Reading Reviews for A Million Little Things
  
3 Reviews Found

Review #1, by Veritaserum27 The Beginning of a Beautiful Friendship

21st May 2015:
Hi there!

I'm here for the BvB!

I'd already read the first chapter of this and I saw that this one had no reviews, so I thought I'd drop by. This is a really cute tale of the train ride and the sorting hat. You did a fantastic job depicting a nervous first year with all of the apprehensions and uncertainties that go along with it. I have to admit that I think I've only read one chapter of The Shadows Within, so I'm not up with that story. Still, I don't think that detracted from this. I really like the idea that you're giving us the back story for each character individually while tying all of that in with the story of their first days at Hogwarts. It also didn't miss my attention that Lily hasn't been mentioned yet, and that intrigued me.

Was the blond boy on the train Remus? I think so - you gave us just enough detail to figure that out, without saying it (I LOVE that). I also love that you've placed Claire in Gryffindor without her having the "typical" traits. Sometimes I think as authors we feel like each character has to be the "quintessential" Gryffindor (or Ravenclaw, or Hufflepuff, or Slyther). Instead, characters are much more interesting when they possess a trait that is not as obvious. There are many different ways to be brave - and that immediately gives your story more depth.

I'm interested to know what will come next for this group of kids! Keep up the good work!

♥ Beth

Author's Response: Hi Beth, thanks for stopping by!

Lily's chapter is the next one. I felt like the first couple of chapters were needed to establish the other characters and show how they teamed up in their early days. Lily's chapter is next and it takes a bit of a twist on the others, pulling in something referenced in the main story in passing.

I purposefully left other characters a bit ambiguous. I'm glad you liked the reasoning for Claire, since I wanted to avoid making the group too cliche.

Thanks for the lovely review. =)


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Review #2, by Veritaserum27 Dragon Hearstring & Unicorn Hair

12th May 2015:
Hello, hello!

I'm here for the BvB!

I've only read the prologue of The Shadows Within, so I hope you're alright with me jumping to this story. I thought it would be nice to get a bit of back story on the characters for that :)

This was a really sweet, fluffy first chapter. I liked the light tone that you set. Naomi and her mother seem to be a bit overwhelmed at the suddenness of learning about magic and how the entire wizarding world works - and that seems realistic and appropriate. Of course it would be a shock to learn that you (or your daughter) were a witch and there was an entire world out there that you never knew existed. You've written Naomi as a believable eleven year old - as she's still got a bit of that wonder and awe within her, along with a fair dash of uncertainty.

And I LOVE stories about finding your first wand. Great job with all your characterizations. The goblins ARE intimidating (especially to muggles) and Ollivander was done really well too!

I found one tiny typo at the end:

It was a weird feeling for somebody who had not even know that magic was real a few weeks prior, but it made her feel wonderful.

I think you meant to write "known" instead of "know."

I also really enjoyed the description of when Naomi knew the wand was hers.

Great job!

♥ Beth

Author's Response: Hi Beth, thanks for stopping by!

I have a fairly big cast in The Shadows Within, which makes it hard to show everything so I decided this would be the best way to pull in some stuff about her friends and things mentioned in passing.

I'm glad you liked the light tone (even though it's, uh, not so light in the main story at times). I figured an 11-year-old Muggleborn would have to be so excited about everything. Except, perhaps, the creepy goblins.

Yes to everything about the wands. I'm fascinated by how people seem to know if the wand is working for them right away.

Thanks for pointing out the typo, I'll go fix that now!

Thanks again for the sweet review. =)


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Review #3, by TreacleTart Dragon Hearstring & Unicorn Hair

27th April 2015:
Hey there!

I'm here for our review swap!

I picked this story because the concept sounded interesting. Missing moments for a whole group of OC's. I was truthfully a bit nervous that I wouldn't understand what was going on since I hadn't read the other story, but this was easy to follow.

I thought you did a nice job of illustrating what it would be like for a muggle child to find out about the Wizarding World. I would imagine there would be so much to see and do that she wouldn't know where to start! I guess Gringotts would be the logical place since as you pointed out, you need money before you can shop!

I thought the description of her wand selection stayed very in tune to what we know of them from the series. The little bits about her assuming that her wand hand would be the same as her writing hand really helped create that image of uncertainty that I think most muggleborns would feel.

I did notice one small typo, but it's quite nitpicky really. "explain it, but the somehow" The word "the" just needs to be removed.

All in all, a nice view into the life of a muggle who has just found out she's a witch!

~Kaitlin

Author's Response: Hi Kaitlin, thanks for the swap!

I'm glad you liked the Muggleborn exploring Diagon Alley for the first time idea. I was a bit worried of making it sound too much like Harry's, but I tried to bring in what I felt the first time I "saw" the magical world.

Thanks for pointing out the typo, I have since sent off an edited chapter so it will hopefully be fixed in the next couple of days.

Thanks again for the swap! =)


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