Oh, goodness. What can I even say about this? ♥ I suppose that I might as well start with the most heartfelt of apologies, because it really shouldn't have taken me as long to read this as it did. I have little phases where I'll read fan fiction like mad, and then I'll focus so much on writing I won't read for days on end. You're the fourth review I've left in about a 14-hour period, which is pretty good for me, so you can guess which phase I'm in now! But enough of that. :D
I already selfishly want you to write another Ron/Hermione one-shot. That is how much I adore these stories. I absolutely and completely lost myself in both of these, and that's something that's really, really hard for me to do with anything I read, fan fiction or otherwise. I'm a quick reader but I'm very easily called away by what's going on around me. This sucked me in like -- well, like the canon books themselves. Because you've made them that: They seem true and honest and real and alive. Glowing, I daresay!
For your first time writing Ron, you have completely and totally nailed his character. And Hermione's, too, but I already knew you could do that from reading OW&W. ♥ Ron's sometimes tricky to get into canon and you made it seem totally, totally effortless here. I found myself nodding at bits just because the way you wrote some of his thoughts and processes are so, so like what I imagine him to be myself. I cannot tell you how awesome that is to read!
And, again, the way you use words. Fantastic. :3 Your writing style has, if anything, hooked me in with sharper, deeper claws after reading this, and it's just pretty and mellifluous -- and it all ties together, which is absolutely no small feat in a 5,000-word one-shot. It takes a lot to write so much and say so much without it seeming like so much, and it's a talent. You should be proud of it!
A few quotes I grabbed to comment on, because I couldn't resist:
Hermione had fulfilled her wish: he now had so much stinking emotion that he didn't know what to do with himself. -- BRILLIANT. Tying back to that famous quote without even referencing it, knowing people would actually have to use their brains to understand it. Gah. That's amazing!
Ron was pretty sure that Hermione couldnít have transfigured the deluminator into becoming a meggyfone (or whatever it was that muggles called them). THIS IS SO. CANON. ♥ I love the Muggle lingo mess-ups, and there aren't enough of those in Ron stories. Not by a long shot! And that right there sold me on the absolute realism of this piece. :)
Picking up large teeth covered in deadly poison is never a picnic, but Ron thought that they'd done quite a neat job of it by the time that they were on the broomsticks. -- And more canon appreciation: So many people, although they love him in the books for it, forget how funny Ron really is. He's more than just comic relief, but it is at least a partial role that he plays in the series, and I just had the biggest grin on my face at that line. This story is fantastic.
He wanted to see her shining in white down an aisle, he wanted to hold a bundle of shine that was half-him half-her, and he wanted to lie down beside her eighty years from now, and still be smiling at how she couldnít help shining. -- THE MOST PRECIOUS THING I HAVE EVER READ. I did a total goofy clasping-the-hands-under-the-chin moment at that line, and I'm at work so you KNOW that's got to be good. My stomach got all twisty with fluff and affection, and you have hit right on the head that thing that people dream about when they dream of love.
This review's getting long, eh? I can't actually remember the last time I left such a long one. But you so, so deserve it, and maybe -- through this ramble -- you'll come to understand the great love I've got for this pair of one-shots you've written. ♥ And though your story might be done, if you ever decide to write another one, please let me know! Lottie, you've got such talent. These stories are fantastic, and I cannot even begin to tell you how much I adored reading both of them. Never stop writing, because you've truly got a gift! ♥
Author's Response: JANE! Eep please don't apologise when you've left me such a wonderful, gorgeous review - I understand exactly what you mean, because we all lead lives outside of HPFF :D I feel so proud to be reviewed by you!
Aargh you are very persuasive concerning writing a third Romione... I am highly tempted! They're so much fun to write -- although I have no idea how a third could be written as of yet -- and I'm just so, so happy that you can get so lost in my words :3 I'm just so glad that it made you happy and like them, and I just wanted to do tribute to Ron and Hermione's love! And glowing? I feel so shiny right now :D
I have been so worried about writing Ron, because he's the character I feel I know least about! I had to imagine him doing everything and pick him apart, so I was worried I might have put him back together all wrong. EEP I'm so, so happy you can relate to him and he's canon, because there is nothing more annoying than a bad Ron (IMO, anyway). You're making me blush so much, Jane! You're simply too lovely to me 8)
Eep thankyou SO MUCH 83 I do try hard to curtail my habit of rambling pointlessly on description and never know how deep to go with emotions -- so thankyou!! I am so, so pleased that you enjoy it, and that it doesn't stretch endlessly, because that's just so annoying -- MEEP THANKYOUUU :D My ego is so inflated right now √Ę¬ô¬•
I LOVE QUOTING :3
Ahha I couldn't help that sly reference to the infamous 'teaspoon' quote! It just sums up their relationship so nicely, and I didn't get a chance to write the moment so wanted to include it SOMEHOW :P
This was one of those RON IS FLAILING moments and I loved writing his muggle confusions -- they relate him back to Hermione nicely, too, and I wanted to put in that dynamic of their relationship :D
YES! THAT IS SO VERY TRUE :( I mean, Ron's a funny bloke (you have to be, growing up with Fred and George) and he's often written as so weirdly serious that it just doesn't feel right. It's not that he can't be serious and grim when he has to be, it's just that most of the time... he doesn't want to be.
Eep I'm so glad that you got all LOVE AND FLUFF :3 because it was one of the first images I had of Ron for this story, and it just made me desperate to write them, because they deserve their happy ending! I am so glad you loved it too :D
It is such a gorgeous and lovely review Jane - one I'm getting all tearful about because you've been so nice - and I am just so happy to know how much you love them, because to make somebody feel like that is all I want to do as an author :') Thankyou so, so much Jane, because these reviews have meant so much to me, and I will take your words of love and advice with me on my writing journey (if that's not too cheesy!) :)