This is so emotional!! I can almost see George moping around the burrow or wandering the castle just taking in all of the memories. I love how you captured his apprehension at being able to survive without Fred. That is something that I think would be incredibly hard for a twin, but most especially for them since they were always together for everything they did. I absolutely LOVE this line: "The heart has been bombed out of Hogwarts." It is not only incredibly descriptive, but I feel it tugging at my heart more so than anything. Great job!!! Report Review
This is beautifully and hauntingly written. Fred was always one of my favorite characters, and I found his death so sad, especially since poor George was left behind to continue on without him. They did everything together--I can't imagine what it was like for George to realize he was gone.
I always like stories like this, that describe something that was never really addressed in the books. To see how George dealt with the aftermath of his twin's death is something I always wanted in the books, and I think you did a very good job of it. It's refreshing to see that he's not completely devastated and has started to move on, because as sad as it was, staying depressed is unhealthy.
I especially liked the little italicized tidbits at the end of every section. It really showed how George was feeling, and my favorite would have to be: "The only person I've ever relied on was you, Fred". I just found that so heartbreaking.
Poor George. :( Lovely writing, though. Keep it up!
Bri, xxAuthor's Response: Yeah, I was very sad while writing this :P It was for a challenge where the focus was on 'one' and I immediately thought of poor George, all alone. But of course I couldn't leave it all sad, I don't want George to be depressed for the rest of his life either :) Thanks for the review, glad you enjoyed it :D Report Review
Awww, I always felt bad for George after Fred left, but that just makes it so depressing. Loved the last line it was really sweet. Well done, fantastic one shot!!
~CharAuthor's Response: Thanks- I think! :P I did try to make this sad, but sadness isn't one of my strong points. Again, I was trying to make a positive side come through in this one-shot.
Thank you very much for the review! :) Report Review
Decided to review since I was podcasting this and it's amazing! I was reading it and I was thinking "This is so awesome! And Sad." It really hit with those thoughts placed throughout the story! Great story! :D
Mike.Author's Response: Thanks so much, Mike. I'm glad you liked the story, and thank you so much for podcasting it! :D Report Review
Oh Jenny, I loved this too!! How do you write such amazing things? Again, I couldn't take my eyes off it! I was on the verge of tears the whole way though! You had me from the first sentence!
I was drawn to read this just by the summary! I don't know why, but I just love reading about George after Fred's death, it's just so full of emotion and sadness, and it kind of helps with my mourning of Fred since I really loved him as a character!
I love how you have the bits of writing in italics showing that he is talking to Fred! It made the story have even more of an impact!
I also love how you have George visiting all the places he's been with Fred, thinking about all the amazing memories and things they did together. It adds that essence of sadness that brings stories like this to life!
The part about Hogwarts having its heart bombed out..I just..want to cry. The centre of hope, of love, of pure awesome getting taken away because of one man. I .. it's not fair! I'd never thought that could happen, but you have made it seem like it could, like Hogwarts could just die at any point. Sure, it will come back to life slowly, but so many people were effected by what happened that it would make it so much harder!
Back to the beginning of this, that first section really showed how broken George was, how he could never be the same again! And that kills me inside! When you think of George, you place Fred with him, but not any more. George is alone..it's not fair! I loved the jigsaw analogy! It just made so much sense, but gave me a new wave of sadness at the same time!
Again, I'm making no sense! I'm just trying to convey all my feelings about this and failing! It was just so amazing! I loved it so much!!Author's Response: Hello again :)
Aww, I'm sad I nearly made you cry, but happy too. I'm glad you liked it! The bits where George was talking to Fred was hard to write, and thinking of meaningful places, but I'm glad you liked it, as well as the imagery in the Great Hall.
Thanks for a fantastic review x Report Review
This was a very very touching piece. It was heartbreaking, yet beautifully written. I loved the way you crafted George's emotions, they were so real, it nearly made me cry. All the little memories, all those places, all those thoughts, they were put beautifully together. I also loved the comparison with the jigsaw. You did a great job writing this one. Amazing work really.
~Recenseo~Author's Response: Thanks, I'm so happy you enjoyed it. George losing his twin always seemed to me the biggest tragedy in DH, and I'm glad you thought I did it justice.
Thank you very much for the review :) Report Review
Very enjoyable read and so sad, well done : )Author's Response: Thank you for reading and reviewing, I'm glad you liked it :) Report Review
Oh my gosh, the last line almost made me cry! This was just so beautfiully written! It's like, a masterpiece in writing! You captured the emotion and the decription so perfectly. I'm just so speechless! *Added to favorites.*Author's Response: I'm glad you liked my writing, thank you very much for reading and reviewing xx Report Review
*rocks in a corner, crying*
This was amazing, the way you combined the comedy and the 'AH THIS IS SO SAD :(:(:(:(' factor was great. Loved some of the jokes, they genuinely made me laugh out loud, which doesn't happen to often when surfing the internetAuthor's Response: HELLO!
Yeah... comedy has to be injected into everything because sadness is too sad :(
I'm so very glad you like it :P Thanks for the review! xx Report Review
Hi! You're tagged!
Sorry if it took a little while though, my computer stopped working for some obscure reason but now it's alright (but for how long???).
I really liked this piece, it was so touching. George's journey to finding himself without Fred was beautifully written. I love how you made him go through different places that all remind him for his brother. The part in their room was my favorite though; just imagining him alone there, in this small bedroom where they have spent most of their lives, it broke my heart.
This piece flowed very nicely and was very clean, I didn't spot anything wrong. I really liked it even though it, once again, reminded me that Fred is gone... Good job :)Author's Response: 'ello :D
Best wishes to your computer- feed it chicken soup? :S
I'm very glad you liked this piece, and I'm very happy that you felt emotionally involved with it as well- it was my first time writing anything sad :(
Thanks for the review xx Report Review
Okay, do you have any reason why I have not reviewed this amazing thing before?! NO? Well, here I am then. I was actually waiting for HAT (hehe) but then I saw this and was like, hmm, so there is actually something starryskies55 has written that I havent read. Strange, really strange.
Anyway, that was all irrelevant and I will get on with it. IT WAS BEAUTIFUL! Please note that that is not a word I often use to describe your writing- so this goes to show how versatile you are as an author and its amazing...(see that kick-ass alliteration there?) Okay, back to the point: It was so sad, and beautiful and full of emotion and JUST SO DAMN AMAZING, that I almost cried. Right, I did cry, but thats just cause I am a sissy and all PMS teenager right now. Either way, it was sooo good!
The last line was all: N'aaaw and the whole this was just so sad! FRED WAS MY FAVOURITE! Wahhh!
Okay, now I am just gushing. Pull yourself together.
What I suppose I have been trying to say is that this is just plain beautiful. The way you showed the emotions was very powerful and the whole thing flowed amazingly and it was... enchanting.
I completely and utterly adored it. Loved it. Was captured by the strong feelings and the perfect balance and flow.
Uh. Right. I think I will stop now before I say something weirder.
-Kerryn xxAuthor's Response: Why is it my fault? :(
HAT should be here today or tomorrow! NEVER FEAR! Although I'm glad you like all my stories :D
I do see the alliteration, and I thankee muchly for it. I'm so very glad you like this little one-shot, and I'm sorry it made you cry. PMS is the worst :(
Thank you for the review, and long time no PM? xx Report Review
I really liked the idea of George taking a trip down memory lane by actually visiting each location that Fred and him had been together. It was a nice way for him to say goodbye to someone who was so important to him, and I liked how you decided to portray the way George is feeling during the story. However I have to say that there were a lot of fragmented sentences and the grammar could use some work. The transitions from scene to scene could be a bit smoother.
Overall I liked the story enough to over look any grammar issues. Good job.Author's Response: Yeah, the literal trip down memory lane :D I'm glad you liked that.
Thanks for the criticism, although I will say that I mostly intended for the fragmented sentences to convey the story as if it was George's thoughts.
Thanks for the review, and I'm glad that overall you liked it :D Report Review
I always adore stories like this and yours didn't let me down. I really enjoyed it. You write George really well. This was emotional and really hard hitting as times, you're an excellent writer and I really like your style. You write Georges heartbreak really well. This was just beautiful. I really like the idea of this aswell. The last line was perfect, I loved it and it really summed it up well. Thanks for this, I really enjoyed reading it.Author's Response: Thank you very much, I'm glad you like my version of George's grief. Thanks for the review :) Report Review
I'm here with your review as promised for the 'One Challenge to Rule Them All!" I absolutely loved this piece, I love stories about George trying to figure out how he's supposed to live without Fred, and this was no exception, it was beautifully written, and of course it was sad, I was actually nearly in tears. To have him finally accepting Fred's death at the end was a really nice touch, and his movement from not knowing what to do, to having some idea on how he was supposed to survive his grief was well written and portrayed so well. It seemed entirely within character for him, because really, he's lost his other half, I'm sure it would nearly kill him as well, and you've portrayed this so well.
I really love the writing style as well, while the bold lines were rather distracting (for some reason I always look directly at the bold lines), they were some of the most sad and beautiful lines in the entire story, so perhaps it's a perfect thing that they caught my attention so many times. In particular "Do not pity the dead, pity the living, someone once told me." It was just perfect, and fit the situation so perfectly, as did everything else being said. The descriptions too, were lovely and really helped set up the entire story, there certainly was this abandoned feeling to everything about the story, which made it feel so much more empty and alone for George.
I noticed a few awkwardly worded sentences and small grammatical errors, but overall it was a well written piece, and they certainly weren't something a quick beta couldn't fix up. I really enjoyed reading this, it was beautiful and a very good look into George's life following Fred's death and how he's had to come to terms with living without his twin brother. I think you've captured the situation perfectly! Well done! :)
~ In The Shadows I Dwell
(P.S: The winners will be announced very soon by blog, so look out for it!)Author's Response: Thanks! I'm glad you liked it, and YAY I PLACED THIRD! Just seen your blog :D That you thought my story was emotional really means a lot, and your comments are very much appreciated :D
I'll check up on those typos, and consider changing the bold to italics. I wanted them to stand out, but I don't want it that much!
Thank you very much... a very very good challenge :D Report Review
What a short and loving piece!
The places George travels each have their own meaning which is important to both him and Fred but the way you've written this is so emotional and heartbreaking that the emotion seeps through every single word.
I couldnt ever imagine losing my sister or any of my brothers really even though we're not that close so with Fred to lose a twin, a person he has shared every aspect of his life with is just so sad!
I like how in Grimmauld Place there was still little momentos, I had never really thought about the other people who had lived in that place so the fact that it had it's own little meaning to George and not just to the trio because they had spent so much of their summer there was just lovely.
I love the scene in Hogwarts with the detention room and with the great hall. The part that really got to me was when you said that Hogwarts's heart had been ripped out because with the great hall being the central point of Hogwarts it really was true as that wad the place with the most life.
The ending sentence was just so amazing and so heart warming because it showed George was coming to terms with his grief. You also showed that with the bold statements varying from feelings of being upset to feelings of acceptance.
A very loving pieceAuthor's Response: Thank you very much.
I'm glad that the emotion of the piece came through so strongly and it also made you think about your own life. I despise my brother most of the time, but I couldn't imagine life without his constant (sullen) presence :)
I tried to make everywhere have a little bit of the twins, even if it wasn't their own, like Grimmauld Place. I liked and hated writing the bit with the Great Hall, because it was nice to show the love for Hogwarts and horrible to say how destroyed it was.
I'm glad you like the ending too, the move to acceptance of Fred's death was very important to me. I didn't think George would be the type to hide away.
Thanks for the review xx
Tagging you from the Review the Person Above You thread in the common room.
This was really touching. George was definitely a "soft casualty" of the war: what he lost wasn't as plain as a death or an injury, but he paid an enormous price, nonetheless. His introspective journey through all of the locations that remind him of Fred made for a great read.
First off, I loved the jigsaw puzzle metaphor. Especially the part about what invariably happens to the pieces. It was a great way to start things off.
Fred's copy of the Monster Book was a clever little touch, but you've filled this chapter full of those. Returning to the room Fred shared with his brother felt really emotional, especially his plea to Fred not to let him turn into a recluse.
The Slinkhard book George finds in Grimmauld Place was another great, obscure little thing to pluck out of canon. Your memory is really good! The prank that Fred and George pull on Umbridge as they leave school is really their defining moment in the series, so it was nice that you made reference to it.
And then there was the scene in the castle. That was pretty hard to read. In nearly every other fic covering the immediate aftermath, Hogwarts is rebuilt fairly quickly. For the purposes of this story, I like that you've left it damaged. It's a good metaphor for where George is coming from.
Overall, this was a great little story. Very nicely written, free from any errors that I could find, and filled with feeling and emotion. Well done!Author's Response: Thank you so much. I couldn't believe that JK made Fred die, all I could think was that I wouldn't ever split up the twins.
I was trying to include as much references to familiar objects to canon like the books and Muggle stuff like the jigsaw, and I'm glad that came through.
Also, I always assumed they left Hogwarts in ruins for a bit, like a kind of memorial- they left James and Lily's house.
Thank you so much, it means a lot that you liked it. Report Review
Ah! Eeh! Oh!
I think my heart just flipped over in my chest and wrenched itself into a giant knot.
This is so beautiful! When I read the battle of hogwarts in the seventh book for the first time I started blubbering like a baby and curled into a fetal position on the couch (okay maybe that's a little bit of an exaggeration)
Well, this story just brought that moment back to mind and all the sad and tragic feelings came rushing back.
This one shot is golden and a perfect ode to the twinsAuthor's Response: Thank you. It was one of the saddest moments of DH for me, and I couldn't believe that JK had taken Fred away from George.
Thanks so much for the feedback, and for the review xx Report Review
This is beautiful (3 I've never really thought about george's reaction to Fred dying :( Honestly, fantastic. It made me really think about my sister and our bond. Thank you :) Emily x xAuthor's Response: Thank you very much :) I'm so glad you like it, and it's made you think. When I read DH, it was what killed me the most, George having to be alone :(
-Jenny xx Report Review
Oh my god. Seriously. Oh my god. This is so beautiful and I knew I was going to be sad reading it because it's about only 1/2 of the twins but I had to read it and I'm so glad.
I had always been half of a whole, and now, somehow, I had to fill the gap left by him all by myself. This. Actually, the whole darn thing. You chose to show the reminders of Fred, the small things that can get someone in grief and in loss and you communicated it all so well that I'm there, and I'm tearing up at the loss (which is saying something).
The words are beautiful, the images just heart-wrenching and I can't stand that George is alone. Your last line is beautiful too because it gives us a note of hope in all this sadness.
Favoriting!Author's Response: Thank you so much. It means so much that you liked it, and you thought it was emotional. I don't know what else to say, but thank you. I'm glad you liked it. Report Review
Fred's loneliness comes through well.
Nice jobAuthor's Response: Thank you... but I assume you mean George's loneliness. The challenge I wrote this for was on the theme of 'oneness' so I tried to make him as alone as possible.
Thanks for the review! Report Review
This was so cute. The ending was nice. "But I'm going to live for the two of us." Really nice one-shotAuthor's Response: Thank you! I'm glad you like it, and I always hated that Fred died... it was so sad. I couldn't imagine George on his own :'(
Thanks for the review! Report Review
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