Reading Reviews for Clash
234 Reviews Found

Review #1, by Lizzie Grieve

22nd July 2014:
This story gives me goosebumps every time I read it. It is so brilliantly crafted, so amazingly written. Your characters are intriguing, your descriptions flawless, your plot amazing. If you ever stop writing, the world will have lost a great deal of literary work they would have been better off with. You have a huge gift.

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Review #2, by Allison Grieve

20th July 2014:
This hurts me... but in a good way. Really love this! Congrats on one year, and thank you for updating. :)

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Review #3, by whykay Grieve

19th July 2014:
Whew. I love your style of writing - keeps the storyline totally unpredictable. I eagerly await your updates! Keep going!

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Review #4, by pikachewbites Grieve

18th July 2014:
Another great chapter! I love all the great character & relationship dynamics in this chapter, two in particular stood out for me: Albus & Rose, and Hugo & Scorpius. I got a bit of a romantic vibe from Albus but I could be reading too much into things since Albus rarely ever shows affection towards others & Rose has always been his constant in life even though she might not fully understand what's going through his mind. Nevertheless, it's nice seeing the softer side of Albus & knowing that Rose is finally breaking through that shell of his.

Nice job introducing the Hugo & Scorpius 'bromance'! It's good to see that Hugo can find company in another person other than his sister & in a way, it shows that Scorpius truly cares about Rose since he knows Hugo means a lot to her. Your depiction of the Silver Trio is definitely unique from other next gen stories even though it's still 'Albus & Scorpius are best friends while Rose is the cousin'. The power dynamics & personalities are so different from the rest, I love that your Scorpius isn't the typical cocky, Slytherin sex god.

I'm really intrigued to see how Rose is going to use her perceived position of power to her advantage.

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Review #5, by Pia Grieve

18th July 2014:

I love the way you make the story flow, it's really impressive, it's like seeing a painting come to life.

You make the readers, well at least me,feel what the characters are feeling, Albus' pain and confusion, Rose's grief and disappointment and another thing: compassion! I just want to hold them and say that everything is going to be alright, poor kids! :(

After the last chapter, I knew Albus was really afraid of losing control but I didn't know how close he actually is from it,it seems to me that those Three Hopeless Words are destroying Albus' control, without Harry and without ansewers, everything is starting to seem really pointless to him.

It is just my impression or Albus is trying to justify his actions to Rose, to make her understand, to share is pain ? I know he would never do something like that sober but it seems to me that some repressed part of him is asking for help...the question is: will the not high Albus actually accept help to fix him?

It's interesting: the "in control" Albus was terrifying but this "not so in control" version of him, that seems more human, it's actually more dangerous because the purpose is fading and the bloodlust is getting stronger!

The flashbacks were awsome, little Al was so lovely and Harry seemed like a man with a plan, a very twisted plan but not exactly an evil one, I suppose...

Also, I love Scorpius and Hugo's bromance already maybe you could extend it to Rose but with a little less "bro" if you know what I mean? ;)

I've been thinking about what Scorpius said about Rose having a lot more power than what she thinks but instead of politics I thought about cults, she would be the ideal cult leader if she was into that sort of thing!

I loved the song that you posted with the chatper it remind me that this week while I waited anxiously for the chapter to be up (it took a lot of time, the people from this site don't seem to know that I'm adicted to this story haha) listen to a song that make me think of Albus, I don't know if you know it but just check "wrong" by Depeche mode.

Happy First Birtday!! Wishing you and this story all the best!! :)

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Review #6, by Dirigible_Plums Grieve

18th July 2014:
A brilliant chapter as usual. I could ramble on about everything I like but I'm typing this on my phone and it's annoying -.- #thestruggle

I do have one question though. What's with the capitalising of words? I've been noticing it in the recent chapters and was wondering what triggered this new development

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Review #7, by AlexFan Fear

13th July 2014:
I can see why you had to cut some stuff out, this is the darkest thing that I've ever read. It's kind of scary to think that what you had to cut out was worse than this because this was pretty damn scary.

You could be some kind of horror novelist or something (and I would buy each and every one of your books just so you know).

I have such mixed feelings about all of the characters because you can't just shove them into good and bad boxes because they are so much more complex then that, they're human beings and human beings don't fit into good or bad boxes. There are times when I hate the Head and then ther are times where he shows that he does feel something towards Rose even if it is very little.

And there are times where I absolutely detest Albus and times like this chapter where he tries to protect Rose because he understands the things that she can't handle. If the Head knew about what Rose had to put up with with Albus, he wouldn't be surprised that his training hadn't broken her.

I don't know how you come up with such dark stuff, I feel like your mind might be a terrifying but absolutely fascinating place to explore. Your imagination has no bounds honestly, but I suppose when it comes to the dark, there really isn't a limit to just how twisted you can make things.

The most horrifying part for me personally was when the Other had Rose pinned against that tombstone and then he . . . yeah and I was just screaming in my head for it to stop because it was wrong. It wasn't Albus but it looked like him and that's the freaky part.

Harry Potter what have you done to your son? Speaking of Harry, are you going to tell us the events that led to Harry basically going crazy?


This is why it takes me so long to read the new chapters of your story, I spend time emotionally preparing myself for every new thing that you bring to the table.

Please do the world a favour and become a published author.

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Review #8, by TheGoldenGirl Fear

30th June 2014:
i am literally hooked on this book, please keep updating i feel like there's a plot twist in every chapter and it makes me re-read the book over again :)
p.s i don't know if it's weird but i ship albus and rose O.O i don't know why...

Author's Response: There IS a plot twist every chapter haha, I hope it's not too confusing!

Haha you're P.S. amuses me...

Thanks for stopping by and glad you're enjoying! Next chapter in queue!

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Review #9, by HeyMrsPotter Freeze

30th June 2014:
I'm finally back for more of your wonderful story! The next chapter is MORE shocking? How much more shocking than Ron and Hermione possibly being alive does it get?!?!

I love that you gave Rose a little break and it was nice to read her having an almost normal moment (I say almost cause let's face it, it was dinner with the Malfoys!) I really liked her interactions with Scorpius-their not-flirting is too funny. And Draco was just so perfect, his behaviour suggests he changed as I always suspected he did after the war, but not so much that he was out of character.

There was a little grammar thing I picked up on in your speech. Generally at the end of speech, if it is followed by 'Rose said' or 'Scorpius replied' etc, (i.e. if it is describing how the speech was spoken and who by) then the punctuation at the end of the spoken words is a comma rather than a full stop:
"Don't be silly, darling," Astoria said kindly.
"Not hungry," she murmured. (unless the word following the speech is a name or an I, then that should begin with a lowercase letter)
There are some parts where the speech is punctuated correctly and some where it isn't, so you may want to give it a once over :)

That doesn't distract from this chapter being as wonderful as all of the rest though :D

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Review #10, by :) Fear

28th June 2014:
Brilliant story! I've never read something so well written and captivating as this story on this site! Can't wait for the next chapter.

Author's Response: Oh wow, that's such a compliment :)

Next chapter in queue, thanks so much for dropping by! Glad you're enjoying!

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Review #11, by catty Fear

28th June 2014:
This was probably my favorite chapter to read. OMG the horror of facing fears, the Other, and how Albus took care of that. Then there is Rose and Albus and their evolving relationship and omg, it's perfection!

Author's Response: Yeah Albus really 'takes care' of the Other; I love writing evil!Albus haha. We'll get more insight on his and Rose's evolving relationship next chapter. Thanks for dropping by! :)

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Review #12, by Pia Fear

27th June 2014:

Dear Merlin! I think you just outdone yourself!!

Roses's fear is pretty obvious and heartbreaking and I just hope is not some kind of foreshadowing...

I'm loving this "new" Albus,to see a little bit of him beneath the ice curtain. The fact that he is his biggest fear shows that he actually cares (even if it just a little) for the consequences of his actions,especially regarding Rose, it seems to me that he is terrified of what he might do to her if he loses control.

Also, Albus's reaction when Rose said she loved him was so sad, given the Hannibalistic (pun intended) way he dealt with the Other, it seems to me that he thinks he is not worthy of any love at all, it's hate and pain he is expecting from everyone, even from himself.
Let's see how he deals with James rescue attempt...

And poor Rose, she is going to have to deal with her parents deaths all over again!

Keep writing as fast as you can! I can't wait to your favourite parts! :D

Author's Response: Glad you enjoyed this chapter, it was one of the tougher ones to write!

I really like your analysis of Albus; the fact his fear is himself shows that he does ultimately fear what he's capable of. Control is a big theme in the next chapter, so you'll definitely be getting more insight on that ;)

Oh yeah, Albus gettin' his Mr. Hannibal Lecter on haha.

Albus' reaction to being told that; it just came as such a shock to him and it's sad that he's come not to expect from anyone. Really good analysis.

Next chapter is called Grieve, so yeah, poor Rose...

Will do! As always, thanks for R&Ring!

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Review #13, by Dirigible_PLums Fear

27th June 2014:
Oh my God. I think I'm speechless...


Author's Response: haha, bet you and your sister didn't see that coming? ;)

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Review #14, by Midnight spark Fear

27th June 2014:
Oh god, oh god, oh god! I mean, i just love this story so much! Do update soon, can't wait to see what's happening next!

Author's Response: Next chapter is in the queue! Glad you're enjoying and come by again!

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Review #15, by evil little devil Fear

27th June 2014:
Oh wow, that was intense and scary. You do psychological horror type stuff super well. That was absolutely terrifying! In the best way possible, of course. So Albus' fear is himself? That is interesting. I thought it might be Harry, but this actually makes a lot more sense. That whole section with him killing the other Albus, and the thoughts running through his mind with the capitalised phrases - that was so well done. It almost stream of consciousness like, and a really fascinating insight into his mind.
Just, wow. Amazing chapter, can't wait for more :)

Author's Response: I'm glad it makes sense; Albus might've feared his father but it was mostly out of reverence and due to his young age- although his fear had some obvious origins. Fears are very subliminal things. I really wanted to show how a boy who essentially views himself as fearless, and, to some extent, invincible, would handle facing himself. So maybe Albus fears the future, what he's capable of?

That scene was probably my favorite and it was actually written in one go so it's my stream of consciousness too. I wanted it feel very raw; to some extent, it's a quick spiral into madness.

Thanks for the fantastic review and glad you're enjoying! Next chapter in queue :)

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Review #16, by whykay Fear

27th June 2014:
Oh My. That is his fear? Does this make Albus more human - seeing his inhuman incestuous avataar?

Rose: Fears are not fantasies. So true.

Ron and Hermione? Not Harry? Is that real or is that also a fear?

Update soon please?

Author's Response: Not Harry, no, and that part's real. Next update is in queue! Thanks for reading and glad you're enjoying!

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Review #17, by hedera Her

26th June 2014:
Hello! I'm here for the review swap :)

I have to admit, I've read this before. In my defence I read it on a train, on my phone so the review probably would've been around two lines long, filled with strange autocorrect-typos and posted about 14 times because I was going through a bridge. But anyway, it was about time I reviewed this incredible story.

I know that I say a lot of things are great/incredible/wonderful etc. etc. etc. and I really do think that basically everything on this site is potential filled awesomeness but this I have to say doesn't have a huge amount of potential because the potential is already filled. I'm not sure how well I phrased that but basically what I mean is that this is totally up to the standard of any published book, like good published book. The sort of thing the Guardian likes.

Honestly the more I like a story, the more sort of unintelligible I tend to be with reviews, but you know I do try so I hope this is up to some kind of standard.

Wow a three paragraph introductory sort of a thing- that's a record, even for me!

I thought that your strongest area in this chapter was probably your dialogue. It was tension filled, useful, and most importantly (for me) realistic. I think often dialogue which is meant for information and dramatic purpose can be quite contrived, and that was something which you completely avoided, so a BIG well done!

The other thing I really liked was a simple phrase- 'Prisoner 11 had been an academic fixation of mine for months.' I like it because it is so full of information about the narrators attitude towards prisoner 11. The fact that he refers to her by her number is interesting but not unusual. The idea of her being an academic fixation, however, is more arresting. He wants to hear her story not because he is interested in her humanity, but because he is curious. He wants to know to extend his own knowledge, not so he has more knowledge of her. Anyway, that's how I interpreted it ;)

This was an extremely interesting first chapter with a very dark tone- and there's nothing I like more than a dark tone. I promise I'll go on and review all the following chapters at some point but it's nearing midnight and I pretty much guarantee my reviews will become simply 'hng too good' if I carry on much longer!

Ooh, and before I forget, I loved the German Houselves- Deutsch ist die beste! (after Dutch, of course ;))


Author's Response: Oh gosh that is the ultimate compliment and I totally get what you're saying. That really is sweet of you and the Guardian, oh gawsh... (I'm so bad at taking these types of compliments).

This first chapter is probably my most polished. Later on (depending on how far you're read), things get crazy and go all over the place.

I'm always working on dialogue. Dialogue is a big thing for me too haha.

Well that's an interesting interpretation! I agree that in the beginning Mr. Walker probably sees Rose nothing more than a tool for knowledge. Later on, of course, he gets more invested in her as a human being - though he does retain that same detached composure. Hmm, that was a really interesting view!

I would be absolutely HONORED if you left more reviews. Thanks so much and get some sleep! (I don't even speak Deutsch haha - French FTW!).

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Review #18, by pikachewbites Fear

26th June 2014:
Holy crap that whole thing with the Other is just insane I don't even know what to say. When the Other kissed Rose, it added to my growing suspicion that Albus may have some romantic feelings for his cousin. Or maybe I'm just reading too much into things??

I always knew Albus was a dark fellow but the way he killed his doppelganger was so sadistic & wow. Now I'm curious what was in your original draft if this version is this dark. Definitely not complaining though, I love dark twisted stories & reading this chapter was just mind blowing

Author's Response: The original draft goes further with the murder and kiss scenes and, well, there's a lot of blood and stuff that I worried would turn readers off.

You're probably not the only person thinking that right now haha and I'm not telling. But Remember what Rose said, "fears are fears, not fantasies". It will come into play later.

Glad you enjoyed it!

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Review #19, by rachlyy (I won't let you) Run

25th June 2014:
This story is my favorite fanfic that I've ever read. It rivals many books, I kinda wish it was a book so that I could just tear through it in two days, it's that good. Whatever you do, keep writing, I need more!!

Author's Response: Oh gosh that really is so sweet of you to say. I wish I could write faster haha...I will try to make as many updates as I can this summer. Thanks for sticking with me!

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Review #20, by AlexFan (I won't let you) Run

23rd June 2014:
It was so weird seeing this side of Albus, the side that he actually cares, even a little bit about anyone in his life. It was weird but it was nice, kind of sweet, especially the ending. I'm beginning to feel like Albus had convinced himself that no one cares and that he's all on his own because of the way that he's been treated by some of the most important people in a child's life. It looks as if Rose's persistence has actually paid off this time though, she got Albus to stay and she got a nap and a hug out of him. How many people can claim that about Albus Potter?

Rose's boss thinks the worst of her. You'd think that for someone who's probably spent a lot of time around her that he'd know at least something about her but apparently not. Rose has far too much on her hands to be thinking about boyfriends or sleeping with that Bulgarian friend of hers. But I suppose when you do the work that he does you have to assume the worst of people to get anywhere.

Author's Response: Good point. No I don't think that many people can claim that about Albus Potter haha. We'll continue to explore more about him (and Rose).

The Head is a pretty funny dude sometimes, I think. But it's better that he suspects her of sleeping around than, say, messing with dangerous magic again right? That might REALLY get her in trouble.

Thanks so much for your wonderful review!

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Review #21, by lizzie (I won't let you) Run

21st June 2014:
this story is my whole entire life. I'm sorry I don't have much criticism for you, I just wanted to let you know that this story is one of my favorites that I've ever come across on this website. it rivals the writing of published books. please, please never stop writing. you have a talent in this field that the world needs.

Author's Response: Oh gosh this is the ultimate compliment - I'm literally blushing right now. Thanks so much for your kind words and your support. I will finish this story no matter what, don't worry ;)

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Review #22, by Allison (I won't let you) Run

21st June 2014:
I love when Rose and Al are as they should be. My OTP is Rose/Scorpius, but I find myself not caring all that much about them in this story. I just want Rose and Al to be okay, and knowing about Al's premature death is just a little heartbreaking. Still really enjoyed this chapter and I'm dying to know about the mystery with the shack and their parents, so I hope you'll update soon! Also, how long do you envision this fic being? I'm so impatient and just want a general idea of when the big reveal will occur, haha.

Author's Response: Hey there! I envision this story being around 35 chapters right now, but this could change depending on how future scenes write themselves. That being said, I'm trying to make as many updates as I can this summer - next chapter is already in Queue. Thanks for sticking with me through it all! Hope you continue to enjoy!

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Review #23, by Midnight spark (I won't let you) Run

20th June 2014:
I simply love this story! I usually don't read horror fanfics, but ever since i read this story i got so caught up in it that i am writing a horror/adventure story now! Thank you for this story!! 10/10

Author's Response: Oh my gosh that's the best compliment ever! Thank you so much for this review :)

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Review #24, by Lixa (I won't let you) Run

19th June 2014:
The relationship between Rose and Al is so complex and tense, but then you have sweet moments. I am just enthralled by them, you write so beautifully!

Author's Response: Thanks so much for your compliments! Happy reading :)

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Review #25, by Pia (I won't let you) Run

19th June 2014:

I loved this chapter!

I must say that seeing Albus' softer side is a relief, like Rose, I also want to believe that he still has a heart but at the same time, that makes everything worse because I can only imagine the huge pain he must have felt all his life, sometimes feeling nothing at all is better...

Moving on, I'm glad that I wasn't totally wrong, Albus was testing Rose and Scorpius' skills when he left them to fight alone, he wanted to push their limits but I guess is save to say that he was pretty sure that they would make it, well, at least Rose...From what we can see in this chapter, it seems to me that he is not ready to let go and I guess that the same thing can be said about Rose.

Those Crow people are showing that crows have really sharp claws, aren't they? ;)
I can only wonder want they want with Albus?

And I also wanted to say that you don't need to thank me for my poor reviews! I mean, like I said before, I've been waiting to read something like this for years and I'm just sorry that due to my not so good English, I'm not able to make more constructive, detailed reviews like this story and you deserve (not that you need my advice, of couse, but I think you know what I mean).
I'm ready for reviewing the next chapter and all those which will follow the best I can!

Author's Response: Oh yes, there's a lot more to Albus than meets the eye. I do have so much fun writing him. It doesn't seem like they're ready to let each go , are they?

hey, I LOVE your reviews. They're fantastic and absolutely make my day. I would be honored if you continue giving me reviews :)

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