby. I miscarried last June, I was ten weeks and I would have been due last month." The tears were falling down her cheeks thick and fast.
I crawled down my bed and pulled her into a hug. "Oh Rosie, I'm so sorry I had no idea." Now I felt really bad about asking her why.
"It's ok Lil," She sniffed, "Not many people did know. I only found out I was pregnant three weeks before it happened. Only six people knew."
"I'm sorry Rosie." I couldn't believe what I was hearing, my cousin: Rose Weasley, professional know it all and the daughter of two thirds of the golden trio had gotten herself pregnant at seventeen and only six people knew. "Rose, how come only six people knew?"
Rose sniffed again and I handed her a tissue from the box next to my bed, "I told Scorpius that I thought I was the day after I realised, we did a test the week after and it confirmed that I was. Dom found out after she found me on the bathroom floor in our dorm, once she realised I was bleeding she went and got Madame Pomfrey. Madame Pomfrey told Dom that she had to call mum as she's my emergency contact and Dom couldn't exactly refuse. Mcgonagall had to know since she's the head and she excused me from classes as I was on strict bed rest and having counselling and the girl in the pharmacy: Bee." Rose sighed and her hands went down to her stomach.
My cousin Dominique Weasley, knew and I didn't. I get that she and Rose are best friends, but Rose and I have always been close since we were little. There might be an age difference but Rose is like the sister that I'll never have. If I had known I would have been there for her, I know that Rose didn't exactly have the best year, last year.
She told her parents that she was dating Scorpius Malfoy, needless to say Uncle Ron went ballistic, he hates anyone in the Malfoy family. Mainly because Scorpius' father and grandfather were death eaters, they tried killing him, Auntie Hermione and dad once. Uncle Ron's always hated the Malfoy's according to dad and I don't he'll change.
Uncle Ron is the only one in my family who has a problem with Rose dating a Malfoy. Nana loves Scorpius, whenever he comes to the Burrow she's always trying to give him seconds and thirds as according to her he needs fattening up. I mean it's not like it's some random boy Rose found on the street, ok so it's her dad's enemies son but Scorpius is my brother Al's best friend and we've know him for years.
Grabbing some more tissue's I wiped my tears as I realised I was crying and then wiped the tears from Rosie's cheeks. "I just can't believe it Rose." I said as my hands hovered over my own stomach, I was scared now. More scared that when I realised I might be pregnant.
Rose saw my hands hovering and said, "Lil I didn't mean to scare you. If you can manage, there's a Hogsmeade trip tomorrow, we can go and get a pregnancy test. How far do you think you are?"
I tried working it out in my head as Rose blew her nose but I gave up, I've never been the best at math." How long ago was the second of March, I know Slytherin beat us at quidditch that day."
"It was six weeks and one day ago." She replied almost instantly. God I wish I was as brainy as her when it comes to math and most subjects in general - well apart from Potions. Even though she's Hermione Weasley's daughter who was top of every subject in her year (except Defence Against The Dark Arts which my dad beat her in.) Rose isn't top of everything, she sucks at potions (She get's this from uncle Ron according to dad).
I'm really good at charms and potions, whenever I'm mad beware, I produce a mean bat bogey hex thanks to my mum who taught it me and my potions skills come from dad's mum and my namesake Lily. I'm rambling to myself again, aren't I.
"Who's the daddy Lil?" Rose asked whilst giving me a funny look.
"Huh?" I blurted out, I did not expect Rose to ask that. I mean I know she'll have to find out sometime but I always thought that I would tell the father I was pregnant first, not my cousin. Then again I didn't expect to be thinking I was pregnant at sixteen. I took a deep breath and mumbled, "It's Jake."
Rose looked at me and raised her eyebrows, "Jake as in Jacob Smith, the one in your year, best friends with my brother Hugo." I nodded, "I thought James and Al had scared him off years ago with their 'big brother' talk." She said giggling a little. I must say it's nice hearing her giggle.
"Yes that Jake. His brother Jamie is friends with Al and Scorpius." I said letting a giggle escape from my mouth. My two older brother's James and Albus are way too overprotective of me, back when I was a first year they yelled at a boy just for talking to me. Imagine how they'll react when they find out I'm pregnant. Aww crap, they're going to kill Jake for sure.
"Really but they don't look alike."
"Yeah, I know. You probably wouldn't have know they were brothers, but their mum's got brown hair and their dad's got black. Jake is like his mum and Jamie's like his dad." I pointed out. "Their sister Izzy is a sixth year and their other sister Lola is a first year and they've got six more sisters at home."
Rose's eye's widened, "Wow, their family sounds as big as our's. So how long have you been dating, my guess is a couple of months."
My stomach felt slightly funny as she said that, it could be because I haven't long thrown up or the fact that my cousin, my own flesh and blood would think that I would have sex with someone I had been dating for a few months. Please, I'm not my cousin Molly. She has a reputation for shagging on the second date.
I shifted so that I could cross my legs, "Actually we've been together two years."
"Two years, bloody hell!" She said looking shocked. "How did you meet?"
What is this Rose twenty questions? "At the new year's eve party two years ago, we started dating in the March and here we are two years later and still as happy."
My stomach felt funny again and I jumped off my bed and rushed to the bathroom, just in time as well. I made my way back into the door and climbed back in bed after draining another glass of water. Rose was now perched on our cousin Roxy's bed which is next to mine.
"Does anyone know about you two then, I'm surprised James or Al hasn't killed him."
As I got back into bed I rolled my eyes, "Of course people know, unlike you and Scorpius who kept it quiet for five whole years, that's....sixty months." I told her doing the math in my head.
"That's different. You know how much dad hates the Malfoy's. Anyway do James and Al know?"
I lead down and looked up at my canopy which I had decorated with stars and planets, "Well duh, his brother is friends with Al. James didn't exactly care as he was too busy studying and Al didn't mind, he was just glad it wasn't some leech who was going to use me because I'm famous."
"Um Lil," I looked over at Rose who looked a little sheepish, "I forgot to ask did you and Jake remember to use protection when you two you know."
"Rose if we did, I highly doubt that I would be sat here in bed on a Friday night throwing up, now would I dear cousin. I remember mumbling something that sounded like the contraceptive charm but I don't think I said it right. It was all heat of the moment."
She threw Roxy's pillow at me, "Eww too much info Lil, But you do actually know what it is right?"
"Of course it's Tueri Incantatem, mum told me it the night before my sixteenth birthday, along with a speech about being responsible." I told her.
"No it's not, either your mum doesn't know how to say it or you heard her wrong. It's Tueri Infantem. You should know Lil, I thought you were better at charms than me."
I threw the pillow back at her, "Haha, go in my trunk and somewhere at the bottom there should be a pink, frilly book called Charms and Potions for the 16+ Witch."
"Mother of Merlin, who in the world bought you this?" I looked up to see her looking horrified as she pulled it out of my trunk.
"James of course, who else? Look up the pages about love life." I instructed her as I lead back down on my pillows.
"Eww did James actually read this before he gave it to you, some of these pictures are really graphic." She commented.
"Probably not, I bet he just went into Flourish and Blotts and asked the shop assistant what he could get for his sisters sixteenth birthday"
"Why would you think that?"
I shrugged which was pretty hard to do when you’re lying down and said "I saw him that's why, he's so clever that he didn't realise that I could be in Flourish and Blotts as well. I swear he takes after your dad."
"Thanks, ah ha found it. The contraceptive charm is ninety-nine point nine per-cent effective if said correctly , the correct saying is Tueri Infantem and it can protect you from babies being produced. See I was right."
"Well there's nothing I can do about it now." I yawned.
"Well there is, you know you've got three options right."
"Yeah I know and I think I know what I'm going to do."
"What you gonna do?" Rose asked as she hovered over me, her schoolbag slung over her shoulder.
"I shall tell you tomorrow if I feel well enough to accompany you to Hogsmeade and we shall find out if I am most defiantly pregnant or not." I yawned again and my eyelids felt heavy, I tried batting away her face with my hand, "Now I'm not being rude Rosie, but can you go now please as all this talking and throwing up has made me kinda tired and I haven't been sleeping well all week. Oh and if you see my besties Livi and Kayl tell them I'm fine and I've gone to bed, make sure you tell Roxy as well. Also tell my dorm mates Cerys or Laura that is they wake me up there shall be bloody murder." I mumbled as I shut my eyes.
"Night Lil's." She whispered.
"Night Rosie." I mumbled into my pillow as I pulled my quilt up over me. I'm pretty sure that I fell asleep before the door had even closed.
A/N I see Lily and Rose as pretty close, kinda like sisters. What did you think of Rose's little bombshell? Does Laura give a good impression or is she just a nosy so and so....
Thanks for reading, reviews are much appreciated.
I'm re-writing each chapter - The characters, plot and ending aren't changing just the dialogue and the way it's written. Hope you enjoy it x
Edited - 02/04/13
Beta'd by The Quidditch Freak