Very interesting, I think you set up the next chapter to be the most fun to read.

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Just when he finds courage, he has to wait for Teddy.

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okay i am sorry if i annoy you, but it is kind of strange that non of my reveiws is shown on the reveiw thingie page or some thing.

BUT JUST TO MAKE SURE YOU KNOW, i love love love your fanfiction, and i think you should keep writing!
UPDATE UPDATE UPDATE!
I would like to have more Scorpius POV c: i think he is really cute. *blushing*

And i absolutely adore Molly/Lawrence! They are SO cute!

*hugs!*
Amalie
Candyfloss Unicorn

Author's Response: YOU LIKE THEM TOO?!
OMG!!!
I'm glad you like them coz they really are one of my favorite couples.
I have three fav couples
Rose/scorpius
Molly/Lawrence
and the other one will be introduced in some chapters more!
I was thinking about doing more about Molly and Lauri but my main couples is Rose/Scorpius. It doesn't mean Molly and Lauri will disappear.
Don't worry next chapter is short but it will have Scorpius POV. So I think you'll like it.
*hugs*
R.W

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This chapter was kind of confusing, but still love it!

:D

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Still love this!

I really want to hug you for this story.

But i can't...

SO HUGS OVER THE INTERNET :D

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It's okay, I was only a little confused, I snapped out of it. I'm just happy for Molly. I like her new boyfriend.
see you soon :)

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This is awsome! but who in the name of Merlin is Lawrance Dumbldore? Why dont you let me read when you are writing?!
Love
sis

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Ugh oh! I guess she wasn't ready for that to happen. Guess she should have listened and given up drinking to get drunk.

Author's Response: you know when I wrote this part a thought popped up in my mind. That was that the real reason people (especially young people) drink is to forget. Which I believe is not correct at all. This chapter was to show in a way that no matter how much you drink to forget the pain won't go away. If you want the pain to go away then you have to get up. The next chapter is going to be a bit about that.
Thanks for the review!
Rose Williams

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A time turner, I think this story just went from fiction to sci-fi. Awesome!
I will be on the look out for the next chapter :)

Author's Response: Thanks a lot! I got the idea when i was reading the third book.
The next chapter will be veeerryyy looonng i think i have written over 7000 words and i still haven't finished. I think it will take me a bit to update.
Lots of Love
R.W

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update update update update update!!! PLS!

Author's Response: I would love to update but you see my classes are starting very soon and I have been shopping for school things like crazy these days. Anyways i'll do my best to update as fast as i can!
I'm glad you like it!
Sincerely
R.W

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YAY! Teddy! I was hoping he would pop up in this story!

(I am a big sucker for Teddy) :)

Anyways, this was another lovely chapter. I am interested to see where this progression with Malfoy goes. I am excited, I hope they go far! :)

Great job!

Camille
GrangerDanger76

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I LOVE this story! Few grammar and spelling errors but we all do that! anyways! Fantastic story! I hope you are writing a new chapter now!

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Sounds like some wheels are ready to turn and a bet on the winner lol

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Wow! Very nice yet again. I liked Scorpius POV a lot, although I was a little confused like "Wasn't there just a party?" HAHA.

Anyways, great job yet again, I don't have very much to stay but keep writing, I love seeing your growth as a writer! :)

Camille
GrangerDange76

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Hello! Back again!

So this was another lovely chapter! I am so happy to see you have changed your quotation method, and you have developed solid footing in fanfiction. I found a few typos, so if you just give it a quick read through I am sure you will find them.

However there is one thing that is bothering me. Being that these characters are British, it is highly unlikely for any of them to speak Spanish. I am assuming you speak it, and then are trying to incorporate that, which is great, but perhaps you could choose another language, such as French, or even Latin, since much of the wizarding spells are Latin based. You could even stretch it as far as having any European-based languages, would be much more probable then Spanish, even though Spain is Europe. That is just my suggestion, though.

Other then that, you are doing great! Just a reminder, do not give away any personal information (ie, last names, address,) for that is both against site rules and not very safe! I hope your sister creates an account, and starts her own fanfiction journey! :)

Camille
GrangerDanger76

Author's Response: ha ha ha. Rose Williams is not my real name nor my sister's I don't really like the name my parents gave us coz you can't shorten it so i decided to call us Rosaline and Josephine Williams. It's just our penames.
Anyways, I know what you mean about spanish but I just thought it would be interesting because Antonio Banderas, Enrique Iglesias and manny other REALLY hot guys come form Spain and I thought "Why not incluse a charming/playboy spanish guy?"
I don't speak french, though I do know a bit of Latin though.
And i think Josephine will post her story soon too.
And thanks for the suggestions I really love them!
Love
R.W

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my god ur punctuation is awful.

Author's Response: hahahhahahah
Yeah, i know i have always been hopless in grammar!!!
Thanks though, it's good to know my flaws
Lots of Love
R.W

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That was a great right cross for Rose. How was she supposed to know malfoy was seriously saving her butt?
I think Scorpius is not putting faith in the Weasley clan in their ability to forgive. He's missing out on what could be a wonderful relationship. The boy needs to realize that the war is over and being the son of a deatheater doesn't sound that scarey anymore. If the father is free, he wasn't much of a threat, now was he? boy should wake up and live life as he wants and not worry about being worthy of anyone. Being a good person should be enough.
liked this chapter alot.

Author's Response: Yeah i know what you mean about the weasley's but don't forget that the story still continues.
Thanks, I'm glad you liked this chapter!

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That wasn't a very nice question of Dom to ask in the presence of a malfoy. What a terrible number to give to any girl.

Good chapter

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Hey I'm back! Another lovely chapter! I really liked Rose's internal monologue because it really let's us get a feel of her character. I see youve sorta settled into an Author's Style and I'm so happy for you, and cant wait to see your growth throughout the story :)

GrangerDanger76
Camille

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Awsome! I really like this chapter. I will keep reading this.

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This is a great story you should keep writing!

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awesome!nice chapter.but the characters dom and kenzie isn't of j.k.rowling.

Author's Response: Dom is of J.K Rowling because she is the daughter of Bill Weasley. Kenize was character my sister Josephine came up with.
Thank you very much you are my second reviewer! I hope you like the second chapter!
Lots of Love
Rose williams

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Hey! This is a really good start! I really liked the beginning... Rose is very witty which makes her really relatable and charming. I liked her friends too and the little insite about her family.

One thing I wasn't too sure on is why you used the style of dialogue that you did. Although this is fanfiction, generally here at HPFF we use traditional novel style dialogue. Such as...

"I know," replied Dom. "But you know James and Fred would want us to be happy for them."

"True."

"Guys we should get going or we will be late."

"That’s exactly what we want." Said Dom smiling mischievously.

"Why?" I asked.

The quotations help minimize the confusion between dialogue and narration. However other than that this was a great chapter and I am looking forward to reading the rest.

Author's Response: Why thank you GrangerDanger76 I was waiting for a review so that i could post the next six chapters.
Tell u what?
because u are my first review i will send u a review of every new chapter i have the day i send it for validation.
yours truly
rosaline williams
P.S: thanks for the quotation tip!!

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