Reading Reviews From Member: adluvshp
  
1,733 Reviews Found

Review #1, by adluvshpSunshine: Hero

7th September 2014:
Hello!

Here with Prize Review #2 for Colour and Emotion Challenge!

I apologise for the long time I'm taking to review your stories but I'm so busy with so much going on, I'm getting little time... it will probably take me a while to get all the prize reviews done.

Anyway, this was a wonderful little chapter! I adored the way you wrote Neville. The insecurity, the question, of who Neville is now was very realistically written. His thoughts were justified and I liked how you portrayed them. It was also sweet how this ended on a positive note with Neville realising that he was still a hero, that the war was finally over, and him looking at Hannah.

I think this is going to be an awesome collection of Neville/Hannah moments so I'm looking forward to read more of it. This one indeed was perfect - great characterisation, narrative, flow, and grammar =)

Cheers!
AD
(AditiDraco95)

Author's Response: Hi Aditi :)

Don't worry about the timing ad stuff. I know how hard it can be to juggle fanfic with real life sometimes. I believe you started off in a new uni? All the best with that! :)

I'm really glad you liked my take on Neville. I was so nervous about messing up with him because he's such an amazing character! Your words are very reassuring.

Yay! I'm glad that you're looking forward for more. I'm definitely going to fill this with smile worthy moments. Or at least, I'll try. I hope to see you back soon :) Thank you for all your kind words. Your review is so sweet and it really made me smile!


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Review #2, by adluvshpTraitorous Hearts: An Unwelcome Visitor

7th September 2014:
Hello! Here for the Slytherin Review Exchange!

I quite enjoyed this first chapter. It seems like a very interesting story and you started it out well. The plot has been set, the setting ready, and the characters introduced very nicely. I like Astoria's characterisation, and the way you've portrayed Draco from her eyes too. Their interaction was interesting to read, and I liked it. The whole plot concept itself is intriguing, and all in all I enjoyed this very much. I'd love to read further and see what happens next so I'm going to add the story to my reading list and favourite it too =)

It's a great start so keep going!

-AD
(AditiDraco95)

P.S. I noticed you set the era for the story as "Hogwarts" but this seems to be a Post-Hogwarts story so I'd suggest correcting that to avoid misleading the readers =)

Author's Response: Hi AD!

Thank you! I'm glad you enjoyed it. And that you were intrigued. :D I'd love *for* you to read further and see what happens next. Totally honored to be on your reading list, and to be favorited!

And I shall definitely keep going. New chapter should be coming soon.

Oh, and about your postscript: the story is actually during the Hogwarts era. It begins during Easter Holidays in DH. However, you aren't the first one to think that, and I thank you for mentioning it. I had meant to go in and make an adjustment in that first chapter, to clarify, and I forgot to do it. Thanks for reminding me! I appreciate the CC :)

--Penny


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Review #3, by adluvshpA Moment of Fear: Lily

27th August 2014:
Hello! Here for TGS review exchange.

This is a very nice idea for a short story collection, and I liked this first chapter very much. It was interesting how your focus was on Lily's fear of marriage rather than the whole war thing. Marriage is a big step and any man/woman is bound to get nervous on their wedding day. I think you portrayed lily's nervousness and fear very well. Her question of whether she could continue to love James in the "unforeseeable" future was a very apt one. It is kind of sad that the couple never got that far though... but anyway, you got her thoughts and feelings right in my opinion.

The setting of the story was good too, and I liked the brief mention of Petunia. The memory of James' proposal was sweet too; I liked how it wasn't all fancy and extravagant but rather quite simple. Lily's parents were also included in the chapter fairly well.

All in all, good job! it made for a nice little read and I enjoyed it!

Cheers,
AD
(AditiDraco95)

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Review #4, by adluvshpEvent Three- A Wolf's Best Friend: there is more to come

5th August 2014:
Hello! Here for Review #1 of the prize for Colour & Emotion Challenge.

This was a beautiful one-shot. I loved the concept of friendship going beyond death, and it is especially very fitting for the Marauders. It was interesting to see this from Remus' POV, to see his feelings and thoughts after Sirius' death. You portrayed them perfectly.

The descriptions were magnificent, and had a bittersweet feel to them that I loved. The entire narrative flowed wonderfully and I had a great time reading this. I also liked how you ended this on a positive note, and maintained the theme of their friendship throughout. That little scene of Remus 'imagining' Sirius talking to him after his death was also very nicely done, and my favourite of this piece.

Your writing style was catchy and interesting, and suited the whole idea. All in all, a wonderful piece of writing with great emotions and a beautiful feel. I very much enjoyed this. Great job!

Cheers,
AD
(AditiDraco95)

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Review #5, by adluvshpGolden Days: What a Time to be Alive

30th July 2014:
Hey! Here for the TGS review exchange.

Aha this was a very nice little piece. I loved reading this. It was amusing to visualise older Harry and Ron, sitting in a porch drinking tea, and reminiscing about their old days. Those seven years hold so many memories - good and bad - and it was really sweet to take a trip down memory lane with the two best friends. I found myself smiling along as I read, as they talked about all the things of the past.

You described some of my favourite moments from the books here, like the flying car and Sirius' rescue. I also liked the way Ron and Harry talked about these incidents, their manner was that of two comfortable best friends, and their dialogues were realistically written.

The descriptions were very good as well, and I had a great time reading this. It made for a light and interesting read. It was a feel-good kind of piece and I enjoyed it! Good job =)

Cheers,
AD
(AditiDraco95)

Author's Response: Hey there AD!

I'm so glad to hear that you enjoyed it! I wanted to include more things that happened as they went through those seven years but unfortunately, due to the word limit, I didn't have enough room and the ones that I mentioned were the first ones that jumped to mind.

The flying car was probably one of Harry and Ron's finest moments in their young life. Not many people would immediately jump to the conclusion of taking a flying car to school because they missed their ride.

Yay for feel good stories!
Thank you so much for this lovely review!


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Review #6, by adluvshpAstoundingly Ordinary: Free

30th July 2014:
Hello! Here for the Slytherin review exchange =)

This was a very interesting story. I loved how you picked Igor Karkaroff as a character for this. I never gave much thought to him, to what would have happened to him after the war, so this was a unique and well-written plot idea. Him finding solace in a stranger woman's arms was nicely written. The way you expressed Igor's thoughts was believable and interesting. I kind of felt sorry for him. It was nice that he was overcoming his 'adversity' though. The prompt was used well.

Your descriptions were beautiful too, and I loved your choice of words. They painted a picture in front of my eyes and I was really into the story while reading. All in all, this made for a great read and I enjoyed it. I'm glad I got a chance to read it!

Cheers,
AD
(AditiDraco95)

Author's Response: Hello!

I'd been wanted to play around with Igor's character a little, and this particular type of story is new to me as well. Playing with the two new elements together was actually quite fun ^.^.

Thanks so much for the lovely review!

-Rumpel


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Review #7, by adluvshpRepentance: Grief

12th July 2014:
Yay you've updated! Oh dear things are just getting more intense. We finally 'meet' Rowle. And he has imperioused Slinky! Now that's not good at all. I am quite eager to know what happens next. This story is definitely getting darker. Great work!

Cheers,
AD

Author's Response: Chapter 16 was actually in the queue when you wrote your last review, I just didn't get chance to answer it in time for you to see!

I'm so glad you're enjoying Repentance so far, thank you as always :)

PM21


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Review #8, by adluvshpLove, Not War: Draco's Introduction

12th July 2014:
So I really like this opening chapter of Draco giving an introduction to his story. The way you've written his thoughts, it's like you're in his head. You seem to understand him quite well, and I like your portrayal of him.
I found that bit amusing about there being a lot of books about Harry and none about the people who helped him. Draco's reaction to that is nicely written and I'm glad he took matters into his own hands and decided to write something about himself (or get it written).

The part about Lucius made me feel sorry for Draco. His relationship with his father was anything but simple and loving. I also liked the whole contemplation about the concept of love. The way you wrote it again expressed Draco's thoughts perfectly, as that's how I'd imagine him to think about such things.

Great start to the story!

Cheers,
AD
(AditiDraco95)

House Cup 2014 Review.

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Review #9, by adluvshpEvent Three - Lament: A Giant and a Phoenix

12th July 2014:
House Cup 2014 Review.

This was surely a very interesting piece. The idea of Fawkes and Grawp being friends is something I never thought of, but now that you've written it, it looks so believable. I loved how you wrote Grawp's thoughts. I'd assume a Giant to be more 'stupid' but I think that is a stereotypical assumption, purely based on the fact that they can't speak human English. Their thoughts can be sharp and sensible and you showed that well. It was also kind of sad that poor Grawp was bullied and hurt, but I'm glad he met Fawkes and it helped him. The whole interaction between the two of them was really nice and sweet.

The descriptions were well-written and I quite liked reading this. It made me smile, and had a bittersweet kind of feel to it. It was surely a unique concept for the House Cup prompt, and you managed to justify it very well with your lovely writing. Good job!

Cheers,
AD
(AditiDraco95)

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Review #10, by adluvshpI am alpha: I am alpha

12th July 2014:
House Cup 2014 Review.

Wow, this was pretty good, and it almost gave me chills.

Your writing style is very interesting. It matches the theme of the story, and presents a haunting feel. I loved your characterisation of Fenrir, as the 'alpha' who kept turning more children to please 'his mistress'. The whole concept of the moon being his mistress was very unique and kind of creepy. Your descriptions were very beautiful and brought out some great imagery as well.

I'd just say that the flow was a little stunted because at times your phrases didn't come across as smooth. There were also some punctuation errors. I'd suggest giving this a thorough re-read, reading out loud, and trying to rephrase some sentences, as well as look over the punctuation.
Apart from that, this made for a great read and I really loved it. The plot especially was amazing, and your writing style accentuated it perfectly.

Good job!
-Cheers,
AD (AditiDraco95)

Author's Response: Hey!

Yes, it could probably do with a bit of editing. I wrote this story late at night, in one sitting, and did very little editing. That's my excuse! I'll try and remember to go through it thoroughly at some point, when I'm in the mood (and my stupid headache's gone away). I have to admit there are stories of mine which I am really proud of and care about getting right, and this isn't really one of them.

I'm glad you liked the characterisation! I find late-night writing can do some interesting things with writing style and results in some nice descriptions. Even if sanity and grammar suffer.

Glad you enjoyed it!

Thank you! :)

~ Leo xx


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Review #11, by adluvshpTrevor's Lost Again: Chapter 1

12th July 2014:
House Cup 2014 Review.

Hi there! This was a cute little one-shot. I enjoyed your characterisation of a young, nervous Neville.
The scenarios he though of, for why Dumbledore called him, made me chuckle.
Poor thing, he worries too much, but I'm glad things turned out fine in the end xD
I liked how you wrote Dumbledore too. His manner of speaking was nicely done.
For CC, I'd say that I'd have liked to see some more of description in the story rather than straight off thoughts and dialogues. The narrative would have been a lot more fun to read with some visualisation, by adding details about the surroundings, and about the events happening.
Besides that, this made for a nice read and I enjoyed it. The concept was cute and over all presentation was good.

Cheers
-AD

Author's Response: Thanks so much for your review! :)

This was actually my very first challenge piece so it was a change for me! I remember writing this in probably oh, maybe forty-five minutes before the deadline was due so I agree it lacks the description I normally have.

I'm glad you enjoyed my first-year Neville! He's not my usual character to write so it makes me happy you think I characterized him well! Thanks again! :)
~MadiMalfoy x


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Review #12, by adluvshpSybill The Seer: Sybill the Seer

11th July 2014:
House Cup 2014 Review.

Wow this was a really really haunting tale, despite being so short. The last bit, including the nightmare and the ending, literally gave me chills. You definitely achieved your purpose of producing a horror story here.

Your portrayal of Trelawney was also very good. It was interesting how her mind was focused on the fact that she is a gifted Seer as she died.

The little details included, such as Parvati writing a book regarding Divination, were also interesting.
I almost felt bad for Trelawney here, even though I never liked her much, so I'd certainly say you did a good job in writing this.

Your descriptions were perfect - nothing too detailed and nothing too minimal. The imagery presented was amazingly vivid.

All in all, this made for a chilling read and I loved it. Good job!

Cheers,
AD
(AditiDraco95)

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Review #13, by adluvshpEvent Three- Aperture: Focus and Exposure

11th July 2014:
Aw this was so sad and sweet at the same time.

I loved the whole concept of taking two minor characters and shedding some light on them and the way they deal with their 'adversaries'. The emotions of both Dennis and Romilda were presented beautifully, and I could really feel for them.

My favourite bit of the story was the memory of Colin that Dennis had - the 'time machine' moment particularly. It was also nice that at the end that Dennis found his silver lining with Romilda. It made me smile.

The over all dialogue and narrative of the story was nicely done, and I loved reading this. Great work!

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Review #14, by adluvshp(Event Three) Moony's Memories: One.

11th July 2014:
I loved, loved, loved this. Your descriptions were so beautiful, and the imagery you painted, especially in the beginning of the story, was amazing. The memory was a great way to start the story and made me smile. I really liked that it was one which Remus used to conjure his patronus. It is evident how much he loves his friends.

Your characterisation of Remus was just spot on, and the way you portrayed his inner thoughts and feelings was very beautiful and realistic. It was interesting and touching that in his last moments Remus thought of his friends, and he 'knew' that he would see them soon. It was also very sweet that his final thought was of Teddy, hoping that he would also have as good friends as his father.

Over all, the theme of this was really tragic but you depicted it in a way that it made me smile - it was sort of bittersweet - and I liked it. It made for a smooth nice read, so good job =)

House Cup 2014 Review.

Cheers
-AD
(AditiDraco95)

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Review #15, by adluvshpThe Brothers Three: The Pale Steed

11th July 2014:
This is getting even more interesting. It is strange that "Death" came out of the shadows to talk to Cadmus. Of course, it makes sense for it to ride thestrals. That is a very nice little detail that you've put there and I like it. It is also interesting how we get to see three of the brothers, so different in their characters, and yet still united by family. It is nice that they're ready to help each other.

Your descriptions were yet again beautiful. I especially like how this chapter is written years after the introduction, and you mention how the sins of the brothers have grown with time. It is all very unique and I really enjoyed reading that segment.

All in all, another well-written chapter. I am quite enjoying this story and I'd really like to see how it progresses, how the brothers 'apprehend' Death particularly, and your writing is very very good, so I'm going to add this to my favourites and follow it. Do update soon!

10/10

House Cup 2014 Review.

Cheers
-AD
(AditiDraco95)

Author's Response: Yay! Even more interesting! Yes, yes, the thestrals! I didn't necessarily have that part planned, but it came out so well!

WHAT? Favorited!! OH MY GOSH YOU JUST MADE MY DAY!!!

I feel special. You are awesome. :hearts:


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Review #16, by adluvshpThe Brothers Three: Introduction

11th July 2014:
Hello there! This surely seems like an interesting story. I absolutely love your concept and I can tell your plot is something unique and intriguing. This first chapter definitely drew me in, and I loved the whole darkness that surrounded it. Beginning the story with "death" was complete genius. I also loved how you incorporated the Seven Deadly Sins, explaining each, and how they could all be found in the tavern. The characterisations of all three brothers looks fantastic as well, and I'm really excited to see how their relationships develop and the story progresses. I am curious to see what you have in store for each of them.

The descriptions were beautiful, and painted an amazing imagery in front of my eyes. Your writing style is brilliant and the flow is superb. I was captivated while reading. Over all, I think this is a great start to what seems like an amazing piece of writing. I'm glad I got a chance to read this!

House Cup 2014 Review.

Cheers
-AD
(AditiDraco95)

Author's Response: This is probably the most personified piece I've ever attempted to create, so the fact that you like the style and the deadly seven is really, really encouraging!

I love all three of the brothers in different ways. There certainly is a lot of progression and change I have planned, it'll be interesting to see how it all ends up.

Oh goodness, thank you so much for this wonderful review! This piece hasn't gotten too much attention, and I think it's rather good, so it's nice to know that someone agrees!


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Review #17, by adluvshpRepentance: The Truth

11th July 2014:
Hey again! Oops so I just realised that this story is still a WIP and hasn't been completed yet. No wonder this chapter ended like this.

Poor Draco, I feel really sad for him. The pain he went through here was very expressed really well. The moments he shared with Hermione were also very sweet, and I'm glad he was there to comfort her. Ron's, Harry's, and Ginny's reactions were all quite plausible. I also liked the little conversation that Draco shared with Ginny.

It is terrible that Hermione's parents died but at least it is clear that Rowle is after her for sure. I certainly hope he is caught soon. Meanwhile, Pansy (and I think Ginny too) has recognised Draco's feelings for Hermione. I hope Hermione also feels something for him, and some romance blossoms between the two soon. It will be a nice change to lightness among all the darkness that has been going on in their lives.

All in all, this was a beautiful story so far and I hope you update soon with the next chapter. I really want to see this through to the end. Keep writing!

10/10
-Cheers, AD
House Cup 2014 Review.

Author's Response: Hello!

Haha I thought so, I was worried that I'd accidentally put that it was completed!

Draco's feelings are going to be put on hold for a while, and the next few chapters should shed some light on that for you,

Thank you so much, I'm glad you're enjoying it and I hope you continue to read as I update :)

PM21


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Review #18, by adluvshpRepentance: Together Again

11th July 2014:
Oh no no no! Hermione's parents can't be dead, no that is just cruel =( I feel so bad for Hermione now, I don't know how she'll deal with this. I hope the blame doesn't fall on Draco or Blaise for some reason, and that Draco is able to comfort her. I see the next chapter is the last so I sincerely hope things fall into place.

This was a nice chapter with Ron coming back. Lots of shockers obviously, especially with him seeing Draco and Hermione like that. His reaction was expected. I also liked the inclusion of Molly and Ginny here. You portrayed both of them nicely.

The dialogues and narrative were quite well-written and the whole piece flowed smoothly. I was completely absorbed while reading and I'm very intrigued to know how things turn out further. This is a great story so I hope the ending does justice to it.

Good work.

House Cup 2014 Review
-Cheers, AD

Author's Response: I know, I'm sorry :( It was awful to write that but it's the only way everyone can understand that Rowle is serious about finding Hermione again.

Thank you again,

PM21


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Review #19, by adluvshpRepentance: Dinner

11th July 2014:
This was a beautiful chapter with some beautiful scenes. I especially loved the last scene between Draco and Hermione. There was a peace about the scene and it was awesome. The imagery of the location was also amazing. I also loved the whole dinner interaction. It was nice to see all of them getting along. It is also a good decision on Hermione's part to tell Harry and Ron. Speaking of Ron, it was good to see him included in the beginning of the chapter. It also makes sense that he has found a girl, so there'll be no 'romantic' complications between him and Hermione. I wonder how Harry, Ron, and Ginny will react to the news of what happened to hermione and her living with Draco though. That scene is bound to be interesting.

I am a little sad to see that there are only two chapters left for the story so I hope some real romance happens between Draco/Hermione in the next chapter, we get to see some 'action' so to speak, and also that the plot wraps up nicely with Rowle getting caught.

House Cup 2014 Review
-Cheers, AD

Author's Response: The cottage scene was again one of my favourites and is actually based on a place in I like to go on holiday every year, it really is beautiful :)

More from Ron to come!

Thank you,

PM21


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Review #20, by adluvshpRepentance: Memories

11th July 2014:
Finally Hermione knows the truth that Blaise and Pansy know, that is good. The memory of Draco was very haunting and it gave me chills. I felt for him really strongly when I read the flashback. It made sense that Hermione reacted the way she did in the beginning, but after the memory, I could understand the change in her.

The hug between her and Draco was quite sweet too, and I'm glad things are clear between them now. I enjoyed the interaction between her and Draco towards the end as it brought them closer. I also liked the interaction between Blaise and Pansy in the beginning. Your characterisations are over all quite strong and I'm glad things are slowly starting to fall into place.

Good work as ever.

House Cup 2014 Review
-Cheers, AD

Author's Response: Thank you for your lovely words, as ever!

Hoping you continue to enjoy the story,

PM21


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Review #21, by adluvshpRepentance: Snooping

11th July 2014:
Oh no Rowle might be after Hermione's parents, now that's bad. I surely hope they're okay. The little spat between Hermione and Draco in this chapter was quite real also, and I liked that. It was also nice that they 'made up' after that too, and didn't hold grudges. The revelation that Hermione does trust Draco was also good, and I can see definite progress in their relationship. The beginning section with Draco "peeping" on Hermione made me giggle a bit. It's not that surprising that Hermione hasn't let a man get intimate with her, apart from Rowle's forcing, so I wonder if Draco and her will get there, and if so how.

So far, I'm really enjoying the story. I hope they catch Rowle soon, and that her relationship with Draco progresses well. Oh and I also liked the inclusion of Harry/Ginny in the beginning, to show their side of things. And I'm also curious about Draco's patronus form.

Good work as always,

House Cup 2014 Review.
Cheers,
AD
(AditiDraco95)

Author's Response: Ahhh, I know! I do feel awful for it but Rowle is cunning and was bound to go after them eventually.

More about Draco's patronus will follow in later chapters :)

Thank you!

PM21


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Review #22, by adluvshpRepentance: A Blossoming Friendship?

11th July 2014:
Hello again! I am glad you're portraying Pansy and Blaise in a positive light here. It's a fresh change from the way they, especially Pansy, is usually depicted in fan fiction. It does make sense that if Draco has 'grown up', then so would Pansy. The interaction between her and Hermione was also very nice and it brought a smile to my face. I am glad Hermione is feeling more 'at home' around Draco and his friends. The ending scene was also well-written as it provided a perspective of Pansy and Blaise. It is also believable that Blaise is not willing to let go so quickly of the past, but its nice that Pansy has cleared his doubts away.

The revelation that Draco was under a body bind curse when the whole ordeal with Rowle happened was quite shocking and interesting. The way you wrote it was also realistic. I like the blossoming closeness between him and Hermione and I hope it turns into something more soon, and that Rowle is caught.

Great chapter as ever.

House Cup 2014 Review.

Cheers
AD
(AditiDraco95)

Author's Response: Thank you for another great review :)

Pansy and Blaise will more or less be main characters throughout the story so I'm glad you like the characterization of them :)

PM21


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Review #23, by adluvshpRepentance: An Interesting Read

11th July 2014:
The relationship between Hermione and Draco is changing for the better, and I like that. It's cute that he got her some dresses and new clothes etc. 'for a change'. It's also sweet that slowly Hermione is trying to fix herself and feel better about things.

The diary entries were written really well and showed the torment Draco went through for not being able to help her. It was interesting that Hermione saw it, now she knows how he feels. Her reaction was also expected, with the tears and all. It was kind of Draco to not intrude. Their friendship is surely growing.

I am looking forward to Blaise and Pansy's visit and interaction with Hermione. The story is progressing nicely.

House Cup 2014 Review.

Cheers
AD
(AditiDraco95)

Author's Response: I'm glad you're still enjoying it! The diary scene was one of my favourites to write :)

Thank you!

PM21


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Review #24, by adluvshpRepentance: Missing Things

11th July 2014:
I enjoyed this chapter as well. I am glad Hermione and Draco are getting warmer with each other now. Hermione's reaction to the library was quite adorable. It's interesting how they've both taken days off work, and I wonder if anyone will find out that they're both actually in the Manor. I also like how Harry is not just in the sidelines in the story but that he's focused on as well. It is amusing that some still swoon over him though, haha. Over all, I am liking the characterisations so far of all three of them quite well. Your descriptions and details are also very good. It is also cute how the romance-y feelings are slowly starting to blossom between Draco/Hermione, with the 'tingle' and all that on touch.

I am excited to see how the plot progresses. Good work!

House Cup 2014 Review.

Cheers
AD
(AditiDraco95)

Author's Response: I couldn't write about Hermione without including a library somewhere!

Thank you so much for another lovely review,

PM21


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Review #25, by adluvshpRepentance: Unwanted Guests

11th July 2014:
First off, I don't think the pace is slow at all. It is quite perfect really. Your writing is very smooth with great descriptions. There are some places where I noticed a few off-sounding sentences but for the most part, it made for a nice flowing read.

Harry and Ginny's reactions to Hermione being seen with Malfoy were quite believable, but I wish they'd try to understand Hermione's position more. Hermione's reflection about everything that happened, along with Malfoy's "offer" made sense too.

It is obvious that Rowle is after Hermione even now, sending his cronies to do digging in her apartment. The scene between them was quite well done and I'm glad Hermione fought. I also liked the interaction between Hermione and Draco later. Hermione's state was understandable and all that emotion was bound to burst out. You wrote all of it quite well. I also liked how the chapter ended on a positive note, with another step in the direction of friendship between Hermione and Draco.

Good job as always.

House Cup 2014 Review.
Cheers
AD
(AditiDraco95)

Author's Response: Thank you for reassuring me, I was concerned there wasn't enough 'action' to encourage readers to continue so thank you :)

Thank you again,

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