|Review:||Roots in Water says:|
It's Roots in Water here with your review!
Haha- I'm slowly catching up to your most recent post!
Oh my gosh- I loved the interactions in this chapter so much! Your characterization was spot on! To begin, your Sirius in this chapter was perhaps the best characterization I've seen of him. Ever. He wasn't flat-out joking in this chapter- he was serious, loyal to his friends and he wasn't afraid to step it up and perhaps play the fool to help them out. His actions in the Potions classroom were funny because he didn't even think about not stopping Alrek from getting a date with Lily. His casual insertion of himself into the conversation was beautifully done. :)
To tell the truth, I'd forgotten about Alrek and his mysterious attempts to get closer to Lily. Now that I've been reminded, I'm very curious to see what will happen to and with him.
The interaction between James and Lily was also fantastically done. It was so heart-warming to see them interact, close because they're close. Not defined by strict relationships- just growing closer and closer together until they both decide to take the leap into "romance".
I think that one of my favourite parts of this chapter was the mention of the relationship between his parents. The simple yet meaningful actions his father performs "because she likes it" show the strength of their relationship far more than words could describe. And when James said that it "all depends on the girl"... I was so happy. :)
Your Order of the Phoenix meeting was very well done. Once again I was very happy to see how you didn't neglect a single one of the characters in their discussion about who to contact about becoming an Order member. It was great to see them listing strengths that Peter has.
As well, I really enjoyed your characterization of Moody. I think that you did a fabulous job with him here; he was gruff but definitely in his element. His wording was also fantastic- "little brown thing" sounded exactly like something that would come out of his mouth. Furthermore, I found his comments about Sirius very interesting. Are they canon because they definitely sound familiar... Anyway, I think that you handled his suspicions very well, as well as the reactions from the Order members. Of course Moody wouldn't be one to shirk on expressing his opinions.
Minerva's perspective was very well done as well. Her pride at having successful and well-recognized students fit nicely with what we know of her, but so did her worry over introducing them into a dangerous atmosphere. She really does have a soft spot for her students; she cares about them.
One thing I did find a little odd was the manner in which they summarized the last major activity of the group. I guess that it was for everyone's peace of mind and so that everyone felt involved, but it did feel a little odd to be questioning that everything had been done exactly to specifications when there would be nothing to be done if they hadn't. But perhaps that's something that military-type groups often do...
I did notice a few typos that I'll quickly point out. To begin, with the phrase "My aunts home" it should be "aunt's" and with "Sirius's was looking" it should just be "Sirius". As well, with the phrase "the fist time" it should be "first" and with "smiley than usual, he'd have to find out" I would use a semi-colon instead of a comma.
All in all, I think that you did a fantastic job with this chapter! It was certainly very enjoyable and it moved both the plot and the characters along in an interesting manner. As well, thanks for the mention in your AN! :) And, as always, thanks for requesting a review!
Author's Response: I'm responding to this right now so you get my full excitement squee-ness.
First of all, I literally laughed at loud about your comment with them summarizing what had been done. I had to really think about where I picked that up from. A handful of the pre deployment ceremonies have done that sort of thing, bit it's not really procedure. Anyway, I've decided it's my *own* distrust for people and their competence in general that had Minerva going over to see that everything was completed the way it needed to be. Seriously though, you are so perceptive.
Your comments about Sirius made me so insanely happy. Like, I was tempted to hug my computer hoping the hug would get to you. I've probably told you all this before, but giving the boys a place they deserve is just as important to me is giving Lily and James a love that was *real* and not just a 'because we all might die soon' thing. I want it to be so clear through this that, no matter how this all ended, these four boys loved each other. Sirius and James were as much brothers as any could be. Despite their love for pranks and over confident attitudes, they were some of the most amazing people to have watching out for you. Now I'm going to get all feelsy because I DON'T UNDERSTAND WHY JKR TOOK MY MARAUDERS. Phew. Okay.
Alrek become even more important very soon... dun dun dun.
The Order meeting was really, really scary for me to write so I'm really thrilled that you liked it. I wish I could think of a more creative way to tell you how happy I am, but yeah. My brain is broken. I don't *think* Moody's comments about Sirius are canon... but you know quickly head canon and real canon merge, I'm sure, so don't quote me on that. I love getting to look at the group from so many different angels, though. The Order, the DE (another one of their sections is coming up soon) and of course from the group themselves. There's just eight students, with all these plans circling around them that they have no idea about. Okay, I better stop before I get all feelsy again.
Thank you so much for pointing out the typos ♥ I just edited them in my Pages copy, and I'll edit them in the published chapter when I add chapter 16 tomorrow :).
I just want to keep rambling so that somewhere along the way I get across how much I appreciate all your reviews, by I'm afraid you'll exit out of the window you read this response in if I ramble on too long ;).
Thank you ♥