Oh my god Susan you terrible person why would you do this to me? I am the last person in the world who would ship Sirius and Lily BUT THIS FIC. THIS FIC. Wahh I'm just sitting here and my heart has gone all twisty and actually feeling things for this ship .___.
The writing is just perfect as always. It has a kind of melancholy tinge to it just makes it really angsty even (especially) when he's talking about the good times they had together. And Sirius' characterization in general is just amazing. It's really simply written but it evokes such strong feelings that will leave you lying dead on the floor.
Also I'm very happy that you use so much Orson Welles in everything :D This was amazing xxAuthor's Response: *flails* Meghna! I purposely went out and wrote a story that would be painful - that's the fun part of writing Sirily. It will always end badly, even worse than Snily because it leaves Sirius with awful guilt and suffering (Lily always seems to get out of these stories pretty easily... strange). This story turned out to be so incredibly painful that I don't know what section of my brain is came from - probably a place I don't to know anything about. O_o
It's awesome to hear that this story was so affecting, even more so because it's not a ship you like. But this story, unlike some of the other Sirily ones I've done, could apply to other characters - it's not rooted just to Sirius, Lily, and James, and I wonder if that's the key to making a story like this - with a controversial ship - work.
Thank you so much for this review! It's left me happy for many days - it means a lot to hear these fabulous compliments from you! :D And yes, Welles everywhere! It would be cool to write a story like he made a movie - if only images translated so well into words. :P Report Review
Aw, this is both sweet and sad at the same time! I never thought of Sirius/Lily, but now, after reading this, it seems fully plausible!
Good job. :)Author's Response: Thank you very much! It's fantastic to hear that my story has made you think about Sirily as a plausible thing - it's an interesting ship to explore (though it's got a lot of problems too, mind you) and it's certainly addicting to write. :D Report Review
Beautiful work :') It's written so nicely... Poor Sirius :(Author's Response: Thank you! It means a lot that you liked this story! ^_^ Report Review
I'm not usually a fan of Sirius/ Lily but this was fantastic.
I really enjoyed every aspect of this, I love Sirius and most stories have him as this light-hearted, serial playboy; but this is much closer to how I would think Sirius would work.
Well Done!Author's Response: Thank you very much! It's great to have readers who aren't Sirily shippers enjoying this story - I wasn't sure that would happen, especially with the way that I portrayed James, so it means a lot that you liked this story and thought that Sirius was accurately portrayed. ^_^ Report Review
I've read this story so many times, and it never loses it's magic. It's probably my all time favourite story on the site... I'm a L/J shipper, but whenever I read this I become a Sirily one... 10/10 and it's added to favourites :)Author's Response: Many times?! :O Oh my gosh, that's an amazing compliment in itself, thank you! Then you go ahead and add that you think it's the best story on HPFF?! :'O
I don't know what else to say except for a big, appreciative thank you! It's really wonderful to hear that you love this story. *huggles* Report Review
Hi! BrightStar here from the forums. I had meant to read one of your stories for a while now, after reading your blog. Why I chose a Sirius/Lily, I'll never know, but this really appealed to me!
I really loved this - it almost pains me to think of the relationship between lily and james as being less than perfect, but for some reason it made me like this even more!
There was one part I really liked-
"He’d caught me whistling a little tune, the same that we’d heard at the fair, not that he knew that. It came to mind whenever I thought of you those days (it does even now, though it’s too late to call you back from the dead), those happy days at the end of summer before our seventh year, the first and last decent summer I’d had."
So moving, well done!
The voice you've given Sirius is absolutely perfect. I've never been a huge fan, though I liked him, but you've really made me feel for him here - and dislike James, not easily done!
I really didnt like Lily here, who allowed herself to be "won" by these men, but then not everyone feels that they're in control of these things, or whatever.
Some of the speech, like the "old man" thing, would normally annoy me - I always get annoyed when people forget what time the maurauders lived in. However, it really worked here, capturing a similar kin of a feel as the third man.
Anyway, I really enjoyed this. This is an older story, so you may not see the review - but if you do, well done! I'm really glad I stopped by :)Author's Response: Oh wow, this is wonderful! Thank you so much! I'm very sorry for having taken too long to respond to this review, but even at the time, I remember being shocked and pleased that you took the time to read and review this story. It means a lot to hear from a great reviewer like you. ^_^
The presence of James is a very big issue with this ship that I still have - even though I enjoy writing Sirius and Lily together, I know that it always comes at the price of James. Either he has to be rather villainous, as he is in this story, or weak or otherwise out of the way - it's the only way that the best friend/girlfriend relationship can occur. It's horrible to admit this (because I like writing James, too), but I'm glad that I was able to make you dislike him in this story. He's rather sleazy and selfish, which I suppose corresponds with Snape's characterization of him, and it makes for a strange plot hole near the end - why on earth would Lily marry this guy? I still can't answer that question.
But Sirius is the focus of this story, as you've noticed. Even Lily, while she's being addressed the entire time, remains just out of reach - her characterization here is unsatisfactory to me, but I've never been able to write her to my satisfaction. It's wonderful that you like my portrayal of Sirius, though, and the fact that you don't usually like him makes your compliment even more amazing. ^_^
It's not that old a story, not for me. :P But anyway, thank you again for reading and reviewing this story! :D Report Review
I want to leave you these awesome reviews but every time I read your stories, I'm always at a loss for words. I remember reading parts of this fic for the Figment contest. I'm not a very big Sirius/Lily fan (you know this :P) but this story made me so sad. The ending especially was heartbreaking. That last line killed me! I think I might have said that on your Figment piece but it's true. I love the Marauders but it depresses me because they all end up dead and any happiness you can write for them, you know it's fleeting. I'm not a big fan of second person POV and this story was tolerable but I still don't like it very much except for that last line. I don't know...second person POV is something very intimate and in a way, that's how your story feels but at the same time it gives it a sort of disconnect. I can't really explain the feeling, sorry. :(
I love your writing though, as always. It's flawless and beautiful and your characterizations are fantastic. I love your Sirius - acknowledging that what he wants belongs to someone else but then at the end, saying if he had loved her, he would have saved her. So sad.
I'm pretty sure I'm rambling and this review makes no sense but like I said earlier, I have no idea what to say when I read your stories. I love your writing! :)Author's Response: They're so horrible that they make all the words in your head shrivel up, you mean? :P Maybe that's the problem I have with getting reviews, haha.
Just kidding, of course. Getting a review from you is a wonderful present, and it means so much that you read and reviewed something of mine. ^_^ You were the first reviewer here to shove me in the right direction, so I'm eternally thankful to you.
I realize now that a Sirily story may not have been the optimal suggestion for a Wolfstar shipper. XD It makes me wonder why I don't write Sirius/Remus (though I know the answer to that already: mine would never be as good as yours). However, it's fantastic that this story, even with the things that aren't to your usual taste, still affected you. I know a lot of people aren't for the second person, and even I'm still touch and go with it - it only suits certain stories, those that require a huge amount of intimacy with the reader. Sirius is confessing his heart to Lily in his madness, and it is, in a way, meant to make readers feel uncomfortable, like they're disturbing something. That's why the ending is so creepy - it suddenly reveals how the reader is intruding on this intensely private narrative. The reader isn't Lily, and that's where the disconnect you mentioned comes from - the story is meant for her ears, but she can never actually hear it.
I only came up with this explanation now, wow. The ending was one part I wasn't sure about because it's so abrupt and drastically switches the mood into this dark space of madness and suffering. I personally love that aspect of the Marauders - that there is always that darkness at the end. They're so transient, undergoing that tragic fall because, even though they had so much going for them, they were still human and flawed. The Marauders' story would make for a great play, whether Greek or Elizabethan. XD
Anyway, thank you for reading and reviewing. It's wonderful to hear from you! ^_^ Report Review
This is a very evocative, and beautiful story, I love the almost poetry of it! Fabulous!Author's Response: Thank you very much! It's fantastic to hear that you've enjoyed this story to such an extent. It means a lot that you have. ^_^ Report Review
Oh my goodness... This story is truly breathtaking...
I'm actually lying in my room with tears in my eyes!!
This is the first fic i've read that was Sirius/Lily and after this I don't think I'll ever stop reading them...
The way it was written was absolutely wonderful!! I loved how it was as if he was speaking directly to her and I loved how at the end we realise he's having all these thoughts from his cell.
I've said this many times before but this is one of the best one-shots that I have ever read!! And I assure you, it will take a miracle of a story to beat it.
Loved EVERYTHING about it!!
X Kayleigh xAuthor's Response: It made you cry?! Wow, that's far more than I expected this story to be capable of doing - I didn't think it would come out being so sad, certainly didn't intend it to be sad...
Your first Sirily? It's wonderful to hear that you'll be reading more of this ship - there are many, many great examples of it on HPFF - and that mine was good enough to make you want to read more. ^_^ I couldn't ask for more, that's for sure.
Thank you very much for your kind words. I really appreciate them! :D Report Review
Why?...how could he do that? how could he give up his love for his best friend? Why, Sirius? Why? Why did he do that? I just don't understand! He could have been happy! He could have been...so...! WHY!
Oh my god...
I'm sorry...that was dramatic.but it feels like my heart is wrenched into two.
That was truly brilliant. Everything, the format the style, the diction, the beautiful contrast of vague and detailed memories, the concept (3rd Man), and the end. Everything!
Two parts that I truly admire:
1) the comparison to Arthur and Lancelot, and how Lily says that he's not Lancelot, he's Sirius Black (and how he thinks 'in what way')--gosh that is beautiful
2)daisies, oh god...about how she didn't say out loud the 'loves me' 'loves me not'
This is the only story that has ever made me cry from that deep place in my body (do you know the one?).
Stunning.Author's Response: Oh wow! This review! Thank you very much for all your wonderful compliments - it's fantastic to hear that you've liked this story to such an extent and that it was able to invoke strong feelings. I can't explain how happy I am that this story had this effect on you. I never thought that this story would be able to do that, but it has, and I'm speechless.
It's so hard to understand what could have happened between James, Lily, and Sirius if the latter loved her just as much. There's that code of friendship that James expects Sirius to abide by, yet doesn't seem to think it applies to himself. James here is pretty arrogant, and Sirius submits to his will, perhaps driven by some unconscious knowledge that James and Lily were "meant to be" for a prophetic reason if nothing else. I don't understand it either - I don't know if there's any way to understand. Report Review
I love this story, the conflicting emotions and choosing friendship over love.
It's amazing, I can fully empathize with what Sirius is feeling and that's the mark of a good writer. Well done :DAuthor's Response: Thank you very much! It's great to hear that you enjoyed this story!
The problem with Sirily stories is that conflict between love and friendship. James and Sirius were so close that it makes writing the ship hard because it seems very OOC to have Sirius cheat with his best friend's girl. I'm glad, though, that he turned out to be empathetic rather than merely pathetic, which is always a worry with this ship. Report Review
Wow. This is a really beautiful story.
I saw golden autumn fields while reading this.
Amazing. I feel so sad for Sirius now.
10/10.Author's Response: Wow, this is fantastic to hear! I'm so glad that you saw that image because the scene in the field was not part of my original plan, but I loved writing it. Thank you very much for reading and reviewing, and most of all, for liking this story. :) Report Review
This is simply phenomenal. Honestly, I usually shy away from any story where James isn't the perfect guy for Lily, and Siriuly isn't my normal cup of tea, but this has changed my mind about both completely. This story fits so well with canon, and even more so, it explains tiny things about Sirius' character that standard canon doesn't.
Moreover, it's so bittersweet that I can't decide whether to smile or cry. I love that they had their summer in the sun, and that they got to be in love, and I also love that in the end he moved aside for his best friend, showing that kind of love too, for the both of them. But, I can't help but be sad at how it ended, even though there was no other possible outcome. Beautifully painfully wonderful.
And the poetry and imagery of it all - the ants that "live and die and make no mark", the shadowing of the court of King Arthur, the dialogue of Lily when she explains why he is different from the first two. Honestly, it's just so beautiful; it's painful to read when one considers their own work! And this is especially surprising, as I have an extremely low tolerance for overly flowery or poetic writing, so to hit that perfect fine line between lovely and saccharine is an impressive skill.
Loved it. Just loved it.Author's Response: It feels so wrong to be happy about changing a reader's mind, especially regarding a ship, but it's wonderful that this story made you appreciate Sirily more. It's a very difficult ship to make canon because it requires careful timing and characterization. I personally find the James in this story unlikable, which wasn't what I intended, but I'm pleased to hear that this characterization actually enhanced the perfection of Sirily. :P I didn't expect that reaction at all.
What's great about writing from a male first-person POV is that I don't have to worry about the story becoming too flowery. Romantic, yes, but it's described differently because it's coming from Sirius, so even if it's poetic at times (and I thank you for complimenting those lines and images ^_^), it's restrained, maybe not simple, but simplistically expressed. That must be where the pain shows through, Sirius's pain, that is. Maybe that's why I like writing the ship, because it's impossible in so many ways, and it's challenging to find the ways to make it not only possible, but logical.
Thank you so very much for this wonderful review! It's fantastic that you took the time to read, review, and love this story. ^_^ Report Review
I really liked this! It's really well written. The voice you gave to Sirius is believable and us readers can really feel what he is feeling. we can understand what he goes through and why he made the choices he did. I don't normally read Sirius/Lily but I think your one-shot might have just turned me towards that ship xD anyways, thanks for the great read!
ElisaAuthor's Response: Thank you very much! I'm really glad that Sirius's voice was believable because this isn't how I normally write him and I wasn't certain whether it would turn out sounding properly like him. It's even better to have turned you toward the ship. :P It's one with a lot of potential and that's really interesting to read and write. :D Report Review
beautifully written! I love the style you used, it gives it an almost poetic feel. kudos on a wonderful piece of writing.
~Hannah~Author's Response: Thank you! Wow, I'm so glad that you enjoyed the story and liked the style. It's very experimental, and it's great to hear that it worked! ^_^ Report Review
I literally just read Seasons, and thought, "Wonderful as usual. But... essay due tomorrow... so review later." Resolved, I went to close all my Safari windows. One was the forums. And right there, seven minutes ago, was a post from Violet Gryffindor announcing a new story.
Squee squee squee squee squee.
I think the reason I'm reviewing this instead of Seasons is because I honestly like Sirily much more than Sevlily. As sweet and innocent and pure as the latter is, I just like the former more. I also remember years and years ago, the first thing I read of yours was a short story collection or something about all of Lily's loves. Or maybe it was a series of one-shots? I don't remember exactly, and it's deleted now (I've looked), and I think one of those stories was the first Sirily I ever read. So. Emotional connections galore.
Anyway -- the fic itself. That's important, right? But honestly, I love these characterizations of Sirius, where he isn't monstrous and where he isn't a saint either. He acknowledges that he loves her, he wants her, and indeed he has her for a time, but eventually he gives up for the sake of his friendship. Maybe for Lily, maybe even for himself. Who knows? And no matter how much he talks about it, I don't think he knows. And you know that this is an archetypal Sirius, but he's exclusively yours, too. I think it's the direct addressing of the "you," to Lily, that changes the dynamic. It's so intimate this way, and we see his heart breaking and I wonder how anyone else can do that.
Assertive Lily is also a delight. That scene in the field, where she talks about people putting her on a pedestal, loving her from afar -- gosh, that's so true and such a common motif in these fics and I like that she knows that. I like that she appreciates something else in Sirius that he doesn't do that. He interacts with her on a human level, not necessarily a love interest level, and that she recognizes that and encourages it is so great to see in her. I just think... I don't know, there's always an element of idealization (of Lily, mostly, and sort of an idealization of that destined love, to an extent), I think, in these types of fics. And this doesn't exactly escape that, but it uses it. It's the twisting of what one can reasonably expect from a Sirius/Lily/James and how it still manages to touch the reader that I can't shake.
Also, James. I don't know the movie this is inspired by, but... Sirius knowingly portrays him as grating. He says in an earlier section that James was an idiot when it comes to you, Lily, and -- ugh. I am a sucker for James/Lily and for Sirius/Lily at the same time and I never know what I want from these fics; should I be happy that she invariably goes with James? Should I feel bad for (usually oblivious) James or for (usually saintly/guilty) Sirius? Destined love or fleeting, temporal, invariably stunning love? Usually I resign myself to the former because it's canon and I cling to canon like a safety blanket. But this... I actually disliked James. So much. I couldn't even reconcile him (completely) with how I imagine canon James to excuse him for how grating he was.
Just... eek, how do you always reduce me to single-syllable words and ellipses? Not sure what else to say. Very glad I have all day tomorrow to write this essay, that's for sure. And even happier that I ignored it (I've been ignoring it a lot this week) to read this. ♥Author's Response: Goodness, Gubby, how am I supposed to respond to such a review? :O It's not only really, really big in terms of length, but it's also big in terms of content, and no matter how often I re-read it, I still don't know what to say! Thank you so much for reading both stories and finding so much to say about this one. They were both crazy ideas, very random, and they ended up turning into sizable one-shots, far longer than I expected they'd be. I should have been writing essays, but instead wrote these, so you're not alone in your procrastination. :P
This one is a revision of "Seasons". That one turned out to be too long, deep, and angsty for my taste - a very weighty thing that didn't quite capture Lily in the way I'd wanted. This one, while keeping Lily more at a distance, perhaps because it does so, was a very different story to write - it flowed out instead of having to be yanked like bad teeth out of my head. It's a more natural story, certainly a prettier one, which is funny because Sirily is usually the passionate, forbidden love affair while Snivily is usually the pure, natural love. Yet these two one-shots totally flip those conventions on their head, making Snivily into something terrible and destructive, while Sirily becomes this sad, beautiful thing. WEIRD. I'd never thought of it that way before. What on earth was I thinking while writing these?! I'll blame the fact that the essays in question were for Canadian Literature, and if there's any truly weird literature out there, the chance is that it's Canadian. :P
That short story collection only exists in its first chapter now - it's "Something Lost". The idea behind it was a good one, and I think it's stuck with me every since, because I keep returning to explore Lily and her various potential romances. Poor girl, I do ship her every which way. ;)
And that does make it hard when it comes to James. I like him and yet don't like him because of his treatment of Snape, so most of the time, I find him really hard to write without making him either a lovable idiot or a selfish bully - and here, of course, he ended up being the latter. It works in this case, mostly because of the movie reference, but also because it gives Sirius someone to blame. He doesn't understand why Lily had to be James's, what sort of predestination was working against him. Even I couldn't find a reason why Lily would choose James in the end, especially over this version of Sirius (who I'd totally go for :P), so I just left it hanging, something for the reader to fill in. Maybe James was really a different person than Sirius paints him here from the bitter hole of his jail cell. I don't know why I wrote James this way, especially since in "Seasons" he was so much the opposite. ARG! These stories will never cease to confuse me.
Thank you again for your wonderful review, Gubby. Your reviews are spectacular and I love reading every word over and over again. ^_^ Report Review
This is incredible.
My favorite Sirius/Lily story ever.
Beautifully written!Author's Response: Wow! Thank you so much! I'm really glad that you think so highly of this story! It means a lot that it's your favourite Sirily story, as there are some fantastic ones around. ^_^ Report Review
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