10 Reviews Found

Review #1, by adluvshp How to save the world

14th March 2014:
Blackout battle 14/20

Aw, this was such an adorable little piece. I absolutely loved your characterisation of Lavendar as a ten-year-old. Her thoughts were amusing and cute, and actually quite believable for a girl her age. I also enjoyed your narrative as you kept the consistency of the thoughts sounding like they came from a little girl and not a grown up. The last bit was my favourite as it just expressed her innocence more. The idea of Lavendar wanting to be Minister and change the world was too cute, and it also showed a glimpse of her Gryffindor traits - 'noble' thoughts and all xD

I noticed a few grammar/spelling errors in a few places, for example "dinner" was spelt "diner" so this could do with a re-read and quick fix. Apart from that, this really made for a fun little read and brought a smile to my face.

Good job =)
--AD
(AditiDraco95)

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Review #2, by Pixileanin How to save the world

2nd February 2014:
Aww! This was really cute! I loved how you brought out the little ten-year-old voice with all the things that she wants to do when she grows up. It has that child-like enthusiasm, that single-minded altruistic hope that children at this age carry.

My favorite part has to be at the end, where she's called for dinner, and she thinks about her options. Yes, the Minister will have more power, but why sacrifice fashion sense? Haha! Very nice, and very age-appropriate for the character.

I could hear her little-girl voice saying this out loud. It wouldn't surprise me if she was doing it in front of a mirror with a scrunched up, serious face. Kids at this age do mean what they say.

This was very enjoyable. I had a great time reading it!

Author's Response: Aw thanks so much for this review! It's one of those stories that I keep on my page because they remind me how far I've come when it comes to writting.
Also, it's always fun to imagine young Lavender less egocentric then how she is presented in the later original books (a phase most teenagers go through, mind you). I definitly imagine her in front of her mirror, maybe with a hairbrush in hand and standing on a box or something, to give herself more importance.

I'm glad you found this to be age-appropriate; I find that this is essential. It doesn't always give the best stories because children live in a world of their own that, as teenagers or young adults we find laughable, but I much prefer that to the opposite, which is having a ten years old thinking rationnaly like an adult.

I'm glad you had a good time reading it, it's the reason why I write afterall, to allow people to get away from their RL for a moment :)


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Review #3, by ginerva_molly_weasley How to save the world

13th April 2012:
I love this!

The last line especially is just heart rendering which is completely lovely because I can just see her determination within these statements and just how much she wants to change the world and punish the offenders who commit crimes which is one of the main qualities you obviously need to become a lawyer which was good.

I also like that you chose Lavender Brown as we don't really have any preconcieved opinion of her childhood and future aspirations.

Its hard to believe that the first part with the strength and determination came from Lavender! But even so well done with this I really liked it!

Author's Response: This is probably my least favorite story but I'm still touched that you liked it! It was written for a challenge and I've been itching to delete it since it was written but, just because I'm not a fan of it, doesn't mean it doesn't deserve to be there. It is a testimony of how my writting has evolved afterall!!

Lavender is a mysterious character. She seems like an airhead at times and yet a very strong a bold Gryffindor at other times. She is certaintly very ambitious (like every children are about their future) and courageous but it's true that we do not know much about her.

Thanks again for the review !


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Review #4, by ariellem How to save the world

1st January 2012:
Hello! I thought this was really cute! I don't know how you did it, but you were able to actually make me believe that she would want to be one! Very cute!

Author's Response: What is it with people revieweing this story all of the sudden???

This definitly isn't one of my favorite and I'm always debating wether to erase it. I like the essence of the piece but I really don't think I wrote it well... It was quite hard to make Lavender imagine herself a lawyer in the first place so I tried to make it so exagerate that it would fit what a pre-teen might imagine.
Glad you thought it was cute though, and thanks for the review!


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Review #5, by academica How to save the world

1st January 2012:
Hey! Here from review tag :)

I really like Lavender, and I don't think she's written about enough, so I thought I'd come check this out.

This was kind of cute. My first thought was that the majority of the piece, where Lavender is describing what she's going to do, was a little serious for her character as we know her. However, when I got to the end and found that she was just a little girl dreaming big, that made the whole thing sort of humorous. I especially like her comment about the clothes :)

You've got some grammar errors and spelling mistakes in there, but that's really the only thing I noticed. Otherwise, good work!

academica

Author's Response: Hey!

Wow, this was written for a challenge in about 10 minutes. I'm not all that fond of it but I keep it there because it's not all that bad either.
The challenge was to have Lavender dremaing of being a lawyer... Those two clashed instantly so I tried to make it an exageration and passionate rant like I think Lavender would have.
I'll go over it someday, checking for those mistakes and I thank you very much for this review.!


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Review #6, by melian How to save the world

10th August 2011:
Aw, that is so cute!! I love the idea of Lavender looking in the mirror telling herself that she's going to change the world one day. Or save it. Whatever, really. It's a lovely insight into the mind of a pre-teen who has more dreams than she knows what to do with. And the idea that she didn't want to be Prime Minister because she didn't like the clothes was oh-so-typical of that age group, and something that I certainly wouldn't have thought of. Great job!

melian (gryffindor)

Author's Response: Thanks very much for such a nice review and please, accept my apologies for such a late answer...
This story was written for a challenge and, although it isn't personal favorite, I still enjoy young Lavender a lot. It's a character we heard a lot about in the books but don't know much about really; we know about the way she presents herself but that seems far from being Gryffindor material so, I thought she probably had it all inside, in her dreams, hopes and values.
I'm especially glad you think that she is representative of her age group; I work with girls that age and, although they drive me crazy at times, I just love their carefree thinking so much; it's refreshing!
Thanks again for such a lovely review, you made my day :)


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Review #7, by Debra20 How to save the world

5th August 2011:
Wow, what a sweet story!!

What struck me most was her innocence. You know that age when you think you can do everything? When you think every thing's possible? When you feel you can top the world, and be the best? You captured that purity of thought and emotion SO perfect! I think I smiled all the way through it.

What surprised me is to hear her ambition. Isn't she a pure-blood? How is it that she dreams of becoming a lawyer?

My favourite part must be the end phrase. "One thing is for sure though; I will eventually save the world, punishing one offender after the other. For now, dinner's ready." Even if not in the form of a law defender, she did help save the world by joining the DA and fighting against Voldemort. That must have been the most touching part of your story. How you showed us that life takes us on such different paths, so opposed to those we thought we'd take when we were kids. It's a bitter-sweet truth especially in this story because we don't know for sure if she died or not in the Battle of Hogwarts.


House Cup 2011, End of an Era Review Extravaganza
Forum name: Debra20
House: Gryffindor

Author's Response: Thanks so much for this review and sorry for the delay in the response; I honestly had not noticed there was a new review on this story.

You really understood what I was trying to do here; show Lavender in that particular stage in life where you think you can do everything. You understand that the world isn't all that great and you believe that you have what it takes to right the wrongs.
As for her blood status, I wondered a lot about that and decided to have her half blood considering in the third book, (PoA) she didn't know what a Grim was and the only other people that didn't were either halfbloods or muggleborns.

Thanks again for this review!


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Review #8, by Pretense Of Perfection How to save the world

14th June 2011:
Cute chapter. I like the naiivety of her young age. I'm assuming based on this piece your Lavender is either a muggle born, or her parents haven't told her about magic.

Author's Response: Thanks a lot for this review. It's not my favorite story at all but I like it no matter! Lavender's blodd status did not really matter to me for this piece; I consider there is crime both in the muggle and the wizarding world and there are lawers in both world as well. So really, it can go any way you like!!!
Thanks again for this review, I really appreciate it!


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Review #9, by BrightStar How to save the world

7th March 2011:
Awww Lavlav! I know she's portrayed as such an airhead in the boooks, but I hope she gets what she wants. Short and very very sweet. So cute ! Loved it :)

Author's Response: Hehe, thank you very much. This is probably the story I am least proud of but I'm glad if you thought it was sweet!

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Review #10, by baletgir How to save the world

16th August 2010:
I love the title of this, that is what made me want to read it in the first place. It is a very creative idea for a title. Now, this was for a challenge I believe you said, and it seems somewhat difficult to me, you had to make a witch want to grow up to be something (seemingly) Muggle. In your eyes was Lavender a Muggle born? That would help this make a little more sense. It would help if you added something in along that line so the reader understands why she isn't interested in a magical career.

The middle part was a bit repetitive, Lavender seemed to be rambling in order to use up some words and make it a bit longer, though children do tend to do that. So it might have been completely in character of her, but again it could be a bit more clear!

Ignoring the few spelling errors and typos I did enjoy this. Good job!
:)BaletGir

Author's Response: Thanks for your honest review, it is very appreciated!
I did not consider this to be very good work but, since I was on short delay, I posted it like this anyway. I'm not proud of it but wouldn't deny it either!
To anser your question, I see Lavender as a half-blood, with lawyers in her family. Also, I see her as a bit, erm, full of herself let's say! She sees herself capable of great things and has big ambitions. And yes, the rambling part was voluntary considering her age.

Thanks for reviewing, really, it helps for future writtings!


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