This story is so amazing! I can't wait to read more! Beautifully written! Report Review
Oh, I really like this! You can get loads of description into this without turning it into full-blown purple prose, and it works really well :)
Only one tiny little niggling thing that annoys me - Leonard Cohen actually wrote Hallelujah, Wainwright just covered it :)
Apart from that, I love it! 10/10 Report Review
just wanted to say i loveee ur interpretation of draco, and i love your pure-blood-victorian crap. its a really cool way of looking at itAuthor's Response: Haha, thank you, I guess I was reading too much Victorian lit at the time :) Report Review
EEK! You need to update! Report Review
WOW! This story is incredibly good. It isn't often that I come across such... well, what should I call it? Brilliance? You have an amazing talent for characterizing people and your writing is beautiful. Eloise is probably my favorite OC in the entire world of HP OCs, and that's saying a lot considering how many of those there are. :D Report Review
You had better update, or I will grow angry. And harass you.
I love this story, it is so well-written! :D Report Review
Amazing story, i just read all twelve chapters and i am begging for more :D. Keep writing please!
Nicole Report Review
hello, SilverThimble from the forums here :) I've been meaning to read this story for ages now, so your request gave me a little push ;]
It's wonderfully written and the plot is very interesting already. Some of your turns of phrase and metaphor were amazing : They were the colors of poisonous berries., her breath a frosty ghost in the air. Description and dialogue were also brilliant.
I loved your characterisation, it felt so real :It would have ruined his robes, thought Draco.: that was so... Lucius, really. I also love Eloise ; she's an OC who has a proper place in the story, not just shoved in randomly. And has a personality.
At this point I have nothing negative to say. I know it's your newer chapters you're concerned about, so I'll keep reading and leave a review at the end :)
100%Author's Response: thank you so much! i really do appreciate your help. i want to continue this story so badly but i just don't see a way to do it without losing its original feel... i was hoping somebody could help me with that. so thanks again, i really do appreciate it. Report Review
YOU UPDATED! *pause for jumping and screaming* AH!
Okay, so that was my reaction when I first saw you updated...2? weeks ago. I've FINALLY managed to sit down and read it all the way through and FINALLY give a review!
Beautiful chapter! I loved the part with the house, the pictures on the fireplace, the piano...and Draco...*sigh* I love that you brought the gothicness back to it, so beautifully done. It was the perfect way to get Eloise to remember her dad.
Have to admit I'm not crazy about the beginning with Fleur. The whole Versace thing, mixed with Fleur's having redecorated the room...I felt it came off as silly and pointless. I like that you got Fleur into it but...yeah, I don't wanna sound mean because you know I love this story. I have several problems with that scene, and as always do what you want but I'm going to say my opinions anyway ;)
I felt it was pointless because Ginny or Hermione or even Molly could just as well have given her a dress and it wouldn't have changed the story one bit. Maybe you were trying to lighten the mood? I think it was too bright and shiny. I imagine a beautifully poetic classical song gliding along in seemless harmony, then all of a sudden the radio crackles and in pops Britney Spears' Oops I Did It Again for a couple of beats and then pops back to the classical music. It gave me a WTF?? kind of feeling. Sorry.
Second, Eloise thought Versace was a muggle designer, didn't even know he did magical designs? According to you, Eloise has lived a VERY sheltered life. How would she know about Versace? And why bring Versace into it at all??? Never in this story is brand names or specific designers ever brought to importance.
Third (yes, there's a third...sorry), why, oh WHY does Fleur redecorate the room??? I'd think that if it could be done, Molly would have taken care of it a long time ago. Everybody's living in dark squalor and then comes this woman that manages to change her dingy living quarters to a bright French style master bedroom? It doesn't fit and it comes off as silly. I apologize for ranting. Please don't hate me :)
So anyway, there's my thoughts. As always, take them for what you will. Another lovely chapter! Please don't make us wait so long next time ;)Author's Response: You definitely made some great points. I really just put that in there to contrast the shiny stuff with Eloise's dreary Victorian lifestyle, and because I wanted her to have a change of clothes and she's taller than Hermione and Ginny, wereas I pictured Fleur being about her height. But you're definitely right, it seems pointless to have her now and you pointed out some really good plot holes... I wasn't happy with how that scene turned out anyway. I was originally going to have Eloise make a huge transition here (physically) to get on with the transition in her emotions later in the chapter, and have her whack off her hair, but that just seemed too Disney.
No, really, don't be sorry! I think I'm actually going to take that scene out now. You made really good points, and I was worried about not being able to stick to the gothic-y thing, and that scene definitely just took away from it. So thanks a lot, really! Your reviews are always helpful. Report Review
I know how you feel completely about school getting in the way. Love the update. It was very poetic in a sense. Especially with Leonard Cohen's song (as you said, it's most famously sung by Rufus Wainwright). It really made the whole sad and gothicness of the story come out. Great chapter, I can't wait for more!
~AlexAuthor's Response: wow, i had no idea that rufus wainwright didn't even write it... well i feel uncultured. and i thought myself to be somewhat of a music guru. haha, thank you very much for your kind words though, and i will definitely try to update sooner! Report Review
I agree, Hallelujah is indeed a spectacular song. But what is even more spectacular is this chapter! I got literal goosebumps it was so marvelous! It is amazing how well you have portrayed the characters from the book, they are not unrealistic at all. Fleur was absolutely perfect, I thought.
I love the relationship that is growing between Draco and Eloise, it's so entertaining and suspensful! There are so many things that could happen!
Like always, I'm trying to think of some helpful criticism, but this story is honestly as brilliant as Dumbledore (that was a very lame similie, but Dumbledore is indeed very brilliant). Really, it's the only story I read on here. But anyway, I've dragged this out so long it has become painful (but I just can't tell you how splendid it is!)Author's Response: haha, dumbledore was indeed brilliant :] and wow, the only story you read? that is such a huge compliment, really! thank you so much. and if you like rufus wainwright's hallelujah, you should definitely check out the cover of it that imogen heap did... AMAZINGLY beautiful. anyway, thank you for your review! Report Review
oh my im so glad you updated! yes its been forever! your story has a v promising plot and ur Draco is just so dark and dangerous! *swooons* Eloise comes off very classy and she and Draco make such a lovely couple :) I have the impression things are getting personal between them and i cant wait! Sorry this is my first review (cos i thought you werent gonna fin this) but pls pls update soon and dont give this up. cheersAuthor's Response: bah, don't even worry. i'm happy to have any reviews :] and yeah, it's SO hard to keep eloise a good kid. like i think i just need to write a fake chapter where she gets hammered and graffitis some buildings and becomes a prostitute, just so i can get it out of me. but anyway, thank you so much for the review! i really do want to finish this story. i've had new plot ideas come up, different than the ones i had planned before, so we'll see! Report Review
Another great chapter. I like the melancholy in this one: the lonliness, the freedom, the reminiscing. I absolutely love the relationship she has with Draco. There's so much in between them, much that has been left unspoken, but still... There's something there and they know it deep down. And I don't even know if I refer to something akin to romance. But just... something. The song is awesome and I could hear it vividly inside my head and see them ahead of me there. I don't know, it felt very real. And I love the mention of Versace and that he's a wizard! That was amazing! Anyways -- I really want you to finish this too y'know, 'cause it has so much potential and the relations between the characters are written so well. This is one of the few AU and the only story where there's an OC character set in the Hogwarts (now, kind of post-Hogwarts) era that I've come to adore. So, keep it up and well done so far ^_^Author's Response: wow, really? the only one? what a compliment. :D thanks! i'm really glad you stuck with this story and i apologize for being so lazy with it! Report Review
Wow, it has been such a long time. Well worth the wait though, really enjoyed this chapter. Bring some more soon!!Author's Response: haha, i'm surprised readers have stuck with this. thanks so much! Report Review
This is a very interesting story.
I wasn't all that into it at first, but it definitely got better as it went on. I don't know why, it just seemed a bit dull in the beginning (but that's alright, some of the best books I've ever read start off so incredibly dull I'm amazed I actually got past it to read the ultra fab rest).
I like that you keep Draco in character while still allowing for the good that we all know is in him.
Eloise is a good, well-rounded character that has a lot of potential. She has a childish, naive quality about her that is a great contrast to Draco's wordly sarcasm. It keeps their relationship from becoming too cliche.
Your writing is excellent, really no criticism there...
Overall Grade: E+
R!N!Author's Response: haha, don't even worry about the beginning seeming dull. i can't expect everyone to like it, can i? :] thank you so much for your input. glad you liked it, once you got past a certain point. haha Report Review
Oh, how cute.
I love Eloise.
I'll definitely stick around(:Author's Response: how grand! :] i'm excited. really sorry i haven't updated, the next chapter is coming slowly but surely! Report Review
I love the story and can't wait for the next chapter. Do you have any idea when it will be done?Author's Response: ehhhh... like i said, i'm super busy right now with classes and whatnot, but hopefully soon! thanks for sticking around. :] Report Review
Great chapter! The last part confused me a little, I’m not sure whether Draco was truly there or not, but I’m sure you’d explain it later. Again, your description is brilliant. I could picture everything in my head, just like watching a movie. I love how Draco blew up at Eloise, and it’s kinda sad how he believed that it was all his fault. Mrs. Weasley’s appearance was refreshing and brought some humour to the story, especially when she mothered Eloise and scolded Ginny for not offering a change of clothes. All in all, you did a good job. Keep it up!Author's Response: yeah, eloise imagined all of it. i think it actually says "she had imagined it all," haha. ;] i really wanted to give draco a chance to finally blow up at somebody, since he hadn't really done that at all so far. thanks for the review! Report Review
LOVE THIS STORY.
Thanks for updatin' (:Author's Response: well you're welcome. :] Report Review
Somehow there were points in the story where you spelled everything out a little too much and left little mystique about the scene. I love your writing, but one of the earlier chapters would rate better description wise. The last bit was more like you, though. More emotion filled. Nevertheless, The Wild is an awesome story!Author's Response: yeahhh. it was even worse before... i was really playing up the cold and whatnot because i was having a block and trying to fight through it. it needs to be fixed... thanks for letting me know. :] Report Review
Ooh. I have an idea! I'm not going to say it yet though :)
GREAT JOB. This story is very AU, but very Awesome :)Author's Response: haha, your idea is probably right. :] a lot of people have made guesses about certain things... and that's all i'm saying. anyway, i'm so glad i've got a new reader! thank you again for your kind words. Report Review
wow. i can really sense that this will be an awesome story :)Author's Response: :] thank you! i'm excited for you to read on. Report Review
You must update soon. I am in love with this fiction!Author's Response: :] thank you. the next chapter is coming kind of slowly because of school, but i'll try to get it posted soon! Report Review
Wow. This is a hell of a powerful chapter.Author's Response: thaaaankss... i can't remember which chapter this is, is it the one where everybody dies? wow. i should probably research my own writing some... Report Review
Another wonderful chapter :)Author's Response: again, thank you. haha Report Review
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