It's a really nice touch to have all of the prefects and teachers on watch to make sure that none of the students sneak out, or throw parties.
I think my favourite part of this was when Neville appeared, I was waiting for him to take the sword himself and do some reminiscing.
This is quite a fluffy one shot and I did really enjoy it, but it did feel a bit rushed at places and although it was a nice touch to have the Patronus appear, I was a little confused as to why it had appeared. Was it because Sarah had referred to James as 'Lassie'?
Other then that it was a really funny one shot, especially having James running around pretending to be 'Zorro'.
I wonder if they will get back to the office before Neville? Report Review
Hey Jenny! Sorry it took so long to review your challenge entries; I really wanted to take the time to leave a nice, long review and I didn't really have the opportunity before now.
To start, I really liked how you wrote this in present-tense, I've tried writing like that before and I personally think it's harder than past, so nice job on that! You really managed it well, and it didn't feel choppy or awkward at all.
This. Was. Hilarious. I love reading funny one-shots, which is why I created this challenge; they don't take a lot of time to read, I don't have to read through pages of descriptions and introductions, and I get to laugh really hard without reading any angst, when generally accompanies any novel. This story was enjoyable because of the above reasons, but you also went up and out with your characterization (which was remarkably good for only 1528 words) and your witty banter.
My favorite quote was probably:
"'You are completely insane,' I pant.
'I think that’s relative,' says James. “Compared to, say, Bellatrix Lestrange, I’m completely normal.'"
I now have a new comeback. Thank you(;
The one thing I spotted was that you forgot to make the word "vagrant" plural when you wrote: “I will find vagrants and miscreant and rule-breakers, and I will make them beg for mercy!”. That's really all though(:
Thank you for entering my challenge!
Live Life Large(:Author's Response: Thanks for such a lovely review :)
I'm glad you liked my characterisation, and I try so hard to make things funny, so I'm happy that worked out! Thanks for the challenge, and I'll edit that typo soon! Also, that's one of my favourite lines too :)
Thanks for the review! Report Review
JENNY! YAY! YOU PUBLISHED IT! WOOHOO! THIS IS A CAUSE OF CELEBRATION AND WE CAN CELEBRATE BY TYPING IN BIG LETTERS! YAAAY!
I love this. I love love love love love it! I loved this story before it was even published! ♥ and I love the author too... ;)
You should totally follow-up the story after your exams, I bet so many people will love that! You are such a great writer especially with humour. I think you'd do great with humour *hint* HUMOUR *hint*
James is such a lovely character and I just love how you came up with the idea of him stealing the Gryffindor's Sword and may I just say that I have NO problem at all imagining James skipping down the halls of Hogwarts waving the sword in his hand like the crazy guy he is. Completely adorable!
Anywho, you are awesome and you are completely lovely! Great job with being awesome! And thank you for mentioning me, though I never really did much! :P
Izzy xxAuthor's Response: I KNOW! YAY! THANKS SO MUCH FOR HELPING ME AND FOR THE LOVER-LY REVIEW! *huggles*
I'm glad you liked the final product, and I shall look into extending it... maybe :P
Thanks so much! xx Report Review
Ahahaha. Jenny, this was absolutely hilarious! How could you?!?! How am I supposed to compete with the sheer hilarity and awesomeness of this? I bow down to the Queen of.. well, the Queen of something. Technicalities! Anyway, Sarah and James were utterly goofy and brilliant and just all-around awesome friends, and I love how he's a Prefect. And his Patronus is just a bunch of aww.. This was a lovely, utterly smashing one-shot that was a lovely read.
- LinnAuthor's Response: *blushes* thank you so much, Linn, I'm glad you liked it, and I can't wait to read your entry!
Thanks! :D *hugs* Report Review
Oh, James. You are hilarious and I love you for it. :D
This was so good, Jenny. I just couldn't stop laughing. I love the friendship between James and Sarah, with their banter and insults; feels very natural.
This was great. Good luck in the challenge. :)
Sam.Author's Response: SAMSAMSAMSAM! I think you live on the Recently Added list O.o
Thank you so much, I'm glad you thought it was good :)
Love you! Report Review
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