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Review:CambAngst says:
Hi. I'm tagging you from the Review the Person Above You thread in the common room.

OK, very interesting concept for a story. It's easy to see Harry and Ginny as the type of parents who'd take in orphans, since Harry was one and Ginny comes from the family that took him in. I like Alyce. She's a very appealing character with her feisty nature and irreverent inner dialog. Her brother doesn't come across really strongly in this chapter, but I assume we'll see a lot more of him as the story moves along.

Your physical descriptions of the characters are great. Lots of details that paint a vivid picture, very easy to visualize. Your descriptiveness in general is very good.

As for suggestions, I think the beginning was a bit stiff. I would have preferred to see you introduce the characters by moving right into the action and then dropping the details as things began to evolve. Still, it matches the overall narrative style, so it's not so bad. It just feels a little like, "OK, well why are you telling us all this?", if you know what I'm saying.

I noticed a few small spelling and grammar problems, but nothing fatal.

I'll keep an eye out for you in this thread, because I'd like to read more. Or maybe I'll just read more. ;-)

Author's Response: Thank You :)
Thank you, yeah Scottie has some DRAMA coming.
Aww Thank you, I try my best.
Yeah I understand what you mean, I'm not good at introductions but I thought, give a loud of info first so you can understand the characters a bit better :/
Yeah i realised that afterwards, so I'll change them when I put in the CIs I made etc.
Thank you!! Go on, READ IT, but make sure you tell me what you think about it ;)
X


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