Reading Reviews for A Chronicle of Wasted Time
  
21 Reviews Found

Review #1, by MadiMalfoy Vindication

9th July 2014:
No! Not Jeremiah's portrait! :(( How dare you take my heart and rip it to shreds! I loved your integration of the muggle world and magical world outside of Hogwarts; it flowed seamlessly with the Fat Lady's life inside the safety of the castle.

Professor Dumbledore's kindness is spot-on with his canonical characterization! Offering the Fat Lady the post of Gryffindor House's entrance portrait illustrates this trait seen so often in him throughout the books. It's so sweet how you wrote her as remembering her husband so much and doing things the way she thinks he would to keep his memory alive. But oh, Tom Riddle, you sneaky little turd! The Fat Lady handled the different situations thrown at her very well and only regretted not giving out her words of wisdom; but thank you for having them in there as sort of a pick-me-up from the sadness of the story so far.

Wonderful wonderful story, I'm glad you continue to write beautiful things such as this! :)
~MadiMalfoy x

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Review #2, by MadiMalfoy Sensation

9th July 2014:
Hi again! :)

Well, isn't this just the coolest story ever!! A multi-chaptered piece about the portrait of the Fat Lady and her existence?! It almost seems too good to be true! (So naturally I favorited it to make sure I remembered it).

Your portrayal of the way magical portraits come to life awed me and was truly quite elegant. You have a way of using words and turning them into the exact kind of descriptors the scene needed. All of your literature references made me smile--I like when the author adds a personal touch as part of the story! :)

I shall continue reading :)
~MadiMalfoy x

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Review #3, by patronus_charm Vindication

12th February 2014:
Yay, back again :D

Seriously, you are literally writing my historical canon for the Harry Potter world. I mean, I will now forever think that St. Mungoís also cared for Muggles during the war as well as wizards. Itís just such a perfect and simple idea which I really loved because yeah they were all cute and bonding. The way you managed to include subtle things such as the tensions between helping muggles were really great too and just provided a really wide and great perspective for the story!

Ah, Dumbledore was so perfect the way he cared about how a portrait would feel too, itís just so him. Iím not even joking, I genuinely feel upset with the death of Jeremiah, it was just so cute and unexpected to fall for portrait love but I did. Gah, I think the way you wrote the Fat Ladyís response is what did it for me because she just seemed so lost and forlorn without him as he helped her so much, and yeah, feels!

When she found out she was going to guard the common room it was so cute to see how excited she was, I just wanted to aw like crazy! I think it was the fact she wanted to do Jeremiah proud and the way it sort of helped her live on after his death is what did it for me, and yeah stop making portraits be so cute it feels weird saying it :P

I really loved how you tied Riddle in with the story and I feel so silly not making the link with Hephzibah beforehand! Itís strange how if he didnít have such a clever mind and turned to the ghosts and portraits of Hogwarts he never would have made the horcruxes. The ending was so lovely too with the way her love for Jeremiah was so true as she was still pining away for him now years later.

This was such a fun and different story to read, and Iím so glad I came back to it :D

-Kiana

Author's Response: Hi again! :)

Ahh yay! :D I'm glad you like the history here, and I felt that the wizarding hospitals would open their doors to Muggles in times of need. I felt there would be some difficulties and a few things which were hard to explain, and I'm glad you appreciated those as well.

I'm happy to hear you thought this was in character for Dumbledore. Well good, I mean I'm not glad you were upset but I'm glad you connected with Jeremiah's death. :( I almost spared him because I liked him so much but it had to happen for the story. :(

Aw yay, I'm glad you liked her excitement! :) I felt that having something to do and a purpose would be a really important moment for her. Haha I know what you mean about portraits and how weird it is to ship them. :P

Ah I'm glad you liked Riddle and Hepzibah! :) The mentions of her were a little sneaky, hehe, but I'm glad you liked the link. It's very true, in a way he was good at looking to the low figures in the castle for information while some other wizards wouldn't have thought of that, but then he also underestimates people - he's weird. :P I'm glad you liked the ending too! ♥

Thanks so much for the brilliant reviews, Kiana! :) They really made my day! :D


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Review #4, by patronus_charm Sensation

12th February 2014:
Iíve been meaning to come back to this ever since I originally swapped with you, itís only now that Iíve had time to so hi again :D

Ah this line Ďa killer who stalked the fallen women of the London slums sensationalized headlines, leaving a trail of slashed corpses.í If this is a nod towards the Jack the Ripper, I love you because the story about him has always fascinated me :D I loved all the other references to what was going on in that period too because they were so much fun!

I really enjoyed the perspective this story brought with the fake world within the painting contrasting nicely with the real world as it made me look at the story in a different light and that was a ton of fun to do! I think I felt that the most when the Fat Lady went to Violetís house and was without her husband, I actually really felt for her then because as painting she evidently still had feelings but the restricted mobility and the effect on those feelings was something I had never really thought about before, so thanks for including that as it was just so interesting to read!

I think my favourite part of this chapter was when she moved to Hogwarts because it was just so much fun seeing the humorous element with Dippet and Merrythought because usually when theyíre featured it takes on a darker element with Riddle obviously being the focus of those stories, but this was such a nice change. Ok, I know I keep on saying that, but it really was, Iíve just never read anything like this before and itís so much fun to read!

Sorry that this review is rather short and garbled but I really want to get to the next chapter before going to bed!

-Kiana

Author's Response: Hi Kiana! :) Thanks so much for coming back, it's really lovely to hear your thoughts on this story. :D

It is Jack the Ripper, I'm so happy you noticed it! :) I'm simultaneously interested and terrified by his story so couldn't resist putting it in here. I was thinking of writing a story focusing on that and him being magical, and I imagine it would have been a large issue at the time.

I'm glad you liked the contrasts between the portraits and the real world as well. it was a lot of fun to write and imagine how things would be different. She did have feelings here, it was so sad to write, and I'm glad you liked it. I found the idea of having no control over her situation just really tragic.

I'm glad you liked the professors as well - they were quite fun to write in how rather corrupt they were. :P I'm really glad you liked it and found it unique, I had such a good time writing this and I really appreciate getting positive feedback on it.

Thanks so much for the lovely review, dear! ♥


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Review #5, by patronus_charm Creation

1st February 2014:
Hi, here for the review swap!

Wow, this was such a fun and unique story Iím so glad that I decided to read it! I think my favourite part of it was the way you carefully showed how each layer was painted on to perfection and had so much care put into it. It was almost like a big reveal scene going on throughout the chapter because I didnít know what to expect from each addition to the painting so it was a lot of fun to read.

Another thing I really loved was the artistís love for art and painting, it just made the story even more enjoyable to see his creation unfold in front of him. Even though his personality wasnít as strong as the portraits one I still got such a clear sense of him and he really warmed himself to me through that and that was so nice to see.

The real Fat Lady was so much fun to read too! I really loved the fact she was friends with Violet in real life because it just made this story even funnier how they couldnít be departed in death and gossiped away in each otherís portraits. She really was vile, though in a good way! It reminded me of that scene in the films when she insists on singing until she breaks the glass and just that image was reflected in here so well and it was just really wonderful.

I adored Jeremiah, he was such a dear! I think the way he handled the delicacy of having a mistake in the portrait was really excellent and showed just how lovely he was. Then the way he just wants to help her settle into her new home was another really lovely scene and just made me want to aw away. This was such a great to the story!

-Kiana

Author's Response: Hi Kiana! :)

Aw, I'm so glad you liked it! I loved writing this story and it's amazing to get such nice feedback from you here. I quite liked writing the opening scene and how she was created so I'm glad you liked it.

It's interesting to hear you liked the artist, but I'm happy to hear it. I imagined him quite engrossed in his craft and far more interested in that than in anything else. We only really see him through the Fat Lady's eyes, but she does see him pretty much as he is, and she's a lot more three-dimensional than he is here, so to speak. :P

Haha yes! I loved writing the real Fat Lady and how obnoxious she was and how she inspired the portrait's behaviour. Violet was fun to imagine as well. Ah yes, I love that scene - I'm so glad you thought she came across well.

Aw, Jeremiah is so wonderful! I'm glad you liked him as well. He's a very classical gentleman and has only the best intentions, and he was quite fun to write.

Thanks so much for the lovely review! :D



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Review #6, by toomanycurls Vindication

20th January 2014:
Hello!! Review swap addict here. :D

Oh my, those letters sound rather racy. I do like the Victorian romance they have with each other. the idea of people falling and staying in love over such a distance is extremely romantic to me.

I like the Fat Lady's meeting of Dumbledore. It gives a good sense of her age that she refered to him as young. I could see Dumbledore taking the time to care about the portraits.

Forboding struck me as soon as Fortescue couldn't make it to his other painting. I love how you weaved in the information about the hospital and people not agreeing with it to its fire and destruction. The information seemed so benign at first and a good example of wizarding prejustice but then it became oh so painfully relevant to the Fat Lady. :(

I don't think Jeremiah's destruction could have been any sadder. It speaks well of Dumbledore that he would pass such information himself (or even bother to at all). Her grief felt so realistic and was sad.

I love how Dumbledore approaches her to be the guard to Gryffindor tower! And her being put in Jeremiah's frame is wonderful. :D

Having Tom Riddle visit her and charm information from her regarding the cup was brilliant. I wondered if he would have come by and asked her about it once you wrote that it was *that* cup.

It's interesting that the Smiths would visit her painting. I'm not terribly surprised that she's not impressed by them. It's a bit sad how the father views her as less valuable alone - that statement just struck a chord with me.

Oh your ending is so bittersweet. I love that she goes on and gets to watch generations pass before her eyes but so sad that none of them stop to know her or her wisdom.

I've enjoyed this story so much!
-Rose

Author's Response: Hello! :) Haha review swaps are just love.

Haha yes! I imagined there would be some racy things though in true Victorian tradition the Lady would never tell anybody else about it. :P I think it's romantic too- it really shows true commitment and love.

I'm glad you liked Dumbledore- I imagined him being very involved with everyone around Hogwarts no matter how insignificant they seemed.

I'm happy to hear you felt the ominous hints set in! I quite liked coming up with the descriptions of what might have happened at the hospital. It really did creep up on her and was so unfair that it happened to Jeremiah. :(

Ah, Dumbledore was just so great in my imagination here! I liked the idea of his watching out for the Fat Lady.

I'm glad you liked Riddle's appearance! Hehe, I'm glad you predicted that might happen- it tied in rather unexpectedly for me while writing it and helped the story come full circle.

Haha, I imagined not many people would be impressed by having Zacharias Smith as a family member. :P I'm glad that stuck out for you - I thought it showed how she was really just a possession to most people.

Aw, bittersweet, I know. It's not really a happy ending, or an ending at all, but I like to have hope that she had a decent life.

Thanks so much for the amazing reviews! :D It's lovely to know you liked the story. :)


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Review #7, by marauderfan Vindication

18th January 2014:
The stranger at the end of the last chapter was Dumbledore! I'm not sure how I didn't pick up on that earlier, but I love that detail.

Jeremiah is dead! Aw :( that's really sad. I like that she was moved to his frame though after they salvaged the frame from the fire- that's sweet. You had a good explanation of how she ended up guarding Gryffindor Tower, too. She does seem like the type to enjoy both the responsibility and the gossip that would come from having such a position!

OMGVOLDEMORT this section was so crazy! in a good way. Firstly I love how you've written the way that Tom Riddle got hold of the cup, and how he got the information from her. Of course the Fat Lady would be inclined to give information to someone who shows interest in her painting other than just seeing it as the door into their common room - she's noticed for once. Sneaky Voldemort, sneaky. And then... Zizi (whose name I had just thought sounded rather like a house elf but hadn't bothered to figure out what it was the nickname for, even though it should have been obvious) is Hepzibah! OF COURSE- that's brilliant. I'm just freaking out over the fact that Hepzibah Smith is the (real-life) Fat Lady's daughter. And giggling at the fact that a descendant of Hufflepuff is guarding Gryffindor Tower :D

Aww, Dumbledore :( Yeah, I bet she would be really sad about that. Dumbledore always notices the "unimportant" people - and unlike Voldemort who is doing that for personal gain, Dumbledore really just cares about everyone.

Oh and there's Zacharias Smith, too. I love the way you've tied all these characters' stories together as little threads in a large tapestry. (or painting, as it were.)

Aw, I really liked the last two paragraphs. I feel badly for the Fat Lady, no one really does listen to her and she has such a rich, wonderful story to tell! Also, I'd never really considered her history before this fic, I'd just assumed she was always there in front of Gryffindor Tower, so I liked the fact that you ascribed a date for her appearance there.

What a refreshing, original fic - wonderful job! I'm so glad I read this! :D

Author's Response: Hola! :)

Yes, it was! :D It was a little secretive since the Lady didn't know who he was at the time. I'm glad you liked his inclusion, though, I felt he would be very involved in the lives of all the beings and underdogs at Hogwarts. :)

I know! It makes me sad too. :( I'm glad you liked how she ended up in his frame - for portraits I imagined that would be quite intimate. And yes, I felt it would be a great place for her to really come into her own as the bossy and important Fat Lady we know from the books.

Voldy!! Haha, the inspiration for the Voldy appearance and how she's kind of the one who points him in the direction of Zizi (thus signing Zizi's death sentence without realizing) sort of came to me as I was writing this chapter and I knew I had to include the cup. I imagined she would be flattered and liking having the attention. Hehe I'm glad you found it brilliant and ironic that a Hufflepuff is the guardian for Gryffindor tower- I think that the Fat Lady is more of a Hufflepuff than the real Fat Lady was, to be honest, but she fits in as a Gryffie as well.

I thought so! :( Dumbledore and Jeremiah (and Sir Cadoga, sort of...) were the only ones to really care about her and notice her, so I imagined it would be quite a blow.

I'm so happy you recognized him as Zacharias! :) The mention of him leaving in HBP was really brief so I wasn't sure if it was clear enough or not.

I'm so glad this gave you a fresh perspective on the wonderful Fat Lady and that you enjoyed learning about (my version of) her history. It was a lot of fun to write, she really went through a lot of places and experiences to end up guarding the tower.

Thanks so much for the amazing reviews and for following this story! :D You really are too awesome! ♥


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Review #8, by Unwritten Curse Vindication

17th January 2014:
What can I type to adequately express how I'm feeling...

I am in awe. I loved every last word of this story and as soon as I type up this review I am immediately favoriting it so that I can read it again at some later date when I need a boost of inspiration. Truly, this is a stunning piece of art.

The only thing I feel is missing is the part when Sirius Black came and tore her portrait apart. I would've liked to see her courage in defending Gyffindor Tower, and the process in putting her portrait back together. I imagine she would've thought of Jeremiah in that instance. But I understand why it wasn't mentioned, as it wasn't vital to the story.

I did, however, love the bits with Dumbledore. I appreciated her noticing how kind he was, how he was the only person outside painted world that cared about her well-being. It was so sweet of him to move her to the Gryffindor Tower to give her purpose. I'm surprised he didn't tell her about her ancestry when she asked "Why me?" (which, by the way, her ancestors that walked through were terribly ungrateful and I wanted to slap their rotten heads) I got a bit teary-eyed when Dumbledore died and she mourned the loss of a good friend. I was more upset to see Dumbledore die than Jeremiah (which may just be because I love Dumbledore/am more attached to him because of the HP books). Both deaths were terribly upsetting, though, and I felt for the Fat Lady. What a lonely immortality she must live.

Thank you for bringing this character to life for me. I will never read the books/watch the movies the same again. Most importantly, I won't forget to mention the Fat Lady in my stories. I often write about Gryffindor characters but I forget about the Fat Lady. That won't be happening any more.

I'm so glad I jumped on board for this Review Swap. It has been one of my favorites.

-- Gina

Author's Response: Hi there! :)

Thank you so much for all the reviews and for liking the story! :) It's really wonderful to hear how much you liked it, and that you called it a piece of art- that seems oddly appropriate considering the subject. :)

I think you're right- I was going to add in that scene but wasn't quite sure how to tie it in. I might try and work in some mentions of it- thanks for your feedback! :)

It's great that you liked Dumbledore! I imagined he would have made quite the mark on Hogwarts and its inhabitants. I'm not sure if Dumbledore knew about her being a descendant of Hufflepuff (or a portrait of one), but he saw her as an individual with certain skills and a need to have a purpose. :) Haha, they were awful eh? And yes, Dumbledore's death is always painful, always the end of an era. :( Yes, she does live a very lonely life.

Thank you! :) I'd glad you liked it, and it's been really lovely reading your thoughts on each chapter. I'm glad you won't forget about the Fat Lady- that's just wonderful to hear! :)

Thank you so much for all the amazing reviews and support! :D ♥


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Review #9, by Unwritten Curse Sensation

17th January 2014:
I am so in love with this story. Ah! The details! Not a single detail is extraneous nor forgotten. I don't even know what else I can say at this point.

Had you researched magic portraits before writing this, or is this your imagination of what it's like to travel from portrait to portrait? Either way, I doesn't really matter, because I didn't question for a second whether or not it was canon.

I'm so glad the Fat Lady has a friend in Violet. Oh, and the scene(s) with Sir Cadogen were just brilliant. He is so perfectly characterized here--and I loved the bit about him promising to bring her the heads of the men he slays in his quest to find her husband. Ha! He's such a silly character and I'm so glad he was brought into this fic. He really deserves to have more written of him.

The ending... Ah! I actually laughed out loud (from relief/happiness) when the Headmaster said "A happy ending at last." How adorably noble of him to care about the lives of those within the portraits. It shows intelligence and empathy (this is Dippet, correct?), which contrasts nicely with the crassness of Professor Nott earlier.

Just... everything. Everything about this is pure gold. I usually try to bring some CC to the table, but I just can't. I just want to squee forever.

-- Gina

Author's Response: Hi again! :D)

Ah, thank you so much! ♥ This review is really amazing, it's wonderful to hear how you like the story.

I did some research from the posts on Pottermore about the portraits, which was quite helpful! For how they travel between the portraits, I just sort of made it up. :P It seemed to make sense, and I especially liked the idea of having these amazing and intriguing backgrounds but not being able to go beyond the foreground of the paintings.

I'm glad too! She definitely needs a friend. Haha, I'm so happy you thought Sir Cadogan was well characterized. :P I loved writing him, he's just such an odd little man. I'm glad you found him funny and silly - I wish there were more stories about him as well.

I'm glad you liked the young man in the office, and how kind he was! :) He is a lot more sensitive and caring than Nott, who was a pretty horrible character.

Thank you so much for all this amazing squee-ing! :D I really did love writing this story so getting your lovely feedback is just beyond wonderful. Thanks so much for the review! :D


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Review #10, by Unwritten Curse Creation

17th January 2014:
Oh my word. I am smitten.

This story is so unique! I immediately knew I had to read it as soon as I saw it was about the Fat Lady, because I'd never seen anything quite like it. And I am SO glad I did. I love love love anything written about this particular era, and the period details are just perfect. Not only have you done your research, you present the details in such a delightful way. Your writing is truly beautiful. I particularly liked this line: "A poet who lived long ago, he explained, claimed to memorialize his lover through ink and parchment, embodying the loverís memory in poetry to defeat the curse of time and keep the loverís beauty immortal." It's a beautiful sentiment and so craftily worded. I am envious of your talent.

And OH such creativity! I love the notion that only the portraits painted by the most skilled hands and the most expensive materials are able to move and speak. And I thoroughly enjoyed the idea that traveling from portrait to portrait could be dangerous (the story of the dragon was genius).

And the characters themselves! It's so ironic that the portraits seem more alive than the characters themselves, who are so wrapped up in unnecessary wigs and gowns for balls and treats and entirely frivolous things. And the Fat Lady is in awe of a simple, golden cup. Though she is a painting of a living woman, she has a personality all her own. I thoroughly enjoyed that. Every detail fits in perfectly and adds to this world you have created--a world inside a world, I suppose you could say.

Brilliant. I absolutely have to read more.

--Gina

Author's Response: Hello :)

Wow, this review and the others you left me are just amazing. Thank you!

I'm glad you found it unique- that's just how I felt a story about the Fat Lady should be. I love this era too, so I'm really pleased to hear you thought I did it justice. It's so lovely to hear you liked that line- it was supposed to be a reference to Shakespeare's sonnets to the young man. :)

It's wonderful to know you found the descriptions of life as a portrait to be creative. I really enjoyed imagining the portrait lore and how things would work. And yes! There would definitely be some dangers, and I'm pleased you liked the dragon- I couldn't resist the dragon.

I really like your observation on the portraits being more alive than the characters- it's entirely true. The Lady and Jeremiah are far more virtuous and good than their real-life counterparts, in my opinion. I wanted her to be similar yet separate from the true Lady, and it's lovely to know you liked learning about her world.

Thank you so much for this very thoughtful and wonderful review! It was a real pleasure to read. :)


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Review #11, by toomanycurls Sensation

16th January 2014:
Hello!! I wanted to see your new chapters on this. ^_^

I love how you brush through bits of history with the painting. Taking history and viewing it through, not just a wizard's eyes, but that of a painting is just genious. I even like how you address industrialization with stating they'd never use factory made goods.

It had to be surreal for her to see the person she was painted after pass away. Though, it was clear she felt a bit disconnected from her emotionally. It was beyond sweet that the Fat Lady and Jerimiah felt so close to one another.

Ah! It's the cup!! I suspected it was the Smiths (who ended up with the cup and locket) that the story was about.

oh it's so sad Jeremiah was separated from the Fat Lady. :( Especially given how fond they were of each other.

I do think she'll at least have plenty of company at Hogwarts. Oh but she still pines for Jeremiah. *sigh*

Sir Cadogan had to be a bit of a shock to run into. The entire castle seems a bit overwhelming. I do think it's quite quixotic of Sir Cadogan to try to find Jeremiah. Oh it is just heart warming that the other portraits are willing to help her stay in touch with Jeremiah.

You do such a wonderful job giving depth and richness to these portraits. I also love your banner!

-Rose

Author's Response: Hello! :) Yay, I'm glad you wanted to come back!

I'm glad you liked the historical references, I really liked imagining the era and how the wizards might have been involved! Ah, you caught that little detail about the factories! :)

Yes, I imagine it would be a little disconcerting and upsetting. I think she was a little emotionally attached to the original fat lady, even if the lady didn't care much about her personally of course. I'm glad you find them sweet together!

Hehe, good catch there! :)

I know! :( I feel awful for splitting them up, but they don't have much control over their own existences unfortunately. And she'll definitely still pine for Jeremiah- he's the love of her life, and for both of them at least there isn't anybody else out there.

Haha yes! I think I would be slightly alarmed to run into Sir Cadogan with all his extreme behaviour. It was a little unrealistic of Cadogan, but he did succeed- well, sort of. He takes his quests very seriously. :P

Thanks so much for the amazing review, Rose! :D I really appreciate it! And yes, that banner is just breathtaking. Ande is just too talented! ♥


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Review #12, by Rumpelstiltskin Vindication

16th January 2014:
Hello!

Here I was, already to sit down and review The Fall of the Town, when I noticed that this had a brand spanking new chapter!

It is strange to think about the war happening from the portrait's perspectives. While it is occurring, and they have knowledge of it, they aren't directly as affected by it like the others are. It makes sense, that they would be able to distance themselves. Although they exist within the world, and are able to interact to a certain degree with it, they are more directly effected by their own little world. It's also odd to think about the significance of their world, and how to measure it. In a way, it is just as significant as the outside world, to them at least. They have the ability to love and form friendships and *live*.

That brings me to this: oh my goodness Jeremiah's dead! That's absolutely devastating! It seems, to the wizarding world, the life of a figure in a portrait is much less significant than the life of a non-painted living person. Of course they would save the people within and leave the paintings behind to burn, if given the choice between the two. Yet, the pain that they feel, at least on an emotional level, is just as real as any other person. Poor Fat Lady.

I really like the concept of the intelligence level of the portrait's being directly related to the artist's skill. In the fabricated world of living, speaking portraits, that makes sense. As does the idea that the portraits each serve a certain purpose. Her lack of purpose, and dwelling upon it, in combination with her loss, is really really heartbreaking!

Then there was Dumbldore's death, and again the Fat Lady mourned! "With Dumbledore dead, the world would surely fall"--this line is absolutely perfect! I'm sure, at the time, that same feeling was mutual among the wizarding community.

This story was so awesome!! I loved it so much, and I'm sure you'll do spectacularly in your challenge! How could you not? You created a breathtaking back story for the Fat Lady!

Awesome!

-Rumpel

Author's Response: Hi Rumpel! :D

Thanks so much! I've been so excited to read people's thoughts on this final chapter.

It is strange! While the wizards are removed from the war to an extent, the portraits are even farther away. It is like the portraits have their own world within a world, but it's also quite limited and doesn't give them very much control. As far as they know, they're alive and have the same emotions as anybody, but no people beyond the frames would think to see it that way (though Dumbledore might try).

I know. :( I was so sad to do this, but it needed to happen for the story's sake. The death of a portrait, to the people beyond the portrait, doesn't matter beyond the loss of its financial value, so nobody really cares about losing Jeremiah. For the Fat Lady, though, of course it's so devastating and painful, just like any other person who had been separated from the one they loved forever. Gah, I'm reliving it all by typing this out, I feel so sad for her!

I'm glad you liked that explanation of how portraits exist! I thought it fit well in an odd sort of way. When she finds a purpose, she's able to move forward with her life, just like any other person, though of course she'll never forget Jeremiah.

Yes! Dumbledore's death would be very hard on her since she'd known him so long, and associated him with care and safety. She definitely embodies what most people would be feeling at the time.

Thank you so much for reading, reviewing, and liking this story! :D I absolutely loved writing it, and reading your reviews was just so wonderful. :) Thank you! :D


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Review #13, by Augurey Pleur Creation

15th January 2014:
Hi there. I'm here to swap reviews with you.

I must first say that I'm really impressed. But before I go on and praise you, I have to get one little thing out of the way. I saw a couple of run-on sentences that I found to be distracting. But this is more of my personal preference than a real critique!

I love the way you write. (I'm a little jealous.) I feel like you have this older style of writing that isn't really used much any more. It's not obvious, but it creeps through here and there. What I enjoyed most about the narrative is that it's quite refined and elegant, without being "stuffy". I'm not sure if I'm explaining this right. I suppose I found that there was a poetic feel to your tone, but it was not at all "flowery". I'm not sure how easy it was to accomplish that, but it sounded effortless!

My second favourite thing about this story was the originality of the plot. From what I see so far, you are actually writing a story about magic. You're taking your time to explain some of the rules that were never taught to us. :) I do find it very interesting that you made her character so different form her real-life counterpart. (I always imagined them being somewhat like an incomplete reflection.)

All in all, great job! I have added this to my reading list!:D

Author's Response: Hello! :)

Thank you! I'm glad you liked the story. I'll definitely have to go back and check for run-on sentences- it's definitely one of my weak points. :P

It's really wonderful to hear you like my writing style and the way you described it: poetic, but not flowery. That's just what I was hoping for. Honestly that style comes quite naturally to me because I quite like it, so I'm glad you enjoyed it as well.

Thank you! I love Harry Potter lore and getting to invent and play in the world of magic was really enjoyable. I love how you explained it as an incomplete reflection! I imagined that the Lady would feel quite separate from the original person.

Thanks so much for the wonderful review! :) I really appreciate all your lovely words.


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Review #14, by marauderfan Sensation

15th January 2014:
I love the details of history you've put into this story (and really, all of your stories) - that just makes it so much more alive, and really sets the scene so well. Hah, I love the idea that Jack the Ripper was a vampire, lol.

Jeremiah and the Lady are an adorable couple, I love the idea of them travelling to other paintings together and sometimes even causing mischief there, like getting drunk at the painting of the Last Supper, haha. It was so sad when they were separated, though, because they were auctioned off and sent to different homes. Sad :(

she wept dry tears of paint and plaster - that's beautiful. I love your word choice.

The background to the characters is so great too - Violet is mentioned like 3 times in the books and here she has a whole history, a personality - it's really quite cool. I like how, similarly to the Fat Lady herself, Violet's portrait is a lot kinder than the real thing! And speaking of personality, I love what you've done with the Fat Lady herself. You didn't even give her a name - she's just "the Lady" - but it doesn't feel like a name is lacking. The anonymity works and kind of reminds the reader that she is a portrait, not a person - she is static as the world changes. I don't know if I'm making sense at all, but I think it's a fascinating way to write a character!

It's cool how you've described walking between the portraits on the various levels of Hogwarts castle - I'd always wondered what that was like. Ooh, Sir Cadogan! HAhaha, you've characterised him perfectly and that was such a fun scene.

Aw, the ending of this chapter is adorable. I laughed that Jeremiah had stolen parchment from a scribe writing the Magna Carta :D Seriously the detail and the art you put into this is so great. The story itself is very artistic. This is such a cool story and so unique - since for some reason I hadn't done so before, I've favourited it and am eagerly awaiting the next chapter. :)

Author's Response: Hello! :D

Thanks so much! You know how I love the history. :P It was quite fun imagining what the Lady might have heard about the world outside and what wizards would think about Muggle affairs. Haha I thought it sort of made sense, especially with his mysterious appearance being orchestrated by the Ministry!

Aw, I'm so happy you like them! I think they're just adorable, and imagining their antics made me laugh. I know, it really wasn't fair for them. :( But life isn't fair for portraits here, haha.

I love that line too! :) Thanks for picking it out!

I really liked coming up with Violet's history and how she and the Fat Lady portrait might have met. I wanted to make the portraits different from their real person selves, since they are just imitations which gives them room to form their own personalities. I like your analysis of how she's static and doesn't have a true identity in the official sense of the term. :)

Yes! I sort of went a little creative imagining what it might be like. :P I'm glad you liked it, hopefully it was realistic in the sense that it is make-believe. I just couldn't resist putting in Sir Cadogan- he's a blast! :D

Haha, for as fancy as Jeremiah is, he's still got a bit of a mischievous streak! I'm glad you found the story artistic, that's just wonderful! :) I'm so glad you like it, thank you for the fantastic review! :D


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Review #15, by Rumpelstiltskin Sensation

14th January 2014:
Hello!

I couldn't decide between this and The Fall of the Town, so I picked one randomly, figuring that I could always get back to the other one at a different time :D!

Just...gah! You and the story-telling! Someday, when/if I have children, I'm going to hire you to write bedtime stories for me to read to them! Er...they may be dark but, hey, if somebody like me is ever going to be a mother, I highly doubt that my offspring will be shrouded from dark literature. While it makes me slightly jealous, I can't help but marvel at the elegant descriptors and entertaining story-lines.

I love the innocent romance between Jeremiah and the Fat Lady. Their immortal fondness that has the capability to transcend time and place truly has to be one of the best love stories ever told. Then, to be torn away from him in such a way, made my heart break! That's absolutely anguishing to hear Jeremiah call out for her as she's taken away. Having a soul, the portraits have emotions, revealed by the grief they felt and then again by love. Yet, they're so easily removed from their location, from friends and loved ones, by the outside world... okay, I'm going to cry.

I agree with Violet, she simply has to find a way to be reunited with Jeremiah! She has to. Oh! Sir Cadogan! If anybody can help, it will be the eccentric knight! Even though they are technically reunited, still kept separated from the limitations on traveling between certain portraits, it's almost too far away for cause for a happy ending. Instead, it's bitter-sweet, but at least they can communicate with one another, which was more than they could previously. Still, like I said, it's so bitter-sweet, and remains heart-breaking really.

I was way too into this story, which means that you did a fantastic job. Just...gah (because any coherent words that I can formulate into sentences don't seem to be powerful enough)! It was beautiful and tragic, and I don't want it to end!

-Rumpel

Author's Response: Hola! :)

I'm glad you picked this one! :) I do love it so. TFOTT (such a weird acronym) will always be around.

I would love to write bedtime stories for your potential future children! :P I think it's good to have dark stories, de-sensitive them early, haha. I'm so happy you like my writing style and storytelling here, it really means a lot!

Aw, I'm so glad you like their sweet romance! I love writing it, they're so genuine and pure together. I'm glad you think it's a great love story! I know, I felt so awful for doing that and tearing them apart like that. It's so unfair, but they're portraits, and portraits aren't considered people to the wizards so their opinions don't matter. Oh no, don't cry! :(

I love Sir Cadogan! Yes, this isn't quite a happy ending, and quite bittersweet as you said. They really have no chance of a true solution unless they get moved to the same place, which is very unfair.

Gah, this review! ♥ Thank you so much for the beautiful review, I'm ever so honoured that you like the story! :D


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Review #16, by maraudertimes Sensation

14th January 2014:
Dude. DUDE! I may or may not be slightly hopped up on several cups of coffee, and you've made me go through an emotional roller coaster!

Okay, lets start at the beginning!

Did you just mention Jack the Ripper? Arshdfkgjd! I'm kind of obsessed with people like him (ex. Ted Bundy), so OMG! It's so awesome, because I can definitely tell you're a history nerd, since your story *completely* fits the era it was written in down to a tee! T? Tee? Oh well...

Then there was this part: "As long as you are near to me, my dear fellow and husband, I shall be content as a lamb." OHMYMERLIN THAT's So CUTE! I just can't! You've made me ship paintings. PAINTINGS! AS IN PAINTINGS! I DON'T EVEN KNOW HOW THIS HAPPENED, BUT I DON'T THINK I'm COMPLAINING!

Well of course Zizi took the cup. I didn't expect her to do anything less! But it's Hufflepuff's cup, so I wonder if you're going to elaborate on that somehow in later chapters... Hmmm ;)

And just after you made me ship paintings, this happened: "As the large canvases descended over her frame, wrapping her world in darkness for the second time since her creation, the last thing she heard was Jeremiah's voice growing with increased panic and undeniable love. She buried her face in the sleeve of her gown and wept dry tears of paint and plaster."

Nope, I can't. I can't. You just made me ship two paintings, AND THEN YOU RIPPED THEM APART! I can't... I'm crying. I really am (although that *might* be the coffee...)

SIR CADOGAN!

Ooh, is this going to end up like they secretly pass notes to each other but then stuff happens and they can't or something? I'm not making sense, am I?

Okay, to sum it up: this was awesome! I'm super excited for what comes next because Jeremiah and the Fat Lady are sooo cute!!! You are amazing at this and the fact that you're an English major/nerd comes across amazingly clearly - but in the best way possible!

Amazing job and I can't wait to see what comes next! :D
Lo :D

Author's Response: Hello! :D

Haha, this review is so awesome and no less because of the coffee. :P

Yes!! Good job picking him out there! :) I'm glad you approve of my nerdiness seeping through into the story, it was a blast to imagine what the Lady might have picked up on during the era. I went on a Jack the Ripper tour once when I was in London and honestly had nightmares for days but I love tying in creepy things like this to the story!

Yay for shipping paintings!!! :D Don't worry, it's totally normal, I ship them too. ♥

Haha yes, the cup does play a little role in the Lady's story! I'm glad you were expecting Zizi to take the cup, it was very in character. :P

I'm sorry. :( It broke my heart too! But being a painting couple is far more difficult than being a human couple, in my view, since they have no control over what happens to them! It's quite sad.

Sir Cadogan! I lurve him, he just had to make an appearance. I will never forgive his being left out of the films.

Thank you so much for this AMAZING review!!! :D I'm so thrilled you like the story and I really loved reading all your thoughts and reactions and approving of my nerdiness! :) Thank so much! :)


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Review #17, by maraudertimes Creation

11th January 2014:
This is really cool! I never thought of how the Fat Lady was created, but you've created such a deep back story for her that I never could have imagined.

I absolutely loved the start that detailed how she was made, and the different details in her painting. Those made it seem as if the painting truly was coming to life - as it was.

Also, the sweet nature of the Fat Lady painting in contrast to the real one was quite striking. Of course, a painting usually has a subject, but I never thought of the Fat Lady as being the portrait of an actual woman - especially one such as the true Fat Lady. They are very different, but I feel as if the portrait is the nicer and sweeter of the two.

I also loved Jeremiah and how he seems utterly infatuated with the Fat Lady portrait. It seems very believable seeing as he has spent years watching his 'person' being in love with the 'person' Fat Lady, and he probably fell in love with 'person' Fat Lady, so to see him fawn over the real own was quite sweet.

I also loved your attention to detail of the era. In that time I'm pretty sure a large body demonstrated quite a large sum of money to your name, so that was very nice to see.

I absolutely loved the description in this piece and I think this is definitely one of the most original and surprising pieces I've ever had the pleasure to read on this site. You've done a wonderful job with your characters and I think that you will be able to make this story so much more than anything I've ever read.

This was a beautiful and amazing piece! You executed it perfectly, so great job!
Lo:)

Author's Response: Hello! :)

I'm glad you liked it! I had a lot of fun imagining what it might be like to be created as a portrait and how that experience could be described.

Ah, I wanted to make the portrait and real life counterpart have their distinct personalities. I enjoyed coming up with the original Fat Lady as well and how obnoxious she was. I read, I think on Pottermore, that portraits could act like their subjects if they were instructed to, but that they weren't necessarily copies of them so that was fun to explore.

Jeremiah! :) He was one of my favourite parts of writing this story. I'm glad you liked their relationship, I felt that he was waiting for her for a long time and plus they turned out to be quite compatible.

Thanks! :) I like writing in historical periods so I'm glad you found it realistic.

Aw, that's so lovely to hear! I'm really pleased you found it original and surprising, that's just what I hoped for. I really loved writing this story so it's just fantastic to have people respond to it positively.

Thanks for the wonderful review! :D


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Review #18, by ThestralPrincess Creation

11th January 2014:
This is a truely marvelous chapter, far and beyond what I was expecting. You've really taken the theme and explored it well, genuinely placing yourself in the position of the painting.

Particularly your development of the characters is wonderful. I love how to begin with she can't even see. You've captured perfectly the ability to show what these characters are like rather then describing them, which is a fantastic skill to have in writing.

I love the way the Fat Lady portrait describes everything around her and her childlike curiosity as though she actually werea child introduced to the world for the first time.

I look forward to reading the other chapters and seeing how you develop the Fat Lady. :)

Author's Response: Hello! :)

Wow, thank you so much! I absolutely loved writing this, and I'm so pleased you enjoyed it and felt the story connected with the character.

I'm so pleased you liked her creation and how it started with her senses coming alive. It was quite odd to write but I really liked how it turned out. :) Being able to show and not tell in a story is a huge compliment, so thank you!

She is very childlike! After all, she did just begin to exist and so I imagined her as being very confused and curious.

Thanks so much for coming up with the challenge, and for this lovely review! The next chapter is in the queue. :)


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Review #19, by toomanycurls Creation

10th January 2014:
I'm really psyched to read this. Just the poetic prose in the summary made me feel swept up in your words.

Your description in the intro is divine. I love how you touch on the paintings having the soul of the subject. I mean, it seems like a clear way for paintings to take on the characteristics and possess the knowledge of a deceased subject. Is Violet the friend the Fat Lady visits?

I love how you describe the Fat Lady getting her eyes and taking in her first views of the world. The way you describe the painter from up close is so vivid that it painted a perfect image in my mind.

The lady's dismissive attitude towards the painting is interesting to me. Given how legendary the painting becomes it's a bit ironic at her first reception into the world.

The idea that there's more to the painting than is immediately visible is quite brilliant. It makes the whole eternity in a frame sound much better. Ooh, the part outside the frame sounds dreadful yet such an adventure to traverse. Her first trip to another portrait is enough to frighten anyone like that. Jeremiah sounds like interesting company. I like the idea of her being at the center of attention in a grand dining room.

It does seem that the painters have quite a bit on their shoulders (hands rather) when they take to paint a witch or wizard. I wouldn't want to be the person whose hand slipped and caused an eternal mark on someone's visage.

Their tour of neighboring paintings sounded like a wonderful treat. I know I enjoyed reading it. :D It just makes life as a portrait so much more fulfilling - being able to visit such far off landscapes and meet the various people that might be in them.

I am in love with this story. Jeremiah is so sweet the the Fat Lady is so... new, trying to find her way, I don't know but it's wonderful!

Author's Response: Hello!

Wow, thanks so much for this glowing review! I loved writing it and the poetic prose as you put it, it felt very fitting for the era.

I'm glad you liked the idea of paintings having souls, even if their personalities do sometimes differ from the person they were inspired by. The whole thing is really confusing, but I liked coming up with some portrait lore. :) And yes, that's a very good assumption about Violet!

I'm happy to hear it felt vivid and visual, I felt that those first details and sights would stay in her mind and be very striking.

Yes, it is a rather ironic moment! The painting herself isn't really important to the Lady- she only cares about herself and looking admirable to others.

Haha, I'm glad you found it sound more interesting and better to be in a frame! I thought it must be a very odd existence and they would get bored and restless eventually. It is an adventure to travel to the other paintings, and some of them have the possibility of being quite dangerous!

Yes! The art of painting a portrait such as these living ones would be very difficult and costly, in my view of it. The painters have to be the best of the best, and it would be quite stressful to be commissioned by the rich and fabulous to get things just right.

I thought traveling would be fun too! It was entertaining for me to imagine the various paintings which might be in the house and what the lady and Jeremiah would think of them. There is a lot to see even within the frames.

I'm so happy you like the story, yay! :) Thanks so much for the amazing review!


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Review #20, by marauderfan Creation

10th January 2014:
For our review swap!

I love the way this starts out - how she catches pieces of conversation as soon as her ears are painted, then when the artist modifies them she can't hear anymore. How odd it must be, to be a painting in the process of being painted haha. (I laughed out loud that the Fat Lady's first view of the world was the painter's nostril hair.) If I'm not wrong, is that the same Violet who later becomes friends with the Fat Lady? Well, I guess it's just the name I have to go on - could be just a coincidence. :p

Hufflepuff's cup?! The Fat Lady isn't some relative of that woman in HBP, is she? Hmm, you are very tricky ;) (also how ironic would that be if the woman who later guards the entrance to Gryffindor Tower is actually a descendant of Hufflepuff.) Anyway, I love the way you describe the world inside and outside the frame. As viewers from the outside we can't see all that's inside the frame, but from the inside there would be so much more to see, and I love how you explored that in here.

I felt like I was going on a little adventure there as well, travelling between the paintings with the Fat Lady and Jeremiah, seeing all the different paintings from the inside! I love the part about the dragon drying off Jeremiah's hat, haha. I also love the detail about the original painter making a mistake, and how that blemish remains on the subject.

What's really interesting is how (at least for now) the painted subjects don't seem to have the personality of their real-life (well not real, but real in the story) counterparts. They are similar in appearance but that seems to be all, at least for now.

By the way, I did notice one typo in there which says "feat" instead of "feet" when describing the cherubs on the ceiling.

Anyway, this is such an original idea for a story and I really loved the first chapter! I will definitely be back for more - you are an excellent writer :D

Author's Response: Hello!

I loved writing the beginning and I'm so happy you enjoyed that part. I agree, it would be so confusing, especially since she is quite intelligent and knows that there is something going on. Haha, yes, I imagine seeing nostril hair would be quite disturbing. :P Hehe, there are no coincidences in writing (well, maybe there are in some stories, but in this story most coincidences usually mean something!).

You're so clever! :) Yes, there is something going on with the cup, and it would be quite ironic indeed. I'm pleased you liked the contrasts with seeing inside and outside the frame and what that would be like, I had a lot of fun imagining it!

I wish I could wander around in the portraits! It would be a great deal of exciting. Haha, I thought the dragon was funny as well. I figured that the portraits would be quite delicate and that little mistakes would mess with their outer and inner selves, so having a blemish would be more problematic to fix than it seems.

You're right! When I was researching the portraits it said (on Pottermore I believe) that the portraits can be instructed by their counterparts to act and be certain ways, but they aren't emotional copies of them. So I figured that while the lady can act like the Fat Lady, she's not automatically given the same personality. It's all very complex and odd!

Thanks, I'll fix that right away! :) I've been a great victim of homophones recently for some reason!

Thanks so much for the amazing review, as always! :) I really appreciate your lovely feedback! ♥


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Review #21, by Rumpelstiltskin Creation

10th January 2014:
Swapping!

The function of the magical portraits in Hogwarts (and, I assume, elsewhere) is definitely an interesting mystery. I love the extent you went in (beautifully) describing the creation process of the paintings. The idea of the objects gaining a soul, bringing them to life, was interesting and exquisitely executed (in my opinion).

The birth of the Fat Lady was, for lack of better words, adorable. Jeremiah is really endearing in his personality. His demeanor makes me smile and I think I especially love how kind he is. Their journey around the house, visiting the other paintings was extremely entertaining.

I love the society established within the paintings most of all, I think. As you wrote, they each have their own roles to play, and that idea alone is quite fun! It reminds me of parallel dimensions of reality, where there's the world in which we exist, and then there's the world in which the people in the portraits exist. It's really, really, fascinating!

Anyway, I thought this was overall brilliant! Awesome job!

-Rumpel

Author's Response: Hello! :)

Yes, I agree! I find how they work and how animated they are so interesting, especially since many of them seem to have firm personalities. I'm glad you liked the creation process, I enjoyed writing it and imagining how confusing and wondrous it would be to be born fully formed and cognitive, but without having anything to base your identity around besides the subject who you were painted as. So I really enjoyed writing that, and it's wonderful to know you liked how it was written.

Aw! I'm happy you thought so! I'm really pleased to hear you liked Jeremiah, he is very kind and loves the lady unconditionally which she really needs at the moment. I'm glad you liked the journey, I absolutely loved imagining how the house might look from the frames and all the odd characters in there. :P

It's great to hear you liked the relationships between the paintings and the explanations of their roles in the house. It was indeed very fun to write. :) That's an interesting point about parallel dimensions, and I suppose it is a little like that: the two worlds observe one another and are beside each other, but never actually intersect properly.

Thanks for the amazing review! :D


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