Reading Reviews for ( [ { final destination } ] )
  
16 Reviews Found

Review #1, by Slytherin Secret Santa the end

22nd December 2013:
This. Was. Intense. And sad. Poor Snape. So confused and alone and dead. I don't know why I never found this story during the House Cup, but I am glad I found it now. (And not just because Snape is my most favorite character and the bestest Head of House ever!). This is such a unique and original take on the challenge! You really captured the intensity of the confusing mess of emotions that Snape must have been feeling knowing that he was dead. The flashback through his life was heartbreaking, but I love how you ended it and brought it all together.
"I saved him (for her; I am here.)"
Powerful. Brilliant. I love it! Super great job!!

Love,
SSS

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Review #2, by Cleopatraa the end

16th July 2013:
As I also have written a piece for this and your summary intrigued me, I had to read this. I'm not a Severus Snape fan, but this was really a great piece. It was so sad and emotional. Your descriptions and the writing style you used were extremely well done. Well done! This was a great and creative entry!

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Review #3, by randomwriter the end

15th July 2013:
Hi Bengali-ness!! :)
I remember from the live stream :P
Sorryy, I'm a little hyper right now.
So, I'll just get on with the review.
I think that this was one of those really beautiful stories that you take a while to figure out. When you finally do figure it out, you've reached the end and are yearning for more.
The use of parenthesis is very interesting. I haven't seen them being used like this very often. I really enjoyed it, especially the little notes that you've added. It really feels like you've done a great job of figuring our Snape's thoughts and getting into his head.
Good job! :)

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Review #4, by MrsJaydeMalfoy the end

13th July 2013:
This is so sad and heart-wrenching. I think you did an excellent job of conveying emotions here!

Thoughts can be a bit chaotic and hectic and random, and I loved that you allowed us to see Snape's thoughts. It made it so realistic and that much more heartbreaking.

I think my favorite line was when he thought that he wasn't sure if it was his blood or someone else's that he was afraid of spilling. And I found it believable that he would blame himself for Lily's death.

All in all, this is a wonderfully heart-wrenching piece. Well done!

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Review #5, by Roots in Water the end

13th July 2013:
Hello there!

Wow- what an interesting story! I really liked the writing style that you used; the brackets and clarifications and little notes really felt like Snape's mind because Snape has always seemed very logical and orderly and of course his mind would follow the same path.

I think that you did a great job with your description as well. Not only does the halting, somewhat scattered approach really suit the atmosphere of the story (really create the atmosphere of the story), it also appears like what I imagine to be the fog you find yourself in after death. It really helped to cement the idea that Snape is now dead, and he is moving forwards, towards the afterlife.

The sprinkling of his memories and the mentions of the woman - of Lily? - were also very well done. Everyone guesses that you re-experience your life in flashbacks after you die and Lily was arguably the most important person in his life. What I am really intrigued by is the woman. Is she Lily? Is she a figure representing Death? Is she Death herself? Or is she more simply a guide to help people reach the afterlife?

All in all, I really enjoyed this story. The style, the flow, the characterization- they all fit together fantastically and created a story that was a pleasure to read. I think that you found a really clever take on the theme of "travel" and I'm glad that you wrote this piece. You did a great job with it! :D

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Review #6, by BluebirdBrigade the end

13th July 2013:
Hey Wist! Here for the HC review-a-thon!

I think it's completely clear that this entry was incredibly creating and definitely one of the most interesting stories I've read all day. I love the way you used the brackets and it was almost like he was having an overload of information. It sounds almost like when Sherlock in the BBC version goes to his mind palace because details were constantly given bracketed information and I LOVED IT.

It made it all quite haunting too, almost sad and I think, this might just be a totally out there idea, but the main character does sound a little mad as if his mind is reeling and he can't quite make sense of things because there is such an overload of information and he can't decipher the information that isn't needed from what is. I dunno, that's just me. :P

I think partly one of the reasons I liked your story so much was because I was constantly trying to figure out the mysterious way you were writing it. It was really beautifully crafted and I really enjoyed reading this. There wasn't a single grammatical or spelling error that I saw and you really captivated me with your very clinical descriptions. Really interesting and creative entry!

Maz x

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Review #7, by ohmymerlin the end

13th July 2013:
Hi!

Okay firstly, I commend you for the use of all the different parentheses! I've never seen that before! It was done so well, and when I first read the title I kept thinking, "That's a lot of parentheses! It seems a bit over-the-top!"

But now that I've read it, it makes so much sense and it makes it such an effective one-shot!

The way you wrote all the tiny parts, it was almost as if Snape was mechanical and it just made it so broken and fragmented and wow!

(Also, I loved the banner on this! It suits the story perfectly!)

This piece is truly brilliant, I hardly have any words because it's just SO AMAZING! I'm so amazed at the talent you have!

Seriously, I am in awe of this one-shot, it's just so fantastic and perfect and amazing and WOAH.

I loved all the science-y bits you added in, it just made it less emotional and really separated us from him, which is a real talent to have!

Anyway, I absolutely adored this one-shot! It's one of my favourites that I've read so far!

Awesome job on it!

10/10

- Kayla. :D

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Review #8, by purplepotter77 the end

13th July 2013:
Here for the House Cup review-a-thon!

This story was so interesting. I've never seen a fic with all the ([{}]) things before, and I think that they really added to the story without distracting too much from it. I loved the way you've constructed Snape's world and all the imagery you've used. It almost seems like a sort of dream world or something, which seems to fit in with the themes of travel and death in this story. It was really great to take a peak into Snape's mind (I've never read a story in his point of view before).

The stuff in the brackets seemed to add more meaning to the story for me, such as the color psychology stuff. I also love how Snape revisits a lot of important memories in his lifetime, and it sort of reminds me of how people say that when you die, your life flashes before your eyes.

Overall, this was such a lovely, beautiful one-shot and was an absolute pleasure to read! :)

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Review #9, by academica the end

13th July 2013:
Hello!

Wow, this was really interesting. I love running across stream-of-consciousness style pieces like this. I loved the sense I got from the deconstructed, fleeting nature of Snape's thoughts; it was like the whole wealth of his mind collapsed in death and there was no rhyme or reason anymore. All parts of it flowed into one another. The detached way he examined everything he was observing and the way it bled into cruel, cold reality was really fascinating as it unfolded here.

Oh, and I love the notion there at the end about giving the Dark Lord to Lily. It makes sense as a final act of penitence on Snape's part, and it's a satisfying sort of resolution for the three of them.

One thing I just wanted to mention is that you might need to credit "I open at the close" like you did with the other line you quoted. I don't know if you're a TA or if you use the queue, but I know it can be easy for me to almost forget things like that once I really get into the flow of a chapter.

Nice work!

Amanda
Ravenclaw
House Cup 2013


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Review #10, by SilentConfession the end

13th July 2013:
Wisty!

What is this? What have you done?? I'm speechless because this whole thing is completely different and out there and I love it. It truly is an incredible piece of writing and i don't even know where to start with this review. I just want to flail about and hug the writing to pieces. Honestly. I don't even know why i like it so much, i'm speechless and that's not normal for me.

I loved the () [] {} bits of the story. How they all led to one another and brought the story in a circle and it was harsh. It was jagged and cut the story up. It stopped the flow of the story but somehow that really worked with this. Worked for Snape because the whole time I kept thinking how very much like Snape this whole thing is. How jagged, unclear, how harsh and it just fit perfectly with what you were trying to do. The self-loathing you have pervades the story completely. It seems like every remembrance, every thought is a regret, a mistake.

I loved the overall tone and the style of this. It made the theme and the emotion really prevalent. In a detached sort of manner. If that makes sense because i felt like this story was very based in reality that he was losing his reality and on this journey that was detached from anything we know and yet i still felt the story. You have an excellent use of imagery. The blue black of his veins, his bruises. Every word it seemed had a purpose and conveyed something to the readers. This is honestly something you should be proud of making. It's a great piece!

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Review #11, by nott theodore the end

13th July 2013:
Hello! I'm here reviewing for Gryffindor in the house cup :)

If I'm honest, at the beginning I was a bit confused about what was happening with the parenthesis, but as I continued reading I actually really enjoyed it. It would have been very easy for that to disrupt the flow of the story, but instead I think it helped; I found myself reading quickly, which kind of reflects Snape's chaotic state of mind in this story. It's a really creative and unusual style and I thought it was very original.

I'm happy to say that I knew that Snape was at King's Cross and boarding the train before you clarified it in your author's note! I actually loved the inclusion of that idea, that it's not an option which is just open to Harry but also to others, even if the others don't have the choice of returning to life. I'm pleased that he chose to board the train and go on.

I found myself feeling quite sorry for his character here. There's a current of self-loathing that runs through this story, and even though Snape did some terrible things in his life, he was also incredibly brave and did work on the side of good eventually, so it was quite upsetting to see how he hated himself because of it. Snape's definitely not my favourite character in the series, but I did feel a lot of sympathy for him reading this.

I loved the references to the red hair and the green eyes, and the constant thoughts of Lily. There was some lovely description and imagery in this one-shot as well.

I just saw one typo in this:
"what color her eyes (I am inclined to think they are green) is" -- her eyes...are

This was a really unique take on the travel theme and a great one-shot!

Sian :)

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Review #12, by DracoFerret11 the end

13th July 2013:
Hello there! This is DarkRose from Ravenclaw on the forums here to review for you for the House Cup 2013! :D So, let's go over things:

Plot: Well...I don't actually know quite what I read here. Let's start with style instead and come back to this.

Style: This was actually really cool. The way you wrote this had me breaking up my reading in my head and wondering just why Snape was thinking in this manner, but it worked somehow. It was really unconventional, but I think it was cool. Good job!

Plot: Now, plot! I love to think that Snape took the train. :) He definitely deserved to (even though I'm no Snape fan, sorry!). I think that this scene was very interesting and I loved that you worked in canon parts of Snape's story. Well done!

Characterization: I loved that Snape was self-loathing even though he turned out to be a rather good person. I felt really sorry for him, but I think your choices in characterization really worked.

Descriptions: I'm not quite sure if there were details within this story, but I actually don't feel that there need to be. I think the way you wrote it somehow showed what readers needed to see. I just hope that most everyone can understand the style and get the message from this.

Emotions: So sad! It wasn't something that wrenched at me, but understanding the underlying elements in this story made me sad. I liked that you worked in everything we know about Snape and his love for Lily and his choices and life. It really helped me feel for him in his final moments.

This was really cool and I think you did a great job. Good luck with the House Cup!

--Emily

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Review #13, by maskedmuggle the end

13th July 2013:
Hey!

This was something completely different, completely unusual but also so very unique and original! I really loved seeing what Snape's trip to King's Cross looked like, and his moving forward and taking the train.

Of course, I think your use of the brackets and parentheses was very interesting and creative and cool. I would've thought that they'd keep interrupting the flow of the story but I thought you used it in a way that actually really enhanced the story and made the whole situation seem so much more detached and further away from reality.

I think this was really well written and I enjoyed reading it! All the descriptions, and emotions were conveyed very powerfully as well :)

- Charlotte/maskedmuggle
House Cup 2013 Ravenclaw

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Review #14, by WhisperingBees the end

12th July 2013:
This was stunning. The words (an assembly of letters { meanings [beautiful] } ) in parenthesis were marvelous n.n They cut the flow, and created a jagged broken feeling, which was... outstanding. Impossible. Heart-wrenching. The creativity in your story honestly throws me over.

You've managed to create an entire universe in 1255 words (you can blame my word count tool if the count isn't exact). It's... beautiful. You've plunged us into a place where things are jagged, and sharp, and painful, yet soft, and misty, and dreamy. And we can walk right into it from the very first line, and be torn apart for having to leave it at the last line.

Your take on the House Cup's theme is flamboyant, and unique, it's a journey through one's life, in it's brightest, most magnificent parts, as well as in it's darkest hours.

The way you've constructed the story is simply hypnotizing, we start at the end, bounce back at the front and go round round the entire trip. Your story could be read backwards because it's a circle, and just like a circle it has no end. Wisty, you have managed to create a story that has no end, and I swear, those who can do that, can do absolutely anything, in anything.

The last sentence is sweet and shocking. "I reached the final destination" "I reach the final destination" this reinforces the feeling of the story that has no ending. The last line brings us to the end and brings us to the beginning. Beautiful.

Wisty, I beg you, don't you dare ever stop writing. Because if you can write like this as young as you are, I cannot fathom what you could spin into words when you earn more experience.

-June

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Review #15, by navyfail the end

12th July 2013:
Hey Wisty. I am Sama, here for the review-a-thon.

When I first clicked on this story I wasn't sure why there were brackets before and after 'final destination'. Now that I have read the story it all makes sense. The style that your wrote in is very unique and a change for me.

I really liked reading the parts where he starts realizing things like when he finds out he is dead. His reaction to that was very good(I don't know how to describe it. Good is not exactly descriptive. Maybe realistic?)And then he realizes he does not want to be alive. It is like he is remembering parts of what happened and he slowly decides what he wants and he doesn't want, if that makes sense.

"I open at the close."
"The bravest man I ever knew."When I read those parts, I squeed in my mind. Probably cause referencing to the books isn't always common(well, not exact lines).

Your figurative language is lovely and though a lot of your sentences seem short they are describe his emotions well(ex. "My cry dribbles in the air.","Days bleed on.").

All in all, this is a really nice one-shot. Very different from what I normally read in a positive way. I look forward to reading more from you(and yes that does mean I may stalk your author's page,jk).

~Sama

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Review #16, by AC_rules the end

12th July 2013:
dhiadhdohaoihofdhfodahf.

Wisty.

I LOVED this this was so arty and fabulous and can I HAVE IT PLEASE. How dare you say this is rubbish it is wonderful and I am in awe of all your talent and I genuinely think you're going to be a writing superstar and I'm like salivating over how glorious this is.

yrghdada. Okay I'm going to favourite this and possibly read it every morning. It's one of the best depictions of death I've ever read (and aint that a compliment) and it was just so so so so so so so so good so don't give me any of that 'rushed' nonsense.

Loved it. SO much.

Wow.

AC

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