I hope my death is less painful than thisAuthor's Response: Oy, me too. Thank you for reading! Report Review
Oh that was so so sad. It was just incredibly tense, as of course I knew what was coming and was just waiting and waiting for the horror to arrive. I really liked the disordered time sequence, it worked well. It was just wonderfully written. Thanks! Report Review
this was amazing
you captured him so well
you're an incredible writer! Report Review
Melanie! I really enjoyed this. I think you've done a great job really laying everything out and working with all we know of the events that happened with the Potter family before that life-alternating night on Oct. 31, 1981. I actually teared up in a few spots, just pulled at my heartstrings a bit. And you really did good in your decision to write from James's perspective; you wrote him so perfectly, and that isn't exactly an easy feat for some so kudos for you. Over all, loved this story. (: 10/10 Report Review
D': This so very perfectly captures James and Lily and Sirius and Peter and _everyone_; I can't even tell you. It's just amazing. I absolutely love how you describe James and Lily's relationship, and how Harry adores Sirius. It's also wonderful the way you ordered the parts; 4, 2, 3, 1, 5. I really can't think of anything wrong with it.
And the idea of them being just children, and the shame that he would've felt, are spot on. I had always thought James would be ashamed of being unable to protect his family, but I hadn't read any stories that mentioned it.
It is beautifully tragic. And genius. I'll now go add it to my favorites ^-^Author's Response: Thank you!
I think sometimes a lot of James' finer attributes get lost in all love-hate romance fics he's thrown into. Not that I have a problem with those, but not many authors will really explore his relationships with his friends and the fact that he was forced to grow up very young and how this entire situation must have felt.
Thank you again. I am so happy to know you liked this so much. :-) Report Review
This is absolutely incredible; James is my favorite character and I think you wrote him beautifully.
10/10Author's Response: Thank you so much! Report Review
WOW. Enough said, but apparently reviews now have to be longer, so I will also say awesome, inspiring, meticouy thought out--just amazing!Author's Response: Thank you! I am so glad you liked it. Report Review
Simply one of the most amazing things I have ever read in my life. No other words. Well done. Loved it.Author's Response: Wow - thank you! Report Review
amazing, i love iy, very well written Report Review
Thought I'd point out the fact that you are an amazing writer! That was so fantastic and the ending was so sad :( You've left me speechless, it was just amazing. Thanks for a perfect story :) Report Review
Ok, I've finally arrived to the story I wanted to review. I've dedicated like three days to you... not doing anything apart from reading your stories, chapter after chapter. I was from 10 to 2 am reading all the stories about James and Lily, and I think this is the one I've liked the most.
I know it is the typical thing to say, but... It's just so sad. It's so sad that they actually didn't put up a fight, even though they were perfectly capable of it, because they had done it before. It's so sad that Voldemort chose Harry over Neville, even though Alice and Frank ended up worse than the Potters. It's so sad that Lily, James and Harry didn't have a normal life together because they were just hiding in their house... in their prison. It's so sad they actually shared still some passion. And it's so sad James' last thoughts were for her and him. Lily and Harry.
No imperfections, no problems, not even spelling mistakes. Absolutely, breathtakingly, PERFECT. Report Review
This was absolutely amazing! Brilliant. I love your portrayal of James. I love his voice. I love Lily.
Actually, I just kind of love your story. Excellent!Author's Response: Thanks! Glad you thought James' character and voice were done well. I appreciate the review! Report Review
Such a powerful story. It's a really strong and emotional depiction for an unknown part of the series. I really like your take on the events. Thanks for sharing.Author's Response: Thanks very much for your review! Glad you enjoyed it! Report Review
this is HORRIBLE! poor james. your write AMAZING! but, wow. poor him. everything he went to got shoved on him at such a young age...this is making me cryAuthor's Response: Aw. :-) Sorry to make you cry, but I hoped you liked it. Thanks for reading and reviewing! Report Review
loved it. love how you played James - very excellent. thank you for this story!!Author's Response: Thanks for reviewing! Report Review
Well done. I really enjoy your work.Author's Response: Thank you very much! Report Review
Wow, this story has a powerful grip that just takes your breath away, absolutely incredible. I'm completely speechless!
I had failed them.
I had forsaken them.
In the end, I couldn't protect them.
Brilliant, those lines made the story. It just proved how human James was despite everything that hailed him 'God-like' in a sense. J.K would have been impressed!
And you definitely did James justice XD completely loved it, well done!
XOXO WildFlower!Author's Response: Thanks for the fantastic review! I'm glad I was able to make James seem human - he is a fun character to write, and much more complex than many give him credit for, I think. Report Review
this is...just wow. this is exactly how it should have happened. in my mind, this is JUST how it played out. i love your writing, i love this piece, you are extremely talented and this really moved me. so thankyou. 10/10. awesome. xxx Report Review
this is.just wow. this is exactly how it should have happened. in my mind, this is JUST how it played out. i love your writing, i love this piece, you are extremely talented and this really moved me. so thankyou. 10/10. awesome. xxxAuthor's Response: Thank you very much for your review! Report Review
I don't really know what to say.
Your James, well, he was perfect. Everything about this was fantastic; the narrative, the compostion, the economy with which you treated each word, each sentence.
This was the best one-shot I've read in ages. You really captured a beautiful character; James Potter is one of my favourites.
I think you did him justice.Author's Response: Wow, thank you so much! I am so very flattered, and glad you enjoyed it. Report Review
Your writing is exceptional, as is your insight into the characters. You've also done a great job blending these deeper, more complex portraits of Lily, James, and even Sirius into the "canon" of JKR's books.
I've always wondered just what was going through James' head in those last critical seconds. I always thought it was something very much like you bring to life in this story. After all, who hasn't done something mindlessly, blindingly *dumb* at some point in life? Ever locked yourself out of your car, house, or motel room? Ever get all the way through the checkout line, just to realize your wallet is lying on the front seat of your car?
Those things can be humiliating and infuriating... but pale to insignificance compared to James' plight.
You've written a GREAT story - if your work had only been mediocre, I wouldn't have been cringing so terribly as your last few well-crafted sentences brought us to... the end.Author's Response: Thank you for this fantastic review!
Lily, James, and Sirius are characters who are not often written with very much weight. I have no problem with fluff, but I think a lot of people ignore the fact that even James and Sirius, the goofy pranksters, were thrown into horrifying situations at much too young an age. I wanted to explore a side of James that we almost never see -- and I wanted to show that part of him that might help explain why Lily grew to love him.
I think you hit the nail on the head about the mindlessly dumb things like locking your keys in your car. I think it was pretty much like that, only with far more severe consequences for James and Lily.
Thanks again for your thoughtful review! Report Review
I loved it!!
My favorite of yours,I've read them all!Author's Response: Thank you so much!! ^_^ Report Review
Awww so sweet!! Great story! I am practically crying!! Very nice writing!Author's Response: Thank you! Report Review
I love this. This shows how complex James really is. You show his childish side and his mature side and his thoughtful side. The 'only a child' bit broke my heart. It's just so sad knowing there story and knowing they spent so much time worrying and fighting against Voldemort they never got to live. I feel there anguish as James and Frank eyes meet. I know I will never know how they feel at that moment but your description put it down in way I will never be able to do. In short, I loved it and you write beautifully. You should become an actual writer.Author's Response: Thank you so much for your review! I'm glad you thought I showed James' complexities -- too often, I think authors miss out on the deeper aspects of his character.
I am flattered by all of your compliments. I would love to be a professional writer someday. Maybe (hopefully) it will actually happen! ^_^
Thank you again! Report Review
I love you so much! Powerful, POWERFUL use of words! It's... beauty, it's art that you create here with multi-coloured, refined strokes of hauntingly and dementingly beautiful words... You've got an artist's touch!Author's Response: Thank you so much for the fantastic review! I don't even know how to reply to your praise! ^_^ Report Review
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