Reading Reviews for Serendipity
4 Reviews Found

Review #1, by Singularity welcome home

4th March 2014:
Hi there :) Here for the B vs. B review battle.

First of all, I should note that this is pretty far from what I normally read (for some reason, I don't really read much next gen).

I thought this was a good introduction to the story. You did well with setting up the characters and establishing the group dynamic. I felt like I got a pretty good feel for each character and their role within the group. I didn't really like Jess's character, but I have the feeling that she is someone who will grow on you the more you get to know her. (I mean, she seems to have great friends, so she's probably a pretty good person).

Honestly, I think my favorite part was the description of Louis's eyes: "The best thing about Louis are his eyes; theyíre a vivid blue, like the colour of the Californian sky and sea when they meet at the horizon. Itís a beautiful cornflower shade that sparkled in the amber rays of the setting sun, and crinkled ever so slightly when he laughed." Not only is it a really lovely description, but it is a really nice hint that she is not nearly as over her crush as she thinks she is. I'm sorry Jess, but if that's the way you're describing his eyes, then you've got it bad. :P I thought it helped set up the little moment between Jess and Louis at the end.

Speaking of, I thought that was really well done, too. It seemed to unfold pretty naturally, and the awkwardness was well written.

Overall, I think you've done a good job with this chapter, and with introducing the characters and parts of the storyline. Despite it not being exactly my cup of tea, I did enjoy reading it.

Author's Response: Thank you so much! I'm the total opposite, I'm an absolute sucker for next-gen, haha. I know, a lot of people haven't responded well to Jess, but she's very fun to write and I like being able to play with an anti-Mary Sue figure- yeah, maybe she will change in the future.
Thanks again for reviewing! Bea x

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Review #2, by cosmical welcome home

9th February 2014:
Okay, I'm absolutely in love with this??
I love the group of friends (reminds me a bit of Skins) and how typically untypical they are!
Again, I love all rude charismatic pretty boys so I can't help but love Louis naturally and Rudy seems to remind me of Alex Turner already, esp. since you mentioned the Northern accent
Jess is brill, I'm always up for the negative protagonist
I also see the parallels in names between your characters in Fluorescent Adolescent (i'm quite the avid fan already haha) and I just wanted to know... are they the same characters in a different story or just the same names? I think its just the same names but just making sure!
i digrees, update soon pls,
jade xx

Author's Response: you are lit my favourite person ever !! skins ♥ can we just??? thank you sO much for that comparison ily x102462938 skins is not my life but it does take up quite a large percentage of it.
also um yES regarding the alex turner reference, omg are you my new best friend or wHATT
jasmine azalea is just such a sikk name in my opinion, i wanted to re-use it haha. no, they're not linked in the slightest.
bea xx

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Review #3, by lea_ welcome home

7th February 2014:
Another story, eh?! This is exciting! Per ush, I have a lot to cover so ahem.

1) Favorite quote of the chapter: "I am a strong believer in free stuff; not necessarily for everyone, this opinion just concerns me."
I LOL-ed because it's one of those universal statements that no one ever says out loud but everyone thinks.
2) I love that they were eating guacamole in an American restaurant.
3) I'm intrigued by the characters. I don't know how much I like them exactly, haha, but I know I am definitely interested in continuing to read their story. It's a bit of a personal thing, I suppose, but those "ironically-popular" kids (ya know, the we're-popular-but-we're-against-popularity type) always annoyed me.
4) As of right now, Lorcan is my favorite. But perhaps that's best I'm just easily charmed already.
5) Louis is a bit of a tool for the moment, but I can see the potential for more as the story continues. Also, I can definitely see the manifestations of a fear of growing up/the future from him. So that will be interesting to watch unravel as their 7th year progresses.
6) Do you watch HIMYM? Because Rose already reminds me of the character Patrice on there and that makes me laugh because I'm already imaging Jess yelling at her for every simple she does like, "I made cookies for you." - "NO ONE CARES, ROSE."
7) I love the title, and this chapter. Well done, I can't wait for more!

Author's Response: omg wow thank you so much for this!
regarding point 3, i know, the ironically-popular group is an age-old cliche but i felt like it was the sort of group dynamics i could write well, especially as my friendship group slightly reflect the gang. i'm sorry it annoys you!! maybe i should go over it, i don't know, but i really don't want them to be annoying!!
haha, i watch himym occasionally so i don't really know patrice. but i'll keep an eye out for her!
love bea xx

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Review #4, by love_is_magic_ welcome home

7th February 2014:
Here for the review swap!

This was a really lovely chapter! It was wayy out of my normal reading genre, so it made for a nice change! You asked if I liked Louis and yes, I did! I hesitate to say this but it was Jess who I liked less. But I know that she was cynical and negative on purpose, so well done on successfully portraying her as such :D

I just have one really random and picky tip. I feel like they would more likely be trying to sneak firewhiskey than vodka into school. Also, didn't she mention that she was legal (at least in Britain) to do magic? That would also make her of legal drinking age, would it not? I may be missing something but I just thought I would point that out (:

Overall, it was really well written and I enjoyed it!


Author's Response: hey! sorry for the late reply, i'm horrible. jess IS meant to be cynical and negative, and she's not meant to be universally liked- i wrote her as an anti-mary sue, as this story follows quite a cliche storyline. i just hope there are fragments within her persona that people can relate to, really!
haha, thanks for pointing that out. i'll go over it now :) thanks again! bea xx

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