Reading Reviews for In This Darkness
  
52 Reviews Found

Review #1, by Corinne Chapter Thirteen

24th April 2017:
ah this story is so good! really like the depth to lily and hugo's character!! looking forward to the next chapter!!

Author's Response: Corinne, thank you for reading and reviewing! I am so glad you like Lily and Hugo! The next chapter will be up soon! Just making final tweaks! :)

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Review #2, by Felpata Lupin Chapter Three

22nd April 2017:
Hi!
Here (after almost a month... I'm the absolute worst...) with your requested review!

I really liked Hugo as a character, I loved his dry honesty and his a bit shabby appearence. I like the idea that he and Lily are particularly close, I can totally see it happening, since they are the same age and both children of the Golden Trio, so I guess they spent a lot of time together since they were little children.

The dynamics among all three characters were interesting, too. Hugo and Xander, despite clearly being very different, seem to have a very deep connection and understanding that I find really interesting. Lily's jealousy is once again a bit immature, but completely understandable. Who wouldn't be annoyed by their best friend showing more complicity with a third person, especially someone they don't like? (Or someone they secretly like a lot, but that's another matter... :P)

I'll confess it, all the dating talk was a bit too much for me, but they are teenagers, so it is in character and believable and I guess it helped getting to know the three characters and some other people we'll probably meet again later, so don't mind me. ;)

Hope you don't mind me pointing this out, but there were a couple of typos here and there, for example:

"she would have chosen her as friend" guess you meant "him"

"Hugo was was sarcastic and blunt" you wrote "was" two times

It's nothing particularly big, but maybe you could try to give this a second read and fix them.

Aside from that, this was a nice chapter to read and I'm still very curious about what's next (and I can't wait to see how things between Xander and Lily develop... yes, I already ship them strongly)

I'll come back (and if I don't, feel free to remind me in my review thread. I'm slow but I always come, sooner or later)

Much love,
Chiara

Author's Response: Chiara, thank you so much for stopping by! I really appreciate all the feedback. I can totally see how the dialogue carried on a bit too much, and I'll try to keep that in my for the future. Also, thank you for pointing out the typos. I've gone ahead and fixed those.

Thank you once again! :)


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Review #3, by victoria_anne Chapter Eight

22nd April 2017:
Hello hello! ♥

First off, CONGRATULATIONS on being a featured story! That's very exciting and of course very well deserved!

Of course Xander wears leather. I'm drooling all over my keyboard here.

I'm a little bit sad that Lily had an opportunity to check him out longer while under the Cloak, and he ruined it for us - I mean, her... *ahem*

Oh my oh my oh my. Not-so-Invisible tension.

The way you write Xander's dialogue is so amazing. As a character I swear he just leaps right off the screen. The way he talks just flows so naturally and realistically, and I'm envious!

Another thing I really love about Xander is how he's always calling Lily out. It's hilarious most of the time, like him catching her smelling his jacket, haha!

She is so not subtle, oh my goodness. I'm cracking up with second hand embarrassment at her asking Xander if he's a bad boy.

SOMEONE'S CAUGHT THE FEELS!

AND SOMEONE WITH THOSE FEELS IS NOW IN THE BROOM CLOSET! MAYDAY! MAYDAY!

Excellent work as usual, Quilly! Can't wait (like really can't wait) to find out what happens next!



Author's Response: Thank you for the wonderful review! Like always, you are much too kind and you had me smiling while I read this. I'm glad you're enjoying Xander's dialogue and Lily's awkwardness. hehe

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Review #4, by Lily D Chapter Thirteen

19th April 2017:
Oh my god, Professor Reagan is so creepy - I love it! This is such an interesting plot twist and I love your description of characters. I can imagine them so clearly, Reagan with his clay nose, hunchback and bushy white eyebrows and Edward moving so slowly he could be underwater! That made me laugh out loud...

It was an interesting return to Xander's perspective also. I felt so attached to Lily that it was almost jarring to see her actions and why she is doing them but Xander so oblivious. It's great and it keeps the story fast paced and moving forward. Especially with this new Reagan development --I'm withholding judgment on him because although he looks crazy he could just be trying to help Xander contain his power which may come in useful. His approach is different to McGonagall's by that doesn't necessarily mean he is wrong. He's coming from a different place and understands Xander in a way McGonagall won't or can't. Plus I adore jealous Xander so there is that!

Hugo as well -- he was so cute in this chapter. I loved it when he told Xander to stop staring at Lily because Caroline might hold a grudge against her! Always got her back!!

Overall great chapter look forward to seeing what happens next!

Author's Response: Lol aw I'm so happy you liked the descriptions. And there'll be more to Professor Reagan later -- but I can't say much now. Thank you so much for your reviews! I really do love them so much!

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Review #5, by BBHP Chapter Thirteen

19th April 2017:
The tension between Xander and Lily is almost painfully heartbreaking! But it's so good that I almost want it to last a while. It'll make it that much sweeter if they do ever get together. I can't wait to find out what happens between Lily and that Edward guy. It can't be good (for him, at least) but I have a feeling he is a worse person than he pretends to be.

I love how much personality and uniqueness is in every character. It almost feels like these are real people with real problems.

I feel so anxious about Xander taking lessons from Professor Reagan! It seems like it's going to invite Xander down a path he shouldnt go down but it'll be almost too tempting to him.

Every time I see an update of this story I get so excited! It's such an addicting story and the writing I'd fantastic. Good work.

Author's Response: Thank you so much! I'm so happy you find the characters unique! And Professor Reagan will continue to make an appearance, but I can't say much more than that hehe

Again thank you so much for your continuous support! You're awesome!


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Review #6, by Lily D Chapter Twelve

12th April 2017:
This was such a beautiful chapter, and such a beautiful moment between a boy and a girl at a wedding could not have existed -- if it weren't tainted by Xander's stupidity!! The best word to describe this chapter would be bittersweet. You really captured the mood of the wedding, Lily's protectiveness, her relationship with her brothers...I mean, it goes back to what I said in a previous review about how everything is changing around Lily and how she is struggling to make sense of it all.

It's really bittersweet because growing up is painful, especially when you have to say goodbye to being the queen of your brother's eyes! Which is why I really liked the moment between James and Lily. It was sweet but not sappy and you really conveyed Lily's protective and caring nature. When she compared James to sunlight: it was such an honest and genuine comparison that was downplayed by his cheeky banter with Xander.

And it's really heartbreaking how Xander can't see what Lily is so plainly revealing...I'm not sure what it will take for him to lose his cool and finally say something (because I kind of feel it will be Xander and not Lily...but I can wait and see!!) but I'm really looking forward to it! I'm wired up, and the tension is building...I kind of feel like it's gonna be nuclear! I like jealous Lily but jealous Xander is so much better!! But I think he might reveal his love for Lily if she gets hurt ... but it's just a guess!!

Very excited for the next chapter --ooh, and I also loved the necklace he got for Lily, so much better than a cliche Lily flower! (And it goes without saying- Ballard's necklace.) I'm guessing the oak tree has some significance...

Author's Response: I really enjoyed writing that scene so I'm glad you enjoyed reading it. I haven't had much of a chance to develop James and Albus and their relationship with Xander/Lily, so I tried to do as much as I could with this scene.

Haha you're on the right direction in some of your predictions, but I don't want to give too much away!

I'm still working on the next chapter! But it'll be up soon! Thank you so much for your review!


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Review #7, by Lympha Chapter Twelve

12th April 2017:
Hi! I just wanted to let you know, that this is one of the best stories that I've read recently. It is intriguing with just the right amount of romance and mystery for my taste.
I'll be looking forward to reading more!

Author's Response: Wow that's a huge compliment! Thank you so much! Can't wait to see what you think of the upcoming chapter... I'm still working on it but it should be ready soon.

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Review #8, by Giu9_RedandGold Chapter Twelve

11th April 2017:
Hello!!! So sorry I couldn't leave a review on the last two chapters but I'v been without wifi for 2 extremely long weeks and I was left with my phone that can barely manage a text message, a review would've been too much!

Anyway, I absolutely loved this chapter! It was good to see more of the Potters. I feel like after seeing more of Lily's relationship with her brothers, I know her a little bit better, too.And when she's dancing with James and they're talking about Albus' new girlfriend and she says "Albus is the one that's a catch..." I don't know why exactaly, I'm an only child, but if I had a brother, that's the kind of relationship that I would want.

Now, Xander...I get it that if the girl that you have feelings for tells you that she is upset because of another boy, it hurts, and when you are hurt you do stupid things, like becoming hostile, and hiding behind a mask of rudeness and sleeping with a stranger. BUT!!! How is it possible that he sees right through Lily in every occasion except for the one time HE HAS TO?

This story kills me with every chapter! (but in a good way :D)

Author's Response: You don't have to apologize at all! I am sorry you had to go through two weeks of no wifi... I can't imagine the horror! lol

I enjoyed writing the Potters here. We only go to see them in that one scene in the beginning and then they were off to school so it felt nice having the opportunity to show their relationship with each other a little more.

Haha yeah, Xander's pretty blind. *shakes head*

Thank you so much for your review!


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Review #9, by JC Chapter Twelve

10th April 2017:
Fantastic and sweet story! Can't wait for the next chapter!
Please, let Xander realize Ballard has brown eyes!!! 😄

Author's Response: Aw thank you :) Haha Ballard does have blue eyes... But hopefully Xander will see that they weren't the ones Lily had in mind ;) Thank you for your review!

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Review #10, by BBHP Chapter Twelve

10th April 2017:
I've been anxiously awaiting this chapter and I absolutely loved it. The tension between Xander and Lily is too perfect. I got the chills when I read the part about the potential for another war. It seems like such good stuff is coming!

Author's Response: I'm glad you enjoyed the chapter! There's so much stuff coming! haha I can't wait to see what you think! Thank you for the review :)

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Review #11, by victoria_anne Chapter Seven

4th April 2017:
Quilly!

I finally found the time to return, sorry it took so long!

Oof, Lily's friends sound like they could be a bit of a handful, and a bit of extra pressure on Lily.

I KNEW Nia would be after Xander! That's just going to end in disaster for everyone involved.

I can't even review as I read like I usually do because I'm so sucked in!

Remember in chapter 3 how I commented about the scene seeming really long because it was mostly dialogue? Well this whole chapter is one scene, with girls talking, but it works. You've broken it up with enough feelings, thoughts and actions, and it had me gripped on every word. I'm watching you improve with every chapter, and it's amazing, and I'm proud!

♥ B

Author's Response: B!
I'm glad you enjoyed the chapter!
Thank you for stopping by! I'm glad you saw improvement. It's honestly still a weakness of mine so feel free to point it out whenever you see it! I'm trying to work on it so CC is always welcomed!


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Review #12, by BBHP Chapter Eleven

4th April 2017:
This is so good! I got to the end of the chapter and panicked because there isn't another one. Such an addicting story! I love Lily and Xander's interactions.

Author's Response: Thank you so much! I'm so happy you stumbled on this fic and liked it. I'm currently working on revisions on the next chapter, but it'll be up soon!

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Review #13, by Lily D Chapter Eleven

3rd April 2017:
I loved this chapter; Hugo's insight into Xander and Lily's relationship was really interesting. He really is a master manipulator, he knows exactly which buttons to push and get the information he wants! He confirmed a lot of Xander's feelings effortlessly. And he's really funny...I was dying when he was talking about Scorpius' quiet intelligence with his hair conditioning and face mask on!!!
I like that he has a strong attachment to Lily so he knows how she is going to react and see things that she doesn't want to see or can't see. And he accepts it and doesn't rush her or anything...it's so cute!
I'm intrigued about Ballard now as well...I think he's shaping into an important rival and I so can't wait to see Xander take him down!!
Anyway great chapter, I tried to save it for when you updated again but I'm already too addicted!! X

Author's Response: Lily! < 3
I always love hearing from you! You're so kind!
I love Hugo. The fact that he accepts Lily is so important! I'm glad you were able to see it that way.
There'll be some more Ballard down the road... ;)
The next chapter is going through some revisions, but it should be up soon! It just ended up being a little longer than I anticipated so I'm trying to make it as concise as possible! I'm glad you didn't save it since your reviews definitely motivate me to keep writing!


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Review #14, by Lily_Luna123 Chapter Eleven

2nd April 2017:
Loved the chapter! I'm really beginning to understand Lily and Xanders characters more! Can't wait for the next chapter xx

Author's Response: Thank you!

I'm glad you're getting a better understanding of the two! The next chapter is going through some revisions, but it'll be up soon! Can't wait to hear what you think!


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Review #15, by Giu9_RedandGold Chapter Ten

28th March 2017:
Thank you thank you thank you! I really needed this chapter. It helped me understand Lily much better and to appreciate her more. It was really sad how she compared herself to her mother and how she seemed disappointed in what she had become. BUT it was Teddy's hint at how she puts up a facade that tells us that she's not really that shallow. If the people near her, the people who love her can see it, then she will be able to see it too, and hopefully to get rid of it. I'm really happy, 'cause I like Lily a lot more after this chapter!

And as always, I loved the last part with Xander. What did he REALLY want to tell her? :)

Keep spoiling us with your quick and wonderful updates!!! ;)

Author's Response: Yay! I'm so glad you're enjoying Lily better now! There's different elements to her, and she sees her own faults but we'll see if she'll be able to get past them.

Haha he wanted to tell her that... Well hopefully we'll find out ;p

I'll update soon! I promise! I'm polishing off the next chapter but it should be up in... a few days? Hopefully. I'm aiming for that.


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Review #16, by Lily D Chapter Ten

28th March 2017:
Great chapter! I like how you're taking the time to build up and flesh out all the characters such as Teddy and Victoire. It really adds to the narrative and adds extra perspective to Lily. I wonder what Teddy and Xander's relationship is like?
I also feel like you went very in depth to describe Lily's feelings as a seventeen year old girl on her birthday. You expressed it so well. When everything is changing but you still look the same, how do you know who you even are? It added so many dimensions to her character and how everyone looks at her like this superficial girl but in reality she's more but doesn't know how to break away from that image she sees in the mirror.
I think the fact that she is still dealing with Ginny's death is another important aspect of this story. It clearly affects her and it was so heartbreaking when she compared herself to her mother and didn't think that they would be friends if they were in the same year at Hogwarts.
And also the moment Xander appears outside her door and she identifies the yearning in her eyes and the fact that everything is changing.like Victoire said, Lily's love story will give just as many other people unrealistic expectations of love!
Overall, a really important chapter for Lily!! I look forward to seeing Xander's reaction and development and as mentioned in my first review, more Hugo!
Sorry for the v ranty review, I just love your story and writing! Can't wait for the next update.

Author's Response: I loved your ranty review! Hehe

There are so many Weasley characters I want to include that it's hard pick and choose. Teddy and Victoire were chosen in order to add that extra perspective so I was happy to see that you caught that!

You'll also see more of Xander's relationship with the family (perhaps more inferred than straight out).

Yes, Ginny's death is an important part of the story - and will continue to be so. I think that with Lily and Ginny there's this element of having to live in the shadow. While Harry was the famous one, Ginny was also pretty hard to live up to, don't you think?

Haha there's more Hugo coming up! I promise! Let me know what you think of him :)


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Review #17, by Addictedtolife Chapter Ten

28th March 2017:
It's been such a long time sinds i read a story this good!i can't wait for the next chapter... like really, i want it now! :)

Author's Response: That's a huge compliment! Thank you! Haha I'm polishing up the next one, but it should be up in the couple of days... Hope you continue to enjoy!

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Review #18, by Lily_Luna123 Chapter Ten

28th March 2017:
Great chapter! Can't wait for the next!

Author's Response: Thank you! :) I'm polishing up the next one, and it should be up soon! I'm glad that you enjoyed this one!

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Review #19, by Lily D Chapter Nine

27th March 2017:
Oh wow - I can't remember the last time I felt this strongly about a ship! But you have Lily and Xander down to a notch -- it would have been almost too easy for their will they won't relationship to conclude in that broom closet and I was on the edge the entire time. They have a great chemistry and you've really mastered their dialogue.I almost want you to drag it out! I love how your writing steers away from predictability and tropes ... like the fact that xander isn't a bad boy, but is still sexy! And lily is flawed but still very much likeable.I can't wait to see where you take these characters and even the adorable Hugo and Hannah! Love this story, you write so well!!

Author's Response: Aw your kind words honestly made my day!

I'm glad you think those two have chemistry. I really did want them to be flawed, and I'm glad you still managed to like them despite this! Hugo is one of my favorites. I hope you continue to enjoy him because I really love writing his character out.

Again thank you for stopping by and reviewing! I hope to hear again from you soon :)


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Review #20, by crimson quill Chapter Nine

24th March 2017:
Hello Quilly (I'm stealing B's name for you!)

So I've been seeing this story around lots especially in the forum so I thought it was about time that I start reading this! Can I say I'm super impressed about your updating speed? I assume you've got chapters pre-written for this? maybe you just write fast? I'm totally impressed anyway.

I'm so enjoying this story, it does a lot so well! I think first the relationship between Lily/Xander is so interesting. I wasn't sure how it was going work without being weird considering they have grown up together!? So far, this hasn't been an issue at all. it's a bit like they're both secretly quite obsessed with each other. I think so far the pacing is great, slowly finding out more about their past relationship/friendship to build towards their future romantic relationship.

I just love Xander as a character, I'm a sucker for handsome mysterious characters like him. He is a mystery that I want to solve. I love it. He's so aloof and cool. No wonder Nia is so interested but you also showed that he has caring side too e.g. his concern for Lucy over her detention. Something that he shares with Lily.

I love the romantic story of Xander and Lily is underpinned by the mystery of Xander's past.

MYSTERY - you've created it and I'm so excited to see more of this element within the story. Xander has to discover more of his past! I thought the first chapter did so well at creating the mystery that had me hooked as it opened up so many plotlines from the word go.

I really admired your bold choice to kill off Ginny. it's quite shocking really! I think it explains a lot though when you describe Lily being only female so everyone wanted to please her. I thought the herbology scene was great to show the reader a different side of her without it being in her inner monologue.

‘Lily Potter & the Bows -Who-Wowed: Everything You Need for the Effortless School Girl Hair’ - I thought this headline was really cute and creative of you.

I'm also really shipping Hugo/Hannah btw!

So fabulous job quilly! ;D

Keep it up! I'll be keeping an eye on this one!
xo

Author's Response: Thank you so much for stopping by, reading, and leaving such a kind review! I do always have a few chapters ahead before posting, but it's currently going under lots of revision so it might take me a little longer to post.

I was happy to see that you noticed him caring about Lucy was something he had in common with Lily. I wanted to show that they did share some good qualities as well so I was happy you caught that!

As the story progresses, Xander's past becomes more and more important! There's so much to reveal in that sense but I'm trying to pace it as evenly as possible.

Again, thank you so much for your review! The next chapter is coming up soon. I hope you enjoy it! :)


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Review #21, by Giu9_RedandGold Chapter Nine

22nd March 2017:
Wonderful chapter, I loved it so much!
I love how protective Xander is of Lily. I don't think it's just jealousy, I think he genuinely cares and worries for her. And about that look and nod between Xander and Harry, I don't know if that was just Harry telling him "watch out for her" or there's actually more. Will we find out? Please??? :)

Anyway I don't have much to say, just that every chapter makes me fall in love with this story more and more. And thank you so much for such quick updates. I'm still trying to figure out Lily, but I'll get there eventually.

Cheers! xx

Author's Response: You're so sweet! I love hearing from you!

That nodd... You're on the right track! It'll be further implied later on again lol

I try to update as often as I can and really sweet reviews like yours really keep motivated so thank you so much!


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Review #22, by AutumnRed Chapter Nine

21st March 2017:
Oh my Godric Gryffindor! I can't even wait for the next chapter! I love this so much and am looking forward to where you go with it.

xx,
A.R.

Author's Response: A.R. Thank you so much for stopping by and reviewing! I'm glad you enjoyed the chapter and I really hope you like what's coming next! Stay tuned! I'm polishing the next chapter now, but it should be up sometime in the next week.

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Review #23, by victoria_anne Chapter Six

21st March 2017:
I have things to do, Quilly, so if you could stop leaving me wanting more, that would be great.

Jokes! But how can I resist with a chapter summary like that, especially when it starts in Xander's POV?

I love love love how many details Xander notices about Lily. He's got it bad.

And speaking of Lily, I love reading about the darker side to having a famous father. All the thoughts that Caroline (among others, I'm sure) has are pretty expected, even if they're not very nice. I bet they do all think she has life handed to her on a silver platter.
Oh and look at her using her powers with the thestral.

It's an extremely interesting detail to have Xander struggle to grow plants. The idea that living things don't respond to him very much adds to his dark demeanour. It makes me wonder even more what you have planned for Xander in the future.

In fact, that whole Herbology scene is amazing. I was annoyed at Caroline for Lily's sake, haha! But even just with Xander's thoughts of Professor Longbottom (which is totally accurate - I bet he really wouldn't seem like the type of person who destroyed a Horcrux in battle) and the description of the plants needing love and smiles is so enjoyable.

Uh oh, and now the two of them are up to no good?!

Another excellent chapter - I'll be back soon!



Author's Response: B < 3

Thank you so much for reviewing two chapters back to back!

I love love love how you notice Xander noticing Lily hehe I don't want to give too much away, but I wanted it be sort of obvious that he did...

People are bound to think her life was handed to her on a silver platter, right? I mean people sometimes drew those conclusions about Harry himself, and the poor kid grew up in a cupboard.

Haha I always loved Neville so much! I love how he was always sweet and kind and then bam! surprised everyone by growing up to be one of the most awesome characters of all.

Thank you for all your wonderful insight as always! I hope you enjoy the next few chapters!


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Review #24, by victoria_anne Chapter Five

21st March 2017:
Hello Quilly! ♥

I have so much to say about that very first paragraph. How do you do that?! It's an interesting way to open a chapter, I love every word. Although I'm surprised that Xander doesn't like his reflection. I suppose I just assumed that he would. Ooh and the mirror is the entrance to the Head dorm? That's flipping awesome! That's such a cool detail.

I love the idea that he wants to occupy his time with learning to become an Animagus. I wonder what form he would take? The way McGonagall refuses Xander in so many things is so similar to Dumbledore and Tom Riddle, and I'm kind of glad she's there to make sure he doesn't get carried away.

I like that Hugo can see straight through Xander. I think that's important for Xander, and it's especially good for him to have a true friend (even if Xander is using him to get others out of detention *rolls eyes*)

Um, excuse me, Xander, there is no such thing as awful bed hair :P

“Empty corridors are way too public,” said Xander with a sly smile, “for the things I like to do." OMG what are you doing to me, Quilly?!

I think one (just one - there's so many!) of the appealing things about this story is how far from perfect the main characters are. Lily and Xander may have a lot in commom, but not all of these things are good. The characters feel real.

You honestly have such a talent, and I can't wait to read more from you!

♥ B

Author's Response: Hello!

Confession time hehe I hate mirrors so I wanted Xander, who has so many inner struggles, to also hate them.

McGonagall is way too smart to be so easily persuade by a charming student. And she has that past experience with Riddle and knowing that brilliant, handsome students aren't always best is definitely going to affect her decisions regarding him.

Hugo is a good friend, isn't he? I think he has his own flaws... He's perhaps too honest? In any case, it keeps his over egoistically best friends grounded.

I'm so glad you thought the characters real! That's a constant struggle in every single chapter that I write. I want to make sure all the characters are believable. So feel free to point out if you ever feel like they stop coming off that way.

By the way, I officially love Quilly and will now be using it < 3


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Review #25, by Lily_Luna123 Chapter Nine

21st March 2017:
Thanks for the awesome chapter :) I am absolutely loving this story!!! there aren't enough lily potter fanfics out there! thank you :) xx

Author's Response: Thank you for reading AND reviewing! I'm glad you're enjoying the story! I hope you like what's to come!

And I agree! There's not enough Lily Potter on here! She's a great character to write though because there's so little we know about her...


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