Oh I loved this. It was so young and cute and your right, you don't usually read many Roxanne stories. :)Author's Response: Hey! Thank you so much! I'm really pleased you enjoyed this! Report Review
This was again very different from everything else you've written. It was not dark and heavy like most of your stories, and it was a nice change.
I love that Roxanne Weasley is the main character. You don't hear that much about her (compared to the others in this era), but she deserves just as much attention. You characterize her well. I love how she seems so bored, because she already knows so much about the castle. She is more focused on getting friends, because the magic around her doesn't really surprise her or impress her that much. She already knows everything about it. I believe that's how it would feel for a wizard or witch from family of magic. They focus more on getting friends.
I also think Roxanne is quite similar to her father and her uncle. It seems like she wants to follow in their footsteps, and get as many detentions as possible. She just seems to have this easy-going view on life, which is not that weird since she's eleven years old. But you also see her fear. That appears when she no longer knows what will happen. That makes me think she likes to be in control, likes to know what's going to happen. At the same time, she also loves to discover new things or new places, which actually gave me the image of her using the marauders map. She just seems like the type of person that would use that quite regularly, and mostly to get herself out of trouble with the teachers. I hope I'm not all wrong, but that's what I imagined.
Anyway, I also loved that you made the sorting a secret. I think its very realistic (in the hp world) that they would keep something about Hogwarts a secret, or it would just be a bit boring to start there really. But what I love the most is actually Roxanne's attitude after she has been sorted. Her fear is instantly vanished, and she just act like it was never there at all.
I'm sorry for my bad english in this review, but its way past midnight and I'm really tired. Hope you can understand it anyway.
- Your Secret Santa (I'm guessing you already know who I am, but I'm writing this anyway) Report Review
Hi! I'm here for the holiday review! =)
It was fun to read about Roxanne Weasley for a change. I was actually expecting her to end up in Slytherin, since she had such a mischevious streak. I can just imagine how George's kids would cause a havoc in Hogwarts, since they have unlimited supply of Wizard Wheezes in their disposal.
Roxanne's character was quite well crafted. Clearly she's set out to break Fred's & George's record in amount of getting detentions (and probably howlers from her mother). I really liked that she had an inquisitive mind, but I can see how a kid like that could be quite exhausting for parents. Too bad we didn't get to see one of the ballads she had prepared for the sorting ceremony. =)
There were quite many typos in this chapter, so I recommend rereading it with a thought. Your writing was easy to read and very enjoyable, and it ended with a bang, or should I say with Ton-Tongue Toffee. =PAuthor's Response: Hi! So sorry for the epically long time it took me to respond to this review :P
Yeah, i agree, there is so few stories of Roxanne and i'm glad you liked her. Slytherin? hehehe, that would have thrown George for a curveball :P I've always imagined Roxanne the one that would wreck havoc with a little help from Fred obviously as he'd be brains and wit behind her operations, otherwise she'd just spend all her time in detention as she too impulsive. I'm glad you liked her as a character and i am going through it and getting it beta read to clean it up so there isn't so many mistakes!
Thank you so much for your review and thoughts, i really appreciate it so much!! Report Review
Well I really enjoyed this little story! I am horrible when it comes to next gen characters, seriously. I rarely know who is who unless it's the core trio and their children. I know, it's awful. Yet from the beginning I just had the foreboding that this little girl belonged to George :)
I feel like she's got a bit of an attitude going into the castle, a kind of like...I am so over this, I already know what's going to happen here I might as well be in my third year. Which honestly, is probably what a lot of children think when they come from a very long family. I really like that they kept the secret of the sorting from her though, because it at least some air of mystery.
And the bit about the toffees, definitely George's girl there! But I feel so bad for the kid up in front of the whole school whose tongue is like protruding from his mouth! It's supposed to be a time that he remembers and enjoys, his sorting, but he has to deal with this prank! I just feel bad for him is all. But it something that George's offspring would definitely do!
I feel like toward the end of your story you kind of switched tenses from past to present, but then occasionally you slip back into past tense again, which is something you may want to look at.
Overall I really enjoyed this story, I think you did a great job with the description and the imagery, especially in the beginning as she was coming across in the boats in anticipation of her first year.
Great job!Author's Response: Hey! Sorry it's taken me an obscenely long time to respond to this!
She does have a bit of an attitude and i can see that if I explored her more I think it would show a bit more that she doesn't know as much as she thinks she does. It would be a humbling experience. However, at this point, she thinks she knows it all. I agree that it comes from having her whole family come through Hogwarts already and being the last it may seem like old news, less exciting and more expected.
Haha, i know, i felt bad doing it to him and tried thinking of another way to add that part in but it just seemed to work there best. though he may not recover from the embarrassment.
I liked the beginning best as well, i think i lost some of the narrative style the more I wrote this. That came from me writing this in a few different sittings i think. Thank you though for all your lovely comments and pointing out the tense issue! Thanks! Report Review
Saw that you wanted an opinion on this on that thing we call the forums and I've hopped on by. I think this is a really well-written story, especially for a one-shot because I feel like I sometimes tend to rush a bit. But the gradual reveal of Roxanne was a good way to leave us wondering just which Weasley we were dealing with. I enjoyed her thought processes as well, coupled with her slight boredom at knowing everything about Hogwarts already. Of course, the slight nerves she had even while handing out sweets (I knew that wasn't going to end well, hahah) to the others was nicely detailed. It didn't feel overdone and I was able to grasp her emotions really well, so that was enjoyable and I loved the tidbits you give about her family. I could sense that things had changed slightly at Hogwarts (Hagrid, I'll miss your Care of Magical Creature's class! Haha) and her relatives along with it. But not quite so much of course, considering that she was handing out Tongue-Tongue-Toffee like a good little imp. Hehehe.
I'm a huge fan of George/Angelina by the way and its really nice to read another Roxanne Weasley story, even though this one was sadly, a one-shot. If you want or wanted, you could check out my story, "Abandon" on my author page because I think you said you hadn't read many Roxanne stories. This is just shameless promotion on my part so forgive me. Hahaha.
Anyway, I wish that you would make this into a whole story because I really liked it! :D
Hope to see you on the forums!
Here's a fat kitten!
GabbieAuthor's Response: Hey! Sorry it's taken so long for me to respond to this! The holiday exchange made my reviews build up a little!
I'm really pleased that you got the sense of change here. I've always read next gen where many of the professors are in the same posts and it's always irritated me a little because some of them would have been OLD. Teachers could easily retire, die, or just move on to somewhere else and i doubt they'd be in one place forever. Anyway, enough of that little rant!
Thank you so much for your lovely comments about the story and that you liked how it all came together. I've become quite unhappy with the end half of the story for some reason but i'm happy that you could connect with it ;P
Thanks for the fat kitten, they are the best kind *snuggles it*
-zayne Report Review
Really like your opening to this story, particularly the description of Leo the caretaker.
*laughs* Roxanne is the youngest of the Weasley cousins in my next generation series too. I forgot it wasn't canon, reading this, because it fits with my idea of where she comes in the family.
I wonder how George reacted to having his son placed in Ravenclaw. *laughs*
Roxanne sounds like a Gryffindor to me anyway. *reads on to see where you've put her*
Did you mean "she'd renounce right now", rather than "she's renounce right now"?
Aw, that's kind of sad about Hagrid no longer being able to perform the gamekeeping duties. I guess it makes sense though.
Really good chapter.Author's Response: Thank you so much! I think the beginning was the strongest bit of this as well. I'm less happy with it as it goes on and i think i lost the thread of narrative and was just trying to finish it.
I'm glad it fit your canon, i've always thought that both of them might be a bit younger and that George wouldn't have married right away.
Haha, yeah right? I put him there because i always saw the twins as really clever individuals, clever and witty and i've always imagined Roxanne as the courageous mischievous one while Fred might be the one who has more the brains and have those genetics.
It always annoys me a little when Hogwarts teachers are still teaching at Hogwarts in Next Gen. Sure, some of them might be there but others might have left after the war, others might have died, retired, been fired or what have you as no one stays in a post forever. Anyway, i won't rant about that but i'm gad you felt it made sense.
Thanks for reviewing!! :P Report Review
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