This is definitely a twist I've yet to see in a fic! I think you really did well displaying the emotions that are held between the guide dog and owner. My blind friend has a dog and this seems kind of like that, different obviously, but the relationship I think is similar.
Being as she is deaf, this story really gives the chance for some rich visual descriptors, play it up! What does she look like? You could also go to town on feel. What does the sand feel like? etc.
I feel like this would help flesh out your character a bit, to let the reader know more what it's like to be deaf. When one sense is lost, the others generally heighten to compensate for it, so I really think adding in some descriptors of the other sensory details would add tremendously to this already quaint little story.
Very well done, I enjoyed this piece! :)Author's Response: Thanks so much for the review, I'm glad you liked my story :) I'll look in revising this and adding more about the other senses, but I'm glad you liked my portrayal of the relationship between Dom and Joey.
Thanks for the review :) Report Review
Wow, its amazing what you can do with no dialogue and some beautiful writing! This was so good...because it was so simple. There wasn't any conflict, no sudden plot twist or surprise ending, no tortured thoughts, just one moment among millions of Dominique's life. Its so sweet, it makes me think of my own family. And your description of the ocean is fantastic--I can almost feel it! I love the ocean so much :) I also love the dog, I had a lab and they are the best! Just a lovely little one shot you have here!
-KathrynAuthor's Response: Thank you! I wanted it to be as simple as possible, basically a snapshot of Dominque's life :)
I also wrote this while on holiday at the seaside, right next to the beach, so it was very much the right time to write this.
Thanks so much for the review! Report Review
I think that was a really sweet one shot, it was interesting and different, I really enjoyed reading it. Especially the bit at the end about Dominique's version of perfection, it was really good!!
~CharAuthor's Response: Thanks so much, I'm glad you liked it. I was trying to put a positive spin on her disability, so I'm very happy you enjoyed this.
Thank you for the review! :) Report Review
OMG!!! I love this so much!!! Its really cutesy and nice and makes you feel all warm and fuzzy, but sad as well!!! GAH!!! Its just brilliant!! I dont know how to describe it!!! GAH!!! Speechless!Author's Response: This review just made my day! Thank you so so much! xx Report Review
I like it. The lack of dialogue doesn't hurt the story in the least, but I really love the way you went about it. It's nice to look at things like deafness in the wizarding world and think they may not be curable there either, magic still has it's limits (just ask Hermione, she'll tell you).
I loved Joey, such a wonderful character, usually pets are relegated to messengers or bit parts that never really truly show their natures or souls, but I think you give us a good long look at how wonderful Joey is. And the imagery of him laying in the sea is excellent. in fact all of your imagery was fantastic.
Thank you review comp, I may never have come across this fic on my own and now I'm really glad I did, it's such a wonderful little glimpse into the life of Dominique. And I thoroughly enjoyed it.
TyrannicFeenixAuthor's Response: Thanks so much! I'm glad you liked it, I was worried about the lack of dialogue, but I wanted to do it in a different way other than a stream of conciousness.
I personally love my dog when she's not being moody, so I did want to give my Joey a bigger part.
Thanks so much for the review! Report Review
Jenny :O This is beyond cute.
I love the fact in this that Domnique is deaf in this because it adds things which generally aren't around very much in fanfiction. The idea of her putting her hand to the floor to feel the vibrations is very realistic as it is what a lot of deaf people do to hear so I think you showed that exceptionally well.
I also liked the fact that she used a dog to help her just as many deaf people in muggle society do as they are sort of a lifeline for them so I like the way you seemed to make her almost dependant on the dog, particularly when she meets the new people. I understand her not liking meeting new people on her own as she wouldn't be able to speak or understand them so they could think she was being rude.
Photographs seems to work so brilliantly as a title because Domnique is right, her sight gives her all of the image she needs. Her world is so complete even without the sound and I liked that she was content with that. Well done Jenny!Author's Response: Thanks so much Summer, I'm so glad you liked my fic.
I wanted to show Dominique as happy in her silent world, even though she still very much has a disability and is dependant to some extent on her dog, so I'm very happy that came through in my writing.
Thanks for the review! Report Review
Wow, this was very moving and unique. A good way to take on a non-dialogue challenge, too. I loved your description throughout the entire piece. I could perfectly imagine everything...from the fresh air coming from the sea and Joey running around. Wonderful. i envy people who can describe things with such ease.
This is one of those stories that's lovely because of the little things. Like how Dominique has the connection with her dog. Like the smiles from her parents and all. I loved how since she was deaf, her other senses were pivotal for her and you described that flawlessly.
The end was amazing and it actually made me also a little sad to imagine it all. But I really liked the optimism with which Dominique seemed to be grasping the issue.
Really, there's nothing more I can say. It was simple and lovely and I liked it very much. Thank you for sharing. :)Author's Response: Thank you so much, and I hope your ankle gets better soon :( once my ankle swelled up to the size of one of those mini footballs and it was really painful, so I feel for you.
This wrote itself for me, and I wrote it in one sitting, trying to imagine what it would be like to be deaf (I was at the seaside too, so that may have influenced me).
I've always prided myself on dialogue, so this description was a real challenge and I'm so glad you liked it. I wanted the overall feel to be happy and optimistic, so I'm glad that came through.
Thank you so much for the review! *huggles* Report Review
Dude, where have you been? I haven't seen you online for so long and I even visited your MTA! I left you questions...please answer them. :(
I thought this is a really neat and simple story. At first, I was a bit lost for some reason, but I soon caught up and I finally realised that Dominique was deaf. Its kind of sad on how she's missing out on the simple things like sound, she can't even hear her own dog's bark. Aw. I feel so sorry for her.
I thought you wrote the story nicely, its simple and neat. I like simple, because its not complicated. ;) You were a bit poetic there, weren't you? I like the 'twist' in here. Very clever. Your descriptions were awesome. The story is so rich with them, right from the very begging until the very end! It was absolutely lovely! ♥
Izzy xxAuthor's Response: IZZY!
I love you, and I'm sorry I haven't been around! Holidays and schoolwork and stuff :(
I felt really sorry for Dominique too. Going deaf or blind is one of my greatest fears :(
Thanks so much for the review Izzy! Love you :) Report Review
Hi, you're skype bffl here.
And you rock my boat.
And I read this story before, and its beautiful.
You poetic, wordy genius.
MazAuthor's Response: Thanks Maz, you're awesome and a genius as well.
Thanks for the review! :) Report Review
This was really awesome, Jenny, using the lack of dialogue this way. Was very unique and different to see.
Sam.Author's Response: Thanks! I'm glad you liked it, and thanks for the review! :D Report Review
Terms of Service
categories & genres
short story collection