Reading Reviews for Outcast
  
8 Reviews Found

Review #1, by AlAndAl 5 years, 14 hours, and 45 minutes

29th August 2012:
Ou! Intense family quarrels! I feel horribly for Lily. Her family is just so torn apart because of that stupid hat (Admit it, no one really likes the sorting hat...he sings dumb songs and puts you in crap houses. Is the hat even a he? Do hats have genders?) sorry got a bit off topic there. Anyways, awesome story, I can wait for more :))

-Allie

Author's Response: I feel terrible for Lily too... which just goes to show you how I love beating my characters up and then feel guilty afterwords.

But anyway, I don't really like the Sorting Hat, to be honest! He goes inside your head and picks out all your secrets, and I hate writing him (it?).

Thanks for the review!!

~Delia


 Report Review

Review #2, by AlAndAl One word; two baited breaths; three syllables

28th August 2012:
I like Ivy! She just tells it how it is. Haha my best friend has the same quality.
This story is so unique (trust me I've read loads of next gen fics) and I feel like it's going to get interesting soon. So I'll continue reading :)

-Allie

Author's Response: I love Ivy. She's my favorite character. Lily's second, but Ivy's my fav. Thanks! I really tried to think up something new for this, and the idea just stuck with me :)

 Report Review

Review #3, by sarah 5 years, 14 hours, and 45 minutes

24th August 2012:
please update soon, great chapter and the story sounds great so far. 10/10

Author's Response: Yay! Lily gets love! I'm working on the next chapter right now, and hopefully I'll update soon. Thanks!

 Report Review

Review #4, by Cavell One word; two baited breaths; three syllables

26th May 2012:
I feel so sorry for Lily - sure, there's nothing wrong with Slytherin, but the way her family treated her was just awful. Thank goodness she has Ivy to cope with it. This was such a nice start to the story, and I seriously can't wait to read more. 10/10

Author's Response: Thank you! Chapter 2 is almost ready, so you shouldn't have to wait long :)

 Report Review

Review #5, by marlita1311 One word; two baited breaths; three syllables

26th March 2012:
internet cookies?haha
what's your fav?
but i'm getting off topic; overall i think it's a nice start.
You have laid out the set of the story, introduced ur characters and it's nice to read a lilly story instead of the usual Rose/Scorpio story :)
update soon i'd love to read some more!!
~marlita

Author's Response: Thank you!

 Report Review

Review #6, by AlphaD One word; two baited breaths; three syllables

3rd March 2012:
I liked it - such an interesting idea for a story, I don't think anyone would ever dream of Lily being in Slytherin. I can't wait to read more but I will suggest better proofreading - there were some grammar mistakes and some things that were just redundant (i.e.: Albus looked stunned. Like he couldn't believe it. -- I would have just said Albus looked stunned, because generally when someone is stunned it's implied that they can't believe something has happened.) But really, A for effort and write more! (:

Author's Response: Yeah, I know the grammer is majorly sucking on this chapter. Both times I've edited I've been rather quick about it--not really thorough. I'm planning on devoting this weekend to major edits once my dad gets my Microsoft Word working again :) But thanks for the feedback anyway!

~Delia


 Report Review

Review #7, by Redvines714 One word; two baited breaths; three syllables

23rd February 2012:
I really like this story! I can see it become very good! I hope you update it soon! Oh and a wee bit of 'critiscm'? More like a helpful hint I guess.. look over your story before you publish it - there were a few obvious grammer/spelling mistakes.
Oh and it would be easier for us to read if you put each thing someone says on a new paragraph. So instead of
"Blah blah" Ron said "blah blah" Lilly replied..
Do something more like:
"blah blah" Ron said.
"blah blah" lilly replied.
If that makes sense? It's just easier for us all to read. Unless you were going for the whole Jonathan Safran Foer writing style. If so then your officially awesome, if not.. your still awesome.. Okay now I'm just rambling.. sorry.. hah

Author's Response: First of all, thank you. You are one of my first reviewers on this story, and you went above and beyond with your review.

Okay, now I sound like my math teacher. But anyway, yeah, I didn't really have much time to look this over before I got it in the queue. But now I have more time...so editing is to come.

That does make sense. I have noticed that's easier to read when I read fanfiction, so I don't know why I haven't been doing it.. :) That's one of the changes I will be making to all my stories now.

Thanks again!

~Delia


 Report Review

Review #8, by Echogirl One word; two baited breaths; three syllables

19th February 2012:
Love it! Please write more I'm liking the twist on it:)

Author's Response: Thanks! :)

 Report Review
If this is your story and you wish to respond to reviews, please login