Report a Review

This service is designed to allow HPFF users to alert the staff about inappropriate reviews.

Review:CambAngst says:
Hi, there!

I really loved this story. I thought you did a masterful job of taking us on an emotional journey through Andromeda's life. You picked some really important moments and gave us insight into what she was thinking and feeling and you managed to weave it all together with astronomical metaphors in a very natural-sounding and seamless way.

The way that you jumped around in time kept me really paying attention. I didn't have any trouble figuring out which period of her life each section was taken from, but it was revealed through the details. I thought that was a really good technique for keeping the reader focused.

I really loved the way that you contrasted the three Black sisters and where Andromeda fit into the puzzle. Your characterizations of Bellatrix and Narcissa were perfect for me. Poor Annie suffered the fate of middle siblings the world over: neither the dominant one nor the precious baby of the family. So she turns inward and loses herself in her study of the stars.

My other favorite moment was when she finally allowed herself to be angry back at her father. For a girl who'd grown up in the shadow of her family legacy the way that she did, that was a huge moment for her. Casting off all those years of conditioning to finally let herself be happy.

Your characterization of Ted was pretty awesome. He was warm and loving, but he also was upset and hurt and a little angry when he found out that she hadn't told her family about him. That was a nice touch.

The first section didn't make sense until after I read the last one, but that really worked out in your favor, I thought. I wasn't entirely sure how Teddy and Harry related to the story until I realized that she was on her way to visit Ted's grave.

So I did notice a few small typos as I was reading:

But it never did and she regret in that thought. - There's something off about the sentence. I'm not exactly sure where you were going with the thought.

It had not been her first outing with a boy before. - I don't think you need the word "before" on the end of this sentence.

Overall, your writing was really solid. Expressive and full of emotional punch, and everything flowed really nicely. Good job!

Your Name:
Reason for this Report:

Examples:
  • The review is offensive.
  • The review is spam or chit-chat (not actually a review).
  • The review was double posted.
  • The review has formatting problems.
Repeat the number: 453
Submit Report: