157 Reviews Found

Review #1, by LavenderBlue IV. Rose Weasley

5th January 2014:
I thought I should check in here and let you know how much I'm enjoying this read! I was led to "Twin Wands" when I noticed that it preceded your current "The Peverell Society," and it's been a treat to read so far. Beautiful writing. I can't wait to read more!

 Report Review

Review #2, by NightRook4510 XII. Sober Truths

5th January 2014:
I really like that you included Belle from Before They Fall. The Rose/Scorp love is one of my faves.

 Report Review

Review #3, by Secret Santa 2013 III. Hestia Jones

23rd December 2013:
Hello again, dear!! I am back for more. Sorry, I know I didn't review the last chapter. It was just SO good that I HAD to keep going! You really do have a knack for leaving off on those cliffhangers, lol! =P

Overall, this is really good tho! I'm so glad that Pavarti is in the clear now, that was a relief. You did her reaction to everything well tho; it was very believable. I also like how you put in the reminder that Dedalus & Hestia were the ones who protected the Dursley's during the war, cuz honestly I had forgotten all about that connection... Honestly, it's starting to make me wonder if someone from the Dursley family, or perhaps someone asociated with them, is in on this. Hmmm... I have a few theories brewing up, but I suppose I'll just have to read on to find out more. The suspense is killing me right now tho, lol!! Oh, and I really enjoyed her mentioning of how the Dursley's were such a nightmare, lol. That was such a good way to interject some humor into such a tense situation. Well done! :)

I keep seeing all these 1990-something dates inserted here and there, and I love how precise your timeline is. However, I think I missed what year this story is taking place in somehow, lol! So, if I may ask; exactly how many years after the war is all of this taking place? If if was mentioned before now, I must have missed it. But if it hasn't been mentioned yet, then you may wanna slip that in somewhere, to avoid future confusion for blondes like me, lol!! ^_^'

Your story-telling skills are remarkable, to say the least. Every now and again I have come across a few minor grammatical errors tho, such as missing commas and the occasional run-on sentence... There was also one thing that really stood out to me in this chapter, when Harry is giving Scorpius the details of his mission, that you may wanna go back and make a quick revision on in this paragraph here:
"Scorpius, we have a mission for you." he started. "if you choose to accept it, you must known that it is highly classified. Nobody will known where you are, not even your family and should it prove unsuccessful, nobody must know about its existence at all. We do not think it to be dangerous at this time but that may change at any time."

In the first line, the period after 'for you' should be changed to a comma. Also, the word "kown" is used twice here, an it should be just "know" without the n at the end. The 'i' in "if" should be capitalized, and there should be a comma after 'your family,' or you could also put a period there and start a new sentence. I also think that there should be a comma in the last sentence, after "at this time" as well... It's all mostly just minor stuff like that that sticks out to me, but that paragraph in particular took away from my reading a bit, as it disrupted the flow because I had to pause and reread it in order to decipher it. I got the meaning behind it tho, which is good. Sorry if I'm being too overly picky here.

Your characterization of the Trio is so accurate tho, especially with Harry!! And Ron's reaction over Rose was perfect for him, lol. I also enjoyed how Hermione stormed into the meeting at the end of the last chapter too. Its good to see that you have stayed true to her bossy/overbearing nature as she's gotten older... Poor Scorpius just gets asigned to do all the dirty work, doesn't he? Lol! ;) I love that he is becoming one of the main characters of this tho. Draco is one of my favorite HP characters, so I also love reading next-gen stories about his son as well. Can't wait to see what happens when he drops in on Rose, lol. This should be interesting. I can't wait to read more!! Check back in with ya later... Great story so far, Ral!! =)

 Report Review

Review #4, by Secret Santa 2013 I. Dedalus Diggle

23rd December 2013:
Ho ho ho, your Secret Santa is here to spread some Holiday cheer!!! (Sorry, I just couldn't help myself, lol!)

Ok, so when I got to your author page, I was gonna read/review your most current story, but then I saw that it was actually a sequel to this one, and that got me really excited, lol. See, I LOVE longer stories a lot more than I do shorts stories. I just feel like, with novels, you have a whole bunch more space and freedom to tell a good tale, and fully develop all of the characters along the way. And then I read the description and saw who the MC's were and I knew then that I HAD to read it!! :)

That being said, I'm glad now that I started this one. Your 1st chapter is SO good, and it has definitely sparked my interest. I can tell already that you're a good mystery writer, so I know I'm in for a treat, haha! The introduction was very well done. I like the way you set the scene and established a tone for this story there within the first few paragraphs. Very well done. Side-note; you totally got me with the whole mysterious nods to a "Malfoy" in the beginning. I thot you were talking about Draco at first, lol! XD

Now that I do know how old everyone is tho, I am even more interested to see how you develop these characters as the story progresses. & I am especially intrigued to see how Rose & Scorpius interact once she becomes more involved too. So far I feel like your overall characterization of everyone is pretty good; especially with Harry. I found his reaction to Dedalus's death to be very realistic. I also like how you've inserted little tid-bits of their Hogwarts days here and there throughout this chapter as well. & The ending was perfect. I love the fact that you left it on such a strong cliffhanger. OMG, Parvarti Patil can NOT be the killer tho. I refuse to accept this is possible, lol!! Hopefully she has just been setup or something, and they can get to the bottom of thing soon...

Wow, I really do like this story so far, and I cannot wait to get into it and read more! I may not be able to get thru this whole story before the Holidays are over, but I will definitely have to save this to my favs/reading list so I can finish it afterwards. And I'll have to add the sequel of this to my reading list as well!! Merry Christmas Ral!!! =D

 Report Review

Review #5, by LightLeviosa5443 XV. The Next Adventure

28th November 2013:
That was a great story! I loved it! Brilliant job!

xoxo LL

Author's Response: Thank you!

 Report Review

Review #6, by LightLeviosa5443 XI. Drunken Minds

28th November 2013:
LOVED IT! Fantastic! Brilliant chapter!!

xoxo LL

Author's Response: Thank you so much!

 Report Review

Review #7, by LightLeviosa5443 X. Revelations

28th November 2013:
I really liked the suspense in this chapter. Great job!

xoxo LL

Author's Response: Hehehe I'm glad to hear it! Thank you!

 Report Review

Review #8, by LightLeviosa5443 VII. The Wandlore Student

28th November 2013:
Oh man, good thing the wand isnt in there!!

xoxo LL

Author's Response: I know, right? :P :D

 Report Review

Review #9, by LightLeviosa5443 VI. Grimmauld Place, The Ministry and back again

28th November 2013:
I love the ending on that one! It was brilliant! I can't wait to read more! Brilliant job!

xoxo LL

Author's Response: thank you so much! I really appreciate it!

 Report Review

Review #10, by LightLeviosa5443 V. Potter Manor/The Burrow

28th November 2013:
Interesting, I like the tension between Hermione and Rose. Funny comment at the end of the chapter, there.

I wonder why Harry and Ginny don't just stay at Grimmauld place, wouldn't that be the safest for them?

xoxo LL

Author's Response: Because the way I see it, Grimmauld reminds Harry of Sirius and death and his year on the run. Plus, I'd think he'd want to keep a close eye on his in-laws!

Thank you for the lovely review!


 Report Review

Review #11, by LightLeviosa5443 IV. Rose Weasley

28th November 2013:
I loved this chapter! I love the patronus bursting through the window! That was brilliant.

xoxo LL

Author's Response: Thank you so much!

 Report Review

Review #12, by LightLeviosa5443 III. Hestia Jones

28th November 2013:
Haha, I love how Hestia's niece said that the Harry's family was awful. Too funny.

Has Scorpius ever taken a muggle plane? This'll be a good next chapter!

xoxo LL

Author's Response: I don't think he ever has, but I imagine his Auror training has prepared him for this moment! And I do believe the Dursleys would become the stuff of legends for the wizarding world. Much like the Boogie Man!

Thank you for the review!


 Report Review

Review #13, by LightLeviosa5443 II. Parvarti Patil

28th November 2013:
This is great! I love a good mystery and romance interwined. I really like the issue of the wands, you're creating a really interesting plot. I love your use of details as well, some people aren't able to put a lot of details in because they aren't sure, so this is brilliant!!

xoxo LL

 Report Review

Review #14, by LightLeviosa5443 I. Dedalus Diggle

28th November 2013:
I really like this story! Great job! Poor Parvati, she's got not a lot of fun coming her way. I cant wait until Rose is introduced, this will be interesting.

You have a really captivating writing style, I'm interested in seeing what you do with the rest of the story!

xoxo LL

 Report Review

Review #15, by Pixileanin IV. Rose Weasley

21st October 2013:
Okay, here we go. I've been waiting for all the reasons why Rose is so far removed from her family, and this seems to be the chapter that should at least begin to address all of that. *rubs hands together*

I love the description that you've given to the city as Scorpius mulls his way through it. The way you describe the streets, narrow like Diagon Alley, and easy to hide a shop it, I liked that a lot.

You've set Rose up to be such a wand expert here. It makes me want to know more about the Romanian wand maker and all the secrets he must have in his life. And she really knows her wandlore. I wonder what she'd make of a mandrake wand. Do you think they even make mandrake wands? I bet they're for really messed up people... or deaf people. Actually, I bet wands are only made out of hardwoods, and even dried, the mandrake root wouldn't make such a good stick... all shrively and limp.

Anyway, I love how easygoing she seems in this setting, and how Scorpius picks up on that. He'll probably have a bit of guilt tearing her away from all of this, that is, if she agrees to go.

I wondered how you were going to have Scorpius ask her to come back with him to help, but you handled it really well with the patronus showing up and giving us that jolting cliffhanger. I don't think Rose Weasley can ignore that kind of a message. *nods head* Yep. She's going.

Lovely chapter, with so much going on here.

 Report Review

Review #16, by Gaius Scipio XV. The Next Adventure

13th September 2013:
A great ending to a great story. A pity about the wand though, but then again I felt the same way about the Philosophers stone. And now on to the next great adventure, what mysteries lie waiting for us in the Peverell Society I wonder

Author's Response: Thank you so much for all your lovely reviews! They really mean a lot! :)

 Report Review

Review #17, by Gaius Scipio XIV. The Great Plan

13th September 2013:
Well I must confess I didn't see that one coming. I really enjoyed the chapter but I think Hermione and Rose made up too soon. And Ron, I was kinda hoping he would have put up a better fight. Still the surprise more than made up for everything else

Author's Response: At the end of the day, blood is thicker than water, and I believe that family can forgive anything and not hold grudges.

As for Ron, in my vision of things, after over 30 years of knowing Harry and working with him, I believe he'd trust Harry with his life. So, there was no point in putting up a fight and getting them both killed. :)

I'm happy you liked the chapter! Thank you!


 Report Review

Review #18, by Gaius Scipio XIII. The Mission

12th September 2013:
I have been meaning to write this review for ages and finally got around to doing it. May I say another great chapter, I wondered when we might see Draco and he finally appeared. I thought however, that he was going to throw a tantrum like Ron might, but he seems to have mellowed out since Hogwarts. Some very funny moments also "Don't mention it - ever." LOL.

Author's Response: I wanted Draco to be in this, to sort of show the way in which he's grown over the years and changed. He will be featured more in the sequel :) Than you again for your review! :)

 Report Review

Review #19, by MissesWeasley123 XV. The Next Adventure

22nd August 2013:
I finally finished! Ral, this was amazing! The twists in this...

Smith! Who would have thought! I loved it, he was just so evil though and it made me cringe! I wanted to crucio him so, so badly!

Everything with Rose running into Scorpius and kissing him.. Awe :D That was so cute! How do you manage to do it!?

I loved this, again the little things just made it so perfect. Penelope, Parvati, the bit about Moody - everything. This was such a rollicking ride of fun and such a fascinating read that had me on the edge of my seat until the very end.

I mean, SMITH? Wow... I'm still trying to mull that one over :P

I can't wait to get started on the sequel, and would just like to finish off this review by saying this:

You are a great author, never stop writing m'dear! Thank you for such a wonderful read!
Nadia
(I'm very sad that the submit review and read next chapter box doesn't show up... guess I'll have to make do with the sequel!)

Author's Response: Awww! Thank you so much, dear! I honestly can't remember the moment when I decided Smith would be the bad guy. I think I just browsed through members of the D.A. and he just seemed capable of doing this.

I actually have no idea where all the romantic, over the top moments come from. I think they sneak up on me while I'm sleeping and my cynical side is dormant. Literally. :)

Thank you so much for all your lovely reviews, Nadia! I hope you enjoy the sequel!


 Report Review

Review #20, by MissesWeasley123 XII. Sober Truths

22nd August 2013:
I'm back for more!

I absolutely love how you put Belle and Sirius in this! It was perfect! Though I haven't finished BTF and... *sigh*

Rose, the overthinker! She's such a Hermione. And Scorpius - I love how he uses Draco to show Rose that Scorpius is much stronger than his father. I like how you added that bit in there!

Again Ral, your characterization as an author is applaudible! That's always a biggie for me, the characters have to be believable, and Rose and Scorpius are just that!

I'm sorry for this short review, but I just couldn't resist!
:)

Author's Response: I love BTF! It's my official head!canon and Jami was nice enough to let me take her OC out for a ride.

Scorpius is not like Draco, not in the least, and as we've seen throughout this story, the fact that he isn't like him gives him a lot of trouble. And now with Rose, the troubles go deeper than just work stuff.

I'm actually so happy to hear that you like the way the characters are built. I have spent so much time with this story already, with these characters, in this universe, that they are real to me. I know their reactions, how they would behave in certain situations. It's been almost one year since I started writing this.

Thank you so much for the review!


 Report Review

Review #21, by MissesWeasley123 XI. Drunken Minds

22nd August 2013:
Hello Ral! I just couldn't resist leaving a review on this one, though I had initially just planned to read until the very end and then leave a review but, meh, now I'm here!

GAH! The Peverell Society! So mysterious! I'm still pondering on how you came up with this plot.. It's so engrossing.

I could really feel Scorpius' internal torture over the girl's death. I think you wrote it beautifully. We don't usually see strong male characters break down and you wrote it so believably... I'm still reeling from what I read.

The ending! They're so young to be in the middle of all this murder. I'm so glad they finally got to be young and whole, and just enjoy life forgetting for a moment that they both are at risk.

I loved the re-establishment of the Order that you showed in this!

I can't wait to finally find out who this guy is, he seems very clever and shrewd. Hopefully Rose can crack the case!
Nadia
P.S. I still sheep ScoRose. I always shall sheep them. BAA.

Author's Response: Sheeping ScoRose is good! Never stop sheeping! Hahahaha!

The scene in this chapter was one of the first that popped into my mind, when I started on the story. And as it goes with scenes you think too much about, it was more dramatic and smooth in my mind. So I'm happy it made an impact!

Sometimes, I feel like all of this action and drama and everything takes away from the fact that they are young. They are young adults in their 20s, trying to make sense of life and everything that goes on and I wanted to underline that.

Thank you for the review Nadia!


 Report Review

Review #22, by MissesWeasley123 VIII. Rose's Tale

9th August 2013:
Hey Ral!

So, after freaking out in our PM over at the forums...

Poor Rosie :( I really feel for her. I find Hermione's reaction to Rose's choice in career very believable. It seems very in character for her to freak out, since she's a big over achiever. I hate when parents do that to kids though.

You mentioned Al a couple of chapters ago... and how he's in CANADA! A Potter in CANADA!? Where.Is.He. I want to know.

This was the one where you got that.. uh.. review. Let me just say, that this story is very realistic, and I can totally view it as a sequel. :)

The ScoRose "sheep" shall never say BAA! Okay, lame use of that but, it really is cute ;)

Off to read the next!
Nadia

Author's Response: Oh another one where we sheep ScoRose :D

I've always pictured Hermione as the sensible one and I think she understands better than Rose ever could what an obsession with a magical object does to you. And of course Rose would never understand what her mother fears so much.

Thank you for the review, Nadia! :)


 Report Review

Review #23, by MissesWeasley123 V. Potter Manor/The Burrow

29th July 2013:
I absolutely loved the last line! It made me laugh out loud and my parents are staring at me like I'm crazy :)

I really liked Rose's explanation of the wands in the last chapter, she's very smart and I'm really liking her character as well.

Ron is bang on, you have his character down perfectly and his comedic touch is likable.

Ahhh this is by far the best mystery fic I've read in a while!
-Nadia

Author's Response: I loved that line as well! I was giggling so bad after I wrote it, like a crazy person!

Rose is... complicated, as you will see as the story unfolds! But she has good and bad in her and she just wants to do her best!

I am happy you liked Ron! I love him, he is one of my favorite characters and I am so happy you think I nailed his description!

Thank you for the lovely review!


 Report Review

Review #24, by MissesWeasley123 II. Parvarti Patil

27th July 2013:
All these Order members turning up dead! This was a really good chapter and I only found one mistake and that was "Parvarti" when her name is actually just "Parvati"

Great chapter though Ral!
-Nadia (I'm not logged in at the mo)

Author's Response: I got the name mixed up but I didn't go back and edit it! I'll do that someday!

Thank you! :)


 Report Review

Review #25, by MissesWeasley123 I. Dedalus Diggle

26th July 2013:
Hey Ral!

You mentioned that you'd just finished this... and I love it! This is so well written, I'm such a sucker for mystery. I absolutely love Scorpius' character, I think he's very cool. I can't wait to continue reading. I'm loving Teddy as well, he seems pretty awesome.

Author's Response: Thank you Nadia! I'm happy you liked it! Your reviews just made my day!

 Report Review
If this is your story and you wish to respond to reviews, please login

<Previous Page  Jump:     Next Page>