Reading Reviews From Member: patronus_charm
1,399 Reviews Found

Review #1, by patronus_charmDarkened Allure: Under The Starlight Gaze

19th October 2014:
Hey again Avi!

ďYour words did not cause any trouble at all,Ē she lied, and her eyes finally left his.
ďThen whatís making you unable to focus in class?Ē he asked her.

So much banter between the two! Wah, I really love Blaise here with the way he teases her gently like that as it draws her out of her serious side and makes her more relaxed and thatís nice to see. Also just quickly, I think this is only my second Hermione/Blaise story but Iím really enjoying it so far!

Woah, woah, woah, they kissed? I did not call it, I really didnít. I know I was talking about banter before but I did not see that coming and it was so rushed yet so cute and perfect as a first kiss and I ♥ it. Another thing I liked was all there references to Krum as theyíre working really well as he was sort of forbidden romance like Blaise is, so itís really cool what youíre doing here.

One small CC with this chapter is that I found there were a lot of short sentences, especially towards the beginning of the chapter, meaning it messed up the overall flow a little so if you used more connectives and made them longer I think it would really help with it :)

Wait. What? What? What? How. How. How. I have no words. Why do this to me Avi? They just kissed and he did that? Maybe he got angry about all the Krum references? But still, I did not call that either. My mind is blown. I need to read on and figure out more because itís just so rfpojerpogjrgtb.

Wah massive plot twist and the Blaise and Draco scene just left me feeling more confused but I have a feeling Voldemort commissioned this. So confusing. Please update? ♥

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Review #2, by patronus_charmDarkened Allure: Fascination

19th October 2014:
Hey Avi, sorry for the slight delay in the reviews but here I am :D

Ooh ooh ooh I loved the beginning bit with all the description and just Hermione thoughts as it built up the chapter so well and really helped with the suspense. It was just laden with mystery and the sense of foreboding it was great because when Hermione did start speaking there was even more suspense and excitement as you had built it up so well though it did lead me to start fearing for Hermioneís life a little :P

The constant references to Malfoy throughout her exchange with Blaise was interesting as I have a feeling he might play an important role in the story. If he does, it will be interesting to see whether he either falls for Hermione or ends up hating her. I think it could go either way. But anyhow, more on Hermione and Blaise because I liked the fact Malfoy was talked about as it helped me fit him into Hogwarts society a little more and help me understand what he was doing there.

I thought Hermioneís emotions were really well and you really managed to capture her complex relationship with Blaise and how she sort of did like him, but it felt so wrong but her heart was urging her on. It was all so complex and great but I really loved reading it and I canít wait to get to the next chapter, great start!

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Review #3, by patronus_charmslowly: and then all at once

5th October 2014:
Hey Sarah, here for the review battle!

Wah this was so cute and so adorable and just so wahahahaha worthy and I really loved it. I loved how the quote fitted around the whole story because it was slowly revealed to us what day this was for Lily and that was so cool as well using the quote to explain how she fell in love and it just worked together really well and I really admire that.

All those cute little Lily and Harry moments were so adorable and I loved them all. You really gave us a cute snippet of their relationship and wrote it really well. I could really sense Harryís pride as he walked his daughter the aisle and Lily just seemed to love him so much and yeah they were adorable! ♥

Another small thing I want to comment on is that this was so well developed for such a small word count. I really love stories like that as it really takes talent to do that and you should be really proud of how well I felt Lily despite it only being 700 words or so.

Even though it was meant to be all cutesy and romantic, there were lovely bits of humour mingled in there from James being the charming older brother and laughing at his sister to Lily tripping and thatís just what made the story even more adorbs.

Lovely story, Sarah!


Author's Response: Hi Kiana!

I'm so glad that you liked this story! I was having all sorts of fluffy wedding feels listening to this song, so i just had to write this. I'm glad that you liked my integration of the quote. I honestly didn't think of it until I was about to start writing and it fit so well with the song I coulnd't help myself.

I honestly had so much fun writing those Lily and Harry moments. I'm so glad that you enjoyed reading them. I wanted to show how close they were and how big of a rock he was for his daughter, because in my opinion, I think he'd be an incredible dad.

Thank you so very much. I don't even have words for how much that compliment means to me. I think I work better in shorter word amounts and I'm glad that you enjoyed it. I was proud before, but now I'm just bursting. Thank you. ♥

I had to write Lily tripping. It just seemed perfect to fit in there. Thank you so much for this lovely review, I'm glad you liked the story!

xoxo Sarah ♥

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Review #4, by patronus_charmWhen The Storm Breaks: Good Night, Good Luck

2nd October 2014:
Hi Lia, sorry for the lateness but Iím finally here for our exchange!

Ooh I really loved your opening description, all your description for that matter as it was so dark and intriguing and really fitted in with the mood of the story. I thought it was really great that you put a lot of emphasis on it as I could really imagine the pureblood society you were writing about, and just added so much to the story.

Another minor but sort of related point but I really loved the effort you went into with your dialogue and their thoughts too, and how you made it appropriate for their social class. Even though this is going to sound kind of weird but it made it so much more fun to read and I really appreciated the effort you put into that.

Livia is a really intriguing character and Iím really liking my first impressions of her. I also have a feeling that thereís going to be some really interesting backstory to her and that sheís had lots of twists and turns in her past so I hope that turns out to be true. Another thing I liked was the friendly banter she had with Lucius and Felix about her husband because you rarely see purebloods open up whereas this was a nice opportunity to see that and see the real them too.

Luciusís character is an intriguing one too with the way he felt pity for what happened to Benjy Fenwick because it seems as if his time at Hogwarts wasnít a stereotypical one when you think of either Malfoys or Slytherins so I hope thatís explored more throughout the story too. Also, Felix seems like a cool character too and I canít wait to see more of him!

Overall, a great first chapter :D


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Review #5, by patronus_charmOnly a Piece of Wood: Prologue: Unexpected

14th September 2014:

Aw, I really loved how you gave Oliver so much backstory as really made him a well-developed character and such an interesting one too! I never expected his parents to play such a big part in the war, so that was a really nice twist as it added even more to his back-story and though it gave hints to where they allegiances lay during the war, I canít wait to see it explored further.

I really liked the top hop too as it was nice to see Oliver in a later stage of his life. He was actually so adorable even though it was a really brief cameo but that line about always wanting to fly just made me aw a little too much. I liked the top hop for another reason too because we could see the before and after effects of the war and I wonder how important these little moments of his life will be later on in the story.

As this was such a short chapter, Iím going to review the next one too! ♥


Author's Response: Hey thank you for the swap I hope you enjoy this as much as I enjoyed Ides of March.

I love this story so much I gotta get back to writing it I just don't know how, for now I'm just rereading the chapters getting to know the characters again and so forth.

I love Oliver and I've always wondered what kind of life he had outside of being Quidditch Captain so I came up with this little fic in hopes to answering my own doubts. I love the line about always wanting to fly, I'll keep it in the chapter even after I edit it :)

Thank you again for the swap, hope we can do this again in the future!


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Review #6, by patronus_charmFanged Revolution: Chapter the First

14th September 2014:
Hi Olivia!

Ooh I really loved the background you built up for Nightstalker as it was just so intriguing and different and left me wanted to know more and more about them. Even though I get the feeling he is a dark character whoís probably done a lot of bad stuff given how he beat up Septimus, I have a feeling heís going to be one who you just canít help but fall in love with too. Plus, the fact heís a vampire makes him even cooler.

Your descriptions in this chapter were really great and had this wonderful dark, gothic vibe about them which just drew me in and kept me mesmerised. Another thing which was really good was the way you slipped in all those little additions about what it was like to live on the dark side of life so to speak and a great example of that was with how the vampire had extra special powers. It was just such a nice touch and really added a lot to the story!

One thing I might suggest to improve the flow of the story is perhaps group some of your paragraphs together because on the whole they are a little on the small side which means the flow of the story isnít as great, but making them a little bigger should solve that. :)

Great first chapter though! :)


Author's Response: Hi Kiana!

Nightstalker is indeed a troubled character, and I'm glad you like him. Septimus isn't innocent either (he's a Malfoy, no good comes from Malfoys in high places), but that's not the point. Nightstalker has a dark background that will be revealed in future chapters (once I figure out exactly what that background is.)

Vampires definitely don't have an easy life here. When I planned this I took inspiration from Lupin's description of his struggles as a werewolf and thought that it could be applied to vampires, over two hundred years earlier. (Nothing has changed.) Their special powers are some of the more common ones from a Wikipedia article I found (there's no Twilight abilities in here; if they go in the sun, they die. They don't sparkle.)

I'll take the CC in mind when I write Chapter 4, and make bigger paragraphs. In my defence, they look bigger on Microsoft Word :)

Thanks for the lovely review!


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Review #7, by patronus_charmThrough The Darkest: A Case Worth Waiting For

13th September 2014:
Hey Ashwini!

Oooh I loved the first section as it was so full of mystery and darkness and exciting things it really tied into the title and set the story up so well! This is a really random note but I loved your choice of names, because they seemed to have a spooky element about them which just added so much to the story. The people in it seemed to be such a motley crew of them I wonder how theyíre all connected together.

One thing to be careful is your dialogue punctuation as I noticed several instances where it was off such as here ĎďEnough for two, if you please,Ē it was almost an order.í And here ĎďSure, madam.Ē He muttered under his breath. He was very suspicious.í With the first, it was almost an order isnít a dialogue tag, so the speech should be followed by a full stop and it should be capitalised. For the second, it is a dialogue tag, so there needs to be a comma after madam and he should be lowercase. Iím sorry I havenít explained it very well but there are some great tutorials on the forums which should make it clearer!

Cress seems cool! I really liked her character as she seemed really intriguing and someone I could easily get along with. Her interaction with Hermione was especially interesting as it was strange to see that Cress was the one giving the help as you would expect it to be the other way round. I canít help but wonder what on earth has happened to Ginny though and whether thatís connected to the first section or not.

Oooh wait a sec it does seem as if itís connected which makes it even more exciting. I really liked the omniscient voice at the end of it though with the way destiny has planned out everything for her as I canít wait to see what on earth destiny has in store for her!

Great chapter!


Author's Response: Hello Kiana! It was great to see you! :)

The first section was just to make the beginning a little dark and interesting. I'm so glad you thought it worked! Haha and I won't deny that I chose the names on purpose! :P I wanted the names to have a mysterious kind of aura around them, and Aenor sounds like such an interesting name!

Thanks for pointing that out! English is not my native language, so sometimes it's a little hard to be accurate about the grammar and punctuation. I think I'm lucky you people are around to help me! :D

Cress is one of my most favorite OCs. :) She's inspired from various detectives I've read about so maybe she sounds like a nice combination of all of them. :)

Hermione was very close to Ginny and as we have seen in the books, that girl can be extremely emotional at times. She is tired of worrying about Ginny and it's like they are just searching and searching but nothing happens. That's why Cress had to comfort her, I think.

Yes, the first section is definitely linked to Ginny and her disappearance! Destiny has quite a plan on her mind... I hope you'll want to come back for more!

Thanks for the lovely review! I really appreciate it! :D


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Review #8, by patronus_charmKiller in Me and the Killer in You: Killer in Me and the Killer in You

12th September 2014:
Hey there!

Ooh this was really interesting to read as it was such a unique viewpoint and I honestly never expected Rodolphus to be like that when I started reading it. I really liked the fact he genuinely seemed to love and care for Bellatrix as it does give me some hope that the Death Eaters were in fact somewhat normal.

You included tons of little mannerisms to show that he did care for her which was really sweet and I really loved them all. I think my favourite one and the one which stayed with me for the longest was the one when he was trying to get her to eat and push her a long a little bit more so she could be with her Dark Lord again and that strange idea was really interesting to read.

The ending was really sad! I never thought I would pity a Death Eater but I certainly did then because while they were in Azkaban there was no Dark Lord and no rival for his affections so Bellatrix was just his, but now they were out of it again he was back in second place and just generally forgotten. Though, it just goes to show how great your characterisation of him was if you made me pity him which was something I never thought would have happened.

Great one-shot! :D


Author's Response: Hi Kiana!

I thought that since we only know one-side of Bellatrix and Rodolphus's relationship I would write my view of the other side. Although the Death Eaters certainly aren't normal, they can love - a canon example being Lucius Malfoy.

Rodolphus was fleshed out more than what was presented in the books; he was a minor, malevolent character who, it was assumed, was entirely bad. The fact that JKR didn't say what Rodolphus felt towards his wife gave me so much room to write this. He's definitely torn between two goals: serving the Dark Lord and getting Bellatrix to love him back, which is impossible while Voldemort is alive.

I'm glad you enjoyed it and thanks for the lovely review!


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Review #9, by patronus_charmEmpty Promises: Out of the Shadows

7th September 2014:
Hi Mary!

I really loved this was from Scorpiusís perspective, because as this is my OTP Iíve read a fair few Scoroses but we never have enough of Scorpius so yay for that! I really liked how observant he was and he really set the scene well for the typical Hogwarts party. I loved how his narration was almost cynical and like it was beneath him to join in as it added in another layer to his character.

Rose and Scorpius were so cute and adorable together! The little references to Romeo and Juliet were great as I always did imagine the two of them like that in my head so that was really cool. Bahaha, I know I should have been serious when James appeared because yaíknow there romance was threatened but I just couldnít help laughing for some reason. I think it might have been verging on hysterical laughing like you just donít understand this ship, you have to support it even if you donít understand it okay???

One small thing, at the beginning you did a lot of telling the reader what had happened rather than showing which was a shame as I really loved all those little Scorose moments as they were so cute and adorable. What you could do is include a few flashback moments so to extend it a bit more and so we get a more of a feel for them as I think that would be really nice and you can never have too much Scorose!

The ending was so cute! ♥ I really canít wait to see how they battle it out with the others and I really do hope they manage to stay together though. Great chapter :D


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Review #10, by patronus_charmJigsaw: Piece #2

26th August 2014:
Whoo onto chapter two!

Ooh your description at the start! ♥ It was so magical and mystical and I really loved it, and it really set the scene for the chapter. Roxanneís thoughts at that moment were cool too because it meant we got to learn a bit more about her, and it was really nice to see how set she was on solving this crime and how much it meant to her and that passion and drive revealed a lot about her. Also, all that information about the Hit Wizards and how the journalists go about getting information about the crime was really interesting.

I really loved the press conference and how wizards can have them as well as Muggles as that was good bridge between the two worlds. Also, it meant we could find out a lot more about the crime which was really interesting. I love how The Quibbler journalist went and asked the more obscure question of whether he had a job or not whereas everyone else was focused on the crime, they are always the odd onesÖ :P But, I agree with Roxanne, I canít help but worry that this might turn out to be a murder investigation.

Woah another mystery there with Daniel, Iím guessing some sort of old romance here? Iím not sure what to make of him though and the way he warned Roxanne off of this story. Either he really does think she could do something better or he knows something about this crime. The crime would be more interesting because maybe heís secretly evil and involved with the crime and is killing off all the journalists reporting it so thereís no snooping around and ruining it. Okay, that might be a little extreme but weíll have to see.

Great chapter and I canít wait for the next :D


Author's Response: Hi again!

I'm really glad you liked the description at the start of this chapter! I wanted to set the scene because this is kind of an important place in the story and obviously Roxy's really alert since it's her first proper scoop. I'm always a bit worried about overloading with the information but I'm glad you found it interesting!

Yes, I'm working on the basis that there's been some development from the end of the books since this is about thirty years later, and there's been a bigger influence from the Muggles. Haha, Obadiah Bonnette :P

All the mysteries! I think you might be on the right lines with the romance idea - you'll learn a bit more about Daniel in future chapters ;) Oh wow, that's a great theory and not one I've heard yet but it's certainly very interesting :P

Thank you for another great review!

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Review #11, by patronus_charmJigsaw: Piece #1

26th August 2014:
Yaya itís Jigsaw time :D

Woah that first section is so cool and so creepy and had left me wondering so many things, like who is that man, does the teapot have any significance or was it just placed there for the sake of it, and who cast imperio, so many questions and I canít wait to find out the answers! :D

Ooh Roxanne is a journalist, thatís really cool and Iím really liking her so far as she just has this lovely character which draws you in to her. Another thing I liked was the fact she just accepted that her dad was George Weasley and didnít make a big deal about it which was a nice change. Hmm, Violet, hmm, I feel as if sheíll always be someone who goes and raises a lot of questions throughout this story. I bet she has a secret or some connection to the first section, she just seems like that type. So Iím watching you Violet!

Another yay for The Green Grindylow, I really love new magical places so seeing that was really cool and you built it up really well too. Also, the more I read of this the more and more I like Roxanne so another yay for that. I really liked Jane too! There was something really lovely and warm about her that she just drew you in. Listening to their conversation was cool because it meant we get to find out loads about the wizarding world at that time and all the other Weasleys too. It was sweet to see that Ron was still a Chudley Canons fan after all this time too.

Ooh so Higgins is actually nice?! I have to admit I was very suspicious of him at first but then I tend to be suspicious of most person when the storyís a mystery, but heís gone and given Roxanne her first scoop so maybe he canít be that badÖ Well weíll see, and I canít wait to read on and see Roxanne crack this mystery! :D


Author's Response: Ah, Kiana, you're just too good to me!

Haha, I was going for creepy and intriguing so it's great that I seem to have managed that as you're asking questions and wondering about what happened with the man there!

I'm glad you liked Roxy! I didn't want to make a big deal about the fact that her father is George Weasley - obviously it affects her in some ways, but in others she has to make her own way in life and isn't getting ahead in her work just because of her family. Hmm, Violet definitely should be careful if you're watching her! ;)

I'm really glad you liked the Green Grindylow! You create such great magical settings and it was so fun to create this place for Jane and Roxy to hang out in. I'm glad you liked their conversation too and finding out more about what's going on at the time!

I'm with you on suspecting literally everyone when it comes to a mystery but yes, Higgins has finally given Roxanne her first scoop and so now she's got a story to go and crack!

Thank you for your lovely review!

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Review #12, by patronus_charmPlay the Devil: Puzzle

25th August 2014:
Yay a new chapter! :D

Yay they found her and double yay for Richard! He was so sweet and attentive and yeah I just loved him and want to marry him so back away Rose. When Richard got onto Apollo with her and wrapped his arms around her it was so sweet and there were so many squeals and it was so perfect. You really wrote that so well and I am shipping this ship way too much!

Ooh and they talked! I really wonder the castle in the sky is, I have a feeling Richard might turn out either to be magical or a person who hates magic and burns witches so I wonder if this is a sign for one of those things. Or I could be completely wrong so ignore the ramblings if thatís the case.

I really liked the section with Ellyn as it was strange to see how attached Rose had become to the historical world and how she really couldnít leave it. The mentions about missing modern beauty products was very apt and I could see why Rose would be suffering from the lack of it. I canít wait to see where this leads though because we do know that she does go back to the future at some point and then back to the past again so I wonder how she ends up doing it.

Nicholas is interesting and I really liked learning about Hogwarts in that time period. I have a feeling he is the one to watch though and that he could be up to something. Iím not sure what but Iím sure he is, or maybe Iím just suspicious of everyone and thing in this story :P

A great chapter :D


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Review #13, by patronus_charmYour Universe: Stars and Galaxies

25th August 2014:
Okay, I am armed with a cup of tea and I canít wait to read this! ♥ Thank you so much for writing this for me, it means so much and yeah, you are wonderful! :D

Ooh second person POV, it really worked so well here and you know how much I love it, I probably love it a little too much if Iím honest so thank you so much for that!

Okay, but seriously are you trying to break my heart? Just in the first few lines I was stabbed in it and had my feels crushed so much with this line ĎWhen you were dying, you thought of her.í and this ĎDora was expecting.í I really loved how you wrote those two ships as their my favourites, and you wrote them so well. Tedís emotions were so raw and pure and I really could sense his love for them, and how he just kept on clinging on and on but he couldnít and the feels, the feels, I donít think Iíll ever recover. :(

ĎYou arenít just a star, ĎDromeda,í you told her, taking her hands in your own. ĎYouíre a whole galaxy.í *breaks down in tears forever and ever*

But wah their conversation, it was so them and so perfect and I loved it. ♥ Their sentences were so stilted and so poignant it seemed as if both of them knew what was about to happen but were holding themselves in, and it was just written so well. The way you ended it on I love you was perfect because I think those two will always love each forever and ever.

The theme of stars and galaxies and the infinite was really fantastic and fitted in with Andromedaís name and their story was really great. The description and imagery with it was so beautiful too and just showed their love so well.

Whoo, Andromeda time! I didnít expect that but I loved it so much. I really loved how you started with the same line though as it just shows how interlinked they are and perfect and though I keep on saying this, you just wrote them so well so thank you for that! ♥ The little mentions of Teddy were perfect and admittedly made me tear up a bit as I love the idea of him helping his grandmother through and he probably did that for a lot of other people too.

I have no words for the brief flashback of when she said she was leaving home, it was too sweet and moving and wonderful!

The ending, the ending, the ending! ♥ ♥ ♥ It made me want to cry so much as it was so poignant and had this weird solemn air but there was happiness there too and just so many different emotions it was really amazing. The closing line ĎThe two of you were together, and the universe was yours again.í If I could do :wub: I would as it just completed the story so well and really tied up their tale.

Thank you so much for writing this for me, it was amazing and I loved every bit of it! ♥


Author's Response: Kiana! ♥

How could I not write something for you, really? You're the first person I ever properly spoke to on here and you're amazing!

Yay for second person!

Okay, you know that I can't really write fluff very well so I was trying to write something that was kind of romantic and oops it turned out a lot more angsty and sad than I intended... so I'm not *trying* to break your feels, but sorry if I did!

I'm really glad that you liked the way that I wrote Andromeda and Ted together because it was kind of scary, knowing how much you love them and since you've written a great version of them yourself too! The speech was meant to seem stilted and a bit awkward but I'm glad you thought it worked!

I thought the theme of stars and galaxies fit so well with Andromeda's name and I'm glad you liked it, plus it meant I could get some fluffy lines in the story :P

Yay, Andromeda! I didn't expect to write about her either at the very beginning, but she just decided she wanted to pop up and I'm happy you liked her side of it though and Teddy helping her through her grief as well.

The ending! ♥ It was only brief but I'm SO happy that you liked that part as it was kind of my attempt to make things a bit happier and having them together again as they should be.

Thank you so much for this brilliant review, and I'm really happy you enjoyed it! ♥

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Review #14, by patronus_charmThe New Pride of Portree: Flight and Family

1st August 2014:

Wooh Hugo appeared! Heís always been one of my favourite next gen people so I really loved seeing him here. You wrote him as a healer really well and he seemed to be so smooth and professional, it was really cool and I loved him and yeah, he was cool. I wonder what happened to Fitzís shoulder though and this curse which hit him, maybe this was his ex-wife?

Bahaha Fitzís thoughts really made me crack especially the section with the b words as it really showed what a dried sense of humour he had. I especially love how he keeps on noticing all these things about Molly when she seems kinda nonplussed about him and never really pays him that much attention, though I guess I should feel a little sorry about him too.

Ooh so she does like Fitz sort of? Hmm, Iím still not sure if this ship has sailed for me or not, but I will remain on the fence for now. I did love how he had to be brought up at the family dinner and Percy was being awkward and embarrassing about showing him the Weasley way as it was just like, please stop, your embarrassing yourself. I really loved seeing Lucy though and she cracked me up so I hope she appears more throughout this story.

Great chapter :D


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Review #15, by patronus_charmThe New Pride of Portree: The Dreaded Ex

1st August 2014:
Hi again!

Ooh it was interesting to get into Fitzís mind-set here as I really didnít expect it to be like that in a way. His thoughts about Molly certainly did make me life because he already held her in such a high esteem even though they didnít really know one another. His thoughts about his ex-wife were interesting too because I have a feeling that there might be some more backstory here so I canít wait to see whatís going to crop up.

But more on the ex-wife or Mariah as I should say, when doing a team re-shuffle why keep her on the team if sheís so much of a hassle? This seemed kinda weird to me so I have a theory. That theory being that she knows something about Fitz and is blackmailing him with that so she can stay on the team. Iím not sure if thatís accurate but Iíll have to see!

Ok, so she has a story but one I donít really believe but yeah Iím sure sheís blackmailing him! Also, Fitz, Fitz, Fitz, he definitely seems to have a crush on Molly because itís fair enough to turn up for a party, but at that time? And I do not believe the advice thing either, he totally likes her.

Bahaha, Iíve been meaning to say for a while now that I really love all the references to the other Weasley siblings and all their marriages, Iíve never really seen anything like them before so I canít wait to read more as they keep me laughing.

Great chapter :D


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Review #16, by patronus_charmThe New Pride of Portree: The New Lineup

1st August 2014:
Hi again!

Ok, I love the fact that you made Molly and Roxanne close friends in this story as these two never get any screen time in next gen stories, especially not together so this was really great. Another thing I really liked was just their general banter and how easily they bounced off of one another and I canít wait to see more of them later on.

This line ĎďWell, I won't be trotting off and marrying any musicians like you or professional Quidditch players like Lucy. I'm still chasing the same dream. Star Keeper. I'm just going to do it for another team, that's all.Ēí Woah Molly has some sass and I really love how her character is emerging. Another thing I liked was that though she seemed a bit chilled and relaxed now and then, when her thoughts turned to Quidditch she really was passionate about it which was nice to see.

So am I sensing some potential ♥ from Fitz in regards to Molly here? But anyhow, I really loved seeing them together and how Fitz wasnít quite sure how to deal with Mollyís out there character and threat to go and round the others out of their bed.

Another fab line ĎMy family's rather large and 'Weasley' is so non-specific.Ēí ♥ I donít know why this was so great, it just was!

Anyhow, this was another fab chapter and I canít wait to read on :D


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Review #17, by patronus_charmThe New Pride of Portree: The Harpy With the Mohawk

1st August 2014:
Yay Iím so glad that I can finally read this as Iíve heard so many good things about it!

Molly, Molly, Molly ♥ I donít know what to say about her other than her being completely fab and that I love her and want to meet her and for her to become my friend as it would just be so cool and yeah. I always imagined Quidditch players being a little quirky and she fitted right in with that image with the way she had a dyed Mohawk, that small touch was just such a good one.

The Quidditch talk was really interesting with the way it seems as if the Quidditch is going to be potentially shaken up with the reformed Pride of Portree team. I canít wait to see whatís the meaning behind all of these plans and whether this is based upon any old rivalries or anything like that. Though right now Iím not sure if I should be looking forward to seeing the Harpyís reaction to Molly being poached from them.

Your characterisation throughout this chapter was really fantastic and each character was really well developed and I got such a strong sense of them I canít wait to read more about them and see what they get up to. McCormack is definitely the one intriguing me the most because she definitely is a woman on a mission.

Great first chapter :D


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Review #18, by patronus_charmSevenfold: everything you touch, only dies

21st July 2014:
Wooh I just finished my first ever novel too, so high five and congrats as itís such a good feeling, isnít it?

Well, I donít think this ending was unsatisfying as it just left me going wow, wow, wow as I canít really comprehend everything and it was so powerful and so wow and I really loved every chapter of it as it really shed new light on what it was like to be a murderer. The first section really showed that with how Louis just couldnít deal with his mother and her contrasting views and that was shown really, really well.

I liked the links back to the original murders and Ruth Coffman/Ada as it tied up the story really well. It made sense for her to die really because it showed how the Sevenfold murders could never really be repeated again and that now the repetition had ended with Eugenie being caught, she sort of had to die. It doesnít seem to make sense there, but it did in my head. :P

The scene with Victoire and Dominique had such a surreal feel to it and it really showed Louisís detachment from the world really well and yeah it was just great. Gah, I canít seem to explain myself here but what I mean to say is the way you contrasted what they thought normality was to Louisís normality was really great.

The courtroom scene broke my heart because it really showed us why Eugenie did what she did and her motives behind it all but they just didnít want to listen, sort of like when Harry was in court. Admittedly, she had killed 5 people and almost killed a sixth but she just seemed so lost and frail there and I wanted to hug her. Is the sixth victim Louis then? Iím probably really far off it, but itís just what makes sense in my head really.

The ending! ♥ Wow that was so haunting with the way Eugenie had calmly accepted the fact these memories would never fade and would never let her go. It was even worse than with Ada because at least Ada achieved her goal, whereas with Eugenie she never killed her father so she must feel somewhat unfulfilled in a way. It just left me with so many mixed feelings because there was Louis being all cute and supporting Eugenie which made me warm to her, but she was a murderer so I didnít want to in a way, then there was the hint of darkness form Louis when he said he almost wished it was Emily who had been the murderer still. But all of that was so realistic so naturally perfect and I really enjoyed reading this!

This was such a fantastic story and great read, and congrats again on finishing it! :D


Ooh and thank you for the shout-out!

Author's Response: Hi Kiana!! :) Sorry for taking so long to reply to this, and it reminds me that I don't think I've finished reviewing the end of Acanthus yet!! (though I have read the last chapters, woops).

It's such an exciting feeling! Of course I finished this mostly during Camp NaNo but some of the final pieces and edits didn't happen until quite recently.

I'm glad you liked the links back to Ada. Yes, she did have to die, but she was also ready and felt vindicated somehow, if that makes sense. I felt that Ada's long life was a bit of a punishment for her in a way and she atoned by turning in the murderer and was finally brave enough to face the ghosts of her past (literally).

I'm glad that feeling of surrealness and Louis' confused mental state came across well. He's going through a tough time and I thought showing how he can't engage with his family when they're normally so close would show that.

Aw, poor Eugenie! I can't help but love her even though she's a bit of a villain, but clearly something wasn't quite right for her. Okay, the sixth victim was left really vague because I wanted to see if the readers would come to that conclusion through the hints, but in my mind the sixth was meant to be Louis, to parallel with the seemingly tragic and senseless sacrifice of Erik for Ada.

I'm so glad you liekd the ending! Yes, Eugenie failed and pretty much ruined her own life and there's really no happy ending. Louis is being a bit dark and selfish through his infatuation with Eugenie - the Emily thing is just awful of him but he can't help but think those incriminating thoughts.

Thank you so, so much, Kiana, for all your support and thoguhts throughout this story. It really means more than I can say and I'm extremely grateful. ♥ Thank you!!

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Review #19, by patronus_charmTrue Romance: Ice Cream

21st July 2014:
Bahahah Iím first :P

Omg, Remus was so cute and Iím getting those feels you were talking about and itís so cute and I want to cry because I started thinking about Ronks and you know how that goes as itís so sad but so perfect but so good! ♥ I really liked how he went to Teddy for advice as Teddy was actually really good and go Albus being mature and responsible but I have a feeling youíre going to crush this happiness now.

No, no, no Rose what are you doing you idiot? But whoo go Brandon showing his wonderful new mature side with the way he said no to Rose and made her stop, but still Rose you idiot stop ruining it for Albus you did it with Scorpius so donít do it again with Brandon, okay? *gives Rose a stern look* Ha, I just realised is it weird writing someone who has the same name as you? :P

No, no, no ditch Corbin Scorpius there is something up with him I know there is! Ok, actually if there isnít it would be so awkward as Iíve always suspected that heís up to something but #yolo I will carry on with my hate for Corbin as thatís what it seems most natural.

A fab chapter!


Author's Response: *confetti* congrats on being first!!

I GOT THE RONKS FEELS WHILE WRITING THIS. But, yeah. It was a cheap shot for me to make a cute Remus child. I'm glad Teddy as the advice giver made sense. :D umm um um, why would you think I crush happiness? *cough* who have you been talking to?! :P

I was at first convinced you meant me, not Weasley. :P but, yeah, she's being an idiot. I like to think of Brandon as always having been mature :P he's just gained a new level of it. IT'S ONLY WEIRD WHEN PEOPLE YELL AT HER. :P

You can hold onto your Corbin hate - people do. Um, would you rather have scorbus or branbus?

Thank you for a wonderful review!!! Sorry for the idiot bits!


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Review #20, by patronus_charmTrue Romance: Only Myself to Blame

21st July 2014:
Apparently people race for reviews on this story, so whoo Iím second (if thatís a good thing, I feel so clueless :P)

Ah Brandon is so serious and mature now he has Cora and in a way itís cute because yay he wants to settle down and be a great father to his kid and I understand that, but it meant threaten Barnbus which would be way too sad. Gah, Albus is being a bit of an idiot though with the way he just comes out with some things but he is really young too. I donít even know now. #soconfusedaboutfeelings.

#awkwardmomentforrose. There I was cheering her on and feeling so proud but then my creepy guy alert when off its radar when Henrik came along because it was as if I just knew he was going to end up doing that. I did feel kinda bad for him as it must have been embarrassing, but to be fair, he should have read more into Rose and realised it was not happening. I hope this doesnít knock her confidence too much as that would be really bad for her.

Ok, Iím not sure what to make of Archibald, on the one hand it was incredibly romantic and cute what he did for Lily and what he said to her too, but on the other hand itís kind of like ew, itís a bit weird as you just started dating. I think Iíll remain neutral on this front for a while, but Iím still probably more on the ew side of things if Iím honest. :P


Author's Response: There is a race!! Sometimes at least. ^_^ *confetti* congrats on second!

Brandon is taking his role as father seriously. I think he'd be happy with Albus but wouldn't want to force Albus into more of a relationship than he was ready for. Albus does need to shape up quite a bit. #gladitsconfusing

#rosegetsawkwardinSpain Henrik was just confused about signals and lines. Rose won't let that kind of thing happen again. I think her confidence will stay the same after this. Kissing Pedro certainly helped.

Um, Archibald is a bit difficult to get a read on this far. They've been together for a bit over a month at this point. so, it's not totally unheard of for them to be in love.

Thanks for an #awesome review!!


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Review #21, by patronus_charmTrue Romance: The Wolves and The Ravens

21st July 2014:
Ooh a party letís see how this goes! I loved how Rose was like guys be nice with Lilyís boyfriend and then Albus actually was because I really was ready for him to start cracking jokes or something so this was a nice surprise. But gah, Albus, gah, what are you doing, gah, I donít know what do, gah, Rose what are you doing to him, why is he kissing another guy?! Why?! But whoo for Rose being the saviour because that was really lovely of her to do that!

So true, so true, ĎďYou have something special with him, Albus. Not everyone else is as lucky to have someone like Brandon.Ē And pay attention to that Albus or I will start throwing things at you.

Aw, James is getting a girlfriend maybe, or maybe heís just hooking up, either way this could be quite cute unlike Albus and Derrick.

Aw, that heart to heart talk Rose and Hermione had about relationships was really sweet and itís just so nice that Hermioneís being supportive of Roseís job, and giving her advice about just floating around the world. It really does show that even the worst relationships can overcome things and be okay again. Rose and Cora were so cute too! ♥ I really loved seeing them together but it was so awkward when Albus came along, so awkward in fact I did an awkward turtle with my handÖ

Ew Corbin ew. I am not liking him at all and stuff will be thrown at him as well as possibly at Albus. Maybe heís just dating Scorpius for the Malfoy money given how he was charming Astoria away like that? I think heís up to something bad, very, very bad and I do not trust him in the slightest!


Author's Response: Party time! Fabulous! Rose is trying to be nice to Lily's boyfriend. She's growing a bit. ALBUS WAS CAUGHT OFF GUARD BY THAT KISS. I had Rose intervene. ^_^ She gets a gold start for that.

Um, he'll try to pay attention to that - I promise.

James has a possible girlfriend. Okay, they're totally going out now. Albus and Derrick were definitely *not* cute in this.

I'm glad you liked Hermione and Rose's scene. I like to think Hermione has a lot of advice and wisdom to offer Rose if she'll listen. Cora is cute with everyone!! I love your line about the awkward turtle - that's officially made it into my vocabulary.

Corbin is trying his best to be likable!! He's not as bad as people think. :)

Thanks for a fab review!!


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Review #22, by patronus_charmTrue Romance: Where the Wind Blows

21st July 2014:
Wah, hi Rose, seriously four chapters of True Romance is the best way to forget about a filling so whoo Iím so excited to read them now :D

Ew, Eliza, ew is all I can say because how stupid are you to get pregnant just say your boyfriend stays with you? No, Rose is not being touchy about Scorpius but sensible, I just see this marriage heading for failure if Iím being honest.

Omg yay Astoria! Ahahaha Iím so glad sheís getting a cameo appearance because I love this little Malfoy family that being Astoria, Draco and Scorpius so much so yeah Iím so excited now! I really liked how even though Astoria asked about Corbinís blood status she still was interested in who Scorpius was dating and cared enough to ask and yeah anything she does I probably would like. But Draco still seems kinda off about his son being gay, I hope he comes around eventually and meets Corbin with Astoria as that would be really good for Scorpius.

Aw, Brandon is the cutest dad ever and all these little moments he keeps on having with Cora are just so ♥ ♥ ♥ I just really love them and keep them coming. And Albus ♥ He really is brave to come here and accept the fact that his boyfriend suddenly found out he was a dad because that is not the easiest thing to hear at all. But yeah so much cuteness I could die!

Omg this line ĎďYouíre my anchor and I trust you.Ēí you are killing me Rose, killing me, I just want to squee so much that I could go to squee heaven right now! Onto the next chapter! ♥


Author's Response: I'M LIKE THE DENTAL CURE OF HTE CENTURY. maybe not.

Eliza is a bit dim when it comes to these life choices. Eh, they might work it out.

Astoria to the rescue!! Well, to the talking. She's definitely showing a keen interest in her son's life and who he's dating. I mean, her questions are all pureblood centric but that's something she cares about.

I'm so glad you like his moments with Cora!! It's fun to write their relationship. Though I worry that she's too easy in the story but oh well. Albus was facing a lot to go see Brandon at this part.

I thought that line would be weighty and I'm glad it did!

Thank you for a lovely review!!! I"m a bit behind but will catch up soon iwth the others.


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Review #23, by patronus_charmSolace: Solace

12th July 2014:

Ooh I really loved this as it was just written so beautifully and really could have been a missing moment from canon. I really liked how you described Harry and Hermione together as it was a thing of desire at first, something borne from desperation than as their actions deepened and intensified over those moments, Hermioneís love for Harry did too and it was really love to watch. I think the reason why it worked so well here was because you placed it in such a sad moment of their lives you can see why they would turn to this and one and another and I guess find solace there. This was really beautiful and Iím so glad I read it!

House Cup 2014 Review!

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Review #24, by patronus_charmAmong the Flowers: She Didn't Notice

12th July 2014:

I really liked the emphasis on nature in this story and how it always seems to play a pivotal part in our lives as it was just so interesting and I really loved it. Your description of nature itself was really amazing too and you took real care with each flower, each moment of the sky and that was so impressive as this was all written in 500 words. You tied romance into this so well and left me wanting to know more and more about this couple and why they could never be as you led it into that so well I just wanted to know more and more about them, great story!

House Cup 2014 Review!

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Review #25, by patronus_charmTryst With Fate: The Curves Of Her Lips Rewrites History

12th July 2014:

My mind has blown up and never returned because what you did here was something I never ever would have suspected and yeah Iím lost for words right now. I really liked the idea of this Sybil/Snape/Lily love triangle as itís nice to see Snape getting some of the love as itís always Lily which is a bit dull, so this mixed it up. The friction between the two of them when she was with Dumbledore was tangible though and written so well I really loved it. You really caught of the complexity of the situation so well though and spun a new meaning of it with the way it seems as if Sybil just came up with that prophecy to be with Snape so that was really fantastic and I really enjoyed this new insight into their lives!

House Cup 2014 Review!

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