Ah, I really enjoyed this (again :P). This is so good - it's just the right balance of romance, action and mystery... it's so obvious that it's taking place in a war - you do a really good job of reminding us of that every now and then, just in case we forgot - but it still feels like nothing much is happening - which, of course, it isn't. Still seems like it could fit into the fifth book so easily.
Bill! Lots of Bill! Excellent! I do love Bill... he seems so perfect. He's so clearly a Weasley - Fred and George's brother, but also Ron and Percy's brother and Ginny's brother, you know? He's like a mash-up of all of them, but he's also his own person with his own personality and it's so distinct from JKR's Weasleys. It's just brilliant. I like how Bill was effected by Fleur - giving in to her asking to work with him on the case of Mhairi's disappearance - without even realising it, even though he's not quite as effected as his co-workers. It makes him imperfect, and not special, you know? Not the exception or anything weird like that.
Fleur just gets better and better. I liked the snapshot of her working at the restaurant and the little details about that - how they liked to call their employees by French version of their names, instead of their actual names (Oh, on this point 'Jack' in French is spelt 'Jacques' - you just missed out the c, but I thought I'd mention it. It's pretty much the only mistake I noticed in the entire thing, tbh). It just made it come alive.
Ooh, Mhairi was attacked! I suspected, lol, but it's always nice to have confirmation that you were right :P Still, I can't wait to find out what's happened to her, what will happen with Fleur and Bill (I predict an explosion of temper in the near future...) and what Dumbledore/the Order will say when they found out Fleur's helping Bill with the investigation.
I'm so excited to see where this leads and how you work everything in. Keep writing, pwease! :D
Author's Response: Hee I'm glad you're liking it! I love writing it with the tense sort of atmosphere, with this brewing war that's being held under cover for some people and others don't believe in it at all. I do wonder if I've managed to keep the events in-canon enough lol, since I don't want Sirius to appear out of nowhere at some point :P
I LOVE writing Bill so much, and I think you explained why so much better than I ever could, since I get to take all the Weasleys and pick my favourite bits to make into a new person that somehow fits in with canon! That sounds ridiculous, oh dear, but I think he's just a brilliantly fun character to write. But I'm very glad he's not too 2D and super-perfect, because I just want him to be fun, real, relatable :)
I wasn't sure whether to include the restaurant scene to be honest, since it doesn't as such have much of a plot point, but I kept it for the characterisation - so I'm very glad it worked, in that sense! (And thank you for the heads-up on 'Jacques', I completely forgot how to spell it :P)
Ahha yes, a part of my not-so-subtly-laid plans have been uncovered! Hehe I can't wait to plant more clues though, and show just how her story tangles in with the rest of them :)
Thank you so much for a gorgeous review! I'm definitely going to keep writing :D