This story is so lovely! Your characters are so lovable and real, and I have no idea why you don't have more reviews for this story! This is my first review on this site (and I've been reading for a while), and it had to be for this fanfiction, because it deserves so much more love than it is receiving. Please keep writing! :) :)

Author's Response: This is the loveliest message, and I can't thank you enough for pausing to leave it. I think perhaps I'm all too plotless and dawdling for people, but it's the only way words come to me, some folk like it-and I'm so glad of it, but I think it's too slow for many. I'll do my best to find more words for Maddy soon, I've had her around in my head for many years now, and she'll probably never go away; it would make me less mad if it were actually written someplace too. Anyway! Thank you so so much, you're lovely!

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i love this story so much!! please keep posting chapters and whatnot. maddy's character is very intriguing to me, and elliot is so lovely. i wish i had an elliot in my life bahahahha

anywho, i've just read all the chapters of this in one go, and i fully intend on keeping up with this story as much as possible. i can't wait to see what happens next! :)

Author's Response: Oh, you wonderful thing. I will do my best to keep posting, I promise! Sometimes I have trouble with it, mostly because I've had it in my head for so many years now, getting it out seems hard. But more will come, I swear it! Haha.

I had someone a bit like Elliot once, but he wasn't as strong-I think that's the word, but yes, he's lovely-I'd like the genuine thing myself sometimes ha.

Thank you so much for reading and loving it, it means the world x

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LOVEE. UPDATE PLEASE

Author's Response: I will as soon as I can, I promise! I know its been ridiculously long. I've started again on my other story, so soon, this one should get a burst too. Thank you so much, lovely creature!

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Elliot is very persistent which seems to be precisely what is needed to get to know Madeline. I like that she has yet to admit to liking Elliot - with words - it's rather endearing really.

I wonder who her father's lot are.

Author's Response: Elliot is a pro at persistence, and Madeline is in denial about many thing, so admitting such a thing would take a miracle, haha. Thank you so much for reviewing, I hope you enjoy!

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"charming, the word you want is charming."
Elliot is a champ! Love the story so far!
Cheers!

Author's Response: Ah, he was originally inspired by a boy I knew. Who, in the end, for all his charm, lost it. I cling to the positives and Elliot florishes, haha. Thank you so much for reviewing! It's so lovely to know someone's enjoying my rambles x

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Great! I loved the dinner scene. Well, not loved exactly--it was obviously uncomfortable, tense and painful--but the dialogue was extremely realistic and the characters were very lifelike. Eliot is also getting more and more intriguing. Did he apparate to Maddy's side? Is he perhaps a wizard?

I've got to go, but I'll be back to read the next chapters!

Favorite line: "As though her pudding would drag peace in tow."

Author's Response: Oh thank you so much. I always struggle with conflict, aha, just because everyone reacts so differently, and keeping it realistic, and making sure they bounce off one another is such a juggle. Poor Penny, I genuinely sympathise with her, drama isn't her forte. x

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Your writing is really beautiful! I like how you've allowed the characters of Madeline and Eliot to emerge subtly, mainly through dialogue and description. They are both very intriguing! I'm also very curious about Madeline's family problems...guess I'll have to keep reading. ^_^

Favorite phrase so far: "loonish cherub." Brilliant!

Author's Response: Thank you so much, it's lovely to hear so. I find it fun to let the characters and story tell themselves in a way. I hope you enjoy further discoveries =]

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Hi, electricfeel here with your review. Sorry it's taken so long to get back to you, just been a little busy.

Anyway, I really enjoyed this chapter. It felt unique and interesting, it all flowed so well that I was completely lost in the story at one point and your descriptions were fantastic. I especially loved the line "as though the sun had never been anything more than a rumour". Really good.

Your main character Madeline (or Maddy, or Grey! haha) has been set up really well. She obviously has family issues that have been touched upon here and there, that intrigue the reader to read more. But it's Elliot who really steals the show. He really is a fantastic OC; he's likeable, interesting, funny, charming. Personally, I find him completely fascinating, I can't wait to read more of him!

The plot itself was rather lovely. The dancing in the rain, the meeting a new boy, the finding refuge in a small cafe. It's all very sweet. But then, there's this more mysterious side; how big a role does Alice play? What's going on with her dad? Raising big questions like this early on really pulls in your reader, I think you've handled the plot really well.

Overall, I thought this was perfect as it is. I hate doing a review with offering CC but I don't think you need to change a thing. If anything, I would say that you seem to be on the right track with this first chapter and I'm sure the other chapters should follow on nicely from it.

Author's Response: Oh god, you are honestly too sweet. I almost think that's what scares me most about this story-it feels so long ago that I typed this that I can almost read it as an outsider. Elliot and Grey seem to own me more than the other way round which is sodding intimidating. Nonetheless, thankyou so so much for another lovely review. You send my confidence flying =/

x


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Wow, love.
You really outdid yourself!
He's the type of boy I want for myself. He sounds just like the artsy indie boys we talk about.

Author's Response: I know, P. We'll find our own eventually, lovely.

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Oh its lovely to get an update at last! I was purging my favourites list the other day, and I am so glad I kept this story. It is quirky, whimsical and a delight to read.
Massive kudos for all the 'Anne' references! also loved loved the 'Longbottom Ears'

Concrit:
I have to say. after reading this after a long gap, Alice is a little to OTT. She is funny and original, but just a bit too exaggerated.

Other than that, looking forward to more!

Author's Response: And it's completely lovely to know you kept it all this time! I'm glad too, haha. Your words are so nice to read, it's brilliant to know the essence of this story is managing to find you. I always worry the excessive description could become an irritant, but I'd hate to lose it, because it's kind of the point this time round. =]

Equally lovely to know that someone's getting my references, haha! Gilbert's like a Mr Darcy, without the superiority I guess...And Frank? Frank scares me, lol.

I wonder if it's weird to say I'm really, really glad Alice is annoying you? It's just I always assume it's Madeline and her general...indecisive-ish-ness that'll drive people mental first. I'll happily look into Alice, but I don't ever seem to have much control over her =]

This is getting plenty long now, so I'll scurry off. But thankyou so so much for coming back after all this time and leaving such a lovely splash of feedback. Very much appreciated!

-Rose

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Ah! I'm so happy you updated. This chapter was great. PLEASE update soon! I can't go a few months without another chapter!
10/10!

Author's Response: Oh wow! It's so so lovely that you're still around to read this story =]

I've been so dodgy and bad with updating, I'm almost scared that my writing style won't even match itself. Haha

I'm really glad you enjoyed it though! And I promise it won't be a smidge as long for chapter six, another two weeks and I should have something postable =]

Thanks so much for reviewing!

-Rose

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It's a very nice story. Can't wait to read more.

Author's Response: Aw, thankyou so much!

I hope you continue to enjoy it =] It's about time I coughed another chapter up.

Thanks a tonne for taking the time to review, too. It always means a lot!

-Rose =]

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Why must you make fun of Frank? I hear he was lovely back in Hogwarts...

Wait. Nobody knows you make fun of Frank. Only me because I'm special. :D

Author's Response: Gee, thanks, P. Flaunting your connections much? Lmao. But who said nice guys can't have laugh-worthy features? Alice'll love him anyway, because JK said it was so =)

'Sides, he is lovely, because I wouldn't give my little Alice any less. Or I hope he is...I intend for him to be.

x

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I can't wait until Elliot and Madddie totally get together. :D

Author's Response: In some...cheesily horrendous scene? Me either, to be honest. I get urges to type quick snog scenes in halls, but you know, Maddy'd never forgive me.

Later on though, maybe she will?

love xx




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i love elliot.
he makes me cream.

Author's Response: If he existed, I couldn't bare to let you have him. lol. He's up there with Gilbert, above my ape-as you so eloquently call him. Ape's still in third you know.

Cream away, there'll be more of him soon. You'll read it the minute it's readable. =)

I'm off to comment, aren't I P? Yes. You're beautiful, that's what.


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why is your writing so amazing?

Author's Response: Because I've charmed you into thinking so with my...er, wand? Insert a wink about here, a laugh, and an 'Aww, P!'

You're a doll, you are, you are.

xx

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interesting cryptic ending. Great job on Elliot and Grey's dialogue, and Elliot's mother was perfect for him. There were some grammar issues, for instance, the second and third sentences ought to be combined, the third has no predicate, and the subject is only there because it's implied from the second sentence. There was a place or two where you mixed up the gender of your pronouns. Also, the sisters were a bit stiff as characters, if you get what that means, but I really loved Penny. All in all these are only superficial issues and I positively LOVED this chapter, 10/10 and I don't give those easily. Keep up your fantastic work, Ran

Author's Response: Thank you so much! It's completely lovely to see you enjoyed it, because I think this chapter is one of my favourites. I stressed about it quite a bit, because as I've said, me and out-right angst don't really get along. But El and his ending, he really made me happy for going along with it. Cryptic=That's lovely, that is.

I'm definitely interested in your critique, I had some trouble with the sisters, and hearing that you've noticed it, I'll try and go over it and see if I can smooth them in a little.

There was something in my head reminding me it was a dinner table during the 1960s, and Madeline was sort of...an unwanted house guest. I didn't know how to juggle it, I suppose. But I do understand your meaning, and I'll see what I can do.

Penny was an instant character. She wasn't really what I had originally intended. Naturally, one's head automatically goes to the nasty step mother. But I'm so glad I found her instead. So less cliched. Even though the entire circumstance still screams it =P

Again, thank you so much! Another really extra-lovely, helpful review.

-Rose.

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Great job creating Elliot, he's an absolutely lovable character, charmingm honest, perfect for this story, as was the old lady and her ranting. Great job pairing them all up, if this was a movie, I think it' have to have some fantasticly clever actress like Ellen Page as your star, hmm, well her or Emma Watson.

Author's Response: Elliot. I do love him, and I'm very glad you do too...He's a bit difficult sometimes, a bit evasive in my head. I can't help but want to pedestal him, I suppose, but he's got his faults so he won't let me...

A lovely review here, it's nice to know you think my characters fit together. Sometimes it's easy to forget that the story doesn't spell out everything I think into their story and intentions...you know, I understand why he's there, and why Madeline reacts the way she does...But you have to like it without knowing all the background reasonings... I'm digging myself into a hole of nonsense. Forgive me =)

Oh, and...I'd vote for Ellen.


-Rose

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loving the story, but I don't understand why Madeline is so hesitant to befriend Elliot. Because he'll make her talk about her father? I guess that makes sense.

Author's Response: I'll try and help =)

Madeline's a pretty private person. She thinks herself round in circles rather than talk to someone about it, unless it's Alice, who gets the most honest answers about everything from her. Elliot caught her when she was in a bit of a hole. She didn't have Alice, but she couldn't keep it entirely to herself.

So she opened up to a stranger, under the happy impression she could let herself go, and not have to worry about them after she'd left.

If Elliot hadn't been a friendly Muggle in a coffee shop, she'd never have gone back to talk to him.

So she ends up feeling somewhat betrayed when he turns up in her life. He knows things he never would have if he'd been honest with her from the start. I suppose she's more annoyed at herself than anything.

Does that help?

Thank you so much for your lovely reviews! =)
-Rose.

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Yay! Elliot-Jester-Git is at Hogwarts. I can't believe he knew they were both Hogwarts students and didn't say anything...

Author's Response: In his weak defence, he only had a hunch she was a witch...so he couldn't just declare it. But he could have managed something subtly, if he'd wanted to. But he sort of got that Madeline wouldn't want to know him if he did. She wouldn't have been as willing to, anyway.

Lmao. But "Yay!"

Thank you!
-Rose

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great chapter! apparently, i need to meet 20 characters.

Author's Response: Hehe. I appreciate you taking the time to provide said twenty =)

I love this chapter quite dearly, even though I was terrififed writing it. So it's really...extra-lovely to know you liked it! the end never leaves me feeling nice though, because I know what Madeline's like. Which bits she'll store to memory, and which bits she won't. Entirely hopeless sometimes, she is, she is.

Anyway. Thankyou, again =)

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I like this story! The dialogue is witty and wonderful!

Author's Response: Oh wow! That's so lovely =) And I'm tremendously glad to hear you think so, thank you! I hope you enjoy the rest just as much!

-Rose.

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Woohooo
My account is back.. previously known as flibberty_gibbet, I eagerly await the next installment.. to the detriment of my Psych exam..no pressure or anything!

Author's Response: Lovely to see you again! I'll do my very best, I promise...xD

Admittedly I've been horrible and distractable recently, but the past few days I have been refocusing on Maddy and El. I had to pull back for a bit, you know, because I was in the sort of mood that meant they'd end up paying dearly if I tried to write. Relationship woes, death etc.

Which er, wouldn't be all that great. =P

Glad to know you're back && thanks for reviewing!
-Rose.

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What a cliffie!! Please update soon... i need quality prose to procrastinate with rather than study

Author's Response: Haha, really? Brilliant! I'll try my best to provide, can't promise quality, but you know, we can hope for the best =)

Study...You poor soul. I'm terribly glad you chose my story by means of procrastination though. I'm rather exhausted tonight, so I will probably curl up and cough up a bit more. So soon, you'll have more =)

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I'm impressed. I'm rather fatigued of the endless cliches I've been seeing everywhere, and so far your tale is..
charming
I think me I want an elliot. certainly I want to read more!

Author's Response: Oh! Thank you so much. Wow. Really lovely to hear, that is. I've always supposed it was cliche, but you know, hopefully not the gouge-your-eyes-out-with-a-rusty-cooking-utensil kind. I've never even hoped for charming though xD Charming. Golly, I like that.

And Elliot. If you find one, express post him my way. I'd pay handsomely. =P

Thank you for reviewing!

-Rose.

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