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Review:SnitchSnatcher says:
Hey there! It's Molly from TGS, here with your requested review!

First things first: can I just say how much I love your characterizations of Lily and James? Because I do. I adore them. James reminded me very much of a puppy in this - he was excited and wide-eyed and just all around adorable. And your Lily! Gah, she was flawless, with her sweet and gentle demeanor. They're both exactly how I always imagined them being, so great job there. Fantastic even!

I also really enjoyed all of the subtle in this, mainly when you were describing how James and Lily had grown closer over the course of the last year and so. It felt so natural, not at all forced. I particularly loved the bit where it mentioned Petunia asking Lily why she was so happy after she spent the day in the company of Remus and James. It's just so nice and different to see a James and Lily story where things evolve naturally. There's no external forces pushing them together (except the rain, but shh) and there's no dramatic circumstances that, again, are forcing them to "endure" one another's presence. It's just so organic, and you captured it beautifully.

I know I keep mentioning all of the things I liked, but that's because there are just so many things that are great about this chapter. The dialogue was realistic, the pacing are just right, and there were some very pretty descriptions in here, but you didn't let them overwhelm the chapter or take away from the main focus of the chapter, which is lovely.

Just an all-around great job! I know you wanted me to take a look at Chapter 2 as well, so I'll go do that now. I just thought I'd leave this here because you should know how much I enjoyed this.

Author's Response: Hey! I am so sorry it's taken me so long to answer this - I have a bit of a backup, but I thought I had gotten to this. :( I'm sorry. I am kind of lame sometimes.

I'm really glad you liked my James and Lily! They're two of my favourite characters to write, and I'm glad they lived up to your standards. :) I definitely wanted to show a natural evolution to them - I feel like often James/Lily stories can get a little artificial. Like, "Loud fighting, I hate you, well I hate you, oh no we have to patrol together, tada we're in love." And I just have always thought of it as developing more naturally and gradually than that, you know?

Thank you so much for the review, and I'm really glad that thus far this works for you. :)


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