Hi, I felt like rereading this chapter since I'm so cool and all(jk :P) and wanted to leave a review.
First off, I really enjoyed how Lily was described in the beginning. It seemed so natural. Pippa is a great narrator that gave an inside on a different side of Lily. The conversation between them was sweet and open. It felt like there was a bond growing even though Pippa wouldn't ever admit it.
I like that you mentioned the cycle of hurt(that is what I call, don't ask why :P), how Al and her brother hurt her and she hurt Scorpius.
My favorite line(s) would have to be: "One day, I hoped I would not be held down by him, I would be able to untangle myself from his scolding grip. His mark will have faded. The bruises would be no more. I will stare at him and feel nothing." Your words captures the emotions so well like those words boxed the affections for us to touch. :) Your ability with words astound me.
The characterization of Pippa throughout this story is perfect. She is just like the rest of us, holding on to the abilities that make us human. I really hope she gets over her hurt and learns to live with it. Her bitter and snarky side is the best. To me, if she was always nice it would seem to fake, you know?
The last part left me craving to learn about her past and this ex you keep mentioning. I wish to learn more.
And I missed Albus in this chapter. Hope to see him in the next one.
10/10 Report Review
Ahhh!! Please hurry and update!! :) Report Review
when do we find out who 'he' is? Report Review
ajksdfhakjsdfas please please pleaseee update this soon! this is amazing! holy fuck my emotions are all over the place and god this is brilliant <3 absolutely in love! xx Report Review
I can't believe it took me ages to notice that you updated! It's nice to have you back and I hope the college applications goes well for you.
Anyway, Pippa. I have missed her. As always, her pain blew me away. It felt so real that I could almost touch it. I really liked how you portrayed Lily. I loved the little moment that Lily and Pippa shared. She really needed. I am glad James and Fred finally managed to talk to Pippa. I really liked how Pippa finally saw her ex also had some serious flaws. I know it hurt her. But it needed to happen.
Can't wait to see more of Albus and Pippa's interactions. Their chemistry is one of a kind. I missed Scorpius in this chapter. He makes me smile and I hope we get to see more of him soon.
Thank you for the update. Don't worry, take as long as you need to update the next chapter. It's always worth the wait. Report Review
Ohh a tear in the perfect illusion she had of him; can't wait to read on! Love the descriptions, makes you feel what Pippa's feeling! Report Review
hi . this is my first review for this story. i really like the way this story is going and i have some theories happen as to what can happen in the future . so maybe cn u hv a chapter in Al's POV so we know a bit of his opnion on Pippa or maybe you could have an Al and Pippa moment Report Review
wow this story is so comelliing that is just takes my breathaway
plwase update, take your time but update :) Report Review
I love this story and I love Pippa. She's so very real. Although I won't lie I would love to see what would happen if Pippa and Albus got drunk together. I imagine they would either end up having sex or blowing up the castle. Report Review
I just read through all the chapters and I really-really like it. ^___^ I am glad that you are writing something like this.
Pippa is like me in a lot of ways, so I somewhat find support in seeing someone else who thinks the same things that I do.. eh, and I also like to clean when I am stressed out. Everything has to be in order!
Hm, I don't think I have much more to add.. other reviews already did a very good job with it. I hope you get a chance to update soon! Report Review
Waited such a freaking long time for this! Aaand, well, it was brilliant :)
Pippa's ex was a sick twisted creature as far as I can see. He and Pippa both seem dark and twisty inside, but Pippa is not a bad person. She actually sort of has realized her mistakes and now, I totally love her!
I missed Albus in this episode. I missed AlbusPippa moments.
The sexual tension between the two could be cut with a knife. But I adore them together :)
Cassie! We want more Cassie! :))
Pippa should forgive James and Fred. They really like her and care about her, as apparent from this chapter.
And, I like Lilly too, :)
Overall, awesome :D
Cheers:D Report Review
This is absolutely amazing story! I love her Slytherninness. You are also amazing and talented writer! Please Update SOON! Report Review
I'm actually surprised and kind of relieved that I'm only three chapters behind in reviewing this story, because I really thought the situation was a lot ore dire than it currently is so that's always nice to know i'm not as far behind as I thought I was.
So, the Quidditch match was really interesting. Poor Pippa having a complete change of mind about what she was doing half way through everything. Although, this has to be one of my favourite quotes This game is really dangerous. like. it's nice for someone to acknowledge that it's a ridiculously dangerous game ahaa.
AND PROPER ALBUS/PIPPA ACTION. I really feel for Pippa though, because she reminds me of some of the darkest moments of my life and I kind of hope that in this story she begins to heal and... like Albus said, learn to fight her demons. Because aare all fightable :)
Plus, my insomnia's totally kicked up a knotch lately so I'm really feeling her wondering around semi conscious not really alive but just existing. Have you ever had insomnia problems? It just seemed pretty accurate.
Anyway, it's really nice to be caught up again! Happy the 11th of December :)
-AC Report Review
So. Many. Lies... *brain goes bang*
I just don't know what to make of Al and Pippa, it's like I said before - one minute it's like they get each other and there's a moment, and the next they hate each other and I wonder if I'll get to see their own, twisted version of a happy ever after... I have hope. :P
As for Pippa and Damien, I have no words. I keep expecting them to be okay again, because they're family, and then they argue and I wonder if it's too damaged, irreparable. I hope not. It would be sad for her to lose her family.
Harsh. Id hate to be James or Fred right now. And Cassie? I really hope Pippa doesn't lose her friend and her brother.
This was so amazing, I've missed reading this story. I can't believe I'm behind again, but at least it's only two chapters and not almost all like last time. I'll be reading the next one soon.
Sam. Report Review
I love this story!! It's very different and I really enjoy how you explore everyone's issues and inner demons. I like all your poetic analogies and descriptions. I also really like your characters, especially Pippa.
I like seeing how Pippa slowly changes and I find her incredibly endearing. She puts on a cold, detached attitude to protect herself but she's really strong even ignoring that. But interestingly she's strong because she's weak. (That makes no sense..) I mean she feels emotions very strongly and though she likes to act like she's one step ahead of everyone, she's frequently surprised and doesn't see things clearly right away. But because she feels so much, she has to work really hard to move on and stay strong and not crumble into a crying mess like she did in the astronomy tower. I like how she's independent and sticks up for herself. She may make bad decisions sometimes and hurt people, but she doesn't take anything lying down. And I believe that she will eventually become strong again and learn to let people in (a little more) and hurt her loved ones a little less.
I love Cassie and Scorpius and all her friends. I feel like Albus is very similar to Pippa but he sees things sooner than she does. I think he likes her, despite hating their similar bad attitudes and harsh fronts. Damien admittedly isn't high on my list. I'm sure he does care about Pippa but he's so annoyingly selfish and thinks of himself as superior in all rights. That just annoys me and I don't think I'll ever be fond of him like I am of Scorpius.
I'd really like to HIS name...even though I guess it doesn't really make much of a difference. I'm just curious. I find Pippa endearing for loving him so much and I definitely understand how she sort of idolized him and why she loved him. Though I don't find him particularly special at all in spite of that. Obviously he's a unique and dynamic character with flaws and attributes and all that, but he feels vague, if that makes sense. He's more of an idea than a concrete person, though he's obviously a concrete person. I think it's because Pippa rarely sees him in person, he exits ts I. The story more as a memory.
I'm also dying to know what the Pippa/Emilie/Cassie fallout was about. And who's sending Pippa creepy notes. I don't know why, but the only person I feel suspicious of is HIM. even though that's ridiculous. But I'm guessing it's probably a new character or a random once-mentioned character since I can't really imagine anyone she knows being to blame. I don't think it's Nathan (but what did ever happen with him?? I'd nearly forgotten.) I'm also kind of surprised Pippa hasn't reacted more dramatically to the notes. It seems like she hasn't told anyone (or has she?) and while I didn't expect her to be worried or frightened, I kind of expected her to be angry about it all. I guess she probably has too much going on in her life though to spend time complaining about that. And if Albus knows who it is and hasn't told anyone, I'm guessing it's not a dangerous threat. I know he 'hates' her and pretends he doesn't care and wouldn't want to seem like he cares, but I think he does like her. And he doesn't want her to get hurt (unless perhaps it's because of him.) And if it was really serious he would probably tell her in a way that would freak her out and tease her about it like a jerk to cover up the fact that he actually cares. At least that my guess.
Anyway, this is awesome so please update soon!! (I've just read it all in one go and spent quite a few hours so I fear I will soon be feeling withdrawal. Keep my suffering short, yeah?) Report Review
This first chapter is every little thing it should be. It's fantastic, flawless and perfect. I'm in love with Pippa and I adore her quirks and weirdness - it kind of reminds me of myself because I often tipped into awkward and embarrassing situations like Pippa does. I fell head over heals into your story, being dragged into another world, filling me with envy. You're a fantastic writer and don't let anyone tell you otherwise.
If I hadn't read all the other chapters already, this would be the place where I'd tell you that I'm truly excited to see what happens next and that this one chapter got me totally hooked already.
Well done on that, not everyone achieves that this fast.
So, I think I'm done rambling (aka. fangirling) now and will wait eagerly for the new chapter to arrive.
Lots of love,
Sally Report Review
How did I miss another update? I seriously need to pay more attention. Well, at least the timing is good. Without further ado, here is your Holiday Review Swap Extravaganza Thingee review:
Wow. I probably haven't made much of a secret about how much I like this story. I write long reviews and I pull quotes out of it and I gush about it and I make up half-baked theories about what's going to happen and I live in eager anticipation of Pippa and Albus finally having that moment where they drop the masks and connect. But this chapter, especially the ending, was more powerful than anything I've read in a long time. You bored so deep into Pippa's heart in this. You found new levels of pain and disaffection and even, I think, a little bit of hope. I know it hasn't been beta read and it was definitely rough around the edges, but once I got past that, it was really amazing.
There's something about your Lily that's fundamentally different from any other version of her I've ever read. Yes, she's pure and sheltered and nothing much seems to touch her. That part you find in most stories. But the flaws you've gifted her with are what really make her unique. She's naive, yet insightful in a way. She's sloppy; she pops bubblegum and gets her sticky fingers stuck in her unbrushed hair. She doesn't want to be treated any particular way because of her parents and she actually likes the fact that Pippa is obnoxious to her.
Something has definitely changed in Pippa since Damien, James and Fred's betrayal. She seemed drawn to Lily for all of the reasons that she would normally be annoyed by her. The same qualities that would usually leave her feeling disaffected and angry suddenly seem to pull the two of them together. She feels something toward Lily. Pity? Compassion? A desire to not see somebody destroyed by heartbreak who lives in this state of grace that she desperately wishes she could have? Whatever it is, she actually seems to take Lily's best interests to heart, and it isn't just because of her bargain with Albus.
Pippa finds hope, and it was one of the most beautiful things I've seen you write in this story. Of course, it's written in Pippa's usual self-flagellating inner voice, but I've really grown to like that voice, so I found it really moving. She is finally coming to grips with the fact that the person she was in love with was sort of an illusion. Something that she made up to suit her own needs, not the real person who was flawed and ultimately driven away by her behavior. Now she knows that she needs to find somebody who will embrace her for all of her snark and bitterness and insanity. Somebody who will love her for who she is. It's a really lovely sentiment.
“I’ve never known any cats that are into cannibalism.” Lily giggled and I frowned at her. “And anyway, you meet them cause of destiny.” - Oh, Lily. You are truly a magnificent creation!
The scene when she puts her hand on Lily's shoulder and actually attempts to comfort another person who isn't Scorpius was heart-warming. I'm not sure who this new person is and what they've done with old, self-centered, uncaring Pippa but, you know, she can stick around for a while. I guess she'll have to learn to hug another time, though.
The ending was the icing on the cake for this amazing chapter. Pippa came so far, so fast in this one. She actually manages to imagine a future where she casts off the chains of her broken heart, and then James and Fred come along with one last bucket of cold water to pour on the dying embers. And on Pippa, for that matter. I honestly never would have guessed that her relationship with the ex was so abusive. In her mind, it was always cast in such glowing, soft focus. Everything was wonderful between the two of them until her mental instability drove him away. This revelation really changes everything. Perhaps Pippa isn't inherently broken? Perhaps the damage had an external source.
I'm still sort of in awe of how great this chapter was. Like I said, there's a lot of spelling / grammar / typo stuff that needs to be cleaned up, but the brilliance shone through it all. I love this story more with every chapter. Now let's see what we can do about Pippa and Albus, eh? ;)
Great job! Happy Holidays! Report Review
So does Pippa clean the common room? I just didn't get that bit but it is an amazing chapter!!!Author's Response: Yes :) She cleans anything, her stuff, Cassie's stuff, cleaning helps focus her mind, so when everyones asleep, she cleans the common room :) And thank you so much for the review and I hope you have an amazing day! Xx Report Review
OMG THIS IS REALLY GOOD! YOU'RE A REALLY TALENTED WRITER!! I really want a cute scene between Albus and Pippa!!! GOOD JOB!!! :)Author's Response: Hey :) Thank you! I'm glad you like it! I hope you enjoy the chapter! Aha! You might not get a cute scene, but you'll get scenes of them together :P thanks a lot for the review and I hope you have a great day! Xxx Report Review
I like Pippa a lot, though she kind of reminds me of a 10-year-old. I'm guessing she's a bit older than that, though I am wondering what year she's in. Her thoughts are what make her seem so young and also endearing. It's sort of funny how she seems to want to be a sort of ice queen sometimes, though her thoughts reveal that she really isn't mean-spirited. Albus intrigues me and I'm not quite sure what to make of Damien just yet, though he seems pretty nice.
Great first chapter, by the way! I like how you jumped right into action, I hate being bogged down with tons of background information all at once in the beginning. A lot of stories do that. But I like getting a sense of the character's personality and thoughts and such first. And the action pulls me in :) Report Review
I really like how you've begun this! This is absolutely lovely! I'd read this chapter ages ago and favourited the story but I haven't had the time to properly review or read much more. However, this will have to change soon!
Pippa seems like such a great character and she's so distinctive already even though there is only this first chapter. I'm really interested to see where you take her because I have this feeling like there are many layers to this story. Whatever the case is, Pippa has a strong voice that will do an excellent job at carrying the story forward.
Albus also piqued my interest with his sarcasm and his dead looks. It seems like there is something under the surface there because most people aren't described as having 'dead' looks without it actually meaning something.
Your description so far is absolutely wonderful without it being overly flowery. I think this matches Pippa character well too. She's just... i don't know a little out there at this point. Trying to be tough and scary but the things she says or her actions (like mindlessly going into the cupboard for instance) makes it hard to take her seriously. Though, i like these different ideas we're getting from her because it makes it seem like she has depth and layered.
Anyway, really lovely job with this chapter! Report Review
is this progress? i think it's progress. LOVE your story ofc, that's why im reading it, and i can't wait for pippa to kill her demons. her and albus have a lot to work through, but you're doing a terrific job :)Author's Response: Hello! Yes! I would totally agree with you, this is progress! It's the start of something. And thanks! I'm so glad you're enjoying it! It means a lot to me! Me neither but it's going to take a lot of work on her part! And yes, they really do! Separately and together! Thanks for the review, I hope you have a wonderful day! Xx Report Review
Hi! I really like this story. Pippa is really mysterious, I keep reading to find out more on her. I'm not usually one for stories like this with dark undertones. But I adore this one! I used to think that this was a love story between her and Al. Sometimes I still think it is, but it's really something deeper. It's a story about Pippa herself and how deep of a character she is. You did a really good job! Keep updating :)Author's Response: Hello! Thank you:) And yes, you are constantly learning about her, but I think that's the same with any person, I learn new things about people i could write a book on all the time. I know what you mean, I personally don't read angst all that much, yet I'm writing quite an angsty story! It's weird but I'm glad you like it anyway! It's still a love story, mixed in with a lot of things like self redemption, I kind of see it as at the start, it's all broken and it's the path to becoming hopefully whole again, and everything that happens while on that path. Romance is kinda slowly burning at the moment but it gets hotter :) haha, that sounded cheesy! Thanks so much, hopefully an update should be coming before the new year :) I have lots of ideas for it! Thanks a lot for the review, it's made my day and I hope that you have a great day! Xxx Report Review
Wow, I've really fallen behind on this story and I have no idea why! It feels good to be back to it though; I really missed Pippa and Scorpius!
First off, the flashback was brilliant. Poor Pippa, she was really destroyed... The way you presented her, broken and lost was really perfect and it explains so much how she became what she is now. The continuation was clear between the hearbroken Pippa and the, erm, hidden behind a wall Pippa (sorry, we have a word for that in French and I can't express it as clearly in English right now for some reason...).
Second, Rose? I really like that development! Has she got feelings afterall? I don't think they will really go further in this and become BFFs but I think they might have (or at least Pippa) gained a bit more respect toward one another. My only problem with that scene is that it seems clear that Rose saw Albus push Pippa and yet, she didn't say anything about it. If she'd have wanted to protect her cousin, she wouldn't have told Pippa that she knew so, that is a bit weird to me.
Finally, the confrontation between Albus and Pippa was once again brilliant. I love how these two seem to live for those moments and become energized by the fury they feel for the other. I am becoming more and more obsessed with what happened to Albus though, I must admit.
Great chapter, I really liked it and I'm glad I can get back to this story! Report Review
Oh my god that was unexpected. Great work, although you might want to check your grammar here and there ('I faked coughed', things like that). And I hope you get better soon!
XxxAuthor's Response: Hey :) Thanks! I'm glad you thought so. Thank you so much for pointing that out, I knew it didn't sound right yesterday but in my sleepy state, I couldn't figure it out :) I've changed it now so I appreciate it :) And thanks so much! Thanks for the review, it means a lot and I hope you have a great day! xx Report Review
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