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Review:justonemorefic says:
Hee, the beginning's so cute. Like how Elena's so hesitant to ask about Corinne, and the question sounds stupid, but she has to ask. I would so do that.

Oooh. The Longbottoms. My knowledge of Pre-Hogwarts is quite shifty, so I don't quite remember's who's alive/sane and who isn't at this point and time. Good to see them show. And AH! SHE'S HIS DAUGHTER! I think that scene where they tell her about his death could be a little more showy with the emotions rather than telling, just to be a bit more powerful.

A CHASE! I was a little confused at first at what they were running from -- just a mention of a shadow or a flash of a mask to indicate another presence would be enough. Maybe a bit more description around the explosion as well. Action scenes are terrifyingly hard, but I was worried for everyone's life, wondering if there'd be a casualty early (which is good!).

Ahh, I wonder what Corinne and Simon were arguing about :0 what's Burke? Old case?!

Welp, it's late! I'll keep reading tomorrow! ^__^

Author's Response: Haha :D Yeah, that has definitely happened to me--asking a question, and then realizing after that it sounded stupid, and maybe it would have been better not to. But I agree, Corinne hasn't shown her self to be one who is subtle in any shape or form, haha.

Yep, the Longbottoms were still sane when the Potters were killed. But honestly, in most cases, Post-First-War/Pre-Hogwarts dates are not the clearest. Like, which Death Eaters died/were captured before the Potters, which after. And finding times, beyond before or after is pretty impossible. Yay for canon research :D And then yay for creative license because there is nothing to show who Alice's parents were. :)

Okay, so I will try to clarify the emotions and the chase, at first. Rereading this, I feel like my writing of action scenes has improved some, so another edit of this chapter seems to be in order :)

Burke is Simon. Simon Burke. I see from your next review though that you've got that now. But I'll try to make sure it's clear in the chapter :D

Thanks so far for all the lovely reviews Gina! ♥


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