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Review:Elenia says:
Hi!

You have a really interesting story under development here! I very rarely start reading stories that have only few chapters, because I'm a really impatient person and I always hate to wait for the new chapter, but your summary made me want to take a look. And as I've promised myself I'm going to at least try to review everything I read, I'm here now ^^

I'm really glad I did, because I liked this! Your writing is very good and it got better with every chapter! Your descriptions are amazing and I can really imagine it all. I was going to comment about maybe adding some more to the dialogue tags, but it got better with this chapter (:

The Plot! Now that's the reason I decided to peak into your story. The whole idea of Auror training intrigues me and I've been searching for a good story about that. So your story seems to be just the one for me ^^

I'm eager to find out more about your characters. They all seem interesting and different from each other. I really liked the dynamics between the four friends! That was all done very well. The prologue was also a nice way to tell some of their background and introduce the characters to the readers.

Pacing is fine as well. I did feel it dragged slightly in few parts of the previous chapters, there was just so much new information that I felt that you could've maybe saved some of it for later. But then again it really wasn't that big of a problem for me and again, this third chapter was a huge improvement to that!

Flow was perfect thanks to the amazing details and description. Your grammar was really good too, but what bothered me a bit was that you spelled few JKR's names and words wrong. Scorpious should be Scorpius and Slytherine is just Slytherin (:

The ending of this chapter and the sudden change of POV threw me off a bit and interrupted the flow for a moment as I was trying to figure out what happened to Taylor suddenly. But that can be fixed with a simple 'James's POV' on top of that scene (:

Anyways, like I already said, this was a really good start and I'm eager to read more! I hope I haven't put you off with anything I said, because I really, really liked your story! I just wanted to give you some tips for the future.

Hopefully you'll update soon and keep up the good work!

~Elenia

Author's Response: Thanks so much! I'm always torn when it comes to reading new stories. On the one hand, reading a story that's already got twenty chapters is kind of annoying but waiting for an update always drives me crazy. I'm really flattered that you read mine.

I'm so glad you like it! It's nice to hear that you think my writing's gotten better within the last month, that's my goal so hopefully I'll keep improving!

I'm always worried about my descriptions because I can see it in my head but I never know if I'll be able to explain it. I have a hard time parring it down because I could write a whole page describing the carpet. Haha, I'm glad you think it helps the story, though, instead of weighing it down with too much.

Dialogue tags always give me trouble. I get bored saying says but I also hate it when people use words that mean the exact same thing just to change it up so it's something I'm still working on. Good to know it's getting better!

I love reading (and obviously writing) about Auror training because it seems like such an interesting career. Hopefully I'll do it justice.

I love the characters. I made them as different as I could without it being one of those times where people are like, "how the heck are they friends?" because they're too different. I gave the backstory as an attempt to make it more obvious where they all came from.

Pacing is my hardest challenge in this story and giving too much information at once is something I was worried about. I'll keep an eye out for it in the future and try to continue feeding it in more slowly. I split the third chapter purely for that reason. If I hadn't split it I knew it would seem way to rushed.

I'll go through and fix the names for sure, thanks for pointing that out! Between the automatic spellcheck and just plain used to spelling them wrong I knew there would be a few that I messed up.

I wasn't sure how the ending was going to work out. I'll go back and try to make the switch more obvious but my goal was to have Taylor still be the one telling the story so I'll have to play with that a bit more so it's not too confusing.

I'm really glad you enjoyed it and I honestly appreciate your review so much! The 'update soon' ones are always nice to get but this one helps me a lot more.

Thank you so, so much for your review! I'll try to incorporate your advice in the upcoming chapters and I should update pretty soon since the next chapter just needs to be edited :)

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