Love the story and the very original plot. Your characters are brilliant, and there are some true laugh out loud moments. I do hope you update/finish this story. It's be a shame to have such promise go abandoned. Keep up the wonderful work! Report Review
This story is rather bizarre and I'm not sure I like it all that much, but do finish it please, it would be interesting to see how you end it. Report Review
Started reading this earlier this afternoon and I have to say that I'm quite addicted.
I liked the most how you brought in the other characters into the fairy tale world as well and how Mary seems to think that Lily and James must be impostors. I also love how you write Petunia and Snape, you have them both in character and it's interesting to be seeing them plot together against Lily. You have me wondering what Petunia has in store for her sister.
Very well written! I'm excited to read more :) Report Review
Mother of... What- I can't even. They can't get married! Jily forever! *pouts angrily* I believe the impending marriage means either one of two things. Either a) James and Lily will have to get back to their world before the wedidng or b) they will have to escape the castle before or in the middle of the wedding and live as outcasts for a little bit before they manage to somehow use Dumbledore (who I am convinced has to help them in some way) to get back. Or I'm completely wrong and you'll going to pull something incredibly awesome because Snape and Lily can't get married. Right? Right?!?!
I found it rather amusing that Remus and Mary were right in thinking that Lily and Jams were imposters and that Sirius didn't believe them. And then he suggested that Lily and James were having an affair which actually is something that I secretly wish was happening but that I know isn't going to appear in the story just yet *sigh*
Loved this chapter! You make me hate Snape and Petunia even more as the chapters go on. Great chapter and please update soon!
classicblackAuthor's Response: I can't help you how it happens or when it happens, but rest assured, this is a Jily story, not a Snily. *shudders* Your ideas are interesting and not completely off track either!
To be honest, if it wasn't for Dumbledore helping them along, I doubt they would have come to that conclusion so quickly. Not saying that they're dumb, they're just not the sharpest tools in the shed. As for Sirius, well, he believes only the best in his friends and James wouldn't lie to him. Would he?
I must be doing my job correctly then, as you're not supposed to like them all that much!
Thanks for all of your wonderful feedback. You're awesome! Report Review
Aah! You're back! This is so exciting; I've missed this story! It did take me a bit to get reacquainted with all the characters and get back into the plot, but I think I remember everything now and am ready for speady updates!
I really loved this chapter. Plenty of drama to spice things up a bit with Snape and Petunia's plan to destroy James and Lily, but also some sure signs that Lily and James are finally going to get a couple thing rolling (and possibly smack Snape and Petunia upside the head while they're at it).
I can't wait to see how you're going to get them out of mystical-magical land. Awesome chapter!
classicblackAuthor's Response: Indeed I am! It was quite a long time since I updated, so I completely understand as I, too, had to go back and refresh myself with a lot of the going-ons of this story. But goodness, if it doesn't feel good to be writing again.
I actually have a really fun time writing Petunia and Snape. They're so slippery and think so highly of themselves. Perhaps I should be a bit worried that it's so easy to slip into that mindset, lol!
Thank you so much for your review! Report Review
Hahaha oh this is such a promising start! Really loving it so far! A stable boy! Brilliant :P I always loved the stable boys and James Potter would make an excellent one teehee :)Author's Response: I'm glad to see that you're enjoying it! Thanks for the review. Report Review
Oooh, I do love a big stand off between snape and James!
Good Job so Far!Author's Response: Thank you so much for reading and reviewing! I'm glad you're enjoying it. :) Report Review
So good! I loved it i want to knowvwhats going on with the fairy tail world thing!Author's Response: I suppose you'll just have to wait and see, won't you?
Thanks for reading! Report Review
New chapter! Wahoo! And the plot is really thickening, isn't it?
Remus was, once again, hilarious. He gets so flustered so easily! :P Had you mentioned in the story before that Sirius had once been human, and was transformed into a dog? I can't remember for sure, but anyway, it's a great little detail. Now I'm wondering if he'll be changed back to his human self at some point before the end of the story.
The end completely surprised me. I thought Petunia was going to pull something completely out of left field, like that she was marrying Snape instead, but thinking now...that wouldn't exactly be bad for Lily, would it? :P I'm hoping this will motivate Lily and James to work together to create an escape plan (operative word: TOGETHER).
Great chapter again; can't wait for the next!Author's Response: Yes, I dare say that it is. And it's about time. It's only been seventeen chapters, lol.
He does, doesn't he? I never realized just how anxiety-ridden he is until I wrote this chapter, but I think that's what I like best about him. Remus always seems so cool under pressure (minus that scene in DH when he's thinking of leaving Tonks), so it's fun to flip that trait upside down and play up the opposite. As far as Sirius being a human goes, I have mentioned it, just not in so many words. It was a long time ago, but I did say that he'd been cursed. I think that was back in chapter four or five, so I don't really expect anyone to remember that. Whether he'll go back to being a human or not remains to be seen.
Originally, something like that was going to happen but then I realized that there's really no immediate motivation for Lily and James to make their escape from the castle. I mean, if Petunia was marrying Snape instead, one of their biggest problems has vanished and they've got a longer amount of time to figure out their escape. Now that the wedding's been bumped up, they have no choice but to speed up the process they've already begun. Thankfully, they have been getting along a lot better than they had in previous chapters, but I promise that one of the issues that caused trouble between them will resurface, just not quite in the same way.
Thank you so much for your review, Penny. You're the best. Report Review
Very interesting story, cant wait to see more!Author's Response: Thank you very much for reading and reviewing! Report Review
...I have no self control.
So, I was just quickly browsing the forums, ready to dive back into writing when - what's this? - a new chapter of Distinctly Disenchanted? I have to read it!
It's amazing, per usual. I love this plot twist. How does Lily get out of this? Tell me please? :)
Update soon, please.
~Elle (who is too lazy to sign in)Author's Response: Well, I for one am glad that you decided to indulge your impulse and read this!
Thank you so much! I always have so much fun writing this story and I'd forgotten that in my too-long absence. As for how Lily gets out of this, I think first we need to discover exactly what she's in for, so hopefully you'll stick around to find out :P
Thanks again for your review! Report Review
An update after sooo long! And it was wonderful. I can't wait to find out how Lily and James are going to make it back. Keep writing =)Author's Response: Indeed! I actually updated this story after almost a year away a few weeks ago, but this is the second of many more updates to come! I'm so happy that you're still reading after such a long wait, which I apologize for profusely.
All of the pieces are finally beginning to fall into place, but rest assured there is still a lot more to this journey!
Thank you for reading and reviewing! Report Review
Yay, I'm finally caught up on the story!
Another interesting POV switch this chapter. Snape's thoughts were kind of unpleasant, but it does reveal some of his motivations.
I hope that Lily and James figure a way out of their situation before all the other plots catch up with them. And you must update soon! I want to read more! :DAuthor's Response: Yay! I'm happy that you are!
I hope the POV switches aren't throwing off readers. I mean, I understand that this is a Lily and James story but I feel that it provides more depth and layers when I write about the other characters POVs. It's also a lot easier to explain things without letting James and Lily in on the secret!
Ah, I don't know if they will or not! I mean, yes, okay, I actually do, but you get what I mean!
Sadly, I was an idiot and instead of hitting 'edit' on my last review, I hit 'post', so I didn't get to thank you for your last review! At any rate, thank you so much for this one and all of the others that you've left me. They've been so wonderful to read; I love seeing other people's reactions to what I've wrote and I'm so glad that you're enjoying this!
Thank you so much for reading and reviewing, Penny! Report Review
Ack, evidence of the secret Snape/Petunia affair! And Snape is such a cad, really--he considers Petunia "back up" if something happens to Lily. Sheesh. I hope James gives him what's coming to him.
I'm so happy that Lily and James are forced to spend more time together, even though they're being preyed upon by what seems like everyone else in the castle.Author's Response: Yes! They are indeed having an affair, something that I was wanting to write as subtle but with each passing chapter, can't seem to! I do feel awful for Petunia because at the end of the day, Snape is using her as a means to an end as, essentially, all he wants to do is destroy James' life and blackmail Lily into being the obedient wife he wants. Granted, the Lily of Westerflower actually wants to marry him as she sees the advantage in the marriage as well, but you know. Whatever :P Report Review
This is getting SO good! I loved the conversation about blood status and how it relates to Voldemort. It's a different take on it, but still boils down to the same prejudice.
AND THEN. James is Lily's bodyguard? *faints* This is the best thing that could have happened!!! But I'm suspicious, just like James and Lily, and that wasn't helped by the last scene and whatever Remus was so worried about when he was talking to James.Author's Response: Thank you! One of my biggest concerns with this story is that I'm not pacing it right, that I'm throwing out all of these new questions without answering any of them. I mean, there's going to be a few huge moments of revelations in the coming chapters and I know that all of the questions will be answered, but I can't help feeling like I'm withholding information that might make more people read or, at the very least, the people who are reading far more engaged with the story.
I'm trying to include as many parallels as I can without making it the exact same thing. It's a bit difficult at times, but I'm glad to hear that it's paying off!
Yes! Yes he is! It's the best and also one of the worst, as you'll later find out. Nothing happens in this story without a consequence!
Thanks for reviewing, dear! Report Review
It was really interesting to get to see things from Petunia's POV. She's been a great character so far, because she's not two-dimensional--at certain times, she's really spoiled and unpleasant, but at others (like in this chapter), she tries to protect Lily.
I loved the parallels you drew between Dumbledore's role in James and Lily's "real" world, and his role in Westerflower (sorry, I think I called it Westerhollow in the last review :P). "The enemy is that strong"--that was a great line.
Very suspicious of what Petunia and Severus are planning...Author's Response: I'm a firm believer that despite all of the airs that she puts on, Petunia does still care for her sister. Granted, it's a feeling that brings about bitterness and resentment, but it's still there. She may not be the nicest person or the most honest or loyal but she does have a few good qualities. :P
Yes! That was one of the points I wanted to make sure I included because it's still a Marauders fic and I feel like some mention of war should've been made. Westerflower might not be in all out war with our still-unknown enemy, but the tension is definitely there and it continues to mount, something I think would have been very similar to how things were when James and Lily were at Hogwarts.
You should be suspicious. Very much so. If you weren't then I wouldn't be doing my job as a writer :P
Thanks for yet another lovely review! Report Review
Ooh, the plot thickens! You've done a really good job at concealing all of the behind-the-scenes machinations. At this point, I honestly don't know who's the bad guy (or girl) in all of this. Is Snape plotting against Westerhollow? Is it all a plot by Lily and Petunia's mysterious mother and father? Or is it someone else altogether? And on top of that, there's still the whole issue of how James and Lily got to Westerhollow, and how they're going to get back to the real world. It's all very intriguing and mysterious, especially now that we've been introduced to this woman with strange powers.
I loved this comeback: "And pettiness doesn't suit you, but we all have our faults, don't we?" There was a lot going on for Lily in this chapter. Her concern for James was really endearing, and I can't believe Snape showed up at her door that late!
So when Lily sat down with James, I had this terribly hopeful feeling in my chest that they were going to start going down a nice, fluffy path. And then they started fighting. Blegh. Those two really need to start considering MY feelings more.
Another great chapter! :)Author's Response: For a while I was worried that I was keeping too much a secret, which is why in the next few chapters I keep going back to Petunia and Snape and the like so we get all of the details, even if Lily and James don't. I do hope it's not an overload of information, though!
It's good that you mentioned the old with the strange powers. She's going to play a very important role; she wasn't included for no reason, after all. The question you should ask yourself is what's she doing roaming about the castle so soon after the attack?
Yes! I do love that line very much. Snape is quite the character, I must admit. It's terribly fun writing him because one minute, he's this slimy git and the next - well, he's still a slimy git, only with a lot more sleaze.
Well, you see, I was going to have them be all hunky-dory with each other, but then I said to myself 'well, that'd just be too easy'. And! And that particular conversation will come back to - well, not haunt them, per se, but it'll come up again and be a topic of discussion, that I can promise!
Thank you so much for your lovely review! Report Review
Aw, my heart melted a bit with that line about how James wouldn't die without having kissed her once.
I really liked the violence in this chapter--which isn't something I would have expected myself to say, because blood and guts kind of make me feel squicky. It made the mood of the chapter really realistic and dire. And ooh, I had this sudden idea that maybe this attack is somehow meant to parallel Voldemort in the real world. Which might mean that Snape is involved...
I'm a bit concerned about James now. :S I hope he isn't too badly hurt! (Or maybe I hope he is, so Lily can sit by his bedside. I love the scenes with the two of them together.)Author's Response: It's true, though! He wouldn't!
Thank you! I was worried that it'd be a little too graphic and violent, that it would turn readers off rather than set the mood I was hoping to achieve. It was difficult trying to find the right balance to make it seem believable, so I'm relieved that you thought it was! And yes, in a way, it is a parallel to Voldemort! Sad as I am to say this, he's not actually the villain in this. I'd already gotten the idea in my head way before I even considered Voldemort as the villain - silly me.
He'll be okay! James is my baby - as much as I like to cause him pain, I wouldn't extend his physical suffering any longer than I have to. Emotional suffering, on the other hand... :P
Thanks again for your review, Penny. You're awesome! Report Review
Cliffhanger! No! (Well, I shouldn't complain much, since I can just click to the next chapter--but still! :P) I suspect collusion between Snape and Petunia...
On another note, though, I loved the inclusion of Dumbledore! The role you assigned him was perfect, and his eccentricity was great.
Mary and Remus putting their heads together spells disaster, I think. But part of me also hopes they'll get together by the end of the story. :P
Sorry for the dashed-off review, but I want to see what happens next!Author's Response: You're one of the few that has!
I had fun writing Dumbledore. He's a bit like his canon counterpart, but I tried not to make him too much like him. Also, I'd be a liar if I said he wasn't inspired by Gaius on Merlin - because he is.
Oh, those two lovable dunderheads. The amount of trouble they get up to. And who knows? Maybe they will end up together! I haven't decided just yet but this universe's Remus deserves some happiness, too!
Nonsense, this review was lovely, just as all of your others have been! Report Review
The scene between James and Lily! :D Loved it. It initially seemed so romantic, and then it turned out that James had overindulged on his night out. :P And the part where Lily thought he was going to confess his love, but he was actually there to tell her about Sirius' suspensions/sculptures/suspicions--hilarious! It was such a well-written scene.
Gah, so cruel for not revealing the identity of Petunia's mystery man! I'm highly suspicious that it's Snape, of course, but I wouldn't be surprised if it was someone else.
Great chapter! I'm very eagerly continuing on to the next. :DAuthor's Response: That was an extremely fun scene to write! Drunk James is highly enjoyable, even if he slurs and falls into bushes. I'm not usually someone who writes James as the sort to confess his love to Lily on a daily basis because let's be real, he would never do something like that, but I had to include that in her thought process. After all, she tends to think him rather ridiculous :P
You might be onto something with that suspicion! I'll neither confirm nor deny it, but my reaction to your reaction is probably proof enough!
Thank you so much for your kind words. I get the most ridiculous smile on my face when I check for new reviews and see yours among them. Report Review
The opening of this chapter was really funny! I love how prone to dramatics Remus is; it sets up a great dynamic between him and James, with James having to constantly search for solutions to petty problems. And then Remus faints! And James has to go out on stage instead. :P
I'm intrigued by the moment where Snape was looking at Lily, and then turned so tame. I don't know if it's just him being a bit of a con artist, or if something more was going on...but it seemed significant, somehow.
Oh, I noticed a few really small typos as I was reading. (I always like to have this stuff pointed out to me, because it makes it easier than having to read through the entire thing myself.)
- The fact you're the court jester stills astounds me
- There was another wild outburst of applauses
- Your Highness, please forgive me and taken into consideration
- Don't apology, James.
I can't get over the hilariousness of Sirius the Talking Dog. Thinking about him sitting with James and Remus in a pub is just too funny! The ending of this didn't seem weird to me--it felt like a natural break in the scene. Good work again, loving the way the story is progressing!Author's Response: I have so much writing Remus, it's not even funny. He's equal parts dim and hopeless, but also kind and clever, the former being characteristics that aren't very commonly seen in Remus in Marauders fic. Normally I don't write him like that, but this is a different universe and carbon copies aren't fun. Besides, like you said, it makes for some good comedic moments :P
It's a bit of both, actually. Snape is a very big con artist, especially where Lily is concerned, but that was really the first time that she ever openly objected to him, which is something that her fairytale counterpart wouldn't have done, so needless to say, there's another person suspicious of her, but for a very different reason.
Thank you for pointing those out! No one else has before and it always makes me feel a little silly for having missed those, so seriously, thank you!
I remember when I was planning this story and I had the idea to make him a dog instead of a human. I didn't think he would turn out all that great and be so widely received, but I'm so happy that he is! And yay! I was worried that it was a little abrupt and that the story itself is moving at an odd pace. I tend to have pacing problems more than anything else.
Thank you so much for this review as well as all of your others, Penny. You're amazing, simply put! Report Review
Wow, did Snape ever put on a different face in this chapter! O_o Good thing that it seems like Lily hasn't fallen for it.
On the other hand, I loved the scene with her watching James work. (Is it weird if I admit that, in the initial playing of that scene, where I didn't know she was watching, I was kind of thinking along those same lines? :P) He really has gotten the short end of the stick, though, hasn't he?
Oh, one thing I noticed--you wrote "calloused" at one point, and I think you may have just meant "callous". Although, on the other hand, since it was Petunia who said it, it might be funny to just leave it as a silly mistake on her part. :P She's always entertaining...and I have this strange feeling that she might have her own designs on Snape. I can't imagine that she's entirely okay with the fact that her sister is geting married before she is!
Also, I'm curious about who their mother and father are--whether it's the same people who are their mother father in the normal world, or if you've inserted new characters.
Great work, and I will be back to read more soon!Author's Response: Aha, yes! Snape is nothing if not good at manipulating people Or at least he thinks he's good at it.
No, it's not weird at all! I know it was a little cliched and all, but I couldn't help myself. :P I can say that James' situation does improve as the story progresses. As much as I like making my characters suffer, I like prolonging it...much.
Ah! Thank you for pointing that out! I wouldn't have seen it if you hadn't. It's so strange how no matter how many times you go through your own work to edit, there are still things you don't catch! So really, thank you as that's quite a glaring mistake. :D
Petunia is definitely not one to be underestimated. Too many people cast her aside in favor of Lily because Princess Lily is the more likable one. And Petunia's had enough of it.
I can tell you know that as it stands, the great king and queen have not yet made their appearance. But they will! Eventually!
Again, thank you so so so much for your reviews. They're really making my day. :) Report Review
Jumping in to read a couple more chapters here! :) (Awesome chapter image, by the way!)
I love Mary's personality, and getting to see her perspective in parts of the story. I have your comment about how she's not very subtle in the back of my mind, and that, combined with how inquisitive she is, makes me feel like she's going to play an important role in the rest of the story...I could be wrong, but either way, she's very well-written!
Alastor makes me laugh so much, too, and Remus' melodrama was also amusing. In fact, I think I should just say generally that all of the minor characters in this story are really brilliant and entertaining.
Snape was hilariously spoiled and unpleasant, as I think befits someone whose title is "Crowned Prince of Easterhollow and Her Surrounding Territories". :P
I didn't really feel like this chapter was filler--or at least, not in a bad way. Every story needs parts where you introduce certain characters, or explain things, or set something up, and this felt perfectly natural in that sense. :)Author's Response: Didn't Susan do a fantastic job? I almost cried when I saw it, it was so beautiful.
I have a lot of fun writing Mary. In fact, I have a lot of fun writing all of the characters in this story, especially the minor characters as they're the ones that are really forwarding the plot. But you're not wrong in that she'll play an important role in more ways than one. The shenanigans that she and a certain someone else get into cause a lot of drama!
Thank you! I worry so much about characterization and in a story where there are so many minor characters, I fear that they'll all bleed into one another, so the fact you said that just makes me really happy for a multitude of reasons.
Snape - oh Snape, how I adore writing him as the spoiled brat prince that he is. But he's also very slippery, as you'll find out in later chapters!
Thanks so much for your review. Report Review
So, I think this is where I left off before (read: ages ago). I'm really excited to be getting back to this story, especially now that there's so many chapters to read!
I have to admit that I kind of laughed at James' suffering when he was being put to work (I'm just that kind of person, unfortunately). And that whole scene with Mary being "discreet" by staying in the shadows cracked me up!
I can't wait for when Snape makes his appearance! Mostly because I want to see James get all rebellious-stable-boy on him. ;)Author's Response: I might have squeed a little when I saw that your penname. I know you said you were intending on reading this again, but I wasn't expecting a review!
I can promise you that you're not alone in your laughter. I, for one, was cackling as I wrote out his torture. It's so fun so make characters suffer, isn't it?
That scene was actually really difficult for me to write. I kept going back and editing it because it didn't sound right to me, so I'm relieved that you liked it. Unfortunately for Mary, as you'll find out, she's not very good at subtlety. No one is in this story, really, lol.
Ah, Snape. Like you and so many others, I despise him in canon, so I take as many opportunities as I can to make him an overdramatic, self-entitled idiot in this. That's one of the great things about this story - I get to take all of these canon characters and break them down, adding little bits of my own, and out of everyone, I think I have the most fun with Snape because he's just so ridiculous and gah, I love depicting him as a caricature of his canon self.
Thank you so much for reading and reviewing, Penny! You've made my day. :) Report Review
Wow what a coincidence, today I was just thinking that I haven't read or heard about this story in ages and then you come out and update it! My jaw actually dropped when I saw that! I'm really glad you did, though! Great chapter and I hope you can update sooner now :)
xxxAuthor's Response: Well, I'm really glad you read it. I know I went an extraordinarily long time without updating - almost year, as it were - but I'm hoping that everything's settled down in my personal life that it won't be so long between updates.
Again, thanks so much for reading and reviewing. It makes me so happy to know that there are still people out there who enjoy this story. Report Review
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