Hello! I'm here with the review you requested over on the forums. :)
Unfortunately... I seriously can't seem to find anything wrong with this story at all.
Well of course, that definitely isn't unfortunate; it's just that I feel sad because you probably expect some criticism, and all I can do for you is compliment!
To answer your questions, YES!!! The set-up was beautifully executed and Hermione's character is just perfect. Her reaction is well-written (naturally, because you are a fantastic writer!) and trust me, it's very believable. If you were worried about anything seeming amiss... Stop worrying. In my humble opinion, it absolutely works in the story and serves as the disrupting event that it was meant to be to start the reall action.
Now for the part where I give many more compliments. I hope you don't mind my profuse admiration, because I give it to you freely.
To a person like me, an inexperienced writer aiming to try my hand at this fanfiction scene, you are a god/goddess of the fanfiction realm. You have an intense and captivating style, and the way the story reads so perfectly is every (smart) reader's dream. To put it simply, this prose is flawless. I saw absolutely zilch in grammatical and spelling derps, which are known to happen. Diction and syntax flow, together creating a scene that is impossible NOT to picture. The plot is intriguing, and not a dull moment can be found.
My question to you is: How do you do it, CambAngst? How are you able to put words down that capture so much with what seems like no effort at all?
You obviously have a shining talent, and though I can't recall reading any other story that you've written, I know that you are consistently amazing in everything you write.
The only thing I have to suggest to you is that you write a novel and become a best-selling author. I think that would be a tremendously great thing. And I'm not even kidding. :)
I'm sorry this review was quite gushy, but I couldn't help it. I haven't gushed this much on a review in a long time, and for this story, gushing was necessary.
Im definitely going to hop over to your page and read some more of your work now. :)
Author's Response: Hi, there!
Wow. I was hoping that you'd like it, but I wasn't expecting you to like the story this much! I really appreciate all of the kind words. I definitely don't mind your admiration. Feel free to give as much as you like. ;)
I'm glad you didn't see any small derps. My beta reader and I work hard to keep one another's writing clean and tight, and it's definitely good to know that our efforts are paying off.
How do I do it? For most of my stories, I just try to think of an interesting event or series of events that isn't covered by the books or the movies and then just let my imagination play with it. I write it down, I let it sit, I re-read it and marvel at how lousy it sounds and then I start to edit. Somewhere along the way, it converges on something that's worth sending to my beta reader and then eventually I decide it isn't going to get any better so I post it. Wash, rinse, repeat. ;)
Thank you so much for reading and reviewing this and all of the nice things you said. If you decide to read anything else of mine, I hope you enjoy it!