Reading Reviews for The Last Heir
  
14 Reviews Found

Review #1, by Soph True Identity

5th July 2014:
wow didn't see that coming!

Author's Response: Haha, well thank you! I hope you enjoy the rest!

Tori x


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Review #2, by Soph Promises

5th July 2014:
really cool story! Isn't Lucius in Azkaban though?

Author's Response: Thank you! And, yes he is, but he escaped at this time- I go more into it in the next chapter!

Tori x


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Review #3, by missalyssa The Stork Arrives

4th July 2014:
Love this story, its so good!

Author's Response: Awe! Thank you so much!!!

Tori x


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Review #4, by Talia Welcome Home

17th June 2014:
Absolutely love this story, you must make a part 2

Author's Response: Thank you so much!! And I am! Look out for it!!

Tori x


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Review #5, by rosepetal14 The Dark Mark

13th May 2014:
This chapter is absolutely amazing! Please keep writing, and could there be some more Charlie and Draco action :)? X

Author's Response: Thank you!! I am writing still, I'm thinking about 5 or 6 more chapters! I'll try putting more action in lol! Keep reviewing!

Torix


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Review #6, by Alysea The Dark Mark

8th May 2014:
Good chapter, but I should point out that Voldemort was never proud of the Riddle blood he carried. That was the blood of his Muggle father, the one that abandoned his mother. It's the Slytherin blood he is very proud of.

Author's Response: I actually didn't know that, so thank you! I'll change that ASAP!

Torix


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Review #7, by Alysea True Identity

8th May 2014:
I kind of saw that coming. I am interested in where you plan on taking that.

Author's Response: I honestly have no idea where I'm taking it at this point...I'm going with the flow!

Torix


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Review #8, by Canadiangrl18 The Dark Mark

7th May 2014:
I love it
more, more, more
>:( but did you really need to kill nana

Author's Response: Thank you! I'm glad you like it!! I did have to kill her, I'm sorry! I didn't want to either!!!

Torix


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Review #9, by Canadiangrl18 True Identity

27th April 2014:
Hey plz update ;(
Btw great story what is her reaction

Author's Response: I'll update soon! Thank you for reading! :)

Torix


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Review #10, by Willow True Identity

27th April 2014:
Wow this is really good!! Please update soon(:

Author's Response: Thank you! I will!

Torix


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Review #11, by Iellwen Being Noticed

21st April 2014:
Aaah, such sweet love! That is sure a warm, cute chapter!

I love their discussion; how they ask each other little and big questions to get to know each other! That's how my BF and I got to know each other, at work - such a perfect way to converse quickly!! :D
Though I'm thinking Draco just warmed her up until the time was ripe; I'm thinking he really just wanted to ask her that one question... Hehehe^^

I love that her heart skips a beat when he calls her love (I totally know how she feels! ♥ )


If you don't mind, a little CC for you:

Maybe that's just me, but I thought "My seat was at the very end, a detailed carving of a tree scared the wood from my butter knife when I had nothing better to do. " was a bit confusing.
I'm thinking you mean something along the lines of:
"My seat was at the very end [of the table], right by a carving of a tree, scarring the wood - a past-time of mine when boredom overcame me." or something? (I'm not trying to tell you what to write, it's just the first sentence I thought of when I re-read the line - I'm no where near good enough to beta-read ^^)

Maybe you could use italics for the notes they scribble, to clearly separate them (though they were separate enough as it is for now, but it might get a bit confusing should you fix the copy/pasting gaps^^)

It would be perfect if you added a few details about the setting, the second part for example (I wonder, were they in the Library or in class?) :)

Anyway - just a few thoughts^^

You updated this story so quickly - I have to catch up, don't I?
Hehe, I'm looking forward to it :D

Author's Response: First off, thank you so much for reviewing! And yes, you are straight on with the carving in the table, I'll try and make that more clear!

I'll try and make it more descriptive, I just rush around trying to get my thoughts down before I lose them! Ill go back and edit, so thank you!

Feel free to review on anything else you're confused about or just like! I appreciate everything!

Have a nice day!

xTorix


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Review #12, by rosepetal14 Promises

20th March 2014:
I absolutely love this story

Author's Response: Thank you so much!!

xTori


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Review #13, by goldensnitch_1997 Sixth Year

16th March 2014:
upload soon :) love it so much

Author's Response: I will, I promise! The newest chapter will be up in a couple of days! I'm glad you like it :)

Tori x


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Review #14, by Iellwen Invisible

1st March 2014:
Hi there, it's bingo time! :D

What a great first chapter!
It introduces your protagonist through so many little details! And a Peverell, nonetheless!

The spacing was a bit wide - have you tried to 'paste as plain text' button (it works wonders) ^^
Had a little typo: 'remembering the look on m parents face'

So Charlotte is in her sixth year (did I understand right?) and runs into seducer Draco Malfoy; this promises an interesting romance with a good chemistry ^^

You've got my attention and will read more of me on further chapters ;) That was a great read!
Go Slytherin!! :D

Author's Response: Thank you so much for the review and for your tip on my spacing! I will fix that mistake right now, thank you for pointing it out! Charlotte is in her fourth year, as the triwizard tournament is happening! I'll try and make that more clear!!

Thank you for the review, again, and I hope you like what is to come!

-Tori x


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