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Review:WitnesstoitAll says:
Hello!

I was scrolling over your page trying to decide what to read, and something about this kept jumping off the page at me, so I decided that this was it!

I thought the use of second person was an interesting choice. I know you utilize this person in Seeing Double, a story that takes place primarily within Molly's head, but this story seems to have more action and things happening so I'm very interested to see how that works out. That being said, you write the second person so well! You have a way of making the reader forget that it is second person and just become immersed in the story, and that's a real talent. I was rather pleased to see that the discription in this story wasn't heavy or languid. James is a young man, and so the lack of overtly flowerly description suited him very well!! Well done! I know that I have a tendency to love the artful pretty descriptions, and so I know I'd likely struggle with toning that down to suit James for a story like this. :) Well done, well done.

Now I know this is a slash fic and I can't help but notice how much attention James is playing this white-wine drinking stranger. I wonder, though -- does James realize now that he's attracted to this man? Has he ever been attracted to a man before? akfasdjfoai. These are good questions to leave a reader asking because now I'm going to most likely have to continue reading this story to find out! lol.

All in all great first chapter! I hope to find time ot read the next one sometime soon. :)

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