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Review:Akussa says:
Hi! You're tagged!

That was such a great opening chapter! Everything flowed perfectly and the reminiscence moments were so well included in the story that it didn't break the flow at all.
I love how you used the different muffin tastes to show Fleur's personality. She was very well written and I found you really caught her personality spot on.

The little thing that bothered me was the way she talked. The fact that you kept her accent is fine by me (the eez and eet and all that), what distracted me a bit was the fact that you skipped the first letter to almost every word she said (eg. "Erhaps"; "’hey smell good, ‘es" ). She's french, she doesn't have a warm potato in her mouth!!! :P
Oh by the way, I'm french so this comes from a knowing person! After a while, living with only english people, you lose the accent but you can chose to keep it, it makes her charm. As for the letters we can't prononce well, it's more the "h" and the "r" at times, we have no problem with the other letters!

Other then that, it was simply perfect, I will definitly come back to read the rest later, great work!

Author's Response: Hey, thanks for the review! It was fun experimenting with writing Fleur and tying the muffins in to the story.

I'm sorry if I offended you with my attempt at French. I did a little research on it and tried to mimic the way I remembered her talking in Goblet of Fire without having the book actually on hand to check. I've seen some people leave out the accent entirely, but I wanted to try it at least for authenticity's sake. I'll try to do a little more research on it if I write her again.

Thanks again for your kind review! :)

academica


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