Ive enjoyed this story immensely. I cannot wait to read Albus' version. It should be awesome. Report Review
This story is awesome!
I love how you throw the reader right in there, and it's a really engaging opening about the whole trunk fiasco! The choice of character is really original - I love the quirky thing about her dad's surname! That's really creative!
I love the character development, as well - she's a believable and relatable character, yet still unique in her own way! I love a good Albus Potter/Canon fan fic!
The description you add for her friends is brilliant - it helps us define each one individually - yet to doesn't overwhelm us. I liked the way you made Molly so much like Uncle Percy as well!
I think this is so humorous! The group dynamics are very believable, which makes the comic delivery classic! What helped with the group dynamics, is the anecdotes too- it gave the group a real sense of history, and made them seem stronger as friends, and much more realistic.
The snappy dialogue really grabs your attention, and Katie's really funny.
I like how Rose isn't the typical cliche - you portrayed her in a inventive new way, that I haven;t really seen before - the same goes for Al. Plus, you left us hanging on a huge cliffhanger! So excited for the next chapter!
Overall, a really imaginative and compelling piece, with a great bunch of characters, a nice riveting yet steady pace, and I can't wait to see how the plot unfolds! :)Author's Response: Thanks for reviewing! I'm pleased you like the story so much.
Hehehe the surname thing came about because I wanted her to be Katie Bell's daughter and I'd written a few chapters with her as Lucy Bell and then I realised it was her mother's maiden name so I came up with the whole 'Smellie' thing. I thought it would be sort of unique :)
Thank you for all your compliments on my writing, I like to think I've come a long way since starting this story but it's fun to look back at these early chapters and see where it all started. These characters have become such a big part of my imagination.
I hope you've continued to read the story and I'd love to hear your thoughts on the rest of the story. Thanks again! :) Report Review
that was SO AMAZING, an obvious 10/10. The name you chose for Lucy is so perfect (almost as perfect as molly(not her name but her character ))! You should definitely keep writing but you should not write a sequel, as shakespeare once said about a work of literature, there is no need for an epilogue for "it need no excuse"! I love your writing it is so realistic and funny and positively genuine. You are amazing. Keep writing!Author's Response: Thank you very much, I'm glad you enjoyed the story. I've put the sequel I had planned for this on hold for now, although I have been writing the story from Al's perspective. My thoughts of a sequel were never really because I felt the story was unfinished, but rather because I loved working with these characters and wanted to write some more with them. However I'm more focussed on some very different pieces at the moment, both to do with the aftermath of the war. Feel free to check them out on my author page if you'd like :)
Thanks again for reading and reviewing! Report Review
I was genuinely sad as I finished this story. It was so fantastic, exactly the type of story I like to read. Lucy was the perfect character to use to tell this story. I really really hope you make the sequel. Amazing story just as I said in my review on Human Nature! I can't wait to hear the end from Albus. (I think I also have a small crush on him).Author's Response: I'm really glad you enjoyed the story, I had so much fun writing it. Lucy was great fun to write and how could you not have a crush on him? lol! Keep reading and I'll try to update soon :) Report Review
This is such an awesome story, I loved the characters :)
I also love that you made Lucy really good at Care of Magical Creatures, because I havent really read one where someone actually excels in that subject :)
Its so cute
This is a wonderful story :)
-iatevoldysnoseAuthor's Response: Thanks for the review, I'm thrilled that you like the story so much. I thought the Care of Magical Creatures thing would make a good point of difference, after all there's kids in the muggle world who love working with animals, so why not in the magical world?
Thanks again :) Report Review
Hi! I just signed up for this site but I've been reading here for a while. I really love this story! I thought you did a wonderful job. The characters are so well written and their interaction with one another is so good! I thouht you wrote Albus so well and Lucy is just adorable. Great job!Author's Response: Thanks so much, I'm glad you enjoyed the story :) Report Review
aww, ALBUS IS FEELING THE LUUURRRVVEE
anyway, i love this story. its funny and cute and absolutely ADORABLE and im practically addicted :)Author's Response: Aw thanks, I'm glad you enjoying the story so much :) Thanks for reviewing! Report Review
OMG!!! My birthday is 23 of February too!!! Ooh my gosh, how cool! Yeah okey, gonna keep on reading, love this story;)Author's Response: lol...how funny about your birthday! Thanks so much for reading and reviewing! Report Review
I cannot even describe how much I've liked this story. I was up until 1 am doing my homework yesterday(or today?) because I just couldn't stop reading. I've read all of it in an afternoon, I'm just missing the epilogue. I really love your characters, specially Albus.Author's Response: Aw thanks so much, I'm glad you like the story so much! Thanks for reviewing! Report Review
So I've decided to read all nominated stories before the voting begins and yours is the first on my list!
Love this story so far, the characters seem interesting and I can't wait to read some more!Author's Response: Thanks so much for reading and reviewing, I hope you enjoyed the story! Report Review
Cool! I love this chapter. I know this story is completed but i'm still going to review comments :) Can't wait to read more.
~LoVe_SiriusAuthor's Response: Thanks so much, I'm glad you liked it! Report Review
Loved this story, honestly so good. Read it in two days haha xAuthor's Response: Aw thanks, I'm glad you liked it! Report Review
is it okay for brothers to date sisters? if one couple got married the other would be related by law so..i did love this chapter though.Author's Response: I'm definitely sure there's nothing wrong with 2 brothers dating 2 sisters, and even if one set got married, there's no rule that you can't marry someone you're related to by marriage. Thanks for reviewing :) Report Review
I saw your latest next-gen Human Nature and thought it sounded good but then as it's this story from Albus' perspective I decided to read this first. Off to a good start :) I liked how Lucy compared her family to a Bat Bogey Hex and I'm definitely going to read the rest of the storyAuthor's Response: I'm glad you chose to read this story and I hope you enjoy it. Please let me know any other thoughts you have :) Report Review
LOVED IT! EVERY BIT OF IT!
You're an amazing writer, you portray the characters well and the interactions between them were superb. You got all the emotions spot on and the whole story just made keep on reading. I'm sitting here at midnight because I haven't been able to stop reading. So don't you dare stop writing, I'm looking for the sequel ASAP!Author's Response: Thanks so much for the lovely review. I'm very glad that you enjoyed the story so much :) Report Review
I truly enjoyed this story. I like the interaction between Lucy and Alive, and Al and James. Although, if you do a sequel, you might wanna choose a way to break up one of the two couples 'cuz come on would two sisters really date two brothers?Author's Response: Thanks so much for reviewing, I'm glad you like the story. Report Review
It's obvious that Albus likes her, but I can't help but feel that something further on might make her think otherwise???
Keep up the good work!!
padmoonyfoot7: over and out!!Author's Response: Thanks for reviewing, I'm glad you like the story. Report Review
Wow!! I had so much fun reading this story! I love how completely clueless the other characters are about each other. I am also a huge fan of Matters of the Hart, and I can't wait to see the next chapter in there. This is a random question but who is in your banners as Lucy? I feel like I should recognize her...Author's Response: I'm glad you enjoyed the story, I had a lot of fun writing it. The acress I've used to portray Lucy is Emma Roberts. She's in Hotel for Dogs, Wild Child and a few other movies I can't remember. Thanks for the review. Report Review
Wow, this was nice(:
its not like the typical love story. When all the stories are just like 'oh i'm invisible' but their not really invisible. -.-
but, in this story, it was actually realistic!(:
as much as i hate that albus doesn't 'see' lucy, im also pleased because it follows the story line, and makes sense. (:
or maybe this is just my conscience talking, because my crush sees through me.
you never know.
anyway so , the rest of the story was great, especially with the whole saying goodbye to the house thing. i do that too. i didn't know anyone else did(:
a great big 10/10 for you(:
~hana(:Author's Response: Thanks so much, I'm glad you enjoyed the story :) Report Review
This is the first story I've read on this site and I haven't been able to get away from it :o I'm incredibly impressed and the only issues I had were very minor grammatical ones which I can't really complain about because my grammar is terrible.
That can be proved by the fact that that last paragraph was all one sentence.
I have thogoughly enjoyed this story, it made me laugh and want to cry and I'm now going to go and do the work that I was supposed to be doing while I read this.
Daisy xAuthor's Response: I'm so glad you liked the story, I love writing and it makes me happy that other people can enjoy my writing too :)
Ugh...grammar/punctuation errors are the bane of my existence. No matter how many edits I do I always miss a couple and then I notice them one the story is posted and I think "No!" :)
I really am glad you liked the story, thanks so much for leaving a review too, I really appreciate it! Report Review
This was fantastic! You recently reviewed some of my stuff so I felt it would be good to read some of yours and I think this is amazing!!! It's loads better than mine, and it's really funny!
I really loved that you included Neville too, (he's my favourite character from the books) I always like it when people include him in their next gen stories. But the real stars were Lucy and Albus, I think you created their characters really well! I loved it!Author's Response: Aw thanks for coming along and reading the story, I can't believe you read the whole thing! :) I really like your story and I'm about to go leave you some more reviews, don't sell yourself short, your story is really great. Feel free to check out 'Human Nature' the companion story to this one.
Thanks for reviewing! Report Review
Ok well first of all i would like to say that i liked your story .But it sorta got a bit annoying when you started dragging it on and on. I was just thinking my god just kiss her already! I normally really hate romance fics i really think they're a bit too sappy. But this was was .. ok i guess. And secondly McGonagall is the Headmistress not Professor Sprout. Thnks for listeningAuthor's Response: Well I'm glad you decided to give my story a chance even thought you're not a romance fan. The decision to 'drag it on' as you say was actually very deliberate, because in a lot of romance fics the authors bow to public pressure and get the characters together far too soon and then the story gets all boring and falls apart. I also wanted two characters who are insecure to the point where they couldn't see the obvious, even if the readers can. So whilst I appreciate your opinions, that's why I chose to write this story the way I did.
Oh and also, you're mistaken about the headmistress thing. McGonagall was only headmistress during the 90's for approximately ten years or so after the war, but by the time Harry's kids went to Hogwarts she had retired. We don't know who was Headmistress/master after her so it's up to Next-Gen writers to make up their own mind about it. We know that Sprout isn't teaching Herbology anymore because Neville is there now, so I like the idea that she became headmistress, leaving her old position open. As I said, who actually preceeded McGonagall is unknown but it definitely wasn't McGonagall at this point.
Thanks for the review. Report Review
I LOVED IT! I LOVED LOVED LOVED LOVED LOVED LOVED LOVED IT! I JUST LOVED THE WHOLE THING SO MUCH! Jees I just can't stop smiling :D I loved this story and I'm so happy the Bells and the Potters are finally together; you made my day! BEST. STORY. EVER! 145/10Author's Response: I'm so glad you liked the story, I'm such a sucker for a happy ending :) Thanks for reading and reviewing! Make sure to check out the companion story I'm writing, Human Nature, it's from Al's POV :) Report Review
OMIGOD why can't they just get together already!? I hate and love her cluelessness at the same time :D I loved it so much! I can't wait to read the next chapter...! 10/10 for sureAuthor's Response: I'm glad you liked it, and yeah Lucy is a bit clueless isn't she? Thanks for the review! Report Review
Wow that's all I can say just wowAuthor's Response: Thanks, I'm glad you liked it :) Report Review
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